RE: Master does not want sex (Full Version)

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PolyIrishMiss -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 6:54:34 AM)

Damn it that was a long thread to read through, but wanted to comment on this. I recently ended a relationship with someone, despite having insanely strong chemistry, and an attraction to them that genuinely scared me sometimes with its intensity. And until the day before yesterday I wondered if I'd made a mistake. After two emails I now know for sure I really haven't made a mistake. She's a lovely girl, gorgeous, sexy, smart. But my frikkin Goddesses is she messed up, and not in "we can work on that" ways. More like "Ummmm I'm going to call someone about a straitjacket now, honestly it's for a kinky game we'll play later....*mummbles* called get me the fuck out of this!"

Thank frik I've reached a stage in my life where I can listen to my gut even when it screams the opposite to my heart, and not just walk when it says to, but run full tilt.

I guess relationships like the OP's (and frik nows I've had them, the best example being a bunny boiler from Texas, but that's a two bottles of Siberian vodka story) are what Mistress likes to call "What the fuck was I thinking?" lessons. As long as you learn from each of them and take away something positive then nothings a complete loss.

quote:

ORIGINAL: seababy

Then obviously he simply doesn't care about you except terms of your usefulness to him. Thats the bottom line isnt it?
He sounds like a narcissist.
Just because there is a strong attraction doesn't mean it a healthy or right relationship. The man I had the strongest attraction to in my life was completely toxic and I spent too many years in a soul crushing relationship thinking that such a strong attraction must mean something.





chatterbox24 -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:06:13 AM)

This Dom called my land phone cause I have not changed the number. It was the only way he could contact me now. I felt actually strong enough to talk to him because I am telling you I have felt a little pissed and very moronic over this whole 2 yr ordeal. I let him talk. I would like to share what he said for your entertainment purposes cause Im not going back to him. I have wasted enough time.

He said " I am not a text book Dom and you can not go by what you read or hear from some so called bsdm bible. I make my own rules, make my own script, my own world. I have been giving you what you need at this time not what you want. You were a mess mentally when i met you and now the TRUE ALPHA has helped to stabilize you. I have gave you my time which is what you needed, not sex. you needed to learn discipline and this is how you needed taught, not by getting your own way, as usual. I was prepping you mentally because to live in the Alphas world you must follow the rules, and you like to make your own rules and I have cared enough about you to want you in my world. You were not ready yet for physical domination because mentally you were not ready, and by the way you are acting you still are not ready. Until you learned to follow the rules EXACTLY the way I wanted them, and you couldnt, then you were not rewarded with what you wanted. WHen you realize that you will be back. I am a wise man"

I hung up. He didnt call back.





tameeks -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:08:59 AM)

Blah, blah blah, I am Alpha *chest beating*  blah blah blah. 


^^^^ Is this what you got out of it too?!




PolyIrishMiss -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:09:06 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: chatterbox24
"I am a wise man"




You sir, are a numpty.

Congratulations CB24 *hugs*




JanahX -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:15:43 AM)

Im gonna go with Awareness on the : dont get to get too deep into this shit. Cause Imma smellin it.

This last post she just threw out "quote by quote" was too much.




OsideGirl -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:16:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: chatterbox24


He said " I am not a text book Dom and you can not go by what you read or hear from some so called bsdm bible. I make my own rules, make my own script, my own world. I have been giving you what you need at this time not what you want. You were a mess mentally when i met you and now the TRUE ALPHA has helped to stabilize you. I have gave you my time which is what you needed, not sex. you needed to learn discipline and this is how you needed taught, not by getting your own way, as usual. I was prepping you mentally because to live in the Alphas world you must follow the rules, and you like to make your own rules and I have cared enough about you to want you in my world. You were not ready yet for physical domination because mentally you were not ready, and by the way you are acting you still are not ready. Until you learned to follow the rules EXACTLY the way I wanted them, and you couldnt, then you were not rewarded with what you wanted. WHen you realize that you will be back. I am a wise man"

I hung up. He didnt call back.




Okay, 1) There is no such thing as a "Text Book" Dom or a BDSM bible. Every relationship is different, but the key is....they're relationships. You did NOT have a relationship with this man. Relationships flow in both directions.

2) He refers to himself in the third person and by the title "True Alpha". Reminds me of a recording of Warren Jeffs where he talks about himself in the third person, but calls himself "The Prophet".

3) The whole thing is a big pile of steaming horse shit.


FYI, you can call the phone company and have his number blocked.




chatterbox24 -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:16:43 AM)

Blah blah blah .....talk talk talk.....come back for another couple yrs.....you will never get my rules right EVER....No sex for You! No reward for YOu! BUt for me MONEY< BLOWJOBS<GIFTS ...........weeeeeeeeeeeee

Ha! THats what I got out of that! ME not being right mentally to him is I prefer to have free will. I guess that is a mental defect.............NOT!




libraryladysub -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:18:32 AM)

Wow! what a long thread this turned out to be. A lot of good advice, and I wish that CM threads had "Like" options all along the way. Especially helpful is the mention of relationships being the same, BDSM or Vanilla--I, too, have mistakenly thought that somehow BDSM was unquestioning submission from the git-go, when that is something which is to be earned via learning to trust Someone explicitly. And if asking for clarity or mutuality is considered being obtrusive, then His version of being communicative is "My way or the highway" and the highway should be taken, because He is most probably not the One.

Another note: sometimes, very attractive people have learned to use their attractiveness "to get what they want". They rely on the fact that someone who considers themselves unattractive, or perhaps are unaware of their own loveliness but possessing low self-esteem, will be very grateful for ANY attention from them, even if it is one-sided-- such as Chatterbox's situation-- and not likely to leave even if the relationship is toxic. Especially if the underling person is one of those committed types--never give up, never say die, i can fix this--you know what i mean.

We can do better...we deserve better...no one as giving and devoted deserves to be a doormat. (I have to keep reminding myself of this, too.)

Thank you all for continuing this thread, even when it seemed to be "over"...because in the end, I learned even more that I needed to hear. Thank you, chatterbox, for communicating here...it became clearer as the thread continued to wind...that...

"There, but for the Grace..."

By the way...this in no way applies to my relationship with my One and Only Master--He is a wonderful loving Man, generous, kind...I still love and miss Him--it is just that I can relate to the OP (finally figured out what that meant), and could project the tendency in myself to have potentially fallen into such a relationship, at some time, were i not decidedly against pursuing another relationship. Thankfully, I am forewarned and well-armed, as there are those here who well-advise gentler creatures to be aware, and to value themselves.




JanahX -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:22:59 AM)

You made a mistake.




chatterbox24 -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:52:03 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX

Im gonna go with Awareness on the : dont get to get too deep into this shit. Cause Imma smellin it.

This last post she just threw out "quote by quote" was too much.


Alot of skepical people in the world! Maybe because they have ran into people like my EX DOM a few times....LOL!
THe quote was very similair to what he said on the phone, of course I was on the phone so I am sure it isnt EXACT.
ANyway I think its a good way to close this thread out, time for it to die. THe phonecall shows that they will come back and try to make it LIKE IT IS YOUR DEFECT of why you arent getting what you want. Dont fall for it. I know over time it will get easier........just like my smoking addiction was hell at first then got easier with time with quitting.

Hopefully Administration will close this THread now. THanks All and Safe Playing!




kalikshama -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:55:51 AM)

LOL, this is pretty much the exact tact my ex uses with his newest when she complains about the lack of sex.




kalikshama -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:57:52 AM)

quote:

Hopefully Administration will close this THread now. THanks All and Safe Playing!


Admin won't close it on request, but if you stop posting it will die off on its own. Do update, either here or via PM - I'm curious as to how it works out and wish you the best!




Iamsemisweet -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:59:43 AM)

Hmm. I don't share Janah or awareness's skepticism, but I do think it is bad form to trash your ex in such a manner. Jesus, supposedly you were in love with the guy a couple of weeks ago. He is what he is, the fact that you changed your mind doesn't change him. You have every right to walk away from a relationship that doesn't work for you, but this bitterness is very unattractive and unsympathetic. I don't want to hug you for your courage, I want to slap you for your douchery. Quit feeding off your anger and move on if that is what you have decided to do. Don't you have any girlfriends to hang out with?




chatterbox24 -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 7:59:55 AM)

Okay GIrl! I will do that. Take care. Letting it die now..............




alhamdullilah -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 8:24:12 AM)

*Spies the great Dark Steven and with a big bright smile replies...*

[:D]OXOXOXOXxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxOXOXOXO!!!




Awareness -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 11:48:57 AM)

  Oh God, can you people NOT flirt in private?  It's like junior fucking high in here.




kalikshama -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 11:57:13 AM)

/Bakes some cookies for Awareness/

[image]http://www.getsmile.com/luckandfortune/cookies.gif[/image]




wittynamehere -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 12:01:00 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: chatterbox24
he has never touched me. Not even a kiss. I dont think I can go without sex forever.

RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!




searching4mysir -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 12:12:58 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

/Bakes some cookies for Awareness/

[image]http://www.getsmile.com/luckandfortune/cookies.gif[/image]



Are those chocolate chips chopped up ex-lax. He seems a little...ummm....congested and might need a bit of relief.




Fornica -> RE: Master does not want sex (1/26/2012 1:00:52 PM)

For some reason, I totally pictured this post being said a la napoleon dynamite style, whilst kicking dirt with the toe of one's shoe.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness

  Oh God, can you people NOT flirt in private?  It's like junior fucking high in here.





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