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crazyml -> RE: Is it possible to be too submissive? (10/3/2012 7:55:38 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Neckbone
"Now I'm going to give you an example of how patronising might look" you just can't help yourself can you? But what you fail to understand is that's it's so very easy to do, for example the use of the word workshop as a verb it at best lazy, I wouldn't consider it to be literate (unless of course we were putting on a stage production)
Well, I did feel that you needed an example. You reacted in a pretty childish manner to my first post.
quote:
Did you compare your answer to the others on this post? It seems to me the only person here with their "panties in a twist" would be yourself.
Yep. I've carefully compared my answer to the others on this post. And I'm really happy with it. Instead of throwing you a fish, I've set out to give you a net.
Let me explain why, in a non snarky way.
"can a willingness to please a Domme in every other aspect of a relationship be a turn off, even if she believes it to be genuine? "
Honestly, this struck me as a very silly question. Because, if you'd considered it for long you'd have to know that the only correct answer to it is...
"Of course it can be, for some."
As a regular on these boards, one of the most depressing (and all too frequent) types of post is the "I can't be arsed to think this one through, can someone do my thinking for me?" post.
I asked you a couple of questions, and yes - my "let's workshop this" was a little patronising - But given the facile nature of the question, you set yourself up for it good and proper.
I asked -
"Can you remember a time in your life when someone's willingness to help annoyed you?"
I'm asking you to reflect a little. I'm asking you to get off your mental backside and think about this.
I can certainly give examples of when someone's willingness to help has annoyed me. Times when I've wanted to figure it out for myself, or when - actually - I really like cooking, I enjoy the process, and having an over willing sub barge in and insist on chopping the onions for me is really annoying.
"Can you imagine a situation where a domme might find an excess of "willingness to please" a little bit irritating?"
Now I'm asking you to consider it from the domme's point of view. So you might have considered the domme's need for a bit of peace and quiet. You might have considered her preference for doing some things on her own.
"Now... if you're really interested in pleasing, what do you think you need to do in order to avoid irritating a domme? "
I'm assuming that your desire is to please, this last one was to get you to consider what tactics you might adopt to strike the right balance. You're evidently smart... so I'm pretty sure that "communicate" would have been high on the list.
So.... far from being an unhelpful post, I do hope you can see that - no I wasn't going to answer your question for you, that would have been lazy of me. Indeed, I'd have either been wrong (because there really isn't an absolute answer to your question) or very general (which wouldn't have provided you with a useful way to move forward with your problem).
No... in my generosity of spirit I took time out of my fucking busy day, not to feed you for a day, but to give you a way of feeding yourself for life.
I was helping you discover your own inner wisdom, to exercise your own innate capacity for introspection and thought.
<ok... now a little snark and patronisation to close with - because yanno, I can't help myself!>
Now, I am desperately sorry if you lack the maturity to undertake my challenge, and I am broken up with remorse at the thought that I might have cast a pall over your otherwise sunny day but I am utterly content for others to read what I've written and read what you've written and draw whatever conclusion they fucking want to about which of us is out of order.
[ED to fix the two typos I spotted]
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