RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost?

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PurePleasure2 -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 2:24:45 PM)
Have a yard/garage/tag sale. You make a few dollars, and those unneeded items find a home where they may be put to use. Use the extra money to pay for a deep cleaning house cleaning. Win-win in my book. quote: ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom I have about 10 45 gallon packers still out in storage to this day, full of stuff from when Daddy and i packed it to move from my moms house to the garage cottage behind my moms house, and a lot of my belongings i just couldn't deal with and 99 percent of his stuff he had with him when he moved to live with my family and i, are still in storage in the workshop behind us. Thankfully he didn't come with very much. 3 of those packers are my books and his movies and dvd's cause i was re organizing an wanted to move furniture so i packed up his movies, and my books got packed up cause when i moved rooms they had to be packed an now i have no place for them, not really. I'd love to find a handy sollution other than get rid of them. To be fair a lot of my stuff was craft stuff, fabric, stuff like that an i finally did go through and organize and gave away a lot of stuff, it was really hard to get rid of, i have held onto stuff for so long, decided i didn't need it an then got rid of it an in like 2 weeks needed it. but there's still a shit load of stuff in my room and our storage unit that needs dealt with. I really need him to help me more, and we're working on that, but most the time he's useless when it comes to getting him to help me clean house, or help me sort things, or deal with all the crap we chucked into storage cause we couldn't deal with it, but I am going through stuff an getting rid of it slowly at least.

kalikshama -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 4:09:04 PM)
quote: Teach yourself this very simple rule: you're expected to put in as many hours of housework and cooking as he is putting into working. So if he works 8 hours, you do 8 hours of cooking and housework. After you both have worked an EQUAL amount of time, all housework beyond that gets split in half and he has to help do it. I guarantee you that your house will have never been as spotless before, because there is just no fucking way that you can clean 8 hours a day and have ANYTHING left for him to help with when he comes home. You're nagging and complaining about him not lifting a finger to help, but in reality its you who isn't doing your fair share. You're expecting him to work 8 hours a day + help out an hour a day + travel to and from work = him spending at least 9 hours or more a day WORKING; while you do an hour of housework (if that) and then expect him to do half? Disregarding cooking and cleaning up after, I doubt I spend more than 30 minutes per day on housework, so yes - 8 hours per day = spotlessness, especially since there are no children.

Ishtarr -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 5:05:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kalikshama quote: Teach yourself this very simple rule: you're expected to put in as many hours of housework and cooking as he is putting into working. So if he works 8 hours, you do 8 hours of cooking and housework. After you both have worked an EQUAL amount of time, all housework beyond that gets split in half and he has to help do it. I guarantee you that your house will have never been as spotless before, because there is just no fucking way that you can clean 8 hours a day and have ANYTHING left for him to help with when he comes home. You're nagging and complaining about him not lifting a finger to help, but in reality its you who isn't doing your fair share. You're expecting him to work 8 hours a day + help out an hour a day + travel to and from work = him spending at least 9 hours or more a day WORKING; while you do an hour of housework (if that) and then expect him to do half? Disregarding cooking and cleaning up after, I doubt I spend more than 30 minutes per day on housework, so yes - 8 hours per day = spotlessness, especially since there are no children. Exactly the reason why it's just disgusting that she's complaining about her partner not helping, and even more disgusting that she even expects him to help. If she does an ABSOLUTE maximum of 1 hour of cleaning a day and 1 hour of cooking/food shopping a day, they will eat nothing but home cooked meals, home baked breads and baked goods, home made deserts... all made from scratch. And the house will be clean enough that one could eat off the toilet seat so to speak. And that's WITH her picking up after him and taking his dishes to the kitchen as she takes her, and so on... So if she puts in a MERE 2 hours of effort, EVERYTHING will be done to perfection, he wouldn't have to life a finger AND he'd still spend 6 MORE hours a day working than she does. The fact that she expects him to go out and work AND then come home and help her while she hasn't even put in a mere couple hours of work is just beyond disgusting, and the fact that there are people here telling her she's right and that he should help is just disturbing. If there is anything left to do after she's put in an honest day work she can ask and expect him to help, but she doesn't even bother for 1 single day to put in as much effort in their household as he does.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 5:16:17 PM)
Said household...is part of TFTB's parent's property, BTW. And I do not think i t unreasonable that an adult throw away their own trash.

calamitysandra -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 5:17:57 PM)
Now, while I do agree with the gist of your post Ishtarr, and I, too, believe that the majority of the houswork should be done by her in this case, I still believe that if her partner goes out of his way to be a slob, doing things like leaving a spill or dropping his stuff where he stands, that he should be held responsible for this mess. But yes, you are right. He works 8 hours, she sits at home. Fairness dictates that she should be doing the housework. With a place as tiny as the one they are living in she should still retain quite a lot of free time while doing so.

angelikaJ -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 5:33:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Ishtarr Exactly the reason why it's just disgusting that she's complaining about her partner not helping, and even more disgusting that she even expects him to help. If she does an ABSOLUTE maximum of 1 hour of cleaning a day and 1 hour of cooking/food shopping a day, they will eat nothing but home cooked meals, home baked breads and baked goods, home made deserts... all made from scratch. And the house will be clean enough that one could eat off the toilet seat so to speak. And that's WITH her picking up after him and taking his dishes to the kitchen as she takes her, and so on... So if she puts in a MERE 2 hours of effort, EVERYTHING will be done to perfection, he wouldn't have to life a finger AND he'd still spend 6 MORE hours a day working than she does. The fact that she expects him to go out and work AND then come home and help her while she hasn't even put in a mere couple hours of work is just beyond disgusting, and the fact that there are people here telling her she's right and that he should help is just disturbing. If there is anything left to do after she's put in an honest day work she can ask and expect him to help, but she doesn't even bother for 1 single day to put in as much effort in their household as he does. Said household is also a very small space; I believe they are living in the garage. I am sorry, I guess in your world the cooking and cleaning up after must be done by sprites. When I cook from scratch I can easily count on one hour of cooking time for dinner (I don't have a food processor not a fancy chopping thing and so all of that is done by hand) and an hour of clean up and that is if I don't bake. Daily cleaning (if one is caught up) shouldn't take much more than an hour but if one is overwhelmed or struggles with disorganisation then getting stuff done is much more difficult. Also the OP struggles with behavioral health/emotional issues. This is not to make excuses but when you have 2 people who have the tendency to be messy and 2 people who have some type of mental illness it just compounds things. She is not in a domestic servitude situation. He needs to clean up after himself. So does she. Each needs to be responsible for his/her own personally generated mess.

hausboy -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 5:39:53 PM)
this thread made me really sad.

angelikaJ -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 5:42:25 PM)
Tftb, You live in a very small space. You need to clear away as much clutter as you can. It is not acceptable that your stuff inhibits your ability to put away the laundry. IF you have that much stuff and you aren't using it then find a home for it where someone else can use it and stop buying things you don't need. It is hard to see mess when there is clutter. When there is a lot of clutter it can be depressing and it can make the other person in the house feel like there is no reason to bother to pick up their stuff... because to them mess is mess. Maybe the NAMI link I sent you could lead you to a professional organsizer who could help you de-hoard. You were talking in a post about having clear paths. When it gets to that point you have probably crossed the line into hoarding. You have a lot of books. Are you likely to read them again? Are the books in bin or are they put up on shelves. You can make bookshelves with boards and cinderblocks. It is cheap and easy to do.

angelikaJ -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 5:47:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: hausboy this thread made me really sad. Me too.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 5:57:58 PM)
I love to read so I used to read a lot, but i am going to thin out some of the books and send them to the children's receiving home and nursing homes if they'll take them, and i'll go to the dr's office next time i have an appointment and leave some there too with a sticky note free to take home. I think that's nice because a lot of times at the dr's office, there's no good reading material if you forgot to bring your own. Because my books have been in storage for more than a year and i have not missed them, or thought, gee you know it's time to get my books out of storage. My dad built me a beautiful book case, because my old one was a tiny little shelf type thing, but I'd rather use it to house the precious collectables we have. We need it for that more than books. The lady that came out and did the free price quote, they also teach organization, though the nami people might do it cheaper. It is hard to see the light of day s when it's always dark or gloomy, and I'm used to the mess and chaos, but i am working to break out of it. We did a couple of hours of cleaning yesterday, and I am going to do some today, and hopefully get some done tomorow with Daddy too, and it already looks better, it's not anywhere near perfect or as nice as it could be, but i am happy with " it looks better" as long as it continues to look better and better on a regular basis. quote: ORIGINAL: angelikaJ Tftb, You live in a very small space. You need to clear away as much clutter as you can. It is hard to see mess when there is clutter. When there is a lot of clutter it can be depressing and it can make the other person in the house feel like there is no reason to bother to pick up their stuff... because to them mess is mess. Maybe the NAMI link I sent you could lead you to a professional organizer who could help you de-hoard. You have a lot of books. Are you likely to read them again? Are the books in bin or are they put up on shelves. You can make bookshelves with boards and cinderblocks. It is cheap and easy to do. quote: en there is clutter. When there is a lot of clut

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 6:06:02 PM)
Now, is that simply because i don't work or people mistakenly think i am a sub and he's a dom, and the sub serves the dom? Because I'm not a sub, not submissive to him, nor is he my dom, so the whole because she's a sub and he's a dom, and the sub serves the dom line of thinking don't fly with me . The space is small so yes, if it were clean i could keep it clean by myself, but since it's not it's to much for me to handle, i have health issues that impact what i can do psychically and it's extremely overwhelming when you live in total chaos, and i just can not deal with it alone. it's to much for my psychical health problems and it causes anxiety attacks, and frankly when i get what i can do done, and he just trashes it all in 3 days, i feel like why bother, because i'm not his maid,I'm not a sub, i'm not a slave, I have zero interest in being treated as a sub or a slave, I am not his mommy, i did not sign up to follow him around and pick up after him. I will not follow him around like he's helpless and pick up after him. And any one who thinks i should, well you're free to come on down to my house and follow him around and pick up after him, like he's helpless simply because he works and i don't. Cause it sure aint my job. He doesn't need me to follow him around and pick up after him at work, he's perfectly capable of picking up after himself there, so work 8 hours or not, he's perfectly capable , and i expect him to, to pick up a fter himself at home. quote: ORIGINAL: calamitysandra Now, while I do agree with the gist of your post Ishtarr, and I, too, believe that the majority of the houswork should be done by her in this case,

searching4mysir -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 6:21:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom Now, is that simply because i don't work or people mistakenly think i am a sub and he's a dom, and the sub serves the dom? Because I'm not a sub, not submissive to him, nor is he my dom, so the whole because she's a sub and he's a dom, and the sub serves the dom line of thinking don't fly with me . A very small part might be that, but frankly it is your place and he moved in with you (at least it seems that way). You have your own hoarding issues. Until you get your shit together you don't have much room to complain about his. If you cannot tolerate how he lives, tell him to leave. Then if he leaves it will all be on you anyway.

angelikaJ -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 6:22:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom Now, is that simply because i don't work or people mistakenly think i am a sub and he's a dom, and the sub serves the dom? Because I'm not a sub, not submissive to him, nor is he my dom, so the whole because she's a sub and he's a dom, and the sub serves the dom line of thinking don't fly with me . The space is small so yes, if it were clean i could keep it clean by myself, but since it's not it's to much for me to handle, i have health issues that impact what i can do psychically and it's extremely overwhelming when you live in total chaos, and i just can not deal with it alone. it's to much for my psychical health problems and it causes anxiety attacks, and frankly when i get what i can do done, and he just trashes it all in 3 days, i feel like why bother, because i'm not his maid,I'm not a sub, i'm not a slave, I have zero interest in being treated as a sub or a slave, I am not his mommy, i did not sign up to follow him around and pick up after him. I will not follow him around like he's helpless and pick up after him. And any one who thinks i should, well you're free to come on down to my house and follow him around and pick up after him, like he's helpless simply because he works and i don't. Cause it sure aint my job. He doesn't need me to follow him around and pick up after him at work, he's perfectly capable of picking up after himself there, so work 8 hours or not, he's perfectly capable , and i expect him to, to pick up a fter himself at home. quote: ORIGINAL: calamitysandra Now, while I do agree with the gist of your post Ishtarr, and I, too, believe that the majority of the houswork should be done by her in this case, I don't think it is a sub serving thing so much as a fairness thing. If one partner works to bring in money and the other person is idle for 8 hours it doesn't seem fair for the working partner to have to come in and do the housekeeping too. I understand that he needs to begin cleaning up after himself, but that will likely be easier to do once most of the clutter is gone. It is simply harder to see the impact one's own mess is making when there is tons of other stuff around... plus he won't be able to use that as an excuse any more. As for your physical issues (your back as I recall?) is there physical therapy you could do? What has your Dr suggested? I am sure that not being physically active because of a back issue was something s/he recommended. Inactivity tends to create muscle atrophy and that doesn't do anyone any good. Muscle imbalances are only going to make your issues worse. edit: remove extra letter

calamitysandra -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 6:26:03 PM)
No, it is not because of your relationship dynamic. It is, in my eyes, just a fair divide of labour in your relationship. He puts in a regular work day, which leaves you with most of the homework. Now, like I already stated, if he is wilfully sloppy and messy he needs to take care of that himself, and yes, as a grown up he should keep up with his own stuff and not intentionally create more work for you. You need to work on that with him. But the day to day maintenance I see as your responsibility. Believe me, I know that it can be frustrating, I live with one husband, three sons, a dog and three cats. I know everything about getting the house nice and clean, just to see it all fall apart again. Thus is the nature of the job. I do understand that the current state of your home might be to much for you to deal with. I second those posters who recommended professional help. A cleaning service is just not going to cut it, you need a professional declutterer/organiser. Maybe you could save up for the lady who came out and gave you a quote? Cutting all extras for a time would be worth it, considering the amount of life quality you two could gain if you changed your living arrangements. But once it is done, and everything is decluttered, organized, and cleaned, it is your job to keep it that way. If you keep using the bad habits of your partner as a crutch to make excuses you will be the one who pays the price in the end.

lizi -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 6:34:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: angelikaJ quote: ORIGINAL: hausboy this thread made me really sad. Me too. Me too. People can always rise to be better though, and everyone has some kind of issues and can strive to overcome them as much as they can. I think that's the point everyone keeps coming back to. Some issues are more and some less, but they can be addressed. I've written here and there about my own life struggles but wanted to mention my mother this time instead. My mother is an incest survivor and lived in an unheated garage with no power or bathroom for part of her childhood until there was a fire. The houses they had after that weren't much better. She took care of 7 younger siblings, my grandfather was an alcoholic, my grandmother had to work to support the family. Mom didnt make it out of that unscathed, she has a host of mental/emotional problems, some physical ones from early malnutrition/starvation and disease- for instance they had no dental care at all, she got all of her teeth pulled early on from decay. She's told me about eating leaves and dirt just to have something in her stomach so she could give her food to the smaller ones- it wasn't' always that bad but who knew when grandpa would drink away all the food money and there wouldn't be any dinner. She had 2 sets of clothing and was ridiculed regularly by her classmates at school. She got out by marrying my Dad at 16, big mistake. They didn't have SSI back then or much of anything except for food boxes from the church every now and then. Even if they had, my grandfather would have drunk the money they received. She's no saint. In fact I do my best but have a hard time being around her for long, her emotional problems are so prominent I just can't take much contact with her, but i try. She raised all 4 of her own kids with food on the table and clothes to wear and the house was freaking always spotless. We had chores to do and we did them. She married a drinker, go figure, but divorced him and went ahead with us on her own. I remember life was really tough, but it was never as tough as she had it. One car we owned had holes in the floor boards and we had to tie the doors shut inside with rope so they'd stay shut while the car was moving. I actually lost my school lunch through the hole in the car floor on the way to school one day. Here's the thing, she made the best of her life. I think that's what everyone here is saying. There will always be problems, life is a series of problems. Some people do better with that concept than others but you know...you can always do or try something and then you have to stick with it. There are no amount of tips or suggestions that can take the place of giving things your best shot and then hanging in there.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 6:40:50 PM)
Yes, i have a slipped disk that is pushing on a nerve and it makes things really painful and causes issues with muscle weakness. I also have osteoarthritis in my back , some degenerative changes, and i have bad knees , the kneecap isn't tracking right and it comes out of the socket for a brief moment and then pops back in. I also have overall weight that just weighs, no pun, a body down and makes everything hurt. The dr really just keeps trying to pin it on loose weight and things will get better. She says there's epidurals one can have shot strait into the nerve if pain is un managble more than not, and nsaids, non steroidal anti inflamitories. And of course exercise. just gentle walks, or swimming, and she approved heartily of me walking the dogs every week, cause it got me out in the fresh air and out doing stuff. I was walking them on Thursday's and Sunday's from 11 am to 1 pm. quote: ORIGINAL: angelikaJ As for your physical issues (your back as I recall?) is there physical therapy you could do? What has your Dr suggested? I am sure that not being physically active because of a back issue was something s/he recommended. Inactivity tends to create muscle atrophy and that doesn't do anyone any good. Muscle imbalances are only going to make your issues worse. edit: remove extra letter

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 6:46:38 PM)
My dad doesn't want me spending our money on a cleaning service, he said he would help, and didn't mind doing so, so we've been and will be chipping away at it together. Once it's clean enough to get in here an do shit with stuff, i do want to get a professional organizer to come in and show us how to organize and make the most of our space, because it's a nice enough space, there's a lot of potential. I actually had a lot of hopes and dreams when we moved into it, like having a space to cook, and do crafts, and he could have a little spot in the outer room for his little tv and he could go in there an get some quiet time and putter on his stuff while i napped or something. Most of all i would love the day if i ever had real life friends i wanted to invite over, they could come over and i could have them over, and entertain and hostess in a functioning space. quote: ORIGINAL: calamitysandra I do understand that the current state of your home might be to much for you to deal with. I second those posters who recommended professional help. A cleaning service is just not going to cut it, you need a professional declutterer/organiser. Maybe you could save up for the lady who came out and gave you a quote? Cutting all extras for a time would be worth it, considering the amount of life quality you two could gain if you changed your living arrangements. But once it is done, and everything is decluttered, organized, and cleaned, it is your job to keep it that way. If you keep using the bad habits of your partner as a crutch to make excuses you will be the one who pays the price in the end.

angelikaJ -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 7:07:30 PM)
Tftb, Those of us who recommend The Flylady didn't do so because we are naturally organised and tidy individuals. We did it because cleaning is or was a struggle. Disclosure: I struggle with organisational and tidiness issues. Here's the thing: until you really want a clean space you just aren't going to get it/keep it that way. So be brutally honest with yourself: If the clutter really doesn't bother you that much then don't try to get tidy because other people want you to or you think you should. You will be setting yourself up for failure. However, if being neat and tidy is important; if living in a clean, neat and uncluttered space is something that you want then you are going to have to realise that like with many adult, responsible behaviors this is going to mean you will be doing stuff to get it that way and keep it that way when you would rather be doing other things. You will have to clean even when you don't want to and more importantly, especially when you don't want to. AND you will have to make that a a priority whether or not your daddy cleans up after himself. You will have to pick up the trash whether or not you are in the mood to do it. You will have to put the laundry away each time you do a load. You will have to sweep and dust even when there might be other things you would rather do. Inch by inch, life's a cinch. Yard by yard, life is hard. The habit of daily cleaning and doing things when they need to be done will go a long way towards making things more manageable.

erieangel -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 7:18:11 PM)
I believe it was on the very first page of this thread, somebody suggested that you go to flylady.net. Did you do that? I ask because I have. My house has been a disorganized mess for more than a year. I work 8 hrs a day and my son has friends over, etc. He hasn't worked in several months--yet he spends most of his days in bed and nights on the computer. Anyhow, the day after I visited the flylady website, I followed the instructions on how to shine my kitchen sink. Not clean it, mind you, shine it. Not only did the method work, it was easier than anything I had tried in the past to get paint stains out of the sink...they are gone now. It is time consuming, but for most of that time, the sink is soaking in bleach water...you get to sit and watch tv or read or whatever in that time. And though flylady cautions not to do too much (the first day, all that is supposed to be done is the sink shine) I don't follow directions very well. When I was done with the sink, it was so clean and shiny I just had to de-clutter the counter tops, then start to work on the stove. My stove was decidedly nasty...now most of the caked on grease is gone away. I read that ammonia will eat away on the last of it, but I am reluctant to try it because of the smell. And Saturday, I set the timer for 15 minutes after shining my sink again and started washing down the cupboards. They're not done because I quit after 15 minutes and today I have been working on my bedroom. I could say I've been cleaning my bedroom all day, but in truth I didn't even start cleaning until after 3 pm and I took more lengthy breaks, working 15 minutes at a time and playing a computer game during my rest breaks (rest breaks lasted an hour or more most of the afternoon and early evening). But now my bedroom is almost totally cleaned--I still have some clutter to move out of there like the books on my dresser that I decided to give away. I went through them and picked out half a dozen I just can't get rid of...the other 20 or so are leaving this house. And those are just the books in my bedroom!! But you know, once all the clutter was out of there, the clothes washed, folded and put away, bed made it took all of 5 minutes to sweep and mop the floor (I have oak floors throughout my house except kitchen and bath). It will be comforting to go to bed tonight without having to move clutter to one side of the bed or to the floor where I will inevitably step on it in the morning. So even if you don't want to go to flylady.net, I suggest you at least designate an area of your apartment to be "today's" work area. Do as much as you can in 15-30 minutes (set a timer!) and stop when the timer sounds. Everything in that area should either have a place in the apartment, a planned future place, or it is trash or good but given away. Have a trash can nearby and toss, toss, toss and take the full bag outside (or wherever you store your trash between pick ups) That stuff you are giving away, bag or box it up right then and there and have your other half take it away when he gets home, if you can't make the donation yourself. But get it out of the house that day if at all possible. (I just finished at 8 pm going through the books, so they won't be going anywhere until tomorrow). For me, cleaning becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. In the past, I've always said things 'this weekend I'm going to clean the house' though plans might be just to get one room done. And I'd never accomplish it because the task was always so darned daunting. I'd become frustrated and not know where to start. Today, I decided I was going to move my bed onto another wall--so the clutter had to get off the floor. But instead of just moving the clutter to another spot, I actually took care of it. I filled a huge garbage bag, put away my clean clothes and washed and put away everything that dirty. I even have fewer clothes!! Most of the items I got rid of were in disrepair, or stuff my mother gave me 5 years ago when my grandmother died and I've never worn any of it. So sans the stacks of books that I still have to find a home for (both those being given away as well as the ones I'm keeping) and some papers I need to sort and put in the file cabinet, my bedroom is spotless. I "worked" on it from 3-8pm, spending more time with an online game than actually cleaning. And my dining room table got cleaned off in the process because I had a lot of clean clothes on that rather than in the dresser where they belong!!

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: how much do most maid cleaning services cost? (3/25/2012 7:22:57 PM)
Anjelika, a lot of people don't think that picking up a pan and washing it right after using it , or getting rid of a flogger is a huge deal or worth cheering for but i do, specially since my usual habit would be to ignore stuff for later, or hang onto the damaged flogger because some little voice in my head said it was salvageable, don't throw it away. I am really pleased with the fact i washed a dish right after eating out of it an threw the flogger out with out to much agonizing. Fly lady is right, one small positive deed can snow ball into other positive deeds. I even brushed my hair and put it into a pony tail and put a cute barrette in it, before going out this morning, and that's not me, i usually just put up my hair with out brushing it first, and don't make any attempt to look cute. The fly lady had an article that talked about loving herself in deed and in thought, and it all started with getting dressed, putting on a small bit of make up and facing the day, and she felt better. it does indeed make you feel more like taking on the day i think, from what i notice, when one has made an effort to prepare to face it.

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