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RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/3/2006 8:19:59 PM

xxmstrchasxx

Posts: 423
Joined: 5/9/2006
Status: offline

I have had subs that didn't work outside the home but they did work inside the home and that was fine with me and at the time I could afford to care for them financially.

When I became disabled my sub started to work outside the home and helps me financially which really I feel bad about I guess.

I think there are double standards for the male sub in my view. I would think the male sub would work outside the home whether I could afford it or not and if I could afford a female sub not to work then that would be fine.

Just my personal opinion.

_____________________________

XxMasterChasxX

(in reply to Saint)

Post #: 21

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/3/2006 8:58:51 PM

Sirandlittle1

Posts: 538
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline

This says it all for me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: dincubus

There are two schools of thought here. One being that low income means one that would be seeking someone to take care of them. The other is that low income means that the person is trying their damnedest to make ends meet but have found themselves behin dthe proverbial 8 ball.
Both my submissive and myself are in just such a situation. We both work, we both attend college full time and we have kids. So we are busting our collective behinds to keep things in order. I personally believe, and i would also think that my submissive shares in my belief, that we would be considered under the second school of thought about low income.
In essence, I am saying that it is the person and how they act that would determine what school of thought about low income that they fall into.

(in reply to dincubus)

Post #: 22

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/3/2006 9:03:08 PM

MdmSarah

Posts: 32
Joined: 4/30/2006
Status: offline

I consider it very important whether a submissive is living up to their potential or not. That isn't measured financially, but I look for subs who are college educated, and pursuing a career they are passionate about rather than just having a job they punch in and out of.

I have a financially successful business and advanced degrees. I work hard. I'm not worried about "how much" a sub makes because I don't want or need their money, but I would not be compatable with someone who was lazy and barely able to keep a roof over his head.

(in reply to xxmstrchasxx)

Post #: 23

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/3/2006 11:12:53 PM

UtopianRanger

Posts: 3251
Status: offline

quote:

I consider it very important whether a submissive is living up to their potential or not.

Very good. I feel the exact same way about Dominant women. I like the ones who are ambitious and always trying to climb the ladder. No they don't need to be the second coming of Carly Fiorina, and no I don't need their cash {not remotely}, but I find a business-minded, ambitious lady living up to her potential extremely attractive.

- R

_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton

(in reply to MdmSarah)

Post #: 24

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 2:57:52 AM

mineva1slave

Posts: 9
Joined: 12/4/2005
Status: offline

good evning Aall
there may also be the reason that Ssome are just as happy to grow Ttheir own food,live off the land etc,and find that the rat race Wwe call society and the money needed to be a part of it is not for Tthem.
girl actually applaudes Aanyone capable and corageous enuff to do so.Tthey mite even be the smart Oones the way these wars etc are heading.hm just a thought...
Then again,,there are those pesky lil * the world owes me a living folk * also.lol.but Tthey are for another topic,
respect and huggs

(in reply to Saint)

Post #: 25

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 3:28:48 AM

ExistentialSteel

Posts: 676
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline

Mineva1slave makes a good point, but even that ties in to my view. It is not how much money you make, but it is the industrious, competent and self-reliant attitude I admire. You may be growing your own food to live on and that is fine with me as long as you do it well. I mean get out there and weed that garden.

Money is only one indicator of success. I am successful enough by doing it the traditional way, but many people dedicate themselves to things that often don’t pay much. Teachers come to mind. A mother raising kids is another.

I don’t care if you are a communist who believes everything should be shared equally as long as you are a hardworking and competent communist, enthusiastic about your goals. Self-reliance and enthusiasm in whatever you undertake are what attract me.

_____________________________

For those who are like Roman Candles leaving bright trails in the night sky while the crowd watches until the dark blue center light bursts into magnificent colors and the crowd goes, ahhhhhhhhhh.

(in reply to mineva1slave)

Post #: 26

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 3:57:54 AM

littlesarbonn

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline

There's an interesting sidebar to the whole "low income submissive" thing, and that's about the subject of relocation. Quite a few times a woman has contacted me and asked me if I'm willing to relocate (quite often that's ALL they say, which goes back to my pet peeve that women want more than one word contacts from subs, yet it seems okay when I get those from women, but that's another story for another time).

Now, right at this moment, I make a very decent income. Granted, I'm not about to knock Bill Gates off the Forbes list by any stretch of the imagination, but I've hit a point where I don't have much fear of poverty these days. When women contact me about relocation, they usually know I'm doing okay financially, and somehow that has an expectation that when I move across the country or to wherever, suddenly that income moves with me. Unfortunately, that's probably not going to be the case, and it's probably the one reason I haven't moved out of this crappy area I live in (crappy for lack of bdsm interactivity or community). But I'm constantly asked if I'm willing to relocate, and when I respond that it would be possible if I was able to find employment in that area, the contact kind of goes dry, leaving me wondering if they're really all that serious when they contact me in the first place.

This whole money fascination with people in the scene (and I guess out of it as well) often turns me off of even looking for a partner. I hate the very concept of money itself, seeing it as a bartering necessity but not as a factor that makes up my self. This is why I rarely even answer a question of someone in the way they want when the first comment of small talk is "what do you do for a living?" My answers are usually "breathe" or "enjoy every moment I've got." People spend way too much time identifying themselves by their occupation and income level. This hatred of such distinctions is probably the reason I'll never find anyone. Every now and then someone tells me she feels this exact same way and then superficialities emerge, and it's like I'm alone again.

< Message edited by littlesarbonn -- 6/4/2006 4:21:02 AM >

(in reply to Saint)

Post #: 27

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 4:14:38 AM

enigmaslave

Posts: 146
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline

Cudos to you.
Well thought out,
Well articulated,
and i agrea with all points, (includeding those not related to the topic.)
There does seem to be a double standard and an invisable minimum, or as you say, they're really not serious.

_____________________________

my appreciation to A/all who have read my opinion.
enigmaslave

slrn 000145067

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

Post #: 28

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 4:39:14 AM

LTRsubNW

Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline

I've always been of the opinion that if a Domme has the financial capacity to take care of me in the style I've become accustomed to, she's A-OK with me.

(On with golf!!!)

(in reply to Saint)

Post #: 29

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 5:02:44 AM

becca333

Posts: 1050
Joined: 4/11/2006
Status: offline

How much you earn isn't important, what counts is that you're working in some way - paid or voluntary work, working or studying, making a contribution. It's not about money, it's about having pride in yourself, and in being an active part of society.

A lot of the jobs that are really important pay far less than jobs that don't add much to society as a whole - one day we'll live in a world where jobs like nursing, police, paramedics, teachers and firemen are paid more than models, sportsmen and rock stars.

Okay, okay - but I can dream.

(in reply to LTRsubNW)

Post #: 30

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 5:22:32 AM

openmindedslave

Posts: 470
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline

I can see in all fairness a side that may sound a little cold , but I do know exist in many relationships. The fact is money or what you can do with it can be a deciding factor for amny a relationship. Careers that a sub is asssoicated with ? The type of home life you may be able to experience together? The places or experiences who may want to treasure throught your life in many ways will be determined by the amount of money you have through life.

I was speaking to a woman ( in the vanilla lifestyle) the other day who said that she saw that the man she would settle down with would need to afford her a certain lifestyle. As a carreer woman herself, she wanted a person who appreciated education and had a drive to succeed. Now take that to the submissive levels. Say you have met a couple of very good subs , who really met most of your needs and wants. Pretty close to age for both but you only want a life with just one. Somewhere in validating them, you would compare then to one another. Appearance , ..desire to please.. Similar interest.. Intelligence..Income...etc. Whether we say money or income, in a sense money does play into how some people will judge us. NOT ALL PEOPLE WILL DO THIS. So if a dom enjoys taking 3 weeks ayear of vacations or having a summer home at her favorite beach...or just enjoys being able to have more economic freedom than her sole income can attain, then it might be a reasonable view for some to look at a subs income potential before a long term committment is made.

But in all of this, is still comes down to a connection one makes with each other. To validate a persons submissiveness by income only is not going to last for either of them involved . Toys and trips and a big house will not fullfill most people for long if thats alll there really is to bring everyone together

(in reply to Rayne58)

Post #: 31

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 6:41:57 AM

bignipples2share

Posts: 611
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

Edited to say, I used quick reply

I'd prefer someone who is financially secure in their own right. I have no desire to support someone, or be supported. If I make more than they do, my gifts to them may be bigger, or if they make more, their gifts may be bigger. He may have enough money to wisk me off to Europe for the weekend, while I can only wisk him to a great meal and theatre in the next county over, or visa versa. Just something more than a special trip to McDonalds. LOL
I would not be a person in any rush to move in with someone or have them move in with me, or share expenses. At this point in my life, I'm not into investing money in property that is not mine. More likely, half the time we'd be at his place, the other half at mine, therefore, he pays his stuff, I pay mine.
There would have to be alot of history in the relationship and many discussions for that to change.

~Big

____________________
ahhhh I see sounds

< Message edited by bignipples2share -- 6/4/2006 6:43:22 AM >

(in reply to openmindedslave)

Post #: 32

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 7:02:20 AM

indybbwsubbie

Posts: 51
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

For the longest time - i kept getting turned down by Doms cuz i had my own home and a stable job. Seems that they were always looking for those who are homeless and jobless - who could relocate at the Master's snap of a finger.

Then the one who loved the idea of my being a homeowner and being capable of handling finances well. Of course - he ended up being a dom wannabe - and only looking for someone who was stronger and more capable than himself. A healthy dose of reality sunk in before we made that trip down the aisle and i would have been stuck with a really bad situation!

i've never been looking for a Dom as a meal ticket - but one who is strong and capable in His own right.

blessings to all -
indy subbie

(in reply to bignipples2share)

Post #: 33

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 7:38:19 AM

scifisub42

Posts: 22
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Are you sure that it's the low income subs that attract the doms, or maybe it's that the low income subs are more likely to be attracted to a dominant with money? (perhaps a 'sugar daddy'?)

I expect a dominant to have a stable, steady income, and preferably to have one large enough to support us both if something should happen to my job. Two OK jobs means you live in a nice big boat with two liferafts. I don't intend to give up working, but under the right circumstances, I'd love to be able to pursue my art full or part time. I don't need a billionaire, just someone who is stable, if you have someone who can't hold a job, doesn't that indicate that the person isn't in control of themselves? (it's a warning sign if they keep losing jobs and it's NEVER their fault)

I keep running into bum Dominants. It would seem that if they indicate that they will relocate it means that they have a crappy job, or NO job, (sorry, no SSI here)... I've seen this happen in a married couple, and I will NOT support a bum! She gave up Chef school without getting her Chef rating to keep them afloat because he kept losing jobs. So she gave up her possible chance to earn good money to make enough to survive all because he was an idiot.

scifi

(in reply to indybbwsubbie)

Post #: 34

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 7:59:45 AM

pinkee

Posts: 487
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Littlepita

I’m very blessed that I have a Dom that was willing to take on the financial responsibilities for my daughter and me. When we met, I did have a job and I was heavily in debt. I saved my money and paid for my divorce and made sure hubby took the debt over. My Dom then took over the financial obligation of my daughter and myself.

Right now, I’m working on getting my GED and will start college classes in the fall. I will go to school for the next two years and he will support me. I hope to start my own business after school and he will help me do that.

Yeah sometimes, I feel guilty that he does so much in the way of financial support. However, he has told me repeatedly how good he feels about being able to help me start over in my life and achieve my dreams. He has the means to do it and he has the will. I am very grateful to him and in time, I hope to be successful and contribute fully. Right now, this works for us.

You go girl. i admire your ambition and desire to better yourself.

pinkee

(in reply to Littlepita)

Post #: 35

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 8:30:42 AM

openmindedslave

Posts: 470
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline

I did see one dom who clearly said she wanted her sub/slave to be in a blue collar or service sector job. She figured that the main income was hers and becasue her carreer would be the main provider , she did not want a sub with a demanding carreer that would take time form her life.

(in reply to pinkee)

Post #: 36

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 9:21:12 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

I find the talk about low/high income dom or sub to be amusing. It defines a bigger problem regardless of what side of the economic scale you find yourself. It points to prejudice and/or envy regardless of any biblically provided rationalization. Because the bottom line is this; you can't be sub, dom, slave, master without a counterpart. It requires some form of relationship. The economics of the individuals become the combined economics of the relationship. Concern about who brings what to the table only serves as a distraction. Economic reality is reality, it needs to be addressed, but only pragmatically as to how it relates to the relationship goals. Personal goals need to be considered when committing to the relationship. Accountability and responsibility need to be openly addressed. Consideration for all economic concerns is as critical as physical limits. But once there is a relationship the income/assets don't have an individual in possession.

beth has everything I have, and I have everything of hers. It matters not who brought what to the table. We are living in the manner we chose because WE can. Not because I can or SHE can. Together we live this way.

You need not point out to either of us the 'fact' that the majority of relationship end in failure. The 'pre-nup' or accounting for a non-working sub/slave in the event of the relationship failing may be logical and pragmatic, but it is also self-fulfilling prophecy. We chose to plan for success, but maybe not for the reason you would think. We both came from pasts where people we trusted enough to marry broke that trust. Coincidently, we both gave them everything gained in that relationship just to be rid of them. They ended up being much more miserable with the material possessions then either of us did starting all over from scratch. It comes down to what's important to you, and what level or priority you assign your relationship versus your personal economics.

If you bring or require a personal financial statement when you meet someone; you've set your priority. I guess if you both have that priority you've found your relationship mate. Better to honestly disclose goals, have a realistic plan in mind to achieve them, and then work together to do so.

A relationship has two "I's" only as a word. To work it combines the two, neither one as a capital, whether referring to the case of the letter or fiscal 'capital'.

(in reply to openmindedslave)

Post #: 37

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 10:23:22 AM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

This is so similar to the thread regarding low imcome dominants.... To answer the question from the perspective of House Iron Bear, Let us assume that you match the requirements o as stipulated in mt Profile and echoed in that of Lady Neets, you would know that for a time you would need to be self supporting at least untill such time that we decided to look as 24/7 live in.... You could be sharing accomodation which would not be a problem as you wopuld be spending quite a piece of time here with us anyway. If you were living with us, you need to be able to cover your personal bills and costs. As we can cover all our own basics here what you would need to contribute to would be the excess phone, power, gas and internet bills as well as one third of the food bill... In other words your cost of living.. Should our personal income increase to a point where I copuld cover all those things then you would be no longer required to help out... Simple isn't it. After all the person is what we are looking at rather than the income....

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 38

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 10:32:53 AM

MasterR001

Posts: 76
Joined: 3/10/2006
Status: offline

A subs income has noting to do with thier submissiveness. One can have a wonderful session with a sub and that has nothing to do with what she deos for a living. However, a couple of times I had women pay me for my services becaues they felt it would add to their humiliation- I'll admit that did add to my pleasure as well. Not the money, the idea.

(in reply to Rayne58)

Post #: 39

RE: Low Income Submissives - 6/4/2006 11:45:19 AM

Sumimara

Posts: 10
Joined: 4/27/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline

My second post!!

Iron Bear: I am having fun reading your posts.
Fergus: My goodness you are yummy!

Onto the subject at hand - The sub/slave income.

I think that everyone should live up to their potential, that a responsible person is a responsible whether they are barely making ends meet or they are making 6+ figures. I am thankfully in a position where what my (IF I EVER FIND HER) slave's financial situation is really has no bearing on the relationship. EXCEPT in the sense that it will give me a good indication of how responsible a person she is. As I stated in the Low Income Dom thread, it is not what a person has but how they manage what they do have.

My lifestyle makes one of my requirements a woman who is not going to work outside of my home; and as a responsible person I understand that the requirement comes with responsibilities - things like health insurance, and providing for her future. However, I am not interested in becoming a sugar mommy to a creature who cannot handle her own life and is looking for a place to flop - so for me it is important that the woman I become involved with is with me not for what I can provide but because she wants to be. Seems very tricky but in the end, people who have laid ruin to their lives (no matter their orientation) cannot escape the evidence of their irresponsibility (yes, things happen and there are exceptions), but in the end patterns of behavior are a good indicator.

I'm off to read other posts - Damn these sunny Atlanta afternoons!!!

_____________________________

"I refuse to live in the ordinary world as ordinary women. To enter ordinary relationships. I want ecstasy. I will not adjust myself to the world. I am adjusted to myself."- Anais Nin

(in reply to MasterR001)

Post #: 40

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