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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 1:56:38 PM   
CrappyDom


Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		The 53 year old man who is married and doesn't have a job probably has less business doing S&M than the 18 year old does.

(in reply to puella)
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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 3:01:18 PM   
Jonandelle


Posts: 37
Joined: 3/24/2004
Status: offline 		Greetings jezabel,

I was 18 when I discovered Gor on Austnet IRC. I lived with my parents. I found my Master about 2 months later. He is 13 years my senior.

Some 18 year olds are perfectly capable of making such a decision. Every 18 year old is perfectly capable of bearing the consequences of their decision. It is her responsibility to make the decision and she has made it.

elle{J}
property of Jonrhus

< Message edited by Jonandelle -- 5/3/2006 3:37:28 PM >

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 3:06:33 PM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline 		We all know that when we were 18 we knew everything...and wouldnt be told otherwise. She has to be left to make her own choices, the negative and positive, so she can grow from them....so I don't see it as necessarily a bad thing.

Age of consent here is 16.

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 4:22:53 PM   
TheHouseOfHussey


Posts: 149
Joined: 4/13/2006
From: Dallas / Ft Worth Texas
Status: offline 		Thank you for your opinions in this case study, enough information has been obtained. Please close thread.

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 5:36:45 PM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

We all know that when we were 18 we knew everything...and wouldnt be told otherwise. She has to be left to make her own choices, the negative and positive, so she can grow from them....so I don't see it as necessarily a bad thing.

Age of consent here is 16.


Well said.

But then, I'm another one of those who came to this very early. And am still very young. And, of course, know everything there is to know.


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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 5:48:03 PM   
TheHouseOfHussey


Posts: 149
Joined: 4/13/2006
From: Dallas / Ft Worth Texas
Status: offline 		Thank you for your opinions in this case study, enough information has been obtained. Please close thread.

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 6:53:19 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		My personal opinion on "how old is old enough?', when someone is willing to accept and able to deal with the consequences of their choices, then that is "old enough". 

Knight's kyra

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 7:06:24 PM   
KittenWithaTwist


Posts: 490
Joined: 8/3/2005
Status: offline 		What do I think about an 18 yr old girl in BDSM? Well, she's 18. Legally, she can do as she wishes. Legally, she must also deal with the consequences of those wishes.

quote:

1. The girl has not finished her education in high school nor started college, education should be her first concern.


I agree. Finishing high school is extremely important. It would be equally fantastic if she entered college as well, as I believe a college education is an asset to anyone. However, from my own experience, it isn't always an available option.

quote:

2. She lives at home with Mom and Dad and they do not know about her lifestyle. If she can not be upfront with Mom and Dad, how can she be true to herself?


I disagree with this one. Many people never come out to their families. This doesn't have any bearing on "being true to yourself". Some people wish to keep their private lives private.

quote:

3. She is barely 18, has she had time to grow and mature? Has she had time to become a woman mentally? Has she had any true relationships or just puppy love or lust? Is slavery a fantasy for her, or does she truly know what a collar means?


Has she had time to grow and mature? Who knows. But there's no law to stop her, either. Has she had time to become a woman mentally? Who knows. What defines womanhood? What experiences define womanhood? If it is only our periods, then yes, I'm sure she is one. If it is childbirth, our first sexual experience, menopause, a breast lump, a first job, an experience of sexual harassment? Who knows. Has she had any "true" relationships? I don't know. But one has to start somewhere. I've always dated people older than me. My youngest play partner was 3 years my senior. My oldest was 13 years my senior. Is slavery a fantasy or a reality? It's hard to say. Does anyone actually know before they try it out? I didn't. It took me many years to figure out that my idea of slavery was more about fantasy.

What is she looking for? I can't say. But I can say that the only way to find out is to ask. If you think she needs help, help her. If you think she can do well, then support her.

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 7:22:44 PM   
TallDarkAndWitty


Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHouseOfHussey

Thank you for your opinions in this case study, enough information has been obtained. Please close thread.


Yeah...it doesn't really work that way.

You see, we're not here to help you with your case study.  We're here to communicate on topics we find interesting.  This thread will "close" when people have nothing left to say...

Thanks for playing. *wink*

Taggard


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My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to TheHouseOfHussey)
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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 7:32:08 PM   
fullofgrace


Posts: 395
Joined: 3/24/2006
From: fl, usa
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic

quote:

ORIGINAL: BLKMADONA

I for One think one should be older. At the comment at young girls becoming mothers at 13..trust Me..9 times outta ten, it wasnt expected and they struggle..man! how we/they struggle! I know that of first hand! I think if they are living at home with Momma....they are not ready yet. But if they are out on their own(and I dont mean college-to Me Mom n Dad are probally still payin for it thus still constitues are living at home with parents) and making their own money..payin their own bills..then yeah...they MIGHT be ready. I think at 21 they have a better head on their shoulders rather at the age of 18. Now..again..thats not to say that young ones arent maturer than their age(we all know theres a few out there)....but its a character call...if one seems needy way before u go any further...then no...he/she is not ready.

Again..my opinion-brought to u by Blkmadona


Do you think that people should wait this long to get into serious vanilla relationships as well?



well, going along the lines of what blkmadona said, because i agree with quite a bit of it, i personally see a collar, especially as a beta slave, almost to the degree of commitment of marriage. i would not advise anyone who lives at home with mom and dad and is still in high school to jump at marriage, whether or not they're legally allowed to consent to it. it's one of those things i personally think you should be self-sufficient before you do, no matter WHAT age you are.


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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 7:41:51 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Am I the only person who thinks it's crass to post a link to your own commercial enterprise in all your CM forum posts?

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHouseOfHussey

Link To Our Ebay Store

http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQsassZthegoreanhouseofhusseyQQhtZ-1

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 7:49:39 PM   
AtlantisKing111


Posts: 181
Joined: 1/14/2005
Status: offline 		I tend to agree with juliaoceania and Wulfchyld.  If she is 18 then she is an adult according to the law and can be in the lifestyle if she so chooses (though getting into some BDSM clubs might be problematic if they only allow 21 and up).

As for not telling her parents about her interest in the lifestlye I'd say that that is pretty much the norm.  Most individuals keep their BDSM activities in the closet.  It's not very socially acceptable (especially for Male Dom/female sub couples) to be open about these sorts of things.  Most families will disown someone or at least make life difficult for them should they find out about someone's BDSM life.  Which is one reason why we don't out each other.

While her being so young does indicate that she is still learning what works for her, what she likes/does not like and what she wants her life to include, I'd say that all of us go through that period.  Will she make mistakes?  Sure.  We all do/did at that age.  It's simply a part of life. 

Is this a misake on her part (or his) though?  Tough to say.  Only time will tell.

AtlantisKing

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 8:12:49 PM   
amayos


Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Phoenixandnika

quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

But then again, she would have been raised quite differently from the corporate capitalist cookie cutter teeny bopper template that brainwashes our youth in the first place.


amayos I love how you said that!



Thank you. I trust you can relate.

(in reply to Phoenixandnika)
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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 8:23:25 PM   
Phoenixandnika


Posts: 748
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: Aberdeen Maryland
Status: offline
*smiles*
Yes, very much so.
Mind if I use that saying on an av?
 
Phoenix's Nika
 


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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 8:26:39 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		I was submissive and did not know or understand it, at a very early age.  Had I encountered and been owned by a good Master at 18, my life would have turned out much differently, and I would have avoided many unnecessary and damaging pains.

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 8:34:48 PM   
amayos


Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Phoenixandnika

Mind if I use that saying on an av?


Sure...but what's an av, out of curiosity?

Please forgive my stupidity if this is an obvious acronym.



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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 8:37:05 PM   
Phoenixandnika


Posts: 748
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: Aberdeen Maryland
Status: offline 		Thank you.
 
Avatar, signature, personal tag used in emails and such. I love to play with graphics and add sayings that describe me or friends onto them.
 
Phoenix's Nika

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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 8:37:13 PM   
amayos


Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

I was submissive and did not know or understand it, at a very early age.  Had I encountered and been owned by a good Master at 18, my life would have turned out much differently, and I would have avoided many unnecessary and damaging pains.


This is pretty well summed up, girlie. If a girl can be lead to understand her nature earlier, the labyrinth can most certainly be shortened.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
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RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 8:38:44 PM   
amayos


Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Phoenixandnika
Thank you.

Avatar, signature, personal tag used in emails and such. I love to play with graphics and add sayings that describe me or friends onto them.



Ahh, now I get it. :)

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Profile   Post #: 79
RE: How Old Is Old Enough? - 5/3/2006 8:48:45 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline
quote:

I think it says an awful lot more about the man than the girl that this relationship is taking place.


my aren't we being judgemental....

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