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RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 4:25:57 PM   
BoxwineForBrunch


Posts: 184
Joined: 11/14/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: brder

It's been my experience here that submissives here often are looking for the one WHO DOES EVERYTHING FOR THEM. Is this really submission???...it seems more like vanilla world-- female domination to me than submission. I'm not saying I wouldn't do many things for a submissive I cared for, but I just don't have a feeling here that submission means submission.


well, for god's sake just remember, the problem is surely with everyone else and not with you.

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you have achieved success. but have you achieved success at success at success?

(in reply to brder)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 4:44:42 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Oh, theres a hell of alot of pillow princesses out there, sure.  Have em gargle your cock and kick em to the curb.



PillowPrincess!! That is SO my next screen name. LOVE YOU RON!!

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[page 23 girl]



(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 5:01:12 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
Well a few thoughts here:

1) You've made some generalizations. Not every woman in her 40s wants someone older than her. Matter of fact, most of my group of friends has always gone for someone close to own age. So, my suggestion is don't give up. Unless she specifically says she wants someone older, then go ahead and contact her.

2) A large group of women in their 20s still have the fairy tale deeply embedded. They meet some handsome, rich guy that saves them. They have unformed ideas of an adult relationship because they don't have the experience. The hot 20 year olds are dealing with guys that are tripping over themselves in an effort to win her over. In short, she'll develop "hot chick syndrome". So, chances are if you're in the 40 year old and above range, a lot of these 20 year olds are viewing you as a sugar daddy.

3) Your profile is flat out off putting. If I were looking, that profile would mean that I wouldn't even respond.

So, I think you need to take a step back, keep a positive attitude and keep trying.

_____________________________

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The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 5:13:17 PM   
kallisto


Posts: 1185
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Oh, theres a hell of alot of pillow princesses out there, sure.  Have em gargle your cock and kick em to the curb.



PillowPrincess!! That is SO my next screen name. LOVE YOU RON!!


Ohhh .. I was gonna use that too!!!! Now I'll have to come up with something else.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 5:26:08 PM   
BootyBoy


Posts: 108
Joined: 7/29/2008
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Well, to some degree it comes down to definitions, and on the other, it's that old question of "submissive ti whom?"

Most of the subs I know are not stamped with the same submissive mold in every aspect of life, and to every person they meet. If the giving of submission is truly a gift then it can't be freely given to every person who asks for it. Most subs tend to feel that they will give submission as part of a power DYNAMIC which is directed specifically to a Dominant partner within that dynamic—after a mutual agreement has been met. In other words, a sub doesn't get all "subby" until they find the right Dominant in the right situation. Until that happens, you shouldn't expect to necessarily see great evidence of their submissive souls.

(in reply to amaidiamond)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 5:29:16 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: brder

It's been my experience here that submissives here often are looking for the one WHO DOES EVERYTHING FOR THEM. Is this really submission???...it seems more like vanilla world-- female domination to me than submission. I'm not saying I wouldn't do many things for a submissive I cared for, but I just don't have a feeling here that submission means submission.


Maybe.... Maybe not... Frankly does it matter? I have my girls and we have a wonderful relationship that we three are all thriving in. I am thinking if it works with the person your involved with can see why it would matter about others.....

Oh that's right... There are some that are single and looking... Unfortunately some have trouble with finding their dream sub or Dom and blame it on the fish are not biting instead of the bait they are using.

Oh well. Sucks to be you

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to brder)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 7:24:10 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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OP, I'm submissive to one and one only. However, I certainly didn't give instant obedience on the first meet. I asked lots of questions for years as I learned who he was and what kind of a decision maker he was. Because this is my life I'm handing over and that means I have to pick someone incredibly competent to give that kind of authority to.

But nobody knows that on a first meet. You're expecting them to submit before they can trust you. You're expecting a first meet to be like someone who has been in a relationship for years. It doesn't work that way. Just like you don't compare a two week romance to a marriage of twenty years, and yet that's exactly what you're doing.

You want someone to submit totally, then you have to demonstrate that you totally deserve that. It isn't about the perks, it's about the responsibility. And your profile does not suggest in the least that you want or could handle that kind of responsibility. Owning an animal is a huge responsibility. You have to come home and walk and feed it on time, even when you would rather go out drinking with friends. Owning a human being is a hundred times more responsibility. You don't appear to be someone who could be a good owner.


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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 8:01:41 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: brder

It's been my experience here that submissives here often are looking for the one WHO DOES EVERYTHING FOR THEM. Is this really submission???...it seems more like vanilla world-- female domination to me than submission. I'm not saying I wouldn't do many things for a submissive I cared for, but I just don't have a feeling here that submission means submission.


I'm really not sure what anything means some days.  Coffee generally helps me with that.  I often feel like I am submissive to the Kings of Java. 

I will say, however, that I don't find temper tantrums terribly dominant.  But then that's my own point of view.  Obviously, your definition does include them.  To each their own.  Meh.


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Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to brder)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 8:04:03 PM   
MistressDarkArt


Posts: 5178
Status: offline
OP, dontcha just LOVE someone expecting you to provide for all her needs with nothing to offer in return? Welcome to our reality as female dominants, dude. We get wankers who expect us to be on-demand, drive-thru fetish delivery systems ALL the time. Why should it be any different for you?

+1 on the profile critique. There's nothing in there but whining. Not surprising you're getting the...ahem...replies you're getting. You can do better.

(in reply to brder)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 8:06:33 PM   
Kaliko


Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kallisto


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Oh, theres a hell of alot of pillow princesses out there, sure.  Have em gargle your cock and kick em to the curb.



PillowPrincess!! That is SO my next screen name. LOVE YOU RON!!


Ohhh .. I was gonna use that too!!!! Now I'll have to come up with something else.


You ladies can fight over PillowPrincess. Meanwhile, I'm walkin' away with CockGargler.

(in reply to kallisto)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 8:11:51 PM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
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Define "everything".

(in reply to brder)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 9:00:50 PM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: brder

Lizi - no, I just find that many submissives here want a "Master" who does everything for them...sometimes when I ask them up front and sometimes it comes out later after they 'commit'


Well that certainly sucks but to question whether the 1000's of submissives on cm are really submissive based on your personal experience seems a bit off.


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This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to brder)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 9:23:18 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline
You seem to think that because a person identifies as a submissive, that they should bend over for you because you identify yourself as Dominant. Many submissives I have met face to face have very dominant or bubbly personalities, that in no way makes them pushovers. Submission isnt given to titles, it's inspired, I daresay earned. If you believe that a woman of any age is going to drop her financial security, personal safety, family, friends, and panties because you made an account on CM, you will be sorely dissapointed. The way you worded your post reeks of a sexist entitlement attitude that only a very small nich of women are going to respond to. Most importantly, your idea of submission and probably your perception of dominance will not be compatible with many of your target audience. Instead of trying to define what a woman shouldn't be, work on ways to inspire them to please you. If you can inspire a woman to lust for your every whim, there is no effort she will not make to satisfy you.

_____________________________

Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to brder)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 9:27:45 PM   
SpiritedRadiance


Posts: 1341
Joined: 3/3/2010
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*falls down in lust to Endivius* What he said.... 

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"Theres nothing in life like the feeling of cool leather sliding over your skin, the tears that fill your eyes as you realize someone else thinks you deserve it even if you havent reached that conclusion yet"- Forever to remember 11/5/11

(in reply to Endivius)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 9:56:42 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
wait....he's supposed to do everything for me instead of the other way around????!!!!

Shit! No one told me that. Sigh. I've been wronged

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Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 10:00:31 PM   
SpiritedRadiance


Posts: 1341
Joined: 3/3/2010
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littlewonder-

Id pay to see you tell your Master, But no Sir your supposed to do the laundry....




_____________________________

"Theres nothing in life like the feeling of cool leather sliding over your skin, the tears that fill your eyes as you realize someone else thinks you deserve it even if you havent reached that conclusion yet"- Forever to remember 11/5/11

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 10:02:11 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
hahaha....he'd pay someone to see that too! I think he would look at me and wonder who I was. lol

Maybe I should give it a shot though huh? LOL


_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to SpiritedRadiance)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 10:06:28 PM   
SpiritedRadiance


Posts: 1341
Joined: 3/3/2010
Status: offline
Stranger things have been known to happen....He might just say,,, You know your right ill start a load, do you have anything you want to throw in?



_____________________________

"Theres nothing in life like the feeling of cool leather sliding over your skin, the tears that fill your eyes as you realize someone else thinks you deserve it even if you havent reached that conclusion yet"- Forever to remember 11/5/11

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 10:26:26 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SpiritedRadiance

*falls down in lust to Endivius* What he said.... 





_____________________________

Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to SpiritedRadiance)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Are the submissives here really submissive? - 2/1/2012 10:45:37 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Fornica

I think the last stat taken was that 17% defo are TRUE the rest are hookers, or men, or peanuts. It's a terrible, sad state of affairs.
And I disagree completely with Crazy up there, I think your profile will bring them to you in flocks.
FLOCKS.

Yuppers, take her word as gospel.  17% for reals, all the rest are some guy named Arpig with multiple accounts.

And I think your profile rocks dude. 


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-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.


(in reply to Fornica)
Profile   Post #: 60
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