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ORIGINAL: KennelDeSade2

It's a great place for minds to meet, but unless the body is following close behind, it's just masturbation fantasy.

One really big problem I see.  It takes me ten minutes to give a good description of an action that will take me a minute and a half to complete in real time.  I've only got so many minutes to spare, I know where I feel they are best spent.

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ORIGINAL: Kimera

Yah, what timeoutgurlie said.  Chill, Emperor dude.  So she's a troll.  Aren't we all?  She's not as good as ME.  And lose the new clothes.  They make you look like you're hung like a weasel.

OH, and while I'm here.  Note that all that matters is timeoutgurlie's little fuck poems to her boyfriend.  She knows that letting you all know about her self indulgent dirty emails is what matters, not withstanding the rest of the posts.  Hey, she's 19, and the little cunt already knows how to tease.  Soon she'll be old enough to drink, and then the boys REALLY have to worry.

But what do I know?

Kimmie, who should not have eaten that last Italian...

...sausage.

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ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

Some people aparently 'get something' from cyber fantasy game playing and seem to think it is 'real'. Bully for them, but personaly it does nothing for me and I can't understand the attraction. If I can't meet her, touch her, hold her in my arms.... then it ain't real!

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ORIGINAL: jadedshadow

OK I'm about to the point of pulling out my hair with all the crapola I keep seeing in the forums against online submission. (Snip) Before I go on my rampage let me make a few things clear... YES my collar is from a "cyber" Dom. Yes, for the most part my submission is laid out online. (Snip) You're forced to reach inwards, past the physical, into the reaches of the mind, and soul, and experience submission from the core with all of your being, and not just exert a natural physical response to the dominant party.(snip)  He has taught me more about myself in the past few months than I was able to experience offline in over 2 decades. He did this by communicating with me, forcing me to experiment, being patient with me, and loving me, disciplining me when needed and forgiving me and most importantly finding my needs, understanding them and meeting them.

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I not only wish to understand but am writing an article on the subject. Not to flame, not to make fun of, but to help heighten awareness of the different facets of this thing we call our 'lifestyle'.

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Thanks Albatross for a reply that actually made sense and was useful without flaming me for asking the question!

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I just don't understand how the mentality can be the same (or as strong) in fantasy as it is in reality. . . especially the 'giving of oneself' to a keyboard and an IM box???

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The mentality and dynamics of an offline based relationship are completely different from a long distance relationship and a cyber relationship.

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ORIGINAL: brightspot

I think it has it's purposes, such as meeting, getting to know each other, building a short base of trust.
Because my Domina and I were 7 hrs. away from each other it was a good place for us to start. But when we were sure that we wanted to pursue something deeper, it for us was paramount for us to meet in person. I think our on-line interaction(alone) went on for like 6 weeks the last 2 being focused on my trip to her.
So for myself it has it's benefits in the beginning of exploring a possible relationship but I would not be interested in doing that long term. I'm a touchy/feeling kind of person.
 
*Brightspot

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ORIGINAL: meatcleaver

It is a case of whatever floats your boat but the onus is on the sub to obey without a physical presence to make sure she does so really it is down to the sub as to how much she can think of herself into the role of sub, which is really acting.

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ORIGINAL: Calandra

The world seems to be made of people who fit into black and white thinking on certain subjects. There are those who simply cannot wrap their minds around online relationships. It's almost as if the idea that someone could be just as fulfilled in an online relationship as they are in a full-time totally-devoted fully-operational and all-encompassing relationship, might somehow invalidate the time and investment they put into their practice of wiitwd.
 
If you need to see, touch, hear, and fully experience someone thats wonderful, pursue that. My question is why does YOUR need automatically relegate someone else's DIFFERENT experience to the realm of "fake", "wannabee", "insecure", and so many other labels?
 
I am real- life, with a poly household of individuals who fill many different needs for each other. We're an in-house support system for each other. At this point in my life, I do not accept online submissives. Why? Because I KNOW HOW POWERFUL THE CONNECTION CAN BE.
 
I spent two years (a long time ago) as an online slave... My real life Master had died and I discovered the internet about a year afterwards. I thought "Great! I can hang around with others like me, but not be in "danger" of making a real life connection (since the internet couldn't possibly be real)"
 
I met a Dominant who gained my interest, and trust over time. He was a gentleman, and never flamed anyone, yet was always willing to help new ones learn real ways to protect themselves as they began their submissive journey. He was well-thought-of by Dom/mes and slaves alike. No matter how abrasive someone was to him, he treated them with respect and courtesy, and refused to get reactionary.
 
He wouldn't collar me for several months after I asked for it... He said that collars are special, and should be well-considered before they were given or accepted. He began giving me assignments to perform in real life. He set goals for me. He helped me to puzzle out solutions to problems I was having in my day to day offline life. I found my thoughts would always return to "how would Steven expect me to handle this?" or "I should do this honorably because it would reflect badly on Steven".
 
 Yes, there were times we were intimate... funny though, we'd flirt or He'd give me specific commands to perform sexually, but we didn't type out the AAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh! kinda stuff you see in many cyber scenes. His advice, commands, and interest in my life was REAL and the emotion that inspired was real. I loved Him. (actually I still do in a way, since love, once given by me, requires an act of true dishonor on the other person's part for me to withdraw it)
 
Those of you who can't get your head around online relationships....think about it a minute... SOME online relationships are a kink, a joke, not real or valid.... but SOME real life relationships are also a kink, a joke, not real, or invalid....
 
I roll my eyes at the online public cybering that we've all seen... I simply cannot get into that myself. Not all online relationships are based on cybering though. Real, valid, and enriching connections can be forged on the internet.
 
People who judge online relationships of other people harshly are really not being fair or openminded, and quite often they are the ones who cry foul when others judge them. 

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Online Domination is neither fake nor weak if done right. And yes, it helps if you have been there before and realize the limitations of it.

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ORIGINAL: easythere

Ive met people who have cybered for years and fnally met in Real Time , only to fall head over asses in love with each other for ever.... I can not say it doesnt pose a threat, it can and it has,  for those people who live mentally inside themselves and climb out of thier prison. Finally, to find true feelings once they search outside thier fantasies into what others already explored and took for granted. Cyber is a wonderful way to open up the shy and the afraid, if it takes that to get anyone to connect to how they feel , Yes, yea baby, do it, do it all the time.... in no time you might be real, you might find that one door that opens up your fantasy, Hellya <former Gorean Slave>

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ORIGINAL: Calandra

Brosco,
 
Since that time, I was also an online and telephone Dominant, professionally, and to be honest, the interchanges between some of my clients were surface stuff... You know, Dominance a'la'carte. But there were also many many of them who became dear to me. I had to stop the professional side because I was burned out from having the emotional responses to so many different people that there was nothing left at the end of the day.
 
I found myself feeling hostile towards the "jerks" who wanted me to work off of a script, and yet I'd also find that I was drained when I scened with some of the darlings who evoked positive feelings.
 
I am an emotional being, and I realized a long time ago that having an online or telephone relationship can be very freeing...