RE: Dommes and Doggy-style.

RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (Full Version)

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Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 4:07:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather quote: No it doesn't, but power isn't often too far away.... I can think back to a couple of vanilla BJ's that ended abruptly because I grabbed the girl's hair or head etc. quote: I can't seem to find it now but someone recently (you, perhaps?) mentioned she can control a blowjob merely by knowing she can stop anytime she likes. Such a simple concept - that never once occurred to me. Isn't this contradictory? I mean did it really never occur to you even after it had happened to you? Not if you use your imagination a little.... I mean, it didn't "end abruptly" because she had a bus to catch. Think "huge fight"...! lol Your first quote was my experience from a time over 30 years ago. Your second "contradictory" quote was related to a Domme's post 2 days ago. The only contradiction (if any) is a matter of Dom vs Domme control perspective. As that Domme said, she controls through the knowledge she can stop anytime she chooses. But the same sex act in my D/s (and probably every male Dom's D/s), the fem/sub doesn't get to choose. Focus.

LadyConstanze -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 4:21:33 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 The only contradiction (if any) is a matter of Dom vs Domme control perspective. As that Domme said, she controls through the knowledge she can stop anytime she chooses. But the same sex act in my D/s (and probably every male Dom's D/s), the fem/sub doesn't get to choose. Focus.[/font][/size][/color] She does, since it's all consensual, she can leave you anytime, so she does have a choice...

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 4:35:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze To be perfectly honest, I always thought a guy must trust a woman a lot to put his penis into her mouth... I always wondered why most guys weren't worried about teeth... Well I wondered a similar thing about Dommes and doggy sex. As I suspected, the ladies of 'Ask a Mistress' welcomed the chance to share their experi...., ummm...., thoughts. Always an open and friendly forum for asking a question.... lol But since you're already on all fours.... (wink) Much like the doggy-sex, it's all in the headspace. Me personally; I don't play with just anyone willing, so trust is a big factor in the choices I make and really, I personally don't know of anyone whose actually had theirs bitten, let alone bitten off. In a D/s sense, I reinforce her headspace with bondage, mostly 'cause I love seeing her all helpless. When I look in her eyes, I just know that biting is the furthest thing from her mind.... You think too much like a Domme...! ;) Focus.

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 4:44:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: ORIGINAL: Focus5 We'll just hafta disagree on the size and strength thing. Honestly, Focus, I think too many of these sorts of debates are ultimately grounded, utterly wrongly, in a view of human nature that draws far too much from non-human nature. Physical strength is what other large mammals do - it's not what humans do. Even a very knackered old female chimp could probably beat me up, yet I think I'm now roughly three times as strong as the average woman. Humans' strength is in the brain. The tiniest woman, with not even very much in the brain department, could trick me into a powerless and completely vulnerable position, if she wanted to. She'd know it, I'd know it . . . so it'd become a redundant matter. Instead, we'd do it all by consent. It'd be more civilised - or, put another way, more fitting to human nature. The trouble is you can make a reasonable argument the other way, too. Unlike almost every other species of animal on the planet, the human animal varies greatly in size and strength per individual. Dogs come to mind, too.... But never fuck around with chimps - they are soooo NOT the (allegedly) cute critters of 1960's television. Focus.

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 4:56:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SexyBossyBBW [:)] quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 That's the thing; you don't necessarily need what you never had. If women and Dommes don't have the brute strength relative to their male partners, and the vast majority don't, then they don't fuck that way.... So yeah, I was kinda curious as to how Dommes do adapt in that particular circumstance. Focus. Oooh... I never much thought about it, or thought much brute strength was required. I do have fairly big legs (muscular too), and have doggy style phucked a gentleman or two, but never gave it a second thought really in terms of strength required. Maybe I was just tall enough to not have noticed it as an issue (anymore than if he were behind me). You've also just made me realize, that I haven't had, or much enjoyed doggy style... I consider it impersonal (emotionally detached), when done to myself. I've never thought of myself as particularly strong, since I'm also fairly dainty, about how I want to be touched. I didn't think of your question, from a doer's perspective before this post. [:)] M Size and strength isn't anything to do with a particular sex act so much as attitude and how you like to do things. If you're naturally stronger than most, it tends to get utilised in your techniques, mostly without you realising it. For me, there have certainly been times during the throes of passion where I've had to be conscious of not hurting my girl. Which can be a bit tricky with a partner who likes it rough, herself.... Focus.

LadyConstanze -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 4:56:50 AM)
As I said before, it comes down to the choice of having an orgasm versus several, in that case my pleasure is dominant... (G spot) You know if there was an issue of the guy doing something I wouldn't like him to do, he wouldn't even get a chance to fuck me, if you want me to be perfectly blunt so the issue simply doesn't arise, as I said, I'm also extremely picky when it comes to my choice of sexual partners, so seriously nothing I ever had to worry about. We had the discussion recently, a woman said "Do you have this huge dogs because you feel more protected?" I was completely surprised, because the thought of keeping my Dobies for protection never occurred to me, they're just beloved, pampered pets, companions for long walks. My other half and a few friends were in hysterics and the general consensus was, a mugger or a rapist would possibly prefer being bitten by the dogs, instead of having his testicles ripped off by an extremely displeased redhead. For ages I wondered why a lot of women were afraid to walk home at night, living in big cities like NYC, Munich, London, Melbourne, LA, Milan, Dublin, etc. I was never too worried and the hoods I lived in (especially as a student) weren't always the classiest, a light bulb switched on when during a martial arts class the teacher talked about body language during a fight, how to avoid fights and appearing aggressive. If you carry yourself like you're afraid to be mugged and raped, a potential rapist will pick up those signals and it makes you a target. That doesn't mean that I would advise to walk through gang territory at night on your own, but just given "normal" situations like walking home from a pub or a bar. Rapists and muggers are looking for easy pickings.

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 5:05:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 The only contradiction (if any) is a matter of Dom vs Domme control perspective. As that Domme said, she controls through the knowledge she can stop anytime she chooses. But the same sex act in my D/s (and probably every male Dom's D/s), the fem/sub doesn't get to choose. Focus. She does, since it's all consensual, she can leave you anytime, so she does have a choice... This is rather counter-productive.... I mean, the male sub servicing his Domme doggy-style has exactly the same choice to quit prematurely. And I've yet to meet a sub who was content making choices. Surely this discussion and the majority of people involved is a little further along the road than newbie dynamics, no? Focus.

LadyConstanze -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 5:17:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 The only contradiction (if any) is a matter of Dom vs Domme control perspective. As that Domme said, she controls through the knowledge she can stop anytime she chooses. But the same sex act in my D/s (and probably every male Dom's D/s), the fem/sub doesn't get to choose. Focus. She does, since it's all consensual, she can leave you anytime, so she does have a choice... This is rather counter-productive.... I mean, the male sub servicing his Domme doggy-style has exactly the same choice to quit prematurely. And I've yet to meet a sub who was content making choices. Surely this discussion and the majority of people involved is a little further along the road than newbie dynamics, no? Focus. Focus, uhhhh, I hate to point out the obvious, but you know a guy having sex with a woman, I'd say in 99% of all cases he's not likely to quit prematurely out of his own free will, unless it's a premature ejaculation, stuff she could say during sex might have him wanting to quit like "Ooops, I'm not on the pill" or "Btw I got the results of the STD check..." but that would most likely result in him losing the horn. I don't know what kind of subs you met, but my experience is quite different, but then again, I'm very picky, I don't want somebody where I have to micromanage their lives and make every choice for them. I want somebody who's very good at making choices that would please me and him, that's why they chose me and I chose them. No offense, but I get the feeling that you are really over-complicate the issue. Life can be amazingly simple and enjoyable.

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 5:18:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze a light bulb switched on when during a martial arts class the teacher talked about body language during a fight, how to avoid fights and appearing aggressive. If you carry yourself like you're afraid to be mugged and raped, a potential rapist will pick up those signals and it makes you a target. That doesn't mean that I would advise to walk through gang territory at night on your own, but just given "normal" situations like walking home from a pub or a bar. Rapists and muggers are looking for easy pickings. Yep, this is basic "street smarts 101".... I learnt early; that the best way of avoiding trouble is to show that you won't back down from it. Even the mighty lion, king of beasts etc seek out the frail, immature or injured when hunting. And it's bedtime.... Focus.

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 5:32:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze Focus, uhhhh, I hate to point out the obvious, but you know a guy having sex with a woman, I'd say in 99% of all cases he's not likely to quit prematurely out of his own free will, unless it's a premature ejaculation, stuff she could say during sex might have him wanting to quit like "Ooops, I'm not on the pill" or "Btw I got the results of the STD check..." but that would most likely result in him losing the horn. I don't know what kind of subs you met, but my experience is quite different, but then again, I'm very picky, I don't want somebody where I have to micromanage their lives and make every choice for them. I want somebody who's very good at making choices that would please me and him, that's why they chose me and I chose them. No offense, but I get the feeling that you are really over-complicate the issue. Life can be amazingly simple and enjoyable. Ok, one more.... I'm not offended 'cause you're reading things that aren't there. Vanilla or D/s, I've never been "a guy having sex with a woman". Hell, I'm waaaay too boring to ever have indulged in a one night stand etc. I've always been one half of a relationship, where the oops' and btw's have been mundane things. You don't have a mortgage on "picky" and I don't micromanage, either. And the type of sub I gravitate to are mature and capable adults in their own right. Lol, I have no idea where you're getting half this from - maybe I'll find out tomorrow night.... Focus.

LadyConstanze -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 5:49:44 AM)
I didn't get anything, I responded to posts you made, for example quote: And I've yet to meet a sub who was content making choices. As I said, never had this issue because for me maturity is being content to make choices and not expecting another person to make all the choices, maybe we define maturity different? Look, you wanted to know if we have issues with certain positions during sex, positions you perceive as submissive, most of the dommes here said they don't perceive them this way and why not. I'm explaining it from a female perspective, and I don't know if not having one night stands makes you boring, never had one, but never been accused of being boring in bed. You claim you have always been one half in a relationship where the problems have been over mundane things, but I think earlier you mentioned a massive fight with vanilla relationships when getting rough or grabbing their heads and forcing them a bit during a BJ - again, perspective, for me that wouldn't be a mundane thing AT ALL, that would be an instant "end of relationship and get out as long as your balls are still attached to your body" situation. That's the female perspective...

SexyBossyBBW -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/30/2011 11:41:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 That's the thing; you don't necessarily need what you never had. If women and Dommes don't have the brute strength relative to their male partners, and the vast majority don't, then they don't fuck that way.... So yeah, I was kinda curious as to how Dommes do adapt in that particular circumstance. Focus. Size and strength isn't anything to do with a particular sex act so much as attitude and how you like to do things. If you're naturally stronger than most, it tends to get utilised in your techniques, mostly without you realising it. For me, there have certainly been times during the throes of passion where I've had to be conscious of not hurting my girl. Which can be a bit tricky with a partner who likes it rough, herself.... Focus.That is when I've had the most fun.... Orgasm, or not. Getting him to submit to my desire to experiment, and being absolutely certain, I don't want to hurt him, when I know he likes to be overpowered/literally forced. When I am successful, he's too vulnerable, and I tend to back off... At least, until we discuss it, while he is conscious/of sound mind. M

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/31/2011 3:26:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze I didn't get anything, I responded to posts you made, for example quote: And I've yet to meet a sub who was content making choices. As I said, never had this issue because for me maturity is being content to make choices and not expecting another person to make all the choices, maybe we define maturity different? Look, you wanted to know if we have issues with certain positions during sex, positions you perceive as submissive, most of the dommes here said they don't perceive them this way and why not. I'm explaining it from a female perspective, and I don't know if not having one night stands makes you boring, never had one, but never been accused of being boring in bed. You claim you have always been one half in a relationship where the problems have been over mundane things, but I think earlier you mentioned a massive fight with vanilla relationships when getting rough or grabbing their heads and forcing them a bit during a BJ - again, perspective, for me that wouldn't be a mundane thing AT ALL, that would be an instant "end of relationship and get out as long as your balls are still attached to your body" situation. That's the female perspective... Ok, this is the kind of wordplay drama that teenagers concoct and contrive and I ain't playin...! I'm happy to have a mature and rational discussion with anyone here but it isn't a discussion if you're gonna stoop to applying rigid and literal definitions to otherwise harmless turns of phrase and "throw away" lines. So yes, my relationship problems were mostly of the mundane variety and yes, there were fights, too! That's too complicated or contradictory for you to grasp? An otherwise happy couple can't fall out or fight occasionally and still be happy and content within the relationship? You choose! You wanna continue discussing as adults do in trying to understand each other's view or are you gonna keep cycling with this passive/aggressive shit to the bush lawyer constantly trying to trick or trap the other with their own words? I'm always up for the former whereas the latter belongs in cheesy soap-operas.... Focus.

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/31/2011 3:58:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SexyBossyBBW That is when I've had the most fun.... Orgasm, or not. Getting him to submit to my desire to experiment, and being absolutely certain, I don't want to hurt him, when I know he likes to be overpowered/literally forced. When I am successful, he's too vulnerable, and I tend to back off... At least, until we discuss it, while he is conscious/of sound mind. M Yeah, good onya...! lol I got the impression you're smaller ("dainty"?) than your male sub anyway and likely not as strong physically. Ok, you can still hurt or injure a bigger/stronger sub who most likely wants to be physically overpowered but you'll just have to take my word for it that when a male Dom such as myself is much bigger and stronger than his fem/sub, there's a big degree of having to "handle with care" during complementing rough play. I'm older now and haven't lifted the big weights in 6-7 years but I'd just die if I inadvertantly hurt my girl doing things we both enjoy.... Focus.

SexyBossyBBW -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (5/31/2011 9:31:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 quote: ORIGINAL: SexyBossyBBW That is when I've had the most fun.... Orgasm, or not. Getting him to submit to my desire to experiment, and being absolutely certain, I don't want to hurt him, when I know he likes to be overpowered/literally forced. When I am successful, he's too vulnerable, and I tend to back off... At least, until we discuss it, while he is conscious/of sound mind. M Yeah, good onya...! lol I got the impression you're smaller ("dainty"?) than your male sub anyway and likely not as strong physically. Ok, you can still hurt or injure a bigger/stronger sub who most likely wants to be physically overpowered but you'll just have to take my word for it that when a male Dom such as myself is much bigger and stronger than his fem/sub, there's a big degree of having to "handle with care" during complementing rough play. Focus. Oh dear Focus... I am dainty, but I am not a petite flower. The above referenced situation, was a 6' tall gentleman, who weighed at least 50lbs less than I, in addition to his being in beautiful subspace. Him, I could doggy style, while in subspace; but he'd never agree to it, while conscious, so it's never happened, that I've done him doggy style. M

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (6/1/2011 5:16:39 AM)
Well that was fun.... lol Through all the defensive posturing and disruptive flak, I generally found the insight I sought and I'd like to especially thank those few Dommes who shared their thoughts and experiences in a positive and constructive manner. And thankyou, too, to the few submissives who dared to even participate in what is probably CM's most abrasive and hostile Forum, esp if you're not one of the sisterhood. Lol, it was certainly a jaw-dropping experience for me, too! Until next skirmish, Be well and take care, people.... [:)] Focus.

BonesFromAsh -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (6/1/2011 5:51:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 And thankyou, too, to the few submissives who dared to even participate in what is probably CM's most abrasive and hostile Forum, esp if you're not one of the sisterhood. Lol, it was certainly a jaw-dropping experience for me, too! [font] Obviously you've spent little time in P&R... [;)]

Focus50 -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (6/2/2011 4:13:30 AM)
Just once and only a week or two ago. Managed to inject myself between some Americans and their pet guns. Shoulda stuck to getting between brothers fighting - much safer place to be...! But bein' as how the CM site's main theme isn't anything to do with Politics or Religion, I'll stand by my comment on the 'Ask a Mistress' Forum in general. Focus.

WyldHrt -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (6/2/2011 1:12:32 PM)
quote: As to BJ's: women have TEETH. Teeth, not just for BJs anymore!

LadyConstanze -> RE: Dommes and Doggy-style. (6/2/2011 2:22:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 Just once and only a week or two ago. Managed to inject myself between some Americans and their pet guns. Shoulda stuck to getting between brothers fighting - much safer place to be...! But bein' as how the CM site's main theme isn't anything to do with Politics or Religion, I'll stand by my comment on the 'Ask a Mistress' Forum in general. Focus. Oh yes, we hail your bravery, have your medal to come here and ask women a question but then reject all the answers they give you because they don't fit into your agenda. We definitely need a man to tell us how we feel about things... Feel better now? Oh yes we are so abrasive, why don't we just bow down to your superior knowledge of what feels how to us... Not that we could decide for ourselves...

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