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HA!  You're just as clumsy as I am Zeph, admit it!! 

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ORIGINAL: IrishMist

I was about 14, running from the cops; looked back over my shoulder and ran head long into a stone wall. Knocked me out cold. Or the time my friends and I decided to go highway surfing and the driver thought it was funny to slam on the brakes. Or the time I jumped off this bridge into the river ( something we had done thousands of times before ), misjudged where I jumped and landed on rocks. Broke my leg in two places.
Everyone already knows about the time my late husband stabbed me.
There was another time that I walked through a glass door because I was so angry at him I forgot it was there.
Or the many times that I have had stitches in my hands because I got lost in the pain while pounding on a punching bag.

I have so many stupid incidents in my past

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Why was you runnen from the cops, Misty??

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ORIGINAL: IrishMist

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Why was you runnen from the cops, Misty??

Underage drinking, gun possession, loitering ( lol which actually covers a wide range of offenses )...AND, they had a warrant for my arrest for a previous gun possession that I umm, kind of forgot to show up in court for.

I was not a nice teenager

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ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

I was ironing. It was one of those older, really heavy irons, too. Set the iron on the board. Then bumped into the board.  Hot iron fell off the board, and landed on its (hot) edge right on the knuckle of my big toe.  I'm surprised I didn't break it.  Toe was huge, purple and burned.

Had to call into work and explain why I was late.

Another time I broiled a steak in the oven (under the broiler, of course).  Removed pan with steak from oven and set it on the stove.  Removed steak from pan and set it on a plate.  Decided to sautee some spinach and garlic.  Decided to use the pan that had just come out of the oven.  Gripped the handle.  3 hours later, my entire left hand was wrapped, Michael Jackson style, with 2nd degree burns (palm and all five fingers). 

Another time I was simply walking into the kitchen.  Because I'm a klutz, I spontaneously fell, knocking my elbow and then chin into the side of the counter.  Thankfully no body parts broke.  Thankfully, no one was there to witness it.

Most embarrassing was helping a former boss, who was the president of the company, at his computer. He needed some info that was on my computer so I rushed out of his office to get it.  I tripped over his computer bag and saiiiiiled through the air across his office, landing face down on the floor and slid into the wall, face first.  Body OK.  Ego broken.

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ORIGINAL: AdorkableAiley

This made me

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ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

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ORIGINAL: AdorkableAiley

This made me

Ha.  It's funny NOW!  It was truly humiliating at the time lol.  My boss jumped up out of his chair shouting "Oh my GOD are you OK????"  I got up as fast as I could and said "That didn't happen" and ran out of his office. 

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ORIGINAL: Termyn8or

FR

You really don't want to know.

T^T

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ORIGINAL: AdorkableAiley

I am actually thinking of one that had several co workers carrying me out and taking me to the hospital for xrays... lemme just say this, when going to get things to clean up spilled liquid it is best to walk AROUND not THROUGH said liquid spill because liquid on the floor is known to be slippery... DOH!

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ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

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ORIGINAL: AdorkableAiley

I am actually thinking of one that had several co workers carrying me out and taking me to the hospital for xrays... lemme just say this, when going to get things to clean up spilled liquid it is best to walk AROUND not THROUGH said liquid spill because liquid on the floor is known to be slippery... DOH!

OK why do the most humiliating injuries occur at work?

Just remembered, years ago, I went to the warehouse with our facilities manager.  As I was getting into the passenger seat of her car, a huge gust of wind blew, and slammed her door shut - on my head.  My head was seriously bonked between the frame of the car and the door, and I literally fell into the car in a painful daze.  She laughed her ass off until she realized I was actually hurt (big bump on both sides of my head) and we both laughed through my painful tears as she drove me back to the office.

I laid down because I was dizzy and the HR manager had to come fill out an injury report.  She was this really cute lady, from Egypt, with a very thick accent.  So I'm lying there and she says, in her massively thick Egyptian accent, "You have a hemotoba to the head?" at which point I burst out laughing all over again.

I ended up having to go to ER.  Because a car door slammed shut on my head.  My hemotoba to the head. 

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ORIGINAL: tiggerspoohbear

Once dislocated my shoulder when I coughed after swallowing friend rice and having it go down the wrong hole.

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ORIGINAL: poise

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ORIGINAL: tiggerspoohbear
Once dislocated my shoulder when I coughed after swallowing friend rice and having it go down the wrong hole.

Friend rice...is that what they call it these days?
This sounds like one heck of a kinky fun filled night!

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ORIGINAL: AdorkableAiley

I just remembered something that happened over 10 years ago at the first job I ever had on the books, I worked in a gorcery store and that day I was the one helping to put out the new shipment. I donned my apron proudly and took the box cutter... OPEN box cutter, from my coworker point first into my palm! X_x

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ORIGINAL: tiggerspoohbear

Riding my bike when I was about 15 or so, going past the lane of parked cars.  Idiot didn't look back before he opened his driver door.  I went flying over it and ended up in the middle of the street, lucky not to get run over.  Main St Ottawa is not the place to have that happen!