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oregongirl -> RE: Is submissiveness a gift to You or expected right away? (9/28/2012 10:37:55 AM)
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I am the OP, and I can see where I made some grammar errors, left out some pertinent information about my experience and some other errors on my part where I wanted to convey accurately what my true questions are, but it came out sounding different after I re-read. You guys/guys are good! You really look at each word and address them very descriptively. Some here look at the overall picture and just answer based on your own experiences. I am grateful for both types of responses.
He and I meet on another site. His profile sounded like someone I would really like to get to know. He lives in my home town. He had some exchanges for a few days on the site and enjoyed communicating. He made me laugh and showed interest by asking what I enjoyed doing in my free time and I questioned him. That went well, so we decided to bring our conversations to personal email. He doesn’t believe in instant messaging or camming and I thought, “wow, that’s a first” and was delighted about that. We decided to meet up in a public place to watch a football game at a sports bar. Our chemistry was electric. We sat close to each other, looked at each other in the eyes as we talked, a little touch with a hand on the thigh felt great. Before we departed, we had our first kiss and that was amazing, and he whispered in my ear something erotic which made me go weak in the knees.
Back to email, I gave him my cell phone number. At first, I thoroughly enjoyed his good morning greetings by phone. We met up a second time at a public place to listen to a live band. The evening went well, had lots of fun. Then he asked if he wanted to go over to his place where it was private. I said, “no, I don’t feel comfortable yet in doing that”.
He kept on requesting me to go out with him again I have been going through a lot of time consuming activities at work and in my personal life, so each time he asked me to go somewhere with him, I would have to turn him down, not because I did not want to see him again, but I had too much on my plate (this was over a week’s period of time). I started noticing he started to become more persistent (and I’m leaving stuff out here because I need to go to work soon), He also started calling me his Pet and asked me to call him Sir. And when I turned him down to drop everything and go out with him on a work night where I still needed to shower and eat, he left me another phone V-mail and said, “you are not being a good sub” and “I’m losing interest” I even assured him we definitely could meet up the following weekend. Yesterday was the last straw. I was at work and forgot to put my phone on vibrate. and started saying in email and phone messages, “ you need to get fucked and used, so let me know when we can get together, I won’t wait forever”. That was the first time I saw this side of him. At this point, I had decided I am not going to get together again with this man.
He called me 5 times demanding that I do as he says, or else. I had my laptop at work and I emailed him saying “please stop calling me while I am at work and what do you mean by “or else”. He replied, “Or else you will not see me again and you are so fucked up you should take down your profile because you are misleading men”. Actually, I thought that was not a bad idea and have since changed it to looking for casual dating and that I want to get to know someone first. He started to scare me because his hostile reactions became more intense and his language became vulgar and almost threatening. He knows what my car looks like. He knows the area in which I live and he knows the area in which I work. I blocked him on my cell phone. I was stunned that his behavior changed so much. He was getting to the point where he was implying that he owned me. After two dates? I’m wondering if I was misleading? Should I have not kissed him? Should I have not flirted with him and played with on the phone with dirty talk? I’m trying to learn for my next encounter with a man. People can hide many aspects of their personality, but I’m glad I found out quickly how demanding he really is. I know I’m going out of sequence here but before I blocked him from my cell phone, he emailed me and said, “good bye and good luck!”. So he dropped me as a possibility because I turned him down twice to get together? I gave him my reasons which were true and I simply could not get out on the days/times he wanted. His profile is completely different. On it, he said that he is patient, gentle and respectful.
Dating used to be so much more simple back when I was in high school and college There we could see each other daily at school and a person can see some consistency in their behaviors. Nowadays, it appears that meeting someone online is the thing and there is a huge risk in starting something when you never really know them. That is why I changed my profile. There really is no way to know if a person’s profile is authentic. They are trying to put their best features out there. I guess what has me stumped is why the fixation on me? Why can’t he just go on to the next woman who has more flexibility in her schedule? We are done, but I’m hoping to learn from this.
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