|
RemoteUser -> RE: Is submissiveness a gift to You or expected right away? (10/3/2012 10:21:30 AM)
|
Since we're on the "gift" issue, I'll reiterate here what I've already said in my journal:
Her submission isn't the gift. She is.
Whether a person talks with you, shares with you, laughs with you, confides in you, holds your hand walking down the street, helps you mess up the bed, showers with you, cries in your arms, supports you, they are giving a part of themselves to you. It's not a gift in the bad-Christmas-choice-that-you-return-to-Walmart-in-thirty-days sense. It's trust - earned, respected, reciprocated - which is given and cannot be demanded (at the very worst, coerced). Opening yourself physically is in no way as deep or profound as opening up mentally and emotionally, exposing the critical parts of yourself that make you, you.
I do cherish and appreciate the ways she serves me, but that's not the sum of her; the totality of her that she shares with me, the exchange of trust and love that binds us together as partners - yes, that is a gift, as far as I'm concerned, one that has immeasurable value. She is the gift, then. All of her. Willingly given, happily received, and what I share in return isn't payment, it's a natural response for me, to her.
(For the non-romantics, you can argue that it's an earned expectation. I'm expressing myself by my default nature.)
|
|
|
|
