RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (Full Version)

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freedomdwarf1 -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (7/14/2016 3:53:38 PM)

I don't often get many "funny" messages on the other side.

But here's one I got recently -
quote:

From: Sweet********



Dated: 6/28/16 6:19 PM

[You cannot respond to this message because the account no longer exists]

idi amin


Dafuq????

Never heard of her and never conversed with her either.
There's some weird nutters out there.



OsideGirl -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (7/14/2016 4:15:28 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:


Hello
Do you get spanked online?


And that is the entirety of the message.

I politely <cough> explained that it's impossible to get spanked online.

And now he's emailed the same exact message again and done a chat request after I told him to go away.



OsideGirl -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (7/19/2016 10:40:45 AM)

So, my profile says "Just here for the forums"

I received this:

Him: Are you fat,slim or plumpy?? Well I don't care I just wanna know OSIDEgirl

Me: As my profile says, I'm just here for the forums.

Him: Forums? Or you don't do men... I got a lot of female slaves..you could have one









DesFIP -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (7/19/2016 1:22:27 PM)

Takes a hell of a lot of stupidity to be on this site and not know what the word forum means.



OsideGirl -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (7/19/2016 1:24:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Takes a hell of a lot of stupidity to be on this site and not know what the word forum means.



Apparently, it's code for "I'm a lesbian"....[:D] I never knew that.

I wonder how his multitudes of female slaves would be pleased to know that he'll offer to give them away to anyone on the internet.



OsideGirl -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (7/25/2016 9:02:48 AM)

So, the other day, I was on the Kindle, went to set it down and my hand hit the screen and opened a profile. Within a few minutes, I get a cut and paste message:

quote:

Greetings: We noticed you viewed Our profile so We returned the favor. And since We consider it bad form to not at least say hello and introduce Ourselves that is what We now are doing....; ) If you have any questions or comments feel free to ask We pride Ourselves on being very open and honest and try to help with what advice We can or if it's just a chat We are on most nights.


I don't understand people that think viewing a profile is an invitation or indication and honestly, it just strikes me as something desperate. And the part about "We consider it bad form" kinda comes across as a manipulation to get people to reply.

So, I came to the conclusion that I would test them to see if they actually had seen my profile. I have a picture of M placed in the middle of my photos, to see if people actually look at my profile.

I asked them if they could tell me three things about myself beyond age, ethnicity and orientation.

The response I got back was epic.

quote:

Well frankly nothing caught Our eye and if you were to read Our message you would have noticed the only reason We looked at your profile was because you had viewed Ours. (let's start with an insult...ohhh...burnnn) But unlike you We had the common courtesy to introduce Ourselves and offer a polite invitation to both read Our profile and to contact Us if you liked.(We troll everybody that looks at our profile and then try to make them feel bad about not sending a message) But like so many on here you feel you are special and have no manners or proper composure. (translation - I didn't do what they wanted) A simple thank you for Our message or even a no thank you was all that was in order (We're supposed to thank Trollers for their messages?) but instead you decided to be rude (Again, how was I rude? Because I didn't respond like they wanted me to?) and if as your profile states you are only here for the forums We suggest you stick to them and stay off of Real members profiles. (and a closing insult about being fake because I'm not trolling)


All this because I accidentally bumped my Kindle.

Quick everyone.....go view their profile....




OsideGirl -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/23/2016 1:10:00 PM)

Just got this one:

Him - I lead you into the hotel room, as soon as the door closes, I shove you against the wall. Then I run my fingers all over your upper body. Do I find you wearing a bra?

me - What you find is my ex-linebacker Master/husband removing your teeth.

For some reason he hasn't replied.....



WhoreMods -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/23/2016 2:57:19 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
I wonder how his multitudes of female slaves would be pleased to know that he'll offer to give them away to anyone on the internet.

I suppose if he has a swap or two, it's one way to complete his set.



needlesandpins -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/23/2016 4:15:20 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Just got this one:

Him - I lead you into the hotel room, as soon as the door closes, I shove you against the wall. Then I run my fingers all over your upper body. Do I find you wearing a bra?

me - What you find is my ex-linebacker Master/husband removing your teeth.

For some reason he hasn't replied.....


This made me laugh ... I mean hard!

I am so surprised he hasn't messaged you back lol

Needles



OsideGirl -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/23/2016 4:29:10 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Just got this one:

Him - I lead you into the hotel room, as soon as the door closes, I shove you against the wall. Then I run my fingers all over your upper body. Do I find you wearing a bra?

me - What you find is my ex-linebacker Master/husband removing your teeth.

For some reason he hasn't replied.....


This made me laugh ... I mean hard!

I am so surprised he hasn't messaged you back lol

Needles

I'm sure the photo of M on my profile suddenly gained some perspective for him.



ShaharThorne -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/24/2016 3:05:41 AM)

I get that guy once in a while, Oside...I just check it and delete unread (love the preview option).



needlesandpins -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/24/2016 10:08:58 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Just got this one:

Him - I lead you into the hotel room, as soon as the door closes, I shove you against the wall. Then I run my fingers all over your upper body. Do I find you wearing a bra?

me - What you find is my ex-linebacker Master/husband removing your teeth.

For some reason he hasn't replied.....


This made me laugh ... I mean hard!

I am so surprised he hasn't messaged you back lol

Needles

I'm sure the photo of M on my profile suddenly gained some perspective for him.


Haha, had to check him out for myself just so I had the perspective too. I'm sure M is going to fit nicely in to this guys fantasy [:D]

Needles



OsideGirl -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/26/2016 3:47:45 PM)

Him: Are you enjoying the forums?

Me: Yes, I like seeing the perspectives of other people

Him: Sir

Me: Oh, I'm not a "Sir", I'm female.

Him: I'm a Sir and you will address me as such.

Me: You're not my Sir and it's a term of respect...so no, I won't

Him: You're not a submissive, you're fucking wannabe. That's why you can't find anybody and have to hang out in the forums.

Me: Wrong. I've been married to Master for 17 years. Have a nice day.

<blocked>



Spiritedsub2 -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/26/2016 4:00:07 PM)

^ Impossible to believe that charmer is still on the market [:D]



OsideGirl -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/26/2016 4:12:32 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2

^ Impossible to believe that charmer is still on the market [:D]

If you hurry, I bet you could snatch him up!



needlesandpins -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/27/2016 12:42:48 PM)

Wow, super stud.

One in my mail box today;

"Hello. Dominant Male and experienced Master, seeking submissive/switch. Are you interested?"

Well now, Sherlock, the clue you are seeking would be in my profile that you haven't read. [sm=doh.gif]

Needles



NorthernGent1 -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/28/2016 11:06:08 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

Wow, super stud.

One in my mail box today;

"Hello. Dominant Male and experienced Master, seeking submissive/switch. Are you interested?"

Well now, Sherlock, the clue you are seeking would be in my profile that you haven't read. [sm=doh.gif]

Needles



Just read your profile, well, skimmed it.

I could give you an honest assessment, but probably wouldn't be good form in public.





needlesandpins -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/28/2016 11:32:09 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent1


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

Wow, super stud.

One in my mail box today;

"Hello. Dominant Male and experienced Master, seeking submissive/switch. Are you interested?"

Well now, Sherlock, the clue you are seeking would be in my profile that you haven't read. [sm=doh.gif]

Needles



Just read your profile, well, skimmed it.

I could give you an honest assessment, but probably wouldn't be good form in public.





An assessment of my profile?

Needles



NorthernGent1 -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/28/2016 12:23:37 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins


quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent1


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

Wow, super stud.

One in my mail box today;

"Hello. Dominant Male and experienced Master, seeking submissive/switch. Are you interested?"

Well now, Sherlock, the clue you are seeking would be in my profile that you haven't read. [sm=doh.gif]

Needles



Just read your profile, well, skimmed it.

I could give you an honest assessment, but probably wouldn't be good form in public.





An assessment of my profile?

Needles


Yes. You. Aged 42. From Doncaster, Bradford or whatever it is in Yorkshire, of Italian heritage.



needlesandpins -> RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" (8/28/2016 12:34:18 PM)

News flash;

I don't need you too. It's Greek BTW, and Bradford, where Doncaster is no where near, is in Yorkshire [8|]

You see my profile does what it says on the tin. Quite clearly it states exactly what I'm here for, and what I'm not here for. It's mine, so it's not up for debate, just the same as what I wear is not up for debate, and is not a come on for any random bloke.

You have pointed out one flaw of this dated site though; it doesn't do the auto update of ages. I'm actually 44.

You see, not only would it be really poor form to comment on my profile in public, in actual fact what you have done already is, but it would be shear arrogance when your opinion hasn't been asked for in the first place.

Needles



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