RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (Full Version)

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Aylee -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:28:04 PM)

FR

This is the internet. I do not care which site you choose to post on, make it readable, make it intelligent, make it at least semi-meaningful, or get used to having a thin coating of bbq sauce on your ass.




absolutchocolat -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:29:55 PM)

that's called holding a grudge, and i don't do it. it takes more energy to hold on the bullshit than it takes to let it go. i don't make people eat crow for past mistakes. it's childish.

also, we're talking about virtual strangers in an online forum. it's apples and oranges.




JanahX -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:30:08 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: absolutchocolat

quote:

One side digs in, so does the other, until right and wrong stop being the point and the real "thrill" is seeing who will get the best zinger in. To me, that is the death of conversation, and maybe dancing a little on its grave. Not my thing personally.


this. also, bringing up old threads that have nothing to do with the current conversation for the sole purpose of embarrassing the OP. that's over the top.


I disagree - it shows that that particular user might have a history of doing the same thing or posting the same thing.




absolutchocolat -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:35:26 PM)

if people want to know the history of the OP, they can look it up themselves. posting necro threads is often used as a bully tactic to make the OP look bad.




Hillwilliam -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:37:06 PM)

Seriously folks. There's a bunch of fucking Sadists on this site and we're supposed to act like it's 3rd grade?




kitkat105 -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:37:38 PM)

I just hope I am a part of the CCC! I need validation! Please! [;)]

If new people don't like it here, fuck off. Yep, that's about as much sympathy as you'll get from me. This is an adult messageboard.




RemoteUser -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:37:51 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: absolutchocolat

quote:

One side digs in, so does the other, until right and wrong stop being the point and the real "thrill" is seeing who will get the best zinger in. To me, that is the death of conversation, and maybe dancing a little on its grave. Not my thing personally.


this. also, bringing up old threads that have nothing to do with the current conversation for the sole purpose of embarrassing the OP. that's over the top.


Actually, I disagree. History is important and it impacts how you deal with others. I'm absolutely positive that you have someone in your life that you dislike because of their past behavior....and that behavior gets brought up when you're dealing with that person again.


If I might interject here, I would offer a point for consideration.

Is a positive history brought up as often as a negative one?

I ask because some people gravitate towards negativity, it leaps more nimbly to the fore of their mind than positives. When that occurs, positive changes are less likely to be noticed. If you dwell on a history of negatives and never see a change in that person, you can't really be surprised by that observation because it's the likelier outcome.




TheLilSquaw -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:41:19 PM)

You can look at the introduction threads as of late and see how newbies to the forums are torn apart for THEIR introductions.

And it is not a new issue IMO, it's an ongoing one. There are certain people who are like sharks in the water and it often appears that they get a blood lust of sorts.





JanahX -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:42:41 PM)

I dont always have time to be looking up every posters information - and I actually do appreciate it when someone points out that the poster has been here before and points out what the problem might be. I for one, decide whether or not to read it, and if indeed there is a problem or history.

If this was the case for everyone - then people would be going back in my thread history and pulling it up and using it against me. So far that hasnt happened.
Usually there is a direct reason why people do this sort of thing.

There was a case of a poster that posted the same thing - a few months apart, recently. Im not sure what her motive was - but she got the same round of answers that she got the first time. She just didnt like what she was hearing in both rounds. Im sure she'll be around for a third time.

As for being malicious in doing this - I dont really think that is the motive, as much as its pointing out that this individual is climbing up the same tree.




TheLilSquaw -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:42:46 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: kitkat105


If new people don't like it here, fuck off. Yep, that's about as much sympathy as you'll get from me. This is an adult messageboard.


What does this being an adult message board have to do with people being rude, disrespectful and flat out attacking others?




tazzygirl -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:44:07 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam

Seriously folks. There's a bunch of fucking Sadists on this site and we're supposed to act like it's 3rd grade?


Have I told you lately just how much I adore you?




tazzygirl -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:46:12 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw

You can look at the introduction threads as of late and see how newbies to the forums are torn apart for THEIR introductions.

And it is not a new issue IMO, it's an ongoing one. There are certain people who are like sharks in the water and it often appears that they get a blood lust of sorts.




That isnt what introductions are for.....




FrostedFlake -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:46:12 PM)

Bunch. Of. Meanies.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3999619/mpage_1/tm.htm

Where do they keep the GIF of the wagging finger.

No. Not THAT finger.




OsideGirl -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:47:37 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: RemoteUser



Is a positive history brought up as often as a negative one?


Probably not. But I will say that there have been many instances where we have applauded new posters that have interesting things to say. Psychosubmission, Athena, Kitkat, LonDom61, AllisonWilder, etc...




littlewonder -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:49:22 PM)

I think CM should start another forum called "For Sensitive Ones Only" for those who get their feelings hurt easily. This would solve a lot of problems since the only people who could post there are those who don't live in reality or they never leave their homes because they are too sensitive or it's their first time on the internet, ever.

If someone wishes to consider me part of a clique, so be it. Doesn't bother me. I've been called the "ice queen" more than one...many more times. I'm just honest. I try to be nice the first time around until the poster shows his/her true colors. Once that comes out, no holds barred...unless you're in "Introductions" and only because we're not allowed to be anything other than "sweet" and "nice".





lovethyself -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:50:21 PM)

-FR-


I am a noob, and yet I haven't recieved any of the snark that is mentioned (although I have seen it while reading the forums). In fact, I was praised for my first post, mainly because I had something to share that was relevant. I don't think that the more experienced posters on here are unwelcoming or intentionally cliquey. It's more about the attitude that the noob brings in, and how others respond to it. I'm here to learn about myself and the lifestyle, and as such want to listen to the advice offered by others with more experience. I'm sure that if that wasn't the case, I would be chastised *mmm that sounds like fun... note to self: must try that...*, but I also think that I would deserve it.

Just my 2cents from the other perspective.




Aylee -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:50:54 PM)

Maybe we should put a little note that says if you enter the message boards, don your NOMEX.




JanahX -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:52:45 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw


quote:

ORIGINAL: kitkat105


If new people don't like it here, fuck off. Yep, that's about as much sympathy as you'll get from me. This is an adult messageboard.


What does this being an adult message board have to do with people being rude, disrespectful and flat out attacking others?


Because this isnt romper room and you get what you give. You act as though people come in here all helpless and there are never any people that dont start right off the bat acting like obnoxious assholes.

thats the whole point - the majority of the shredding only happens when the poster is acting in a way that people react to. Ive never seen anyone that has come in here that has been quasi intelligent, mellow, and is sincere where theyve been picked on. People here know the difference.




RemoteUser -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:53:15 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: RemoteUser

Is a positive history brought up as often as a negative one?


Probably not. But I will say that there have been many instances where we have applauded new posters that have interesting things to say. Psychosubmission, Athena, Kitkat, LonDom61, AllisonWilder, etc...


Agreed! Which is why I won't skew to just one side of the whole thing. I'll note behaviours or work with statistics but those only work as citations for the individual, not the group (and this really is about a group). Group mentalities require a whole different approach.




Aylee -> RE: So are we a bunch of meanies? (11/10/2012 4:54:31 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I think CM should start another forum called "For Sensitive Ones Only" for those who get their feelings hurt easily. This would solve a lot of problems since the only people who could post there are those who don't live in reality or they never leave their homes because they are too sensitive or it's their first time on the internet, ever.

If someone wishes to consider me part of a clique, so be it. Doesn't bother me. I've been called the "ice queen" more than one...many more times. I'm just honest. I try to be nice the first time around until the poster shows his/her true colors. Once that comes out, no holds barred...unless you're in "Introductions" and only because we're not allowed to be anything other than "sweet" and "nice".



Are you telling me that I am never going to get my rainbow colored unicorn, no matter how many posts I make?

MEANIE!!!!!




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