ChatteParfaitt
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Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
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Thank you Lily for starting this thread. The topic is important for anyone interested in the origins of human sexual fantasy.
In order to differentiate it from actual rape, I call these consensual non consenting fantasies "ravishment" fantasies. It is my belief most females have them, and I would go so far as to say close to 100% of sexually sub females have ravishment fantasies. They are, in my mind, at the very heart of the dom/sub power exchange, regardless of the genders involved. (As LadyP pointed out, sexually dominant females have ravishment fantasies as well, with themselves as the aggressor.)
Where do these universal ravishment fantasies come from? It's my opinion they are hard wired into our brains. This is from Awareness, who, although I do not always agree with him, is capable of articulating the sexually dominant male perspective:
quote:
That's as far as I can go - the experience is foreign to me. I don't fantasise about rape at all. It's just not wired into me at any level. Rough, demanding use and abuse sex, yes. Actual violation of a woman who doesn't desire it, no.
From a sexually sub female point of view, I have to say the sex I enjoy best is when the male takes me and does exactly what he wants. It does not matter what he does, it can be slow and sensual, it can be hard and passionate. What gets me off is that I have no control over it.
I believe this kind of primal brain wiring is quite typical of sexually sub females. (Now add someone with a bit of masochism, and they would probably like it much rougher than I would. For me, it's all about CONTROL.)
That lack of control in the female and total control in the male is again, at the heart of all ravishment fantasies, and all the springboard for all sexual power exchange.
In exploring where this fantasy comes from, I point out that the first form of marriage was marriage by capture. Females were abducted from neighboring tribes as a basic method of acquiring a wife w/o committing incest. The female being in control of who she had sex with was not a consideration.
There is much written on the subject. Here's a (relatively) short overview from Wiki.
Bride kidnapping, also known as marriage by abduction or marriage by capture, is a practice throughout history and around the world in which a man abducts the woman he wishes to marry. Bride kidnapping still occurs in countries spanning Central Asia, the Caucasus region, and parts of Africa, and among peoples as diverse as the Hmong in southeast Asia, the Tzeltal in Mexico, and the Romani in Europe. In most countries, bride kidnapping is considered a sex crime, rather than a valid form of marriage. Some versions of it may also be seen as falling along the continuum between forced marriage and arranged marriage. The term is sometimes used to include not only abductions, but also elopements, in which a couple runs away together and seeks the consent of their parents later; these may be referred to as non-consensual and consensual abductions respectively. However, even when the practice is against the law, judicial enforcement remains lax, particularly in Kyrgyzstan and Chechnya. Bride kidnapping is distinguished from raptio in that the former refers to the abduction of one woman by one man (and his friends and relatives), and is still a widespread practice, whereas the latter refers to the large scale abduction of women by groups of men, possibly in a time of war (see also war rape). Some modern cultures maintain a symbolic kidnapping of the bride by the groom as part of the ritual and traditions surrounding a wedding, in a nod to the practice of bride kidnapping which may have figured in that culture's history. According to some sources, the honeymoon is a relic of marriage by capture, based on the practice of the husband going into hiding with his wife to avoid reprisals from her relatives, with the intention that the woman would be pregnant by the end of the month.[1]
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