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RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 1/27/2014 7:31:21 PM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MisterP61

OMG OMG OMG... I got My first one. Word for word here it is.


hello i am 43 years old but so beginner do you do online on yahoo chat too ? if yes please read my profile i am looking for an experience , serious and rough man bcz i lose all my sexual relation with my hubby and i am shy woman that i could not find anyone trust able for real sex i am here to find a dom man for train me and help me to win to my shyness and maybe help me to find a man for real sex as my dom


Damn it MP, do you know how long I spent grooming that Ghana slave to fleece you?

Back to the drawing board.

Exiled

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to MisterP61)
Profile   Post #: 941
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 1/27/2014 7:35:58 PM   
SorceressJ


Posts: 2968
Joined: 7/24/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MisterP61

OMG OMG OMG... I got My first one. Word for word here it is.


hello i am 43 years old but so beginner do you do online on yahoo chat too ? if yes please read my profile i am looking for an experience , serious and rough man bcz i lose all my sexual relation with my hubby and i am shy woman that i could not find anyone trust able for real sex i am here to find a dom man for train me and help me to win to my shyness and maybe help me to find a man for real sex as my dom


Ok, You're twuely One Of Us now..



_____________________________

‎Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc. <93>)O(

(in reply to MisterP61)
Profile   Post #: 942
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 1/27/2014 7:37:39 PM   
MisterP61


Posts: 1345
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SorceressJ


quote:

ORIGINAL: MisterP61

OMG OMG OMG... I got My first one. Word for word here it is.


hello i am 43 years old but so beginner do you do online on yahoo chat too ? if yes please read my profile i am looking for an experience , serious and rough man bcz i lose all my sexual relation with my hubby and i am shy woman that i could not find anyone trust able for real sex i am here to find a dom man for train me and help me to win to my shyness and maybe help me to find a man for real sex as my dom


Ok, You're twuely One Of Us now..



WOOHOO I finally earned My "twueness". Sweet.

_____________________________

Proudly married to the "Diva of Destruction" LadyPact
Though the truth may vary, this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore - Of Monsters and Men
What is the maximum effective range of an excuse? Zero meters!

(in reply to SorceressJ)
Profile   Post #: 943
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 1/30/2014 1:57:57 PM   
SweetAngel43211


Posts: 578
Joined: 6/27/2013
Status: offline 		I got two messages today one stated that they had a sex/kinked based questionnaire he wanted me to answer and was I interested.. Um no not in a first contact email. The other one just said Hello Girl. That was it nothing else... I read the last one's profile and it listed every one of my hard limits on his lives for list!

(in reply to MisterP61)
Profile   Post #: 944
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 1/30/2014 2:14:06 PM   
SweetAngel43211


Posts: 578
Joined: 6/27/2013
Status: offline 		Okay I guess today is they day for me lol. Right after I posted my other message I got one that said "Slave bow before me, I am a black dominant male"... I say in the second sentence of my profile that I have no desire to be a slave... When I opened the email so I could block and delete him it said that he is a submissive male... hmmmm...

(in reply to SweetAngel43211)
Profile   Post #: 945
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/10/2014 6:28:43 AM   
searching4mysir


Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline 		FR

I got this gem this morning:

quote:

I get it, he doesn't share...........how about selling you outright?


_____________________________

No longer searching -- found my one and only right here on CM


(in reply to SweetAngel43211)
Profile   Post #: 946
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/12/2014 5:18:51 AM   
MissKittyDeVine


Posts: 1054
Joined: 9/24/2011
Status: offline 		Ah, the week just isn't complete without a funny message.

GET OFF CM HELLEN

My name is not Hellen. It has never been Hellen. Or indeed, Helen.

_____________________________

Sanity is overrated. Live la vida loca

(in reply to searching4mysir)
Profile   Post #: 947
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/12/2014 5:24:41 AM   
MissKittyDeVine


Posts: 1054
Joined: 9/24/2011
Status: offline 		I was then told to pass the message (such as it was) to Hellen. But I don't know her, Anon! Can't tell you that since you have blocked me. But thank you for the giggle.

_____________________________

Sanity is overrated. Live la vida loca

(in reply to MissKittyDeVine)
Profile   Post #: 948
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/12/2014 2:49:29 PM   
hlen5


Posts: 5890
Joined: 3/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissKittyDeVine

I was then told to pass the message (such as it was) to Hellen. But I don't know her, Anon! Can't tell you that since you have blocked me. But thank you for the giggle.



Thanks for taking care of my light work!!

_____________________________



My fave Thread: http://www.collarchat.com/m_2626198/mpage_1/tm.htm

One time "Phallus Expert Extraordinaire"

(in reply to MissKittyDeVine)
Profile   Post #: 949
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/13/2014 9:17:46 AM   
MalcolmNathaniel


Posts: 1394
Joined: 9/20/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DNAHelicase

OK, this is going to be long. Really long. I apologize for the scrollage that will ensue, but...I think some of you will enjoy this. This happened a while ago ...



That was fucking AWESOME!

(in reply to DNAHelicase)
Profile   Post #: 950
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/13/2014 9:54:37 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		I got one the other day from a 48 year old Dom in Sweden. He writes that he wants me to be his maid.

I wrote back, no, I don't do housework especially online to Sweden, and that I have my own cleaning woman.

He keeps writing, no I am serious, I need you to be my maid.

I wrote, how about I switch for you and you can clean my house and blocked him.

A few minutes later I get an email from another Dom in Sweden who said, here is a message from my friend ______, you a a worthless cunt whose only good to be a Redheaded whore.


(in reply to MalcolmNathaniel)
Profile   Post #: 951
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/13/2014 10:26:59 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

Redheaded whore.




Thanx red, I've been agonizing over this for a bit now, trying to find the down side... Someway to disagree with it, struggling to defend your honor, but I go nuthin... No, wait.... I've got a penny jar that's half full and some lenders truffles, what would that buy me?

Hot for red
Exiled

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 952
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/18/2014 5:00:54 AM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline 		I just want to rant about how annoying is it to have a 50 yr old self-proclaim male dom throw a hissy girly fit at you because you refuse to send him your picture. Lol, and he keeps saying his genuine, like that verifies that he is a safe person to send my pictures to.
I got a theory because I am exuding alot of alpha energy myself, I am attracting these old doms that behave like teenage girls!

(in reply to JanahX)
Profile   Post #: 953
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/19/2014 4:32:01 AM   
smileforme50


Posts: 1623
Joined: 1/24/2013
From: DelaWHERE(?)
Status: offline 		This morning I got a message from a 26 year-old "Dom" asking me if I've ever been bred.

I don't know if he was just doing a survey or was hoping for more..... But I really wouldn't expect someone with an interest in breeding to be contacting someone who is 48. Or is it just me?

_____________________________

“Give it to me!” she yelled
“I’m so fucking wet! Give it to me now!”

She could scream all she wanted…..I was keeping the umbrella.

(in reply to Greta75)
Profile   Post #: 954
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/19/2014 6:41:24 AM   
WinsomeDefiance


Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline 		"You still on here? Want to do that thing we talked about?"

I'll admit I have a bad memory, but umm? Pretty sure I've never talked to the guy before.

I get quite a few of those, emails pretending to already know me and wanting to hook up.

Either that or I have a VERY promiscuous alternate personality who is having WAY more fun that she should.

(in reply to Hillwilliam)
Profile   Post #: 955
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/19/2014 6:54:04 AM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: smileforme50

This morning I got a message from a 26 year-old "Dom" asking me if I've ever been bred.

I don't know if he was just doing a survey or was hoping for more..... But I really wouldn't expect someone with an interest in breeding to be contacting someone who is 48. Or is it just me?

Smile, you could have told him you were "bred" by your parents. But then that's just the silly in me, leave them scratching their heads.


_____________________________

"RABBIT IS GOOD, RABBIT IS WISE".

"I'm a baaa-aaad pussycat".


(in reply to smileforme50)
Profile   Post #: 956
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/19/2014 6:58:19 AM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		I keep getting this guy that wants me to dress up in "a cowl-necked sweater dress".

That's it, that's all he wants.

_____________________________

HBIC



(in reply to tiggerspoohbear)
Profile   Post #: 957
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/19/2014 10:09:33 AM   
MasterCaneman


Posts: 3842
Joined: 3/21/2013
Status: offline 		That's pretty tame. And judging by your avatar, you'd look pretty good in one, in my humble opinion. (and no, I'm not the guy)

_____________________________

Age and treachery will always overcome youth and ambition.

The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting. ~ Sun Tzu

Goddess Wrangler



(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 958
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/22/2014 6:52:21 PM   
SweetAngel43211


Posts: 578
Joined: 6/27/2013
Status: offline 		I just got an email from an 18 year old male submissive who wants to know if I want to play with him and if I would be willing service top him!

I don't date or play with younger men, especially ones that are 14 years younger than me, and I have no desire to service top anyone...

(in reply to MasterCaneman)
Profile   Post #: 959
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 2/22/2014 7:07:54 PM   
ShaharThorne


Posts: 11071
Joined: 2/24/2009
From: Somewhere in TX
Status: offline 		A sub wanting me to give him a chance...

his pic had his privates tucked in like the serial killer on "Silence of the Lambs"...creepy...

_____________________________

Goddess of Yarn

You are making two and a half feet of irresistible, tubular sex! -Lola, Kinky Boots

Founder: Bitch with Tits

Whip me, beat me, make me feel cheap and have great sex

(in reply to SweetAngel43211)
Profile   Post #: 960
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