JstAnotherSub
Posts: 6174
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Interesting topic. My experience has been as follows. Once I figured out that I desire a D/s relationship, someone I had known for a long time turned out to be a domly type dude, much to my surprise. I had always respected him, but I guess, not even knowing what it was, I did not connect the dots. So, my first relationship pretty much fell in to my lap, and it was wonderful and showed me that I can never go back to vanilla. After that relationship ended, I got on-line and tried searching, mostly here on this site in fact. Frustration came quickly. Either they wanted to meet and fuck immediately, or they would chat a good while, then when time to meet rolled along, they went poof. I did meet a few from here, but, for one of us, the chemistry was just not there, and we wished each other well. After reading so much on here about "you have to get out and meet folks in real life", I ventured out in to the munch scene around here. I was terrified, but I figured wtf, it is at a restaurant and I can just get up and leave, if the need arises. I met many nice folks. Problem was, they were all "lifestyle" folks. After the munch, they would go to private play parties, and there was constant talk of what is happening at 1763 and other venues around town. Yay for them, that is their thing, and I have nothing against it, but it is not what I want. I am not seeking someone in the "lifestyle". I have no desires to go to 1763 or play parties. I have always been private about my relationship, and this does not change by adding the D/s element in to it. I gave up on meeting someone at a munch, and came back to online. I also have found ways of putting my sub side out to my "normal" friends, without offending, just in case they do know of someone they think I might click with. At the end of the day, I have found contentment in just living and enjoying life. I would love to find someone to share that with, but I honestly have no clue what else to do to find them, so I just live my life. I am turned off on munches, not because they harbor evil people, but because, in my experiences, they were people who I had nothing in common with. But, life is good, and it is wonderful to be approaching 50 and realizing that I am content, and that if I am "alone" for the rest of my life, meh, no big deal really. ETA, I do not feel like such a freak after reading the responses. I was so sure I would be the only person who felt this way. WHEW!!!!
< Message edited by JstAnotherSub -- 6/11/2011 11:26:35 AM >
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yep
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