RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side"

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RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/16/2013 7:01:50 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I just got this gem on the other side.

quote:

"Beautiful Goddess,

I know that a superior woman such as yourself wouldn't be interested in a worthless worm such as myself. I am willing to pay you tribute of a thousand dollars to be allowed the privilege of cleaning the bottom of your shoes and from the bottom from your feet after you have walked through the dirt outside. I will be there visiting my sister in five days. Please consider this offer."

My response?

There is no way on this planet that I am walking outside in My bare feet, in Alaska, in the middle of February.

Please stop spamming people when you haven't even bothered to look at their location.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Shininglight23)

Post #: 481

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/16/2013 7:11:00 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

There is no way on this planet that I am walking outside in My bare feet, in Alaska, in the middle of February.

Frost Bite!

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 482

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/16/2013 7:40:25 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I know, right? Sucking My toes shouldn't preclude Me from keeping My toes.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 483

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/18/2013 12:37:44 PM

Spiritedsub2

Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline

Two messages today from the same guy.

1. do you happen to smoke cigarettes regularly?

2. do you like to wear boots?

I'm getting a picture in my mind of his dream girl... But I'm not it

_____________________________

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 484

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/18/2013 12:47:31 PM

needlesandpins

Posts: 3901
Status: offline

i've had a 26yr old on his first day here send me this;

fuck u thts a fake pic hoe

erm i don't think there is any way my photo could be mistaken as being fake seeing as it's me sat on my bed taken through my bedroom mirror with my mobile. if i was going to use a fake photo i think i'd go for something much better lol

needles

_____________________________

I deserved better. Not than you, but from you.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)

Post #: 485

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/18/2013 12:53:54 PM

MissToYouRedux

Posts: 867
Joined: 1/23/2010
Status: offline

My contribution, sent at 1:51 a.m. (when I was *not* online) my first and only message from a 50 year old guy:

"HI. I just woke up to hit the can."

The mind boggles sometimes.

_____________________________

- Miss Marie

(in reply to needlesandpins)

Post #: 486

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/18/2013 1:00:02 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

I do that, but I don't send out press announcements. I piss or shit and go back to bed, I will let you know about it in the morning if necessary.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to MissToYouRedux)

Post #: 487

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/18/2013 4:56:55 PM

Shininglight23

Posts: 1336
Status: offline

The name was changed below. There's no way he found me on Fet (which lists me in California) by accident. My ex lives in the exact town his profile says he is from. I'm sure that it was him on a "fishing" expedition. I'm sure he was looking for me to say something sexy or send him photos that he can send to my Mister. I wish people would just grow up.

Ohio guy
Ran across your profile tonight... Very lovely smile you have!! Not sure what you are into but you look like a fun person

Me:
I'm a little shocked you ran across my profile considering the distance.

Regardless, thank you for the compliment.

Ohio guy:
You are welcome... That happens sometimes ... How is the weather out there

Me:
Lovely. It's currently 65 degrees and I couldn't be happier. I took a nice long bicycle ride (10 miles) and soaked in the sunshine.

I lived on the snow belt for a while.. Over there in Broadview Hts. How's the weather where you are?

Ohio guy:
It was a little snowy but not to bad... Sounds lovely there... What do you do there??

Me:
If I told you I would have to kill you. ;-)

What's your name?

Ohio guy:
Great picture of you in the car... Very sexy

Ohio guy again:
Off to bed catch you later I am Rob

Ohio guy again:
My name is Rob, how about you little one?? I take it you like being a little...do you have a favorite little outfit?? Do you have a Daddy out there??

Ohio guy again:
At the risk of life I would like to know what you do and what's your name??

Me:
Rob,

I am in a relationship. My partner is my Daddy among other things.

In reference to to a little outfit.. I don't discuss such things outside my relationship.

My name is Allie and I'm still unwilling to disclose what I "do".

Ohio guy:
Thanks for responding.... Does your relationship have an idea what all you are into? Have you share the thoughts in your mind? I would love to see you in your little outfit or outfits if you are opening to showing me. Allie you seem like a very nice young lady!!

Ohio guy again:
My email is ****** at yahoo dot com if you care to share... And know I don't ever share anything done said or shared with anyone else

Me:
Rob,

My partner is aware of my fetishes. The most important thing in our relationship is our connection... and not the kink that is incorporated into our life.

I'm not a "Fetish delivery service" so I'm not going to send you any photos. Not only is it rude for you to ask in general, but it's reprehensible for you to ask AFTER I told you that I'm in a committed relationship.

I will not be contacting you via your yahoo address.

Thank you for the compliment. I *am* a very nice young lady.

Allie

Ohio guy:
Allie,

I certainly did not intend any disrespect to you or your partner! I did not thoroughly understand your dynamic or I would not have asked you for anything...my apologies!

Rob

My favorite part is that he didn't thoroughly understand my dynamic which makes the request for pictures okay.

Allie

_____________________________

Membership Co-ordinator, ProSubs"R"Us

Lead with love, live with love, leave with love.

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 488

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/18/2013 5:06:41 PM

deathtothepixies

Posts: 683
Joined: 2/19/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissToYouRedux

My contribution, sent at 1:51 a.m. (when I was *not* online) my first and only message from a 50 year old guy:

"HI. I just woke up to hit the can."

The mind boggles sometimes.

he obviously thought he was on twitter

(in reply to MissToYouRedux)

Post #: 489

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/19/2013 12:35:55 AM

Rasnow

Posts: 53
Joined: 8/30/2010
From: La La Land
Status: offline

"hi Sarah I am a girl coming from Switzerland in Europ, living in Atlanta since January 2013 I would to meet someone who can lead me in life, and make me like a devoted disciple I am 24 old, close to 25, living in family (uncle and aunt) I am switz and US resident both, and I started to work as a secretary My (discreet) yahoo messenger is [mod edit to remove contact info]"

Not that outrageous but the living in family part made me giggle. And she obviously didn't actually read my profile

< Message edited by VideoAdminChi -- 2/19/2013 4:33:31 PM >

_____________________________

Every person has his own brand of lunacy

http://www.modelmayhem.com/2637149
http://www.facebook.com/sarahleeberryart

(in reply to deathtothepixies)

Post #: 490

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/20/2013 6:35:49 PM

MissToYouRedux

Posts: 867
Joined: 1/23/2010
Status: offline

Another from yesterday, from someone who triggered the bulk mail filter...

"if i gave you 1000 dollars would you piss on my face"

... and they wonder why all those beautiful young women think this site might be lucrative.

_____________________________

- Miss Marie

(in reply to Rasnow)

Post #: 491

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/25/2013 5:57:40 AM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

An invitation for a cyber threesome! Weeeeeeeeeeeee!

9inchesofidiocy: hi randomname here and i am a single black male and i am very well endowed (9inches)
and live with my german shepherd in Houston and would love to chat with you. (although his profile says UK)

Me: I bet you would.

9inchesofidiocy: would you like to chat with us ?

Me: By "us" I'm sure you mean you, your 9inch penis, and your german shepherd?
Thanks for the opportunity, but I think I'll pass. Something tells me I'm not your type of gal.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to MissToYouRedux)

Post #: 492

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/25/2013 8:29:53 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

Me: By "us" I'm sure you mean you, your 9inch penis, and your german shepherd?
Thanks for the opportunity, but I think I'll pass. Something tells me I'm not your type of gal.

Master says, "Wouldn't that make it a foursome?"

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to poise)

Post #: 493

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/25/2013 8:41:55 AM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

Me: By "us" I'm sure you mean you, your 9inch penis, and your german shepherd?
Thanks for the opportunity, but I think I'll pass. Something tells me I'm not your type of gal.

Master says, "Wouldn't that make it a foursome?"

And here I thought you loved your Master only for his looks!

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 494

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/25/2013 12:59:34 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

He's definitely more than just a pretty face....

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to poise)

Post #: 495

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/25/2013 1:05:22 PM

TheLilSquaw

Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
Status: offline

A guy emailed me asking me to do a session with him, where I forced him to eat rotten, rancid food.

_____________________________

LilSquaw
Lifestyle & ProSwitch
Fetish Model, Producer, and Website Owner

http://www.clips4sale.com/69201
http://www.kinkbomb.com/studio/Sadistic_Babygirl_

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 496

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/25/2013 1:09:46 PM

Toysinbabeland

Posts: 1693
Joined: 3/4/2012
From: the other end of Cx's leash
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw

A guy emailed me asking me to do a session with him, where I forced him to eat rotten, rancid food.

So bring him to a tgifridays

(in reply to TheLilSquaw)

Post #: 497

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/25/2013 1:12:09 PM

TheLilSquaw

Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Toysinbabeland

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw

A guy emailed me asking me to do a session with him, where I forced him to eat rotten, rancid food.

So bring him to a tgifridays

I asked him if he thought about the health risk of eating rancid, spoiled food and the legal risks I could be taking. He never answered me.

I saw a documentary on a guy not long ago who only ate rancid meat, he said it cured his cancer.

_____________________________

LilSquaw
Lifestyle & ProSwitch
Fetish Model, Producer, and Website Owner

http://www.clips4sale.com/69201
http://www.kinkbomb.com/studio/Sadistic_Babygirl_

(in reply to Toysinbabeland)

Post #: 498

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/25/2013 1:52:48 PM

Phoenixpower

Posts: 8098
Status: offline

Recently a guy wrote: "Guess who's coming to Munich..... Any recommendations? Places to go.... things to see?"

I went to the mirror and double checked if I somehow did not realise that I changed into a travel information book

Anyhow...I told him that I am not from this area and that I will soon be moving out of here again (which is very likely to be the case) so that I cant help him....

jeeeeesh....should have just sent him a link from amazon with a book about munich

_____________________________

RIP 08-09-07

The PAST is history, the FUTURE a mystery, NOW is a gift - that's why it's called the PRESENT

www.butyoudontlooksick.com/navigation/BYDLS-TheSpoonTheory.pdf

(in reply to TheLilSquaw)

Post #: 499

RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/27/2013 9:52:24 PM

MysticFireTopaz

Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
Status: offline

Just received this gem:

Hello, Your profile is compelling...I have a very serious ass fetish and need to be dominated by an older, more mature woman. If you have a need or desire for a regular, serious sub, who will deep worship your ass every time we get together, along with whatever else you would like, then let us talk more seriously. If there is a connection and chemistry there, I can figure out a way to make this happen. If not, I apologize for having bothered you. Either way, I wish you the best... Respectfully, <name removed to protect the clueless>

Looked at his profile and I am only two years older than he is! Well, I suppose that meets the definition of "older," LOL. Regarding the "more mature" part, if he means more mature than him, that would probably be a true statement.

He also evidently can't read, because he missed the part that says I'm not looking right now, and when I am looking, will only consider someone within 100 miles of me.

(in reply to Phoenixpower)

Post #: 500

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