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RE: Trying to get an honest answer - 3/7/2012 6:33:33 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

I know what I am about to ask will be a touchy subject, but I am honestly trying to get an honest answer as to why it is such a touchy subject and as I want the opinion of both D types and s types, this seemed like the best place to post this. Why whenver anyone posts about a D type trying to get his s type to lose weight does it become a vitriolic free for all. I don't understand it. To me, my body is not me, it is what I carry me (who I really am as a person) around in and although I don't like it much if someone says that I need to lose weight (which I do and am doing) I don't see it as a slam against who I am as a person, but rather a commentary on what my body looks like. I don't know if this makes any sense. With the way that I view D/s or M/s asking an s type to lose weight would be part of what is allowed in the dynamic. So I am trying to figure out why any time that subject gets touched on fur seems to fly.

Thanks in advance for your replies. It would be nice if they were pleasant ones (smiling)

heartfelt

I'm not well known for honest answers so, I think I'll just bow out on this.

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer about D mandated wei... - 3/7/2012 7:18:12 PM

graceadieu

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum
I got one word to say BULL SHIT so it's like 8 words. Of course many ppl with use that as a excuse <oh I must be a low responder> to keep from getting off there fat ass, to exercise and stop stuffing their face.

BadOne

I dunno, it makes sense to me. For the last 6 months, I ran 3 miles 2x/week in addition my usual 3x/week martial arts class and a reasonably healthy vegetarian diet, and no matter how much I tried I didn't lose one single pound and couldn't even get a 12-minute mile. (Edit: So it makes sense to me that some people are somehow predisposed to getting more or less result from exercising.)

Now, I personally wouldn't be torn up being told to try to lose a little weight. Heck, it'd be some good motivation for something I'd like to do (I'm a healthy weight now, but just barely). But, he better not mind me making nothing but fucking steamed vegetables and grilled tofu for dinner and counting every calorie because clearly exercise and trying to generally eat healthy just isn't cutting it!

< Message edited by graceadieu -- 3/7/2012 7:19:56 PM >

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer - 3/7/2012 7:37:23 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfelt sub

I think this is most people's reaction, thank you both for posting. And congratulations NV on all your hard work, you look fabulous.

Yeah... She does look hot doesn't she?.... But you know what is really hot. The effort and strength of character it took to change her weight issues. To me that makes her all the hotter!!!!

Oh damn... I all bothered now and the girls are out of reach until tomorrow night!

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer - 3/7/2012 8:22:46 PM

NuevaVida

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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfelt sub

I think this is most people's reaction, thank you both for posting. And congratulations NV on all your hard work, you look fabulous.

Yeah... She does look hot doesn't she?.... But you know what is really hot. The effort and strength of character it took to change her weight issues. To me that makes her all the hotter!!!!

Oh damn... I all bothered now and the girls are out of reach until tomorrow night!

LOL um...thanks both of you. ::blush::

But you see, it was more than weight issues that needed to change. It's a mental/emotional process. Which is why, Heartfelt, you see the strong reactions you do, when the topic in general comes up. Anyone can black-and-white the issue all they want. But as OsideGirl said, if someone has not dealt with obesity, and dealt with losing that obesity, they really can't relate to all the emotional layers that get buried underneath it all.

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer - 3/8/2012 12:11:20 AM

heartfeltsub

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NV, thanks for your reply. I do get that part of it, for quite a few years before I dealt with the sexual abuse of my childhood, I did everything I could to make myself as unattractive as possible because it felt safer, to the point that I know that I would sabotage things that were in my best interest out of fear.

Thank you again for your reply,
heartfelt

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Post #: 85

RE: Trying to get an honest answer about D mandated wei... - 3/8/2012 12:29:27 AM

MariaB

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum
I got one word to say BULL SHIT so it's like 8 words. Of course many ppl with use that as a excuse <oh I must be a low responder> to keep from getting off there fat ass, to exercise and stop stuffing their face.

BadOne

I have been trough periods in my life where I consumed large amounts of carbs, fats and sugar and didn't exercise but I never put weight on. Apart from when I was pregnant I have never weighed more than just over 100lb
People always say to me, 'its in your genes' or 'you have a fast metabolism' and I accept that. My paternal side were a skinny lot and very active, but what about when I'm a couch potato. Around 5 years ago my job involved me sitting on my ass all day and I was so addicted to this site at the time that when I got home from work I would take my computer to bed with me along with a bag full of edible goodies. Why didn't my body go to pieces? why didn't I put weight on and lose muscle tone?
I do believe my luck was up when it came to the gene pool. Its easy for me to take being slim and fit for granted and point a finger at others and say they eat too many cakes and don't exercise enough. Truth is they probably don't eat much more than I do but they have a lower metabolism and more of a tendency to put on weight.

American Academy of Health and Fitness
http://www.aahf.info/sec_news/section/aerobic-exercise-affects-genes_012507.htm

"Our study introduces a new complication - that is, it is possible that some people can't benefit from exercise as much as others, and these people may ultimately be at greater risk of developing cardiovascular disease," Timmons, a scientist at the Center for Genomics and Bioinformatics at the Karolinska Institute in Sweden, told Discovery News.

He added, "On a practical level, the low responders may simply have to invest much more time and effort training to gain the same benefits. This last point is, however, only speculation. The low-responders may always remain low-responders."

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer - 3/8/2012 12:35:11 AM

MrBukani

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I love FAT BITCHES, just sayin or writing it down gets me hard

.
A big ass and rack? I always have to look.
A belly tooooo big kinda puts me off I must admit. From a health POV but more so it just doesnt look good to me.
But look at it from a thin POV. Those flatchested girls just dont do it for me. Ass smaller then mine? Naww, not really my thing.
And guess what, fat people can loose weight and still have those lovely curves. The thin ones have to modify their body with plastic in order to look appealing to me.
The world is so unfair.

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer - 3/8/2012 4:57:56 AM

kalikshama

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quote:

I recently starting working with a personal trainer, who has pretty much mandated what I eat and how much I exercise. Oh, and he has completely forbidden drinking alcohol. Yes, I know I am paying him, and it isn't exactly like having your partner tell you to lose weight, but there are certainly some parallels. I trust him, he has educated himself, and what he says invariably works. Plus, he is absolutely a hunk and I want to impress him.

Works better than Weight Watchers, I will tell you that.

I, too, would trust someone with this much cred.

This approach would be a complete failure:

quote:

if you want to keep sucking this dick you might wanna drop a few lbs.

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer - 3/8/2012 5:20:37 AM

KnightofMists

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quote:

This approach would be a complete failure:

quote:

if you want to keep sucking this dick you might wanna drop a few lbs.

Not an approach I would use...... The few pounds are irrelevant to getting my dick sucked..... Besides... You do it right.. It can be a nice little work out and you will lose a few pounds. Win win!

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer - 3/8/2012 8:42:14 AM

GotSteel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub
So I am trying to figure out why any time that subject gets touched on fur seems to fly.

There are some people around here who are bitter about their morbid obesity. Not really surprising to find on an internet dating site when you think about it.

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer about D mandated wei... - 3/8/2012 2:43:09 PM

sirsholly

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quote:

I got one word to say BULL SHIT so it's like 8 words.

Um...BadOne......

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RE: Trying to get an honest answer - 3/8/2012 2:56:41 PM

sirsholly

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quote:

So I am trying to figure out why any time that subject gets touched on fur seems to fly.

FR

The weight issue goes both ways. I have a medical issue that is causing a bit of a weight loss. Ok...it caused a bit more than a bit.

Whereas the average polite person would never dream of going up to an over-weight person and saying "Damn...are you fat!!" they think nothing of commenting on my size.

But more hurtful than the comments of rude strangers are those from the ones who know what i have been dealing with. They would sever their tongue before they told a Chemo patient "You have lost enough hair, don't ya think?" or to one taking steroids or any other weight-adding medication "Damn...i think you are fat enough" yet..."You have lost too much weight" is something i hear all the time. Why in the fucking hell is this acceptable?

Irregardless of which way the scale tips, people are aware of their weight. If you don't like it, hush up and move on.

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