RE: subs and slaves weight?

RE: subs and slaves weight? (Full Version)

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caitlyn -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/24/2006 3:33:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: agirl Not in response to any particular post.. In a text based arena it's easy to take apart a not brilliantly articulated post....especially if you ARE articulate and can express well that way. rose's Master hasn't come across particularly well but,as usual, as more information seeps through, the situation just isn't as first presented. rose has responded rather well, considering the amount of things she's tried to address on this thread. I'm not comfortable with some of the comments her Master has made....but stepping back and looking at the overall picture and reading posts of someone that knows them a little...a different perspective can be added .... It seems that in some cases people are hanging onto their stance come what may and despite anything else that's been added to the picture. There might be dubious expression in the first instance , but there's been a fair amount of it since, too. agirl The more I read your posts, the happier I am that you decided to start posting.

Chaingang -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/24/2006 3:38:43 PM)
kyraofMists: No, no, no - you've got it all wrong... The NEW transactional analysis states: "I'm not okay, you're not okay either" or possibly "I'm okay, you kinda suck!" [:D]

KatyLied -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/24/2006 3:42:13 PM)
quote: "I'm okay, you kinda suck!" Great sigline potential!

KnightofMists -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/24/2006 3:43:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Chaingang The NEW transactional analysis states: "I'm not okay, you're not okay either" or possibly "I'm okay, you kinda suck!" [:D] G well just doesn't kinda suck!! G.. she does!!! mmmmmmm now is that really a bad thing?

Level -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/24/2006 5:20:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: caitlyn quote: ORIGINAL: agirl Not in response to any particular post.. In a text based arena it's easy to take apart a not brilliantly articulated post....especially if you ARE articulate and can express well that way. rose's Master hasn't come across particularly well but,as usual, as more information seeps through, the situation just isn't as first presented. rose has responded rather well, considering the amount of things she's tried to address on this thread. I'm not comfortable with some of the comments her Master has made....but stepping back and looking at the overall picture and reading posts of someone that knows them a little...a different perspective can be added .... It seems that in some cases people are hanging onto their stance come what may and despite anything else that's been added to the picture. There might be dubious expression in the first instance , but there's been a fair amount of it since, too. agirl The more I read your posts, the happier I am that you decided to start posting. I second that, caitlyn, she is quite bright and adds to CM.

ZenDragoness -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/24/2006 8:10:28 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Chaingang quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania ... I have found Stoney is not that unusual in the men I have heard talk... unfortunate but true. That's like making the following statement: "He's pretty well behaved around African-Americans for a Klansman." snip Sometimes you walk on by. Other times you have to stand and fight or the sickness perpetuates itself and breeds further madness. Intolerance is like that. Elsewhere I have seen LordandMaster take down some people for being twits in exactly the same way. I swear to god, if he wasn't there doing it first I'd feel like I had to do it in his stead. And it's weird to whom it must be done or said. SirKenin has at times made very insightful comments - and then you see him talk nonsense about the stereotypical traits of Jewish people or the Chinese. It really pushed my buttons because I don't think SirKenin is actually a stupid man. But what gives with the stereotypes? You have these moments and say to yourself, "Whoa, when did this guy become such a dick?" And no, I am not perfect. Sometimes I'm just as much of a dick as anyone else. I get called out for it all the time. This is how we self-regulate: we shove each other around some and then it settles down. Everything's cool. Chaingang, as often i am quite taken by your Post. I second the whole text. ZD

zumala -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/24/2006 8:30:45 PM)
I've been keeping up with this thread for a while now, and haven't said much (actually, I'm not sure I've actually posted anything on this one prior to this post), but I will say this... I think the attacks should stop. I think the initial problem was simply poor word/sentence structure choice on Rose's part. That's nothing she has said that is worth stoning her over. She's stayed remarkably calm and polite, considering what some people have said to her. Ease off. She doesn't deserve what she's gotten from some folks. zuma

rose442 -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/24/2006 9:19:52 PM)
Thank you zuma. I do appreciate your help. rose442 juliaoceania you are the best... You don't know how much that post or posts meant to me. And I did not know how much you cared for me. It helped so much seeing that girl. You are the best sister one could have. Thanks to the ones who have tried to answer my questions and helped support me in this post. I will never forget it. And to the ones I offended, I do appologise. I was just trying to understand a little more about how the mind works. rose442

tamethetiger -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 1:08:51 AM)
It's as simple as this....you've decided that losing weight is the key to your happiness, that you will only be truly happy when you're thin. And you've gotten involved with a man who is backing up that belief. So you hate to see women who are fat enjoying their lives, because that disproves your theory that thin=happy. The reality of the situation, that your happiness is not dependent on your weight, is nibbling at the edges of your conciousness. In other words, "I'm unhappy because I'm fat, so therefore if I lose weight I'll be happy....so how dare they be happy when they're fat? That might mean that even if I lose weight, I'll STILL be unhappy!" It's great that you're trying to be physically healthy, but try working on the mental healthiness, too.

agirl -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 1:20:59 AM)
Thank you for your nice remarks caitlyn and Level. Regards, agirl

Kedikat -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 1:25:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tamethetiger It's as simple as this....you've decided that ( religion ) is the key to your happiness, that you will only be truly happy when you're ( saved ). And you've gotten involved with a ( group ) who is backing up that belief. So you hate to see ( people ) who are ( not religious ) enjoying their lives, because that disproves your theory that ( religion )=happy. The reality of the situation, that your happiness is not dependent on your ( religion ), is nibbling at the edges of your conciousness. In other words, "I'm unhappy because I'm ( not saved ), so therefore if I ( am saved ) I'll be happy....so how dare they be happy when they're ( aetheist ) That might mean that even if I ( am religious ), I'll STILL be unhappy!" It's great that you're trying to be physically healthy, but try working on the mental healthiness, too. I replaced a few words in the quote. Fat, weight etc... You could substitute various words/ideals. Like Democrat, Republican, rich, poor, vanilla, etc, etc......I agree and disagree a bit with the original quote.

MsMacComb -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 2:13:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: bigjohnson 11 percent...i am impressed. How long do you lift every day? I lift for 2 hours a day then I run 4 or 5 miles. The coolest thing about the 8 percent is that when I was a senior in high school playing football and basketball I had a 5 and a half percent. That has gone up with my workout for college football. I would like to hear about your workouts. Take care I was under the impression that only submersion tests were accurate for detecing BMI. I know that many people use the calipers and other versions but was always told that only one test was accurate.

maybemaybenot -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 5:02:02 AM)
As a general rule BMI is calculated by the following formula: weight in lbs X 703 divided by Height in inches squared . It may overestimate body fat in atheltes or understimate body fat in the elderly who have lost muscle mass. But it is the general rule and the formula used by dieticians and medical personal when planning diet, evaluating obesity or malnutrition, etc. mbmbn

GddssBella -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 5:56:02 AM)
G'morning all: Peeking in on this thread is sort of like a car wreck. You can't help yourself. It's up to 10 pages already. Jeez. Look, let's break this down to the basics. You have to be happy in whatever skin you're in. Whether it's a size 6, 16, or 26. Sometimes there are medical reasons why a person remains heavy. Live with it and be comfortable in your flesh. Personally, I'm zaftig and dieting/exercising my way down to a healthier weight. It takes time. Vanity aside, it's just something I go to do. When done slowly, the loss is more apt to remain permanent because better habits have been established. This hasn't affected my mental state. (or lack of, lol) I tend to be an upbeat, fairly well balanced person all around. Losing/gaining weight isn't going to improve how your brain works. You need to have a strong sense of self before you attempt anything. Especially in bdsm where the potential for harm has been multiplied. As to the OP's query as to why obesity is so prevalent in the alternative lifestyle? Look around you in the vanilla world. We're but a reflection of the current trends in America. I'm sure some ambitious poster can find the stats. Google wasn't being very cooperative for me this morning. My point? Address your insecurities separately from your weight. Your weight is but a side effect or symptom, not the cause. Your self esteem doesn't originate from what extra padding your body holds. It stems from within. Tackle that and watch how fast your other problems seem less momentous. Good luck rosie! [;)] Stay safe, play nice, & share your toys w/ others... [:D] Bella

MissArmageddon -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 10:15:50 AM)
Self Esteem issues can be seen in many different with many different body types. You can be overweight and supremely assertive and confident and like yourself, you can like yourself very much and be super confident although still want to lose weight - you can even be a muscular bird like me and get criticised by people that dont like "my look" and think that they have a devine right to say what they like to you about how they think you look. Its all seperate issues, self esteem, sub, dom, body dysmorphia etc etc and I dont beleive anything or anyone can be pigeon holed or should be. We are all wonderfuly complex and that is the beauty of each and every one of us.

Moloch -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 10:23:51 AM)
What were we talking about again?

genvieve -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 12:15:41 PM)
Ok, i have read a lot of emotional replies to this post, and i don't blame anyO/one at all. This is how i feel about weight as an issue in BDSM or in any relationship. Scenario 1: The submissive is overweight, feels unhealthy, has low self-esteem, wants to change but doesn't have the right motivation to do so. In this scenario, i think it's a wonderfully healthy thing to do to go to your Dominant and say, "Sir/Ma'am, help please?" This is very healthy. Not only does it allow for growth in the relationship...it's something they share as a couple. But please please please... anyone who is involved in this... don't attrubute your weight loss solely to your Dominant. This is called co-dependent. And if this happens, i worry that if the relationship breaks up, the submissive will no longer feel he or she can stay the weight they have acheived without the Dominant's help. Scenario 2: The submissive is overweight and doesn't have a problem with it. This submissive feels beautiful/handsome whatever just the way they are, but there are health issues. In this scenario, i believe it is the Dominant's job to help the submissive lose weight. Since it is a touchy issue, He or She may want to work out WITH the submissive... go on a diet WITH him or her... help them out, allow a support system. Scenario 3: The submissive is overweight, doesn't care, loves themselves, and there are no issues whatsoever. Fuck it, be open and honest about your weight...enjoy yourselves. i would say absolutely the same thing if it were the Dominant who was overweight.

rose442 -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 1:38:03 PM)
Peeking in on this thread is sort of like a car wreck. You can't help yourself. It's up to 10 pages already. Jeez. cant help but smile at this part GddssBella. When You wrote this, here were the thoughts that came to the mind... Jeez... Look at all the negitivity that come from these 10 pages. Jeez... Look at all the threads that have forked off of this 10 page thread. Jeez... But yes with this part I totally agree 100%. I only posted so I could understand the minds..... You have to be happy in whatever skin you're in. Whether it's a size 6, 16, or 26. Sometimes there are medical reasons why a person remains heavy. Live with it and be comfortable in your flesh. As to the OP's query as to why obesity is so prevalent in the alternative lifestyle? Look around you in the vanilla world. We're but a reflection of the current trends in America. Yes I do understand it is all around. In all different types of lifestyles. But when I was in 1 room with all BDSM'ers and there were wayyyy more overweight ppl there I was amazed. And I admit I had a perfect mental picture of "how I think it should be" As probably alot of Ppl did when first venturing into the scene. But like Wwe Aall should do, we learn it isn't always picture perfect. And everyone is different and should be loved no matter what. Good luck rosie Thank You GddssBella rose442

firstsub -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 3:24:25 PM)
i have seen many well perpotioned and beautiful subs as well as other BBw subs....personally i am ssbbw and yes i am collared. my Master tells me that submission is in the heart not in the body...... i'm sure the reason subs are over weights is as individual as the reasons any other people are over weight. it seems to bother you and your master more then it should. this lifestyle is about accepting each other and looking deeper then what the eye can see. if one can't get past what the physical appearance is....then your not with the right Dom or sub just my 2 cents

UtopianRanger -> RE: subs and slaves weight? (5/25/2006 9:38:39 PM)
quote: I was under the impression that only submersion tests were accurate for detecing BMI. I know that many people use the calipers and other versions but was always told that only one test was accurate. Actually, the ''skin fold'' test is extremely accurate, within one percent if it is administered properly. However, if you try administering it after someone has lifted, of course you'll come-up with a false reading. You're also likely to get false readings if the person tested is using supplements like amino acids/ creatine, which tend to ''bloat'' and add fictitious water weight. The average competitive body builder is probably in the 4-5 1/2 percent range. Same thing with an Olympic/wrestler /boxer /athlete Johnson : Had myself checked again, yesterday, and came up at 13 percent - But I have little extra water weight this time ; } - R

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