Why do you have to pay to serve?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Why do you have to pay to serve?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Why do you have to pay to serve?

Page: [1] 2 3 4 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 4:53:24 AM

Cummingsub

Posts: 1
Joined: 9/19/2011
Status: offline

I have noticed that just about every mistress on this site wants a future male subs to buy them things just to get noticed. Masters looking for female slaves do not ask for the females to buy them anything. Why is that?

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 4:56:07 AM

Delilya

Posts: 4108
Joined: 2/2/2011
Status: offline

Best not to worry over what others do. Skip them by and seek out what you are looking for.

_____________________________

“Love me without fear, trust me without questioning, need me without demanding, want me without restrictions, accept me without changes, desire me without inhibitions"-Dick Sutphen

(in reply to Cummingsub)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? (Georgia) - 10/18/2011 5:37:59 AM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

Hi CS,

There is profile and other netiquette help in the Ask A Mistress FAQ: http://www.collarchat.com/m_3057130/tm.htm

Your profile needs a lot of work. Start by killing this: "I have noticed all the dom ladies on here want money so if that's you just pass me over." The scammers won't respect it and you will alienate your target audience.

Perhaps your fellow Georgians will be along to recommend local BDSM events. If not, Google and FetLife are your friends.

Please take note:

DO NOT SEND MONEY TO OTHER USERS FOR ANY REASON!
Read about Common Scams and Online Safety Information

Welcome!

KK

(in reply to Cummingsub)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? (Georgia) - 10/18/2011 5:53:40 AM

LillyBoPeep

Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline

people do find happy relationships that aren't based on money, it's just that some people have realized that there is a bit of a supply-demand issue that could benefit them, and there ARE msubs who actually enjoy doing this. i don't understand it myself but to each their own.

if a pay-based relationship is not what you're looking for, then keep looking -- get away from the websites if possible and meet people in your community. i've never met a pay Domme in person, but i've met plenty of them online.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica

(in reply to kalikshama)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? (Georgia) - 10/18/2011 6:15:24 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

I used to give the guys that said this the hairy eyeball (sorry, zephy!) but then I changed my parameters on the other side to show me everyone in Michigan. Damned if they aren't right, there are VERY few of those red letter names, and at least 80% (purely an estimate) are of the $$$$$ variety. Which makes me sad, kind of, but also makes for the case of LEAVING THE DAMN HOUSE and going to pervy events.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 6:28:37 AM

HeatherMcLeather

Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline

Because your creepy screen name and very generic profile make it very obvious that you don't actually care about the woman you are supposedly going to serve. They are just faceless fetish delivery systems who deliver a service to you, so why shouldn't you pay them for that service.

(in reply to Cummingsub)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 6:59:59 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

*pssst, Heather....*

his nick reflects (at the least) the city he lives in.. yes, there IS a town in GA called Cumming..

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to HeatherMcLeather)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 7:06:58 AM

lizi

Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline

What you are seeing is the result of lots of men wanting a Mistress, and not all that many Mistresses around. You know how the cool toy at Christmas get snatched up by everyone in sight and then people start selling them on CL for astronomical prices just cuz they can, and people will buy them? There are a lot of people who saw the opportunity to make some money on places like this and they jumped on it. I don't think there is anything wrong with it, because as Lily pointed out, some men want that. However, men who want to bypass the monetary transactions tend to get frustrated with the lack of lifestyle Domme's out there.

That really can't be changed, there aren't many of them. There are tons more guys wanting to serve than there are women to serve. You're going to have to work at getting one if that's what you want. You got some great advice from the others on how to improve your odds.

(in reply to Cummingsub)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 7:19:10 AM

HeatherMcLeather

Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline

I know, and while the obvious joke in the town's name is tempting, it's not going to do his chances any good. Be honest, if you saw that name in your inbox would you really bother to check?

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 7:33:59 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather

I know, and while the obvious joke in the town's name is tempting, it's not going to do his chances any good. Be honest, if you saw that name in your inbox would you really bother to check?

yeah.. *I* would.. but I can fully understand that others wouldnt

(I've lived in GA for probably about 10 yrs, altogether, and had a friend from Cumming)

just wanted to make sure it was clear that the nick COULD ONLY be based on location.. not sayin it is...

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to HeatherMcLeather)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 7:37:49 AM

LillyBoPeep

Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline

there's a street in Omaha called Cuming; pronounced the same way, with a short "u", rather than "cyooming" as one "m" might suggest.
what would make me least likely to respond isn't the "Cumming" part, but the "sub" part. if i had a nice message written by someone called CummingDom, that name wouldn't bother me. that said, there ARE names that do bother me, names with references to "BBC" or other race-specific stuff, or names like "assdestoyer," i just ignore. =p

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Profile

Post #: 11

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 7:41:37 AM

HeatherMcLeather

Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline

Well there you go Cummingsub, Greedy doesn't find your nick creepy, and she doesn't charge either. Of course her owners are not so understanding and will require regular and generous tributes of Pounce.

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Profile

Post #: 12

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 7:44:21 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather

Well there you go Cummingsub, Greedy doesn't find your nick creepy, and she doesn't charge either. Of course her owners are not so understanding and will require regular and generous tributes of Pounce.

and catnip. must have catnip.

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to HeatherMcLeather)

Profile

Post #: 13

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 8:05:23 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I didn't find it creepy either, for what it's worth. I had a sub who lived in the town when I was located in Georgia. If you're looking at local people, they are more than aware of the name of the town, so I doubt it's going to be an issue.

Speaking of which, OP, you're in a great location for kink. Just a hop, skip, and a jump from several munches that are held various times throughout the month, one of the biggest BDSM clubs in the country, and some major multiple day events held through the year. You will see some pros at these, but not the type that you are referring to in your original post. Not the kind that ask you for money to talk to you, but the reputable folks who participate in the community and do sessions for fees. Actually, the big club in Atlanta is owned by a pro domme and there is a smaller club that is also owned by a pro who used to post here.

Point is, you are a stone's throw away from a vibrant BDSM community. Get yourself out there and meet some people.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Profile

Post #: 14

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 8:08:10 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

What, LEAVE THE HOUSE???? What a suggestion!!!

Yeah, I admit to being extra cunty these days, but really, in these days of the internet, if a person in a state that has a flourishing scene cannot find it? Well, then that's social darwinism in action.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to LadyPact)

Profile

Post #: 15

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 8:08:25 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

YAY!! I was hoping you'd chime in...

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Profile

Post #: 16

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 8:09:58 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

...or names like "assdestoyer," i just ignore. =p

That would bother me too, I am thinking that guy needs some serious help with his social skills, 'AssDestRoyer' would send a more powerful message, I should think.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)

Profile

Post #: 17

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 9:26:14 AM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cummingsub

Masters looking for female slaves do not ask for the females to buy them anything. Why is that?

They ask for blow jobs. Everyone gets paid somehow. Let's face it, dude... blow jobs last about 3 mins but Prada lasts forever.

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to Cummingsub)

Profile

Post #: 18

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 9:39:59 AM

HeatherMcLeather

Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline

quote:

Yeah, I admit to being extra cunty these days

Mmmmmm, cunty. That's my favorite fragrance.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Profile

Post #: 19

RE: Why do you have to pay to serve? - 10/18/2011 9:44:53 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

slut ;)

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to HeatherMcLeather)

Profile

Post #: 20