RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (Full Version)

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tazzygirl -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/24/2011 8:31:02 PM)

quote:

If i was a girl at that campus, i would not date any of the guys that belonged to that frat house... this guy could be any one of them.. I wonder how much it will cramp all their action..


The house is closed, how will they know who all the members are?




LafayetteLady -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/24/2011 9:34:58 PM)

Who knows?  Did the school and the national charter ban them from wearing any of the identifying greek gear?  Were they banned from changing to another house?  Are all the houses now being investigated?




tj444 -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/24/2011 10:23:17 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady
Who knows?  Did the school and the national charter ban them from wearing any of the identifying greek gear?  Were they banned from changing to another house?  Are all the houses now being investigated?

identifying greek gear? I dunno but it says every great UVM SigEp should have a great tie! or maybe from photos on their website or from newspaper articles on the frat/members.. perhaps from having met them before.. perhaps from asking girls that know guys to find out what frat they belong to.. maybe asking the guys outright and seeing their reaction (that might be interesting).. from going to one of their parties.. from classes at school.. These guys did not live in a bubble.. students know who they are, not all students of course,.. but the ones that they see at school regularly or at the bar or other hang out places..

One thing i have been pondering for a few days now.. how do i know that a guy doesnt have Sam's same attitude and viewpoint? How do i probe a guys mind to find that out.. subtly I mean, without arousing suspicion and being lied to... Even if it am perfectly safe, the idea of hanging out with a guy that thinks like that just squicks me out..




tazzygirl -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/24/2011 10:29:27 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

Who knows?  Did the school and the national charter ban them from wearing any of the identifying greek gear?  Were they banned from changing to another house?  Are all the houses now being investigated?


I wasnt arguing... just musing.




kalikshama -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/25/2011 10:19:29 AM)

quote:

how do i know that a guy doesnt have Sam's same attitude and viewpoint? How do i probe a guys mind to find that out.. subtly I mean, without arousing suspicion and being lied to... Even if it am perfectly safe, the idea of hanging out with a guy that thinks like that just squicks me out..


I'm assuming you mean how do you know that a guy will stop when you ask him to stop, which is a really important question, to which I do not know the answer.

I suppose as you get to know someone, things will naturally come up that can create frustration. How does he deal with it?

I canceled my first date with M because I had to work - he was understanding. For our second date, the restaurant we planned to go to was too crowded and noisy, no problem, we went to another one.

He lived with kinky people and having noisy, BDSM sex was ok. Twice they asked us to stop because the college age daughter was home. He was annoyed, but dealt with it.

I had every expectation that if I safe-worded, he would stop - and he has - with his prime concern being for me and not his dick. I may as well have thrown him into an ice cold shower as to have said "Red."







xxblushesxx -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/25/2011 10:38:14 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

quote:

how do i know that a guy doesnt have Sam's same attitude and viewpoint? How do i probe a guys mind to find that out.. subtly I mean, without arousing suspicion and being lied to... Even if it am perfectly safe, the idea of hanging out with a guy that thinks like that just squicks me out..


I'm assuming you mean how do you know that a guy will stop when you ask him to stop, which is a really important question, to which I do not know the answer.

I suppose as you get to know someone, things will naturally come up that can create frustration. How does he deal with it?

I canceled my first date with M because I hate to work - he was understanding. For our second date, the restaurant we planned to go to was too crowded and noisy, no problem, we went to another one.

He lived with kinky people and having noisy, BDSM sex was ok. Twice they asked us to stop because the college age daughter was home. He was annoyed, but dealt with it.

I had every expectation that if I safe-worded, he would stop - and he has - with his prime concern being for me and not his dick. I may as well have thrown him into an ice cold shower as to have said "Red."


Quoted for future readers to enjoy. [;)][:D][:D][:D]




kalikshama -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/25/2011 11:10:12 AM)

Hahahaha - HAD to work :)




LaTigresse -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/25/2011 11:25:45 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: tj444


quote:

ORIGINAL: xXLithiumXx
Honestly...No.

The question is now...where is the sense of ownership on the part of these boys?

If i was a girl at that campus, i would not date any of the guys that belonged to that frat house... this guy could be any one of them.. I wonder how much it will cramp all their action..


Based upon what I've seen with college kids..........not nearly enough.




FrostedFlake -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 6:34:59 AM)

Dueling research citations
http://www.musc.edu/vawprevention/research/sa.shtml

Numbers vary depending on source, but however you choose to look at it, there are less than 25,000 convictions annually. If the figure is 1,000,000, then that is one in forty. If the figure is 1,500,000 then that is one in sixty. If the figure is 2,334,700, then that is one in ninety three. I don't know what figure you would accede to be sufficient to to create an atmosphere of impunity. But I would like to point out that you don't get there by taking the number of convictions .....and then multiplying it by three or five and saying that THAT is how many crimes there were, because that is all you will admit of, and that BECAUSE of this particular computation (made by the guy with the axe to grind) anyone who says there were more crimes than that is wrong.

I only put it that way because that is that way I have seen it put, here, in an attempt to shout down the victims. And I want to go on a bit further about who the victims are. The victims are not merely the 1 in 6 American women who have been raped. They are also those who are going to be. And also those who fear that they are going to be. It would take a very thick skull indeed to fail to credit the notion that this includes more than 1/2 of the women in the country. Probably quite a bit more than half.

The crime committed by the members of Sigma Phi Epsilon at the university of Vermont is simply making a contribution to the problem instead of making a contribution to the solution. To those who say no crime has been committed, I can offer in rebuttal only : Jeeze! Whoa! And, Holy Crap!

What the fuck is up with these damned ITALICS? They keep coming back!

I could probably figure it out after I rest, but I had to read the thread to post this, so I probably could have said what I did a bit better.

Sorry about that.




kalikshama -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 8:33:42 AM)

To make the italics stop, close the tag - take the and move it to the proper location.




GreedyTop -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 9:27:31 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

quote:

If i was a girl at that campus, i would not date any of the guys that belonged to that frat house... this guy could be any one of them.. I wonder how much it will cramp all their action..


The house is closed, how will they know who all the members are?



nm..reread it..




LafayetteLady -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 10:33:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FrostedFlake

The victims are not merely the 1 in 6 American women who have been raped. They are also those who are going to be. And also those who fear that they are going to be. It would take a very thick skull indeed to fail to credit the notion that this includes more than 1/2 of the women in the country. Probably quite a bit more than half.



Realistically, every person on the planet is a *potential* victim.  Not simply women, but men and children.  Your statement implies that women should live having a "victim mentality" and that is just wrong.  I am not a victim.  I may or may not have been one in the past (which is my business, not this board's). 

I don't live my life in paranoia.  I don't do background checks on people I may meet on line (unless something rings *wrong* to me).  I don't have an unlisted number.  I don't readily give out my full name, phone number or address, but that is just being realistic.

What is appears you are promoting is that people, especially women, should be paranoid that every man they meet may be or is a rapist.  This is simply not true, and it is grossly unfair to men.  I understand what you seem to have experienced growing up and that my color your views on this.

However, women should not become paranoid because of these frat boys, or because men rape women.  Yes it happens.  Yes it happens far too often.  But rather than becoming paranoid, people should start using some common sense.  Don't get stupified drunk.  Don't put yourself in situations that are dangerous.  Take personal responsibility for your safety and don't rely on others to do it for you.

Yes people will be victims or be victimized even when they have taken every realistic precaution.  But if you live your life thinking you *are* a potential victim, you become one.




LaTigresse -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 11:17:30 AM)

Excellent post LL.

In my mind, if we live in constant fear then we've already let the assholes win.




angelikaJ -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 11:35:49 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

quote:

ORIGINAL: FrostedFlake

The victims are not merely the 1 in 6 American women who have been raped. They are also those who are going to be. And also those who fear that they are going to be. It would take a very thick skull indeed to fail to credit the notion that this includes more than 1/2 of the women in the country. Probably quite a bit more than half.



Realistically, every person on the planet is a *potential* victim.  Not simply women, but men and children.  Your statement implies that women should live having a "victim mentality" and that is just wrong.  I am not a victim.  I may or may not have been one in the past (which is my business, not this board's). 

I don't live my life in paranoia.  I don't do background checks on people I may meet on line (unless something rings *wrong* to me).  I don't have an unlisted number.  I don't readily give out my full name, phone number or address, but that is just being realistic.

What is appears you are promoting is that people, especially women, should be paranoid that every man they meet may be or is a rapist.  This is simply not true, and it is grossly unfair to men.  I understand what you seem to have experienced growing up and that my color your views on this.

However, women should not become paranoid because of these frat boys, or because men rape women.  Yes it happens.  Yes it happens far too often.  But rather than becoming paranoid, people should start using some common sense.  Don't get stupified drunk.  Don't put yourself in situations that are dangerous.  Take personal responsibility for your safety and don't rely on others to do it for you.

Yes people will be victims or be victimized even when they have taken every realistic precaution.  But if you live your life thinking you *are* a potential victim, you become one.


I don't see his post that way.

I can see how you do and your point is not invalid.

However, I see his post as pointing out that sexual violence affects everybody.
It isn't purely the victim's problem; it isn't her problem or his problem or their problem, it is everyone's problem.
It isn't an issue for just law enforcement and college campuses, feminist groups or think tanks; it is society's issue.

My Master has a lot of female friends.
The majority of them (so more than 50%) have been the victim of sexual violence at some point in their lives.

He brought up to me the other day that the percentage of Native American women who have been sexually assaulted isn't 1 in 5 or 6. It is 1 in 2 or 3 and this disparity isn't due to the large proportion of alcoholism on reservations because the perpetrators are usually white men.

This is everybody's problem, whether or not we choose to see it that way and whether or not we choose to be part of seeking a solution.




tj444 -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 12:10:34 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

quote:

how do i know that a guy doesnt have Sam's same attitude and viewpoint? How do i probe a guys mind to find that out.. subtly I mean, without arousing suspicion and being lied to... Even if it am perfectly safe, the idea of hanging out with a guy that thinks like that just squicks me out..


I'm assuming you mean how do you know that a guy will stop when you ask him to stop, which is a really important question, to which I do not know the answer.

Actually, no, its not a question about if i feel a guy will stop when i tell him to or if i feel safe with him.. it goes well beyond that and dating.. I dont want to even be platonic "friends" with a guy with that attitude or do business with such a person.. I dont want to be near someone like that at all, i dont want to reward him with my friendship, profit, wages, etc.. So i will continue to ponder that question, at some point the answer will come to me..




samboct -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 12:32:49 PM)

I'd suggest that anyone that agrees with FFs numbers- go watch Kubrick's A Clockwork Orange again to see what happens if he's right.


Sam




kalikshama -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 12:52:23 PM)

Finding rape fantasies hot and real rape abhorrent does not create dissonance for me and I am not ashamed to admit that I am aroused by the rape scenes in A Clockwork Orange. I suspect the same is not true for you.




samboct -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 1:30:12 PM)

Finding rape fantasies hot and real rape abhorrent does not create dissonance for me and I am not ashamed to admit that I am aroused by the rape scenes in A Clockwork Orange. I suspect the same is not true for you.

You are correct in that I didn't find the rape scenes in that movie particularly titillating, but that's not the point I was trying to make. It's what happens when a society decides that they can't afford to imprison criminals and what they resort to is what people need to think about.

Sam




tazzygirl -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 2:23:51 PM)

A novel idea.

Legalize pot, stop convicting the pot smokers, which are little more than a nuance crime, making lots of room for people who commit a sexual assault against women.




samboct -> RE: Name who you would like to rape on campus (12/26/2011 3:34:26 PM)

Let's see- can we match up posters with appropriate movies/books for their vision?

How about a Boy and his Dog for Tazzy?

And 1984 for TJ.

Anybody else got any ideas?

Sam




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