RE: Don't call me "Master"

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Don't call me "Master"

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Don't call me "Master"

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 5 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/1/2011 6:33:51 PM

BurntKitty

Posts: 3340
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: Here To Eternity.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

I understand its a submissive jesture and a wish to show respect, but if I have never looked down at you with a fist full of your hair I am NOT your master!
is it just me?
It has already been said in this thread, but this happens to submissives as well...addressed by a dominant as Sub, Slut,
Girl, etc. Speaking only for myself...those terms float like a box of rocks.

I'll agree with this also. It's as annoying as being referred to in the 3rd person: "How is the girl tonight?"

Ugh...

_____________________________

Cat Quotes

Count Boogie's Foot Fetish Anti Creepy Training video

(in reply to sirsholly)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/1/2011 7:03:17 PM

MsLadySue

Posts: 2254
Joined: 12/18/2004
Status: offline

I totally understand your pet peeve. I dislike someone calling me Mistress when we don't know each other from Adam. Thankfully some actually take the time to ask how I prefer to be addressed.

_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

(in reply to salemartist)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: Don;t call me "Master" - 3/1/2011 7:07:25 PM

BKSir

Posts: 4037
Joined: 4/8/2008
From: Salt Lake City, UT
Status: offline

Nope, OP, not just you by any means. I hate it. Unless they're my sub, or their D-type has specifically instructed them to refer to other D's that way, then good lord, don't call me Sir/Master/Sire/etc... I do appreciate the gesture, and I may have an over-inflated ego, but, that's not part of it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsLadySue

I totally understand your pet peeve. I dislike someone calling me Mistress when we don't know each other from Adam. Thankfully some actually take the time to ask how I prefer to be addressed.

Oooh, that would be nice. I think many of the S-types here on CM could and possibly should take this idea and run with it. :)

< Message edited by BKSir -- 3/1/2011 7:08:43 PM >

_____________________________

We'll begin with a spin, traveling in a world of my creation. What we'll see will defy explanation.

I am the voices in your head.

BiggKatt Studios

(in reply to sweetsub1957)

Profile

Post #: 23

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/1/2011 8:07:31 PM

BigMasterCinTN

Posts: 4
Joined: 2/27/2011
Status: offline

I am A Master, but I agree.... untill I have a girl collared and begging, I'm not their Master. I prefer Sir... much more appropriate, yet still respectful.... it's not just you.

(in reply to salemartist)

Profile

Post #: 24

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/1/2011 10:23:56 PM

avena

Posts: 80
Joined: 12/4/2010
Status: offline

i get rather tired of having to explain to people that i have a name, and i'd prefer if they used it. the only one who calls me by various labels without me batting an eyelash, is the one who's collar i wear. i find it amusing to see how many "Doms" get their knickers in a knot over the fact that i don't answer to 'slave', 'slut', 'girl', 'little one' or any other label they care to use...just because they're dominant and i'm submissive.

i've even been told i'm a bad sub because of it! i'm sure D is thrilled that these total strangers have informed me of my bad sub status, so i can go to Him and ask Him to beat it out of me...

funny enough, those same "Doms" get upset when i don't call them Master, Sir, Lord or whatever their chosen honourific is. i don't even call my own Master "Master". why on earth would i call someone by that title??

(in reply to salemartist)

Profile

Post #: 25

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/1/2011 11:11:40 PM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine

quote:

ORIGINAL: salemartist

I understand its a submissive jesture and a wish to show respect, but if I have never looked down at you with a fist full of your hair I am NOT your master! is it just me?

Greetings,

I have always found it odd when a gentleman addresses me as girl, slave, or little one. Particularly when we have no connection and have never conversed in the past. Although I don't care for it, I maintain my composure and usually indicate in a polite manner that porcelaine is fine. It isn't something I'm willing to debate or get worked up about. On the flip side, I do not utilize honorifics when I'm speaking to them unless he's involved with someone I'm acquainted with or we have established a rapport that dictates that form of address.

Namaste,

~porcelaine

Slaves collared to us and me personally will always address males identified by me as Gorean as Master and identified Gorean Free Women as Mistress. Others, I expect them to enquire how the person is to be addressed.

When a sub/slave who I don't know from Adam or Eve (except by the naked tits ), addresses me as master my ready response is

Yes I am a Master, but, not your Master! (To which I may add if they are uncollared,...YET!!)

< Message edited by IronBear -- 3/1/2011 11:12:18 PM >

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to porcelaine)

Profile

Post #: 26

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/1/2011 11:44:17 PM

cherryunicorn

Posts: 4
Joined: 1/19/2011
Status: offline

at the OP....Yes Master, as you wish..... ;)

(in reply to IronBear)

Profile

Post #: 27

RE: Don;t call me "Master" - 3/1/2011 11:46:27 PM

FukinTroll

Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957

Oh my. So is comparing this.......

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll
Submissive: Things are clicking but he/she is still on their own agenda.

To this.......

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll
Tentative slave: You're agenda is looking pretty good but he/she is still gauging how much you appreciate and respect them as a person/dynamic partner.
Slave: You have taken out all your freaks and monsters and they all like fukin his/her freaks and monsters, you are clicking and meshing on every level, he/she trusts you implicitly and he/she surrenders completely to you, trusting that you will provide and meet all his/her needs, maybe not all the wants, but the needs are assured.

.....saying that submissives are self-centered and all about themselves and somehow slaves, even tentative slaves, are inherently selfless, better commodities and more committed than submissives? Gee, I hope not. That would be like saying that somehow "Masters" are inherently more Dominant and capable of leadership than "Doms" and Doms are yet another step above "Tops." Whatever.

~sweetsub~

P.S. Did someone say valium? haha Just kidding.

Again... YMMV, this isn't a one true way hypothesis, it is my fukin way hypothesis... take it, leave it, doesn't matter one fukin bit to me.

< Message edited by FukinTroll -- 3/1/2011 11:47:30 PM >

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to sweetsub1957)

Profile

Post #: 28

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 12:20:11 AM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

Slaves collared to us and me personally will always address males identified by me as Gorean as Master and identified Gorean Free Women as Mistress. Others, I expect them to enquire how the person is to be addressed.

There is a caveat in what I stated and that wasn't mentioned since it isn't applicable at present. When owned I use an honorific as a form address for all dominant parties. My partners are generally very protocol oriented and I shift up automatically when involved. But while I'm fancy free I've found the other approach presents less headaches and allows me to navigate the online landscape without much upset.

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll

Again... YMMV, this isn't a one true way hypothesis, it is my fukin way hypothesis... take it, leave it, doesn't matter one fukin bit to me.

I didn't take it but I did agree.

Namaste,

~porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to IronBear)

Profile

Post #: 29

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 1:03:27 AM

Awareness

Posts: 3918
Joined: 9/8/2010
Status: offline

If a woman tosses out honorifics at the drop of a hat, then she's uninteresting. I want a prize that's hard won, not some pathetic doormat desperate to fall at the feet of any self-identified dom with a bad haircut and a neckbeard.

_____________________________

Ever notice how fucking annoying most signatures are? - Yes, I do appreciate the irony.

(in reply to porcelaine)

Profile

Post #: 30

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 2:47:35 AM

tazzygirl

Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline

~FR

Guess no one took in the fact that their is a huge difference between saying... yes Master.. and yes, my Master.

Ah, the subtle differences are lost on many, I suppose.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to Awareness)

Profile

Post #: 31

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 4:25:16 AM

phoenixmoonn13

Posts: 398
Joined: 6/11/2010
Status: offline

my master is master other doms havent collared me so none of them gets called anything but their name its not to do with submission as i will always be respectful and i can thelp but show who i am but they are not my master so dont get given teh honour of bing called it. however if i am with master an happen to meet other masters then i am to call them sir x y or z what ever there name is. master also doesnt like to be called master by those who do not wear his collar. like wise as someone said i am not girl or anyof the toehr things to them eihther i am only girl etc to master.

(in reply to tazzygirl)

Profile

Post #: 32

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 4:29:58 AM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

~FR

Guess no one took in the fact that their is a huge difference between saying... yes Master.. and yes, my Master.

Ah, the subtle differences are lost on many, I suppose.

Well to split hairs (pubic of course), I was trained that it is (Gorean wise), not acceptable for a girl to call her Master "my Master" as it is possessive and a Gorean slave owns no possessions. The "my" can be all in the voice and body language which is then perfectly acceptable. Just a small thought. Some things still stay with me.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to tazzygirl)

Profile

Post #: 33

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 5:54:16 AM

tazzygirl

Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline

when owned, you do as commanded. I know very few gorean men... though i am sure there are some who insist their girls do it otherwise... who prefer their girls to call other gorean men something besides "Master". My ears still ring from the time I called a gorean man "Sir".

Its all a matter of training and expectations of the slave. The slaves of goreans are trained a bit differently. However, I have also been known to accept the desires of the man... or woman... in question. FP Dreamer (FP = Free Person) was one such man. He allowed only one to call him "Master". However, understanding the position that put many girls into, he allowed us to address him as FP.

To this day, I address only my father as "Sir"...and the occassional older restaurant patron.

quote:

but they are not my master so dont get given teh honour of bing called it.

Maybe thats the big difference. The gorean men I know do not consider it an honor to be addressed as such... they consider it their right.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to phoenixmoonn13)

Profile

Post #: 34

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 5:55:44 AM

tazzygirl

Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline

quote:

Well to split hairs (pubic of course), I was trained that it is (Gorean wise), not acceptable for a girl to call her Master "my Master" as it is possessive and a Gorean slave owns no possessions. The "my" can be all in the voice and body language which is then perfectly acceptable. Just a small thought. Some things still stay with me.

And therein lies the differences in training. I was trained all gorean men were Master, and a slave was not allowed to utter a FM's name... so all men were Master... only one was to be considered "my Master".

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to IronBear)

Profile

Post #: 35

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 6:49:38 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

You're not the only one, OP. As a leather person, I prefer folks using leather protocols. That means that people not in a dynamic with Me should only be calling Me "Mistress" if there is a qualifying name immediately following. Mistress Pact works just fine or Mistress <insert real first name here> is ok, too, but just Mistress implies a dynamic that doesn't exist.

Two exceptions for Me on this. If I'm dealing with someone who is owned and the person they are collared to has instructed them to do this, I'm not going to correct them. I'm not here to make the protocol decisions in other people's dynamics. The other is certain play partners that I'll allow them to call Me Mistress during play. I have one play partner now who gets into better head space by using the term, so I allow it.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to tazzygirl)

Profile

Post #: 36

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 6:52:54 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: salemartist

I understand its a submissive jesture and a wish to show respect

No, it's a desperate jesture, calling you Sir would be a wish to show you respect. (I don't address people I don't know as Sir, it's reserved for those that have earned my respect.)

I'm also one of the ones that find someone using pet names when addressing me is rude.

And the third side of the coin is the random email that lays out what my life will be with him and how I will address him as Master.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to salemartist)

Profile

Post #: 37

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 8:30:56 AM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

You're not the only one, OP. As a leather person, I prefer folks using leather protocols. That means that people not in a dynamic with Me should only be calling Me "Mistress" if there is a qualifying name immediately following. Mistress Pact works just fine or Mistress <insert real first name here> is ok, too, but just Mistress implies a dynamic that doesn't exist.

Greetings,

This is part of the caveat I mentioned earlier. When conversing with Leatherfolk I will address them as Sir or Ma'am as a courtesy. I'm aware of the culture and have great respect for it. I realize that protocol is usually a hot button for some, but it needn't be as divisive in my opinion. Uttering an honorific doesn't increase or lessen my status with the other party. It is merely a demonstration of my ability to be polite, respectful and mindful of other perspectives.

Namaste,

~porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Profile

Post #: 38

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 8:51:00 AM

sofldan

Posts: 150
Joined: 11/15/2008
Status: offline

I don't mind being called Sir, to me thats a sign of respect for who I am. I used to hate it when I was younger I would always look around to see if they were talking to my Grandfather. And Sir is common term of respect for someone even in the 'nilla world. Well maybe not common as much anymore but I wont get into the degradation of our society here.

But for someone I have never met to call me Master makes my skin crawl and really has the chance to send me off the deep end on a rant. Don't call me Master if you don't know me. If you do know me then it's different.

_____________________________

Remember the fallen who gave all for our freedom. US Army veteran.

Hey lemme tie you up, all the cool kids are doing it!

(in reply to porcelaine)

Profile

Post #: 39

RE: Don't call me "Master" - 3/2/2011 9:05:41 AM

Aynne88

Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline

Oh chill dudes. I am so willing to bet that we women get far more terms tossed at us than you manly men get the occasional "Master" from a newbie.

Let's see..this week alone: Pet, lil girl, *gross* slut, babygirl *ick again* and little one. Not to mention the super original generic salutation of slave.

No need to worry, I won't be calling any random man Master or Sir. You can all breathe a sigh of relief.

_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)

(in reply to sofldan)

Profile

Post #: 40