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AAkasha -> RE: To all the regulars that said I'd never find her. (10/17/2012 2:10:30 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: BlackSockSlave
You know who you are. The ones that said I was too picky or not submissive enough. Well, as you also know, I'm the greatest online dater there is, was, and ever will be. Every day the most beautiful women from all around the world message me with the most sweet and generous comments. My inboxes are always full - and I'm a man. That never happens. I'm a male god. I always have exact copies of messages and photos of my inboxes as proof, and every word of my profile is true. I also sell an online-dating course that gets real results.
Well, yesterday I was about to stop checking my mail, accept loneliness, and just focus on all my super successful businesses. Then I saw this one beautiful woman and I clicked on her profile. Then I saw her photos. Then I saw one of her photos, and she was wearing something that gave us an instant connection. I messaged her with my usual confident charming self, and within an hour she wrote back and said I'm so happy to have read this and we really are pretty much perfect together. She asked for my number within 10 minutes and we talked on the phone for 8 hours. We were on the phone so long, I was dizzy when I finally stood up and almost fell down. LOL That's gotta be some kind of record. After hours of the most awesome phone call I ever had, she told me she loved me and wanted me to be her husband. People, this woman is the most amazing, beautiful, accomplished, and intelligent woman EVER. She is a former beauty pageant queen, cheerleader, Olympic medalist, and even a rugby and volleyball player. Now, women fall in love with me every day, but I don't return the favor. But this time I did. We have 99.9% of everything in common. She's like the female version of me with girl parts. And then on a total whim, she invited me to her mansion states away and I froze. Then she offered to pay hundreds of dollars to fly down here to be with me next weekend.
See, I'm an anti-social computer genius, and I've never really been with a girl before. Never had a girlfriend. Never kissed a girl. It was always just me and my computer. All the magic happens from my bedroom. I hardly ever leave the house. But now after thinking I never would find the dream girl I created in fantasy, have found my soul-mate, and I'm extremely scared and nervous but happy and excited to meet her. What if she thinks I'm ugly? Or as she said, she has to make sure we have the same connection on the phone as we do in person. What if we don't, I have the best weekend of my life, and then she never contacts me again and I'm heartbroken and can't go on? I need to hear from people with real-world love experience. I don't know if I can do this. This is the first time I'm letting a woman into my wonderful world. I agreed to see her. I want to see her. I'm just scared of any potential disappointment.
While most have chosen to just discredit the entire question for a variety of reasons, I'm just going to answer it, because there may be a lot of lurkers that are in very similar situations that could benefit from some insight. The question really is about the transition from online to real life and how can people avoid disappointment.
First - manage expectations. Both YOURS and HERS. The one thing you are doing right is MEETING QUICKLY if the flame is burning hot, which it is. The longer you wait, the more infatuation will build, and it lessens the liklihood that real life will match up with fantasy.
Second - don't get clingy and desperate if it seems too good to be true. This goes for both parties. You are already worrying that she may never contact you again and you haven't met yet. If that happens, you will deal with it. But living in what if's won't do any good. Stay in the moment.
Regarding your specific situation, you need to be very cautious. You said you have never kissed a girl. You are 28. She's very experienced and worldly it would seem based on your description, so she may be used to men who are - no offense - more sophisticated when it comes to dating. You may be very confident in your realm - which is computers or in text or online - but that's different than real life. So be humble. If you are falling short in your ability to treat her in the way she expects to be treated, from a courtship standpoint, due to your lack of dating, then admit it and tell her you are ready to learn.
Finally, a cautionary tale. Being 28 with no real dating experience and having a strong fetish to boot is a tough, tough situation -- it means your ideals of sexuality and intimacy are probably off kilter a bit. If you haven't kissed a girl, you haven't learned, yet, the nuances of intimacy, sensuality. But you have had plenty of time to learn porn, fetish, and self pleasing. When you finally have a living, breathing woman with you - and a kinky one at that - you will be like a kid in a candy store and no one blames you.
But trust me, no woman wants to be "the candy store" -- she wants to be a woman. Just remember that.
Akasha
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