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sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 4:10:52 PM   
artglfr


Posts: 235
Joined: 4/8/2005
Status: offline 		Last night I was being very kind to My sub by keeping her in Bondage and flogging her while she still had her clothes on to start with.

As she was in sub space so totally I decided to use the knife I was using on her to cut her blouse off which I enjoyed doing very much. Apparently she didn't at all. after I saw she was out of sub space I asked her what was up and she said "we never negotiated that...You cutting my clothes off!"  We actually had and I had mentioned I was going to one day but she wasn't real happy.

I untied her and gave her a cookie and sent her outside to cool off.

Sometimes it's not so easy is it?

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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 4:26:56 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline
quote:

We actually had and I had mentioned I was going to one day but she wasn't real happy.


And did she agree to it? I would be upset too if it weren't prearranged. Maybe it would help if you offer to replace her blouse with a new one.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to artglfr)
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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 4:33:56 PM   
sublizzie


Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: proudsub
And did she agree to it? I would be upset too if it weren't prearranged. Maybe it would help if you offer to replace her blouse with a new one.


Particularly if it was expensive!

(in reply to proudsub)
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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 4:41:41 PM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Sometimes it's not so easy is it?
Nope, sometimes it's not.

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If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to artglfr)
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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:10:14 PM   
CollaredProperty


Posts: 167
Joined: 6/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: artglfr

Last night I was being very kind to My sub by keeping her in Bondage and flogging her while she still had her clothes on to start with.

As she was in sub space so totally I decided to use the knife I was using on her to cut her blouse off which I enjoyed doing very much. Apparently she didn't at all. after I saw she was out of sub space I asked her what was up and she said "we never negotiated that...You cutting my clothes off!"  We actually had and I had mentioned I was going to one day but she wasn't real happy.

I untied her and gave her a cookie and sent her outside to cool off.

Sometimes it's not so easy is it?


Knowing how expensive women's clothing is especially fettish wear, You should have negotiated ahead of time. I have done lot's of scenes where clothes were cut off, but they were not my best clothes, but clothes I actually did not mind to sacrafice. Buy her a new complete outfit .....with an appology ......I bet it will do the trick or at least make up for the situation.

slave susan

_____________________________

slave susan
Under A Collar Of Consideration By Master L
Moved to Tulsa Oklahoma
"BDSM SLAVE ONLY, ALPHA TYPE, PASSION FOR EXTREME EDGE PLAY, IT IS NOT ABOUT SEX FOR ME, IT'S ABOUT TPE"

(in reply to artglfr)
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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:15:28 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: artglfr

Sometimes it's not so easy is it?


This is the inherent risk of consent.... it can be revoked at any moment. 

I suppose that is why in my primary relationships I restrict it to a M/s structure.  In that revoking of consent means ending the relationship.  I don't negotiate with my girls. 

I did a similar scene with alandra a couple years ago.  She was told to dress up in a very classy and elegant outfit.  I think her expectation was that I was going to take her out for a nice supper etc.  Instead, I took her a dungeon of someone I knew.  I tied her arms up to the hooks above and then proceeded to rip her clothes off.  Myself and the person I knew then proceed to use her in a variety of ways for many hours. 

At any moment alandra could of revoked consent, or become very pissy afterwards and allowed alot of negative behaviors to project her feelings at me for what I had done with her.  However, alandra has understood the authority with the relationship for a very long time an also understands the consequence of removing consent.  She is able to walk the talk because it is an intrinsic part of who she is within our relationship.  She doesn't need to seek to give consent... She gave it.  She seeks to demonstrate her consent constantly by obeying my will.  She hold on to one external fact.  She holds On that I will do my will with her but I shall not harm her.  She understands that she is a part of my existence like my arm or hearts is apart of me.  She understands that I could no more cut off my arm or rip my heart out than I could desire to harm her.  To harm her or my lovely kyra equates to self-abuse to me.  It has been my focus to make my girls a part of who I am.  In some ways they are the very part of who i am, alot of ways actually.


_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to artglfr)
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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:15:52 PM   
Wulfchyld


Posts: 2618
Joined: 12/7/2005
Status: offline 		As a general rule if you come to Lokiwood wear some of your favorite goodwill clothing and I will personally auction the rags off as souvenirs.

_____________________________

Loki, forum god of Mischief

Submission is not a gift... it is plunder!
Where there is a whip, there is a way!
Dom/mes of a feather, beat the f*ck out of slaves together


(in reply to CollaredProperty)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:17:01 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline 		Hello A/all,

If I plan to destroy somebodies clothing, I am going to be damn sure to pay to replace it.

Or just give her one of my old business shirts to wear and cut that off her.  Which gives me weird feelings similar to the site of a bound submissive in a cheerleader outfit does.

But thats just me, as usual, and Im probably incorrect.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to CollaredProperty)
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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:18:35 PM   
CollaredProperty


Posts: 167
Joined: 6/3/2006
Status: offline 		Loki,

sounds wonderfull and you look hot in Your Leather.

slave susan

_____________________________

slave susan
Under A Collar Of Consideration By Master L
Moved to Tulsa Oklahoma
"BDSM SLAVE ONLY, ALPHA TYPE, PASSION FOR EXTREME EDGE PLAY, IT IS NOT ABOUT SEX FOR ME, IT'S ABOUT TPE"

(in reply to Wulfchyld)
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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:20:10 PM   
CollaredProperty


Posts: 167
Joined: 6/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sinergy

Hello A/all,

If I plan to destroy somebodies clothing, I am going to be damn sure to pay to replace it.

Or just give her one of my old business shirts to wear and cut that off her.  Which gives me weird feelings similar to the site of a bound submissive in a cheerleader outfit does.

But thats just me, as usual, and Im probably incorrect.

Sinergy


I think a Gentleman would do such things.

slave susan

_____________________________

slave susan
Under A Collar Of Consideration By Master L
Moved to Tulsa Oklahoma
"BDSM SLAVE ONLY, ALPHA TYPE, PASSION FOR EXTREME EDGE PLAY, IT IS NOT ABOUT SEX FOR ME, IT'S ABOUT TPE"

(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:24:39 PM   
Wulfchyld


Posts: 2618
Joined: 12/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CollaredProperty

Loki,

sounds wonderfull and you look hot in Your Leather.

slave susan


Thank ya luv, but if you come to Lokiwood you should have your mail forwarded. I would most likely keep you.

_____________________________

Loki, forum god of Mischief

Submission is not a gift... it is plunder!
Where there is a whip, there is a way!
Dom/mes of a feather, beat the f*ck out of slaves together


(in reply to CollaredProperty)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:27:26 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CollaredProperty

I think a Gentleman would do such things.

slave susan


Thank you very much, susan.

It is somewhat in keeping with my ideal about being a Dominant.  I am a firm believer in the code of chivalry.

Just me, etc.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to CollaredProperty)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:35:30 PM   
zumala


Posts: 1121
Joined: 6/16/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld

quote:

ORIGINAL: CollaredProperty

Loki,

sounds wonderfull and you look hot in Your Leather.

slave susan


Thank ya luv, but if you come to Lokiwood you should have your mail forwarded. I would most likely keep you.


*chuckles*  One of these days I'll probably ask more about Lokiwood, but given that I'm not up for grabs, I doubt I'd be invited.  I don't have CP's looks, either. 
 
zuma

(in reply to Wulfchyld)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:37:56 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Let's also remember that a person isn't at their most rational and calm and logical when coming out of subspace.  An irrational immediate reaction wouldn't be surprising.

And yes, she may have consented to it "at some point in the future" but I gotta tell you that if someone cut off my grandmothers favorite shirt that's kinda irreplaceable, I'd prefer they let me know ahead of time.

Lilely this situation wasn't as severe as that, but it's usually good practice to let someone know, unless you KNOW the clothing isn't important ot expensive, that they should wear something disposable.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to artglfr)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:39:55 PM   
artglfr


Posts: 235
Joined: 4/8/2005
Status: offline 		The subs say "buy her a new outfit", cool,!   I wonder where she got that outfit in the first place?  We had negotiated !she knew We were going to play in fact she asked Me if I would play with her.  I had told her I was going to cut her clothes off but I did not say when. The day I have to ask her permission is the day I say "goodbye" to her.

I hope this does not happen I care for her and protect her so I was surprised when she said this. I had always felt she knew she was safe and cared for but now I am having to talk to her about this. She said she grew up poor and didn't have nice clothes then, I told her those days were over and now she does as well as a nice place to stay.

I was knocked for a loop because I saw her drop from sub space which of course triggered a dom drop for me. I had her sit by me after she came back in and talked to her about it. Now EVERY time We go into "space" she is aware there is the possibility I will cut all of her clothes off.

As many have mentioned I guess I hadn't negotiated as well as I thought I had with her. Now she knows and is ok so I guess it is all good.

Thanks for the replies.

_____________________________

Kink Forever
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Docents_of_Museum/

(in reply to Wulfchyld)
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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:42:19 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
I did a similar scene with alandra a couple years ago.  She was told to dress up in a very classy and elegant outfit.  I think her expectation was that I was going to take her out for a nice supper etc.  Instead, I took her a dungeon of someone I knew.  I tied her arms up to the hooks above and then proceeded to rip her clothes off.  Myself and the person I knew then proceed to use her in a variety of ways for many hours. 

That sounds wild and amazing. 

Master owns me, therefore he owns my clothes.  What are clothes but material objects?  Personally I would be more happy that Master even wanted to use me in such a way to entertain himself than upset that I am out a piece of nice clothing.

Then again, I am in an M/s dynamic and negotiations are not part of what we have.  He does what he wants.  It's what I signed up for, and what I need.  And I am grateful for it.

Now, if he did this every time we were together, I might express concern about my diminishing wardrobe...lol.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
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RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:42:38 PM   
Wulfchyld


Posts: 2618
Joined: 12/7/2005
Status: offline 		Everyone is invited. As it stands Lokiwood will be the first solid weekend of OCT. the 7th I think. I will make a website for everyone to join and will send out maps and invitations to all who sign up. It is a privet party, as per OK law, so you have to have your invite to get in. twicehappy and her house are helping with the details and such.

_____________________________

Loki, forum god of Mischief

Submission is not a gift... it is plunder!
Where there is a whip, there is a way!
Dom/mes of a feather, beat the f*ck out of slaves together


(in reply to zumala)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:45:37 PM   
Wulfchyld


Posts: 2618
Joined: 12/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: artglfr

I had told her I was going to cut her clothes off but I did not say when. The day I have to ask her permission is the day I say "goodbye" to her.



So is it fair that she said she would be faithful and you get some "Creepy crawely nasty" and she says she didnt say when; you would be okay with that?

< Message edited by Wulfchyld -- 6/4/2006 5:49:35 PM >

_____________________________

Loki, forum god of Mischief

Submission is not a gift... it is plunder!
Where there is a whip, there is a way!
Dom/mes of a feather, beat the f*ck out of slaves together


(in reply to artglfr)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:47:51 PM   
MasterR001


Posts: 76
Joined: 3/10/2006
Status: offline 		When I want to rip or cut a subs clothes off, I buy the outfit for the scene.  It saves a lot of trouble in the long run.

(in reply to Wulfchyld)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: sub got upset cutting clothes off - 6/4/2006 5:48:56 PM   
MistressDeAnnya


Posts: 37
Joined: 8/1/2005
Status: offline 		I learned the hard way about cutting and ripping someones clothes off (which I love doing)
 
Once I ripped a guys shirt off at a bar and instead of him being turned on he was upset and said "Hey thats my new shirt!"
 
Now I pass out the old tshirts and other clothes I have saved for the occasion, and they love having them ripped off. (since thier not thier good clothes)
 
Mistress DeAnnya

(in reply to Wulfchyld)
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