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lizi -> RE: has this ever happened to another sub? (9/11/2012 4:57:34 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: aleneb
I recently joined a Master to reacquaint me to the lifestyle. He is teaching me slowly. He does offer affection and caresses and slight massages after my punishments. I have my assignments & I have my rewards. But the rewards have not been with him actually in my pussy. He uses his toys (very elaborate toys!) I have given him bj. But he does not physically perform on me except with devices. I have never had a Dom in this manner before, but I am still a beginner returning to the lifestyle so I am grateful that he is patient and trusting. But I am curious I know I can not ask my Master but if other subs could help me figure him out. Anxious to more forward. How long should I give him to find out? I know as a sub I must serve his needs first and be obedient in his training and his desires.
First of all, you are definitely not taking care of yourself the way you should be. I'm not sure why you think you can't ask your Master things, he's supposed to be there for you. If he's the one telling you that you can't ask him things please cut him loose immediately and walk away, that's ridiculous. You are responsible for yourself and for acting like an adult which is to watch out for your safety and for need fulfillment. You cannot just put all that on someone else and think it'll be done by him doing mind reading, you're supposed to communicate with the guy and let him know what you need.
We're not supposed to fill in for him, he's supposed to do that and he wont' know unless you let him know your questions. What he's doing with you isn't following some arcane BDSM protocol that you're not aware of. Saying you are a beginner and that you've never had someone perform in this manner sounds like you think he's following some road map that you don't know about. He's not. He's probably got ED as was suggested and is trying to cover it up. You're letting him because you're not asking him what's going on. I'm not sure why you're grateful he's patient and trusting, he's probably thanking his lucky stars that you're letting him get away with his false front.
How long should you give him to find out? Not one second longer. Figure out if you want to be with this guy or not. If it were me, I'd probably not stick it out at this phase, I'm not into doing without with someone who is basically a stranger to me. If he were someone I cared for it would be much different, but at this stage if I'd decided to be sexual with him then I'd want penetration. That's just me. HIm not being honest with me from the start would pretty much be the deal breaker.
On another note, sounds like CB's Master for sure or another sock of hers. She probably wants us to think this happens to all sorts of people to make herself look better. [8|]
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