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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 2:41:12 AM   
robertodom1


Posts: 31
Joined: 6/17/2013
Status: offline 		Well, I don't like very much the idea of financial domination... I can't see the submission part in it and I talked with online friends on internet forums who had experience of it and they were not very happy of it... but maybe they met the wrong people, there are lots of scammers in this world...

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 1301
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 4:49:29 AM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		A few bad experiences shouldn't dictate how everyone else is,

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to robertodom1)
Profile   Post #: 1302
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 5:07:19 AM   
robertodom1


Posts: 31
Joined: 6/17/2013
Status: offline 		that's right... and many slaves in a LTR like financial domination by their Dommes... I think that Financial domination should be a part of a wider relationship

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 1303
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 5:58:33 AM   
MAINEiacMISTRESS


Posts: 1180
Joined: 9/12/2012
Status: offline 		I actually get ASKED to Fin-Dominate by some subs. I used to reject fin-subs because it wasn't really My fetish, but with the subs I've already formed a D/s bond with it's different. Sometimes they want to contribute to some of the Projects My other subs are doing physical labor Service on (Tribute), or else they are habitual overspenders, or gamblers, etc., and are looking for someone to CRACK DOWN ON IT, give them structure to manage their spending, limit how much they can spend. People (subs) with bad habits can certainly benefit from Motivation/Punishment/Reward system provided by a Dominant (and it can be FUN for both parties to work on something together)...weight loss, education, makeovers, health situations...financial matters are no exception. How the arrangement is made depends on those involved. How everything goes down depends on the integrity of the dominant and how eager the fin-sub is to trust someone they don't know despite all the red flags.

If you throw Trust and money at someone whom it is blatantly obvious doesn't have the experience (with life, BDSM, money or whatever) to be QUALIFIED to Dominate, well you're an idiot...but again, some subs ENJOY the "headspace" of being idiots, they ENJOY giving their Trust to a powerless, abusive person. If that's their kink, whatever! Preach all you want "Mom & Dad", nothing's gonna change.

(in reply to robertodom1)
Profile   Post #: 1304
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 7:42:15 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		So after 10 months and 66 pages, did we every come to an answer? Is it legit or what?


_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to Rochsub2009)
Profile   Post #: 1305
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 8:55:12 AM   
SwitchNSpanky


Posts: 418
Joined: 5/28/2013
Status: offline 		I will have to say its legit. (a few years ago I would have said no..) but it's also a very easy area to exploit and there is often more exploitation going on than an equal exchange. I distrust Fin Doms and tend to warn people off of them as a knee jerk reaction. But some folk seem to have this as their legit kink instead of a cover for a scam. I feel I should support anyone's legit kink unless it truly endangers a person. so I'm down.

I know a gal (was a good friend at one time). She got into a relationship with a Gorean dude (who at first I did not like) this guy sent her to work all day. Then used her into the night. Her schedgual was real hard. He did not work per say. He lived off his slaves wages. (he had like six slaves). I spent years wanting to beat this guy crazy. But when she left his service he handed her a financial portfolio I wish I had.

Dude appeared sooo cheap he told her he could not bear to invest in cigarettes for her. She had to quit. Even tho she was adding her full time income to a household income. As a smoker I was pissed for her. But she left his service after five years and he handed her a financial profile that would amaze. She has her own house, plus two rentals. Aaa long as both rentals are filled she need not work unless she wants to. Obviously dude handled her money quite well and was honest enough to change her life. Bravo dude.

Especially because dude pulled a fast one and she fully expected to leave him broke. Turns out he managed her cash wonderfully. (I am
Not finance savey enough to critique his awesome moves except to be stoked and kinda in awe.


True my bro is not pure finDom but he showed me it could be done right. And more than fair.

_____________________________

I am a lover AND a fighter...

(in reply to Rochsub2009)
Profile   Post #: 1306
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 9:26:10 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline 		A perfect example of not judging from the outside. He, to me, is what a findom/me should be about. One who says .....

The following.. to me... is not legit

Being poor for (name redacted) means:

That you have unpurchased Pay mails from Me in your email that you are saving up to buy.
That upon seeing a new PTV come from Me that you covet, you decide which bill to NOT pay so you can buy it
That you can’t afford a vacation for yourself, because you helped pay for Mine.
That you don’t have a girlfriend because you don’t have enough disposable income for dates
Having to borrow money to pay your rent because you spent it on Me. Then turning around and spending the borrowed money
on Me too.
Having your home foreclosed on and sleeping on your in-laws couch because you spent the money to get current on your mortgage on Me.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to SwitchNSpanky)
Profile   Post #: 1307
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 9:31:53 AM   
SwitchNSpanky


Posts: 418
Joined: 5/28/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

A perfect example of not judging from the outside. He, to me, is what a findom/me should be about. One who says .....

The following.. to me... is not legit

Being poor for (name redacted) means:

That you have unpurchased Pay mails from Me in your email that you are saving up to buy.
That upon seeing a new PTV come from Me that you covet, you decide which bill to NOT pay so you can buy it
That you can’t afford a vacation for yourself, because you helped pay for Mine.
That you don’t have a girlfriend because you don’t have enough disposable income for dates
Having to borrow money to pay your rent because you spent it on Me. Then turning around and spending the borrowed money
on Me too.
Having your home foreclosed on and sleeping on your in-laws couch because you spent the money to get current on your mortgage on Me.


This list is both fantastic and totally legit in my eyes. Love it in fact.

< Message edited by SwitchNSpanky -- 6/17/2013 9:34:18 AM >

_____________________________

I am a lover AND a fighter...

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 1308
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 9:58:16 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline 		And yet you were ready to beat the guy who basically, as you believed, did the same.

Why the double standard?

To expand... you said....

quote:

I feel I should support anyone's legit kink unless it truly endangers a person. so I'm down.


You dont consider making someone homeless "endangering" them? For all your complaints about your friends owner, there was a home she was never in danger of losing. All her wants may not have been met, but I have a feeling her needs were. Shelter is a basic need... and you advocate the attitude of the findomme I posted about?

Yes, that was from an actual web site.

< Message edited by tazzygirl -- 6/17/2013 10:06:45 AM >

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to SwitchNSpanky)
Profile   Post #: 1309
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 3:05:10 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		I'm hoping there was a joke in there somewhere in switch's post.
Sheesh, I'm a fin domme and wouldn't allow my sub to go through that crap......well maybe the vaca one.

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 1310
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 3:14:32 PM   
SwitchNSpanky


Posts: 418
Joined: 5/28/2013
Status: offline 		I think y'all misunderstood my last post. Lol. I was saying the list of FinDom donts I quoted was spot on. Those are all reasons I don't like the concept of FinDom.

My friends old master was an exception. Thing is...he gives his slaves the impressionhe is squandering their cash until they leave his service. So, based on what she told us I was very pissed at him during their relationship. None of us knew what he was really doing with the money.

_____________________________

I am a lover AND a fighter...

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 1311
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 7:27:01 PM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline 		And I took exception at your double standard... making the comment...

quote:

This list is both fantastic and totally legit in my eyes. Love it in fact.


Had absolutely nothing to do with any list other than the one I posted and you quoted.

You know, legit means you approve of them, they are ligitimate rules to have as a findomme.

"Loving it" implies you love that list of rules that findomme made up.

If you are going to put your foot in your mouth, dont try and tell me its a banana instead.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to SwitchNSpanky)
Profile   Post #: 1312
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 7:49:13 PM   
SwitchNSpanky


Posts: 418
Joined: 5/28/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

And I took exception at your double standard... making the comment...

quote:

This list is both fantastic and totally legit in my eyes. Love it in fact.


Had absolutely nothing to do with any list other than the one I posted and you quoted.

You know, legit means you approve of them, they are ligitimate rules to have as a findomme.

"Loving it" implies you love that list of rules that findomme made up.

If you are going to put your foot in your mouth, dont try and tell me its a banana instead.


Go back and read that post of mine again. I quoted your WHOLE post, not just the list. I believe your point was in condemnation of greedy and exploitive FinDoms. Or was I confused?

I quoted your entire post, then agreed with your condemnation. I was never hipacritical. You misunderstood my post. You misinterpreted my intent.

_____________________________

I am a lover AND a fighter...

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 1313
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 7:53:15 PM   
SwitchNSpanky


Posts: 418
Joined: 5/28/2013
Status: offline 		To be clear. I can see how FinDom might be a legit kink, but most FinDoms ive come across have turned out to be greedy swindlers. The guy in my story being the only exception I have personal knowledge of.


Edit to add- nothin against any of the FinDomes here. So far everyone here seems pretty stand up.

< Message edited by SwitchNSpanky -- 6/17/2013 7:55:50 PM >

_____________________________

I am a lover AND a fighter...

(in reply to SwitchNSpanky)
Profile   Post #: 1314
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/17/2013 8:10:01 PM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SwitchNSpanky


quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

And I took exception at your double standard... making the comment...

quote:

This list is both fantastic and totally legit in my eyes. Love it in fact.


Had absolutely nothing to do with any list other than the one I posted and you quoted.

You know, legit means you approve of them, they are ligitimate rules to have as a findomme.

"Loving it" implies you love that list of rules that findomme made up.

If you are going to put your foot in your mouth, dont try and tell me its a banana instead.


Go back and read that post of mine again. I quoted your WHOLE post, not just the list. I believe your point was in condemnation of greedy and exploitive FinDoms. Or was I confused?

I quoted your entire post, then agreed with your condemnation. I was never hipacritical. You misunderstood my post. You misinterpreted my intent.


Your post was quite clear. You didnt portray the sentiment you thought you were expressing. Dont fling that back at others because you were not clear in your meanign when your words said the complete opposite.


_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to SwitchNSpanky)
Profile   Post #: 1315
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/18/2013 7:49:11 AM   
garyFLR


Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: robertodom1

that's right... and many slaves in a LTR like financial domination by their Dommes... I think that Financial domination should be a part of a wider relationship


Yes, although in a LTR, the Lady isn't so much a financial dominant, as controller of the relationship finances, there may be a subtle difference there.

(in reply to robertodom1)
Profile   Post #: 1316
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/18/2013 8:24:30 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		A bit yes, but if its started under the pretense of fin dommery then I think that might be the difference.

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to garyFLR)
Profile   Post #: 1317
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/19/2013 12:12:49 AM   
garyFLR


Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline 		There are so many strands to this, it's difficult to unravel.

< Message edited by garyFLR -- 6/19/2013 12:13:22 AM >

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 1318
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/19/2013 12:53:32 AM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		This is true. Thats why we get all puffy when lumped into one category.

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to garyFLR)
Profile   Post #: 1319
RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 6/19/2013 1:08:29 AM   
garyFLR


Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

This is true. Thats why we get all puffy when lumped into one category.


You could never be 'puffy'.

Chairman of the TDNK fanclub & king of the ducklipped ones!

All Hail...

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 1320
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