RE: home birth in chains

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freedomdwarf1 -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 9:52:44 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl How do nudists keep their names off the sex offender list? Many are forced to register on the same list as rapists for "indecent exposure." A girl I went to school with is forced to register as a sex offender for indecent exposure. I read an article about a man forced to register because he was caught urinating outside. Because being naked indoors, in your own home, is not a crime. The same for naturists in a nudist camp - it's private property and not on public view. But try to do that outside where the general public could see you - that's entirely different. Bob Monkhouse was a naturist and his kids are also very level-headed and open-minded and none the worse for their experience. In their case, even the kids were naturists and they went to naturist holiday resorts as a fully naturist family.

UllrsIshtar -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 10:46:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JeffBC So have we conclusively shown that Colarme really as, as Maria describes it, "vanilla as fuck?" That... To the OP, considering how frazzled and stressed I felt when I gave birth, I wish I would have tought of the idea. I had a hospital birth, but hospitals in Belgium tend to be very accommodating to whatever they feel will keep the woman's stress levels down most, because they consider that the number one factor they can control to insure a safer birth. ETA: We had a bare butt spanking in the hospital several times during my 27 hours of contractions. It had been discussed with my gynecologist and the nurse staff beforehand, and they all encouraged it, as a method to increase endorphin flow and relax me, and put me in a more "zen" headspace. I do know that consulting about it with my physician would have resulted in him insisting that both the cuffs and the chains could be removed easily and quickly for safety reasons. Because of this, I'd recommend you to use velcro cuffs and use quick release carabiner to attach the chains to the cuffs. That way, if something should go wrong, the whole set can be removed in less than 5 seconds, but at the same time, you wife can still experience the calming and suiting pressure that the restriction will bring her while everything goes well. Good luck.

Baroana -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 10:50:33 AM)
Is the expectant mother ever going to post her thoughts, or do the chains keep her from being able to use the computer?

tazzygirl -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 10:52:11 AM)
quote: Because of this, I'd recommend you to use velcro cuffs and use quick release carabiner to attach the chains to the cuffs. Something that was already recommended before the "vanilla" comment.

UllrsIshtar -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 11:10:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tazzygirl quote: Because of this, I'd recommend you to use velcro cuffs and use quick release carabiner to attach the chains to the cuffs. Something that was already recommended before the "vanilla" comment. I didn't see velcro releases and quick release hardware have not been discussed at any point in this tread, prior to my post. Instead, some vague comments where made about how he should make sure that "they can be taken off quickly" and are soft. Most of the users chose to focus instead on the presumption that he'd use cuffs and locks that couldn't be taken off quickly, to the point that you posted: quote: ORIGINAL: tazzygirl What if you cant get them off in time.... the key breaks in the lock... the lock simply wont open.... your wife's heart stops and she needs to be shocked... When the OP at no point in time even suggested they where going to use a lock, and there therefore was no reason to believe that there would be any key to even get stuck in any lock. Velcro restraints can be taken off in the time it takes -if not way faster- to get out and charge a defibrillator so that's not a consideration. Instead of making recommendations on what the OP may safely use, most of this tread has focussed on the horror of what may go wrong if he choses the exactly wrong restraints for this sort of thing.

LafayetteLady -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 11:20:32 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Extravagasm quote: LafayetteLady Post 57: All I can say is that this is her desire. I do not think that she has to have 24/7 bondage to take on and become a slave. She just likes the feeling of bondage . . . Look at the bold parts above. Exactly who is in charge here? Sounds like she tells you what she wants to meet her "slavely" needs and you comply. So regardless of titles, cupcake, she is YOUR master, since you don't seem to have control over her. (out of order) your wife isn't capable of creating her own profile? You'd like to get to the wife, wouldn't you, LL ? But she's got him insulating her. After three pages you finally discovered what was evident on page one. That the wife calls the shots. Certainly on chain attire and birth and children, she does. (Wait a minute, is that so different from all of us?) Problem is, that's the way it is. Calling the OP 'cupcake' is silly and doesn't change things. It's not one of those threads where an OP asks us how to do BDSM, and we have to break it to em that he's not really Dom. If you're right, you're wrong, LL. Cuz to the extent wintermaster is not the power, then what's he supposed to do? But let us throw in a FURTHER curve: Society and law reserves abortion/birth decisions to a woman and her practitioners. Not to a man. As a few posters already unintendedly pointed out (post 16, 17) birthing is not about the man. DOMS ARE NO EXCEPTION. Wintermaster faces the unenviable position of feeling the tinge of male redundancy during childbirth, but not acknowledging it, due to his role play. Let's put it this way, a Dom's last resorts for enforcing his will and direction, are Physical Punishment, Deprivation, Isolation, Banishing, Terminating the relationship. Really? He should chose these for a pregnant wife, who loves him this dearly? Who are you kidding? Where are his choices right now? Here. Look. Forget chains for a moment. If a woman wants the safety of a hospital birthing, due to prior complications. But her Dom wants a home birth. What do CM folks say? Is that covered by BDSM? Of course not. If a woman wants a home birthing, but her DOM wants otherwise. What do CM folks say? Is that covered by BDSM heirchary? Of course not. Interestingly not one of predecessor posters asked wintermaster the degree of his sovereignty EVEN in BDSM matters. While they fling at him, to veto his wife (post 30, 53). Cupcake (as you indignantly call him) never IMPLIED he had full Sovereignty. And if not in BDSM, where else does he gain sovereignty over her, in birth matters? Under law? as a husband? Posters don't even have the tact to suggest he "talk her out of it". Instead many here are ridiculously expecting him to boss a pregnant woman around. LOL. Good luck posters ! . . . . Can you say frenzied hysteria ? Well, bless your little, misguided heart. We already have one posted who stated how her dom/master DID make the decision of where she would give birth. She wanted a home birth, he insisted on the hospital. If he is the "master" her pregnancy is irrelevant to that fact. It means he calls the shots, plain and simple. Apparently, that is not the case. He is nothing more than a figure head who does what she wants him to do, and she considers him her "master" because it plays well into her desires. As for your frenzied hysteria comment....many (if not most) of here take a very hard stance on the stupidity of involving non-consenting individuals in their kink, whether it be other adults in public, or worse, children. Obviously, you are not among that group.

LafayetteLady -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 11:22:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Extravagasm It is fairly established under US law and even CPS that the government does not interfere with what is or is not worn in the home, provided it is not an armament. Chains are sometimes also seen with Gothic look. This acceptance has also been argued to include casual family nudity, though uncommon, and not involved in this OP situation. The laws regarding CPS would certainly and most definitely have a huge issue with a woman having her ankles shackled in front of her children. However, since you see it differently, feel free to give it a try. Although I doubt your children would appreciate the results.

LafayetteLady -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 11:25:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JeffBC ~fast reply~ So have we conclusively shown that Colarme really as, as Maria describes it, "vanilla as fuck?" All I can say is <insert hysterical hand waving> Think of the Children!!! I gotta tell you that as the [mostly] vanilla guy on these forums and as a father of two who witnessed both births my general feeling is "the woman who's pushing a watermelon out of her fucking body gets to be chained if she fucking wants to". Insofar as her being chained at home... I haven't bought into the idea that sex is evil so I don't see the rub. So, if she felt that she wanted to have anal sex or give the guy a blow job during birth, I guess that's her prerogative for pushing a watermelon out of her vagina, right? NOT. It's quite sad that you can't see the difference between wearing ankle shackles and sex. Sex doesn't need to be evil, however, it doesn't mean that you had sex with your wife in front of your kids either, did it?

LafayetteLady -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 11:26:58 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CarolBC ~fast reply~ Wow - has this topic ever push buttons! And I thought men wearing women's panties was at the top of the Outrage-O-Meter! Little did I know there were so many rules to having children. Boy, they must be fragile! We have to protect them from germs, dirt, filth - oh, and the germs, dirt and filth of our chosen lifestyle. God forbid we allow them to have even a glimpse of a woman being submissive...their classmates will ridicule them, the teachers will report them and the authorities will be knockin' on the door shortly. I applaud wintermaster's wife for wanting to incorporate and express her submission during a most profound and important event in her and her master's life. If I were her master, I would be moved and proud (and probably blown away) by such a loving act. I see it as a woman expressing the beauty of her role: a loyal, dedicated partner with the power to give birth to a family the two of them have made together. I've heard women say that the most profound thing a couple can do is to raise a child together. It sure sounds to me like wintermaster and his wife are doing the job just fine. Her desire to wear the symbols of their relationship during childbirth - her chains - expresses her love of her role and thus her master. How could she express a love and commitment to 'her place' any better? I think her wishes are awesome, and I hope she does it. Well, isn't that special? It doesn't occur to you, obviously that the birthing process isn't about her showing "her place" as a slave.

mnottertail -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 11:28:32 AM)
Well I think that chaining a woman up to have a baby will relieve the father of some of that 'You did this to me, MOTHERFUCKER!!!!' clawing and scratching and hitting child birth pains they have to deal with in sympathy with the mother. So I am for this with both feet!!!

LafayetteLady -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 11:30:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1 quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl quote: ORIGINAL: Arturas quote: I do have an issue with his wife wearing chains in front of the kids. Not only is it inappropriate, but I'm willing to bet it will lead to an uncomfortable situation in the future. What about nudists and their children? My personal view is that I'm not really comfortable with it. But, I understand that they view that we are born naked and therefore it is how nature intended us to be. But, I bet their kids grow up with less body issues than most of the mainstream. That is different than wearing chains as proof of "slavery". We, as naturists, have never hidden ourselves from the kids. And although we don't do anything overtly sexual or extreme in front of the kids, they certainly are very aware of what is going on when we 'play' - either with just ourselves or with others. And from a personal PoV, I can honestly say that my kids have grown to be very open-minded and extremely mature in their outlook on life. She is now 19 going on 30 and he is 18 going on 25. Both are very adult-thinking and have no body issues whatsoever. We can talk about any and all subjects (even taboo ones) without the sniggers and embarassments. Heck, we had a discussion when she had her first sexual experience and he spoke to me about a boil that had come up on his dick!! I think there is far too much molly-coddling of our kids in all aspects of life. It would be a fair comment to say that we are a very liberal-minded family and it isn't everyone's cup of tea. But I'd sooner that than having kids that are uber-sheltered and can't think for themselves or are too embarassed/ashamed to approach someone if they have a problem. That said, I think the chains bit is a bit far and would have used something less hindering than chains without lessening slave aspect. But what do I know?? lol. I'm just a liberal parent [:D] I'm actually undecided on the nudity thing in front of children, but leaning more towards it not being a big deal. However, adding BDSM into the nudity....ok for the kids to see mom or dad locked in a chastity device while walking around naked? How about nipple clamps? What about a butt plug? These items, when clothed would have no affect on the children, however, when everyone is running around naked? Yea, huge difference. So you told your children under ten that mommy and daddy were going to go have sex, and they should just watch some cartoons until it was over? I don't think so. Age appropriate information is given.

SacredDepravity -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 11:51:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady quote: ORIGINAL: SacredDepravity Home birth I have no particular issue with. My issue is with the residues and dirt from the chains along with what new accumulations may occur in the birthing process. Chain is not the easiest thing to thoroughly clean quickly. That is the ill-advisement I meant. Sorryif it wasn't clear before. As an aside, I am not a proponent of the "it's all about the children now" mentality of child rearing. It gives children power within the home that they neither have a right to nor can handle. It's the inmates running the asylum, so to speak. I believe healthy kids begin and end with the healthiest possible parental unit and sometimes a child's "stuff" has to take at least a temporary back seat. I am required and want to do everything possible to meet my child's needs. Their wants or what society has turned into needs that are really just wants will have to wait more often than not. That all being said, I do believe birth really is all about the child...having the birthing process be as smooth, uncomplicated, healthy, and peaceful as possible. It is about their entry into this world and all that it means. It is a time for a family to bond together. It is not time for frivolous nonsense (not calling M/s and fetishes nonsense as such to be clear). At least for awhile, baby is pretty much the it person in the house. Most people get this. Let's get to reality here and take the kinky stuff out of it. This is about healthy mother and baby, bringing a new member into the family, and all the diapers and midnight feedings inbetween. Chains and feeling submission? You are getting ready to have a sweet, beautiful baby come into your life and forever change your world. Focus on that instead. SD The concept of "all about the children" isn't giving them "power." It is about a parent recognizing that the child's needs are paramount in the household. Say you love peanut butter. Eat it every day. But your child is severely allergic to nuts. No more peanut butter in the house for you. It's the baby needs to eat, but you are in the middle of something else. Baby eats. You are horribly tired, but your child is wide awake, you don't sleep. I don't think anyone here believes that you let the children take charge so to speak, but rather that as a parent, it is your job to make sure your child's health and well being come first, that you teach them appropriate behavior (which sometimes includes waiting). It means that your life is no longer your own because you are responsible for someone who needs to eventually become a productive, hopefully compassionate and consider, adult. I did state that a child's needs are always to be met. And while I can accept the position that if the child is hungry, he must be fed, I do not believe in dropping everything in a second and feeding him (infants excepted). They can wait the time it takes me to complete what I am trying to do in most cases. They don't like it, but they can and should do it. If I am horribly tired and the child is wide awake, I may need to call in reinforcements (dad, grandparent, friend, etc.) so I can rest. What if, in an effort to keep the child safe I nod off? I'd better take care of my needs or I am in no condition to take care of their needs. It's like putting on your own oxygen mask and THEN your child's. We are on the same page for the most part I think. My issue is that there is a fine line between meeting a child's needs and having them be important and the idea of them ALWAYS being paramount and further, crossing over into inappropriate territory. It happens all the time. It is a hard thing to keep the lid on my teen's social life a bit in order to keep the family as a whole from suffering. Some would tell me that I am stifling him or that not letting him be in the bazillion sports, clubs, and activities he desires might harm his chances of getting into the colleges he wants in the future. Horse hockey. That's the crossing the line to which I was referring. Sometimes other people's needs have to be met in order to appropriately meet the child's needs. Sometimes their needs aren't as necessary as they seem. And sometimes the child's needs aren't needs at all and a serious disruption to the important business of the home. Waiting, earning things, and learning to accept their place in authority structures are all important life lessons and a lot of kids simply aren't getting them anymore. Having some humility about our own needs as parents and keeping an appropriate balance in the household are the challenges of parents. That's all. Nothing more at all. SD

LafayetteLady -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 1:55:22 PM)
You're right, we do basically agree, we just seem to use different terminology. The number of children (not infants) that are in charge of everything boggles my mind.

Arturas -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 2:03:57 PM)
quote: It's quite sad that you can't see the difference between wearing ankle shackles and sex. I think I understand. You wear ankle shackles instead of having sex because you see them as the same and they don't require a partner.

Arturas -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 2:13:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady quote: ORIGINAL: CarolBC ~fast reply~ Wow - has this topic ever push buttons! And I thought men wearing women's panties was at the top of the Outrage-O-Meter! Little did I know there were so many rules to having children. Boy, they must be fragile! We have to protect them from germs, dirt, filth - oh, and the germs, dirt and filth of our chosen lifestyle. God forbid we allow them to have even a glimpse of a woman being submissive...their classmates will ridicule them, the teachers will report them and the authorities will be knockin' on the door shortly. I applaud wintermaster's wife for wanting to incorporate and express her submission during a most profound and important event in her and her master's life. If I were her master, I would be moved and proud (and probably blown away) by such a loving act. I see it as a woman expressing the beauty of her role: a loyal, dedicated partner with the power to give birth to a family the two of them have made together. I've heard women say that the most profound thing a couple can do is to raise a child together. It sure sounds to me like wintermaster and his wife are doing the job just fine. Her desire to wear the symbols of their relationship during childbirth - her chains - expresses her love of her role and thus her master. How could she express a love and commitment to 'her place' any better? I think her wishes are awesome, and I hope she does it. Well, isn't that special? It doesn't occur to you, obviously that the birthing process isn't about her showing "her place" as a slave. I think CarolBC's post was great. Besides, she (the OP) did not say "the birthing process" is about showing her place as a slave. She said she desires to wear the symbols of her chosen natural role. Obviously the birthing will happen no matter what role she embraces and just as obviously her role will not negatively impact the birthing process while one cannot say the same about the impact to her if she denies her role.

breagha -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 2:38:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail Well I think that chaining a woman up to have a baby will relieve the father of some of that 'You did this to me, MOTHERFUCKER!!!!' clawing and scratching and hitting child birth pains they have to deal with in sympathy with the mother. So I am for this with both feet!!! honestly... i didn't have any of those " you did this to me" moments. nor did i scratch, hit, or claw anyone. could be because ( as my gran says ) my wide hips are made for birthin babies. i have had further conversation with the OP on the topic and i kind of understand the situation more now. i know that i couldn't do it personally because of the reasons i stated earlier in the post.

OsideGirl -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 2:43:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: breagha honestly... i didn't have any of those " you did this to me" moments. nor did i scratch, hit, or claw anyone. I'm reasonably sure that if we hadn't managed to pull my step sister's husband out of her grasp, she would have succeeded in strangling him.

breagha -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 2:45:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Arturas quote: ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady quote: ORIGINAL: CarolBC ~fast reply~ Wow - has this topic ever push buttons! And I thought men wearing women's panties was at the top of the Outrage-O-Meter! Little did I know there were so many rules to having children. Boy, they must be fragile! We have to protect them from germs, dirt, filth - oh, and the germs, dirt and filth of our chosen lifestyle. God forbid we allow them to have even a glimpse of a woman being submissive...their classmates will ridicule them, the teachers will report them and the authorities will be knockin' on the door shortly. I applaud wintermaster's wife for wanting to incorporate and express her submission during a most profound and important event in her and her master's life. If I were her master, I would be moved and proud (and probably blown away) by such a loving act. I see it as a woman expressing the beauty of her role: a loyal, dedicated partner with the power to give birth to a family the two of them have made together. I've heard women say that the most profound thing a couple can do is to raise a child together. It sure sounds to me like wintermaster and his wife are doing the job just fine. Her desire to wear the symbols of their relationship during childbirth - her chains - expresses her love of her role and thus her master. How could she express a love and commitment to 'her place' any better? I think her wishes are awesome, and I hope she does it. Well, isn't that special? It doesn't occur to you, obviously that the birthing process isn't about her showing "her place" as a slave. I think CarolBC's post was great. Besides, she (the OP) did not say "the birthing process" is about showing her place as a slave. She said she desires to wear the symbols of her chosen natural role. Obviously the birthing will happen no matter what role she embraces and just as obviously her role will not negatively impact the birthing process while one cannot say the same about the impact to her if she denies her role. not wearing chains doesn't necessarily deny her role as a slave. she is slave with or without chains. the chains are just a tangible symbol of what she is and she likes wearing them. yes the birthing process will happen with or without the chains because that is the nature of things. i questioned the reason for wanting or needing the chains in place and why it might be important. Technically they could negatively impact the birthing process for many of the reasons other people posted here. i did get my answer though and i feel that if there is a safe way to do this and she feels it is important then there really isn't any reason for alarm or concern.

Arturas -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 2:50:09 PM)
quote: I'm actually undecided on the nudity thing in front of children, but leaning more towards it not being a big deal. However, adding BDSM into the nudity....ok for the kids to see mom or dad locked in a chastity device while walking around naked? How about nipple clamps? What about a butt plug? These items, when clothed would have no affect on the children, however, when everyone is running around naked? Yea, huge difference. You know, nipple clamps can be quite lovely on a woman. A butt plug? Yes. Pony tail? You bet. Well what about when your children walk in on you and yours? Seeing their mother bent over the bed bound and being sodomized with her hair held tightly by their father might affect them negatively if they were not their mother's children, raised by her and very used to her and her ways. To them this is normal just as your children walking in on you having vanilla sex makes them laugh and giggle for quite a few days when they are by themselves. This is because this is all relative, not black and white, It's all relative and if you always tend to walk around the house in nothing but heels and chastity belt and even a butt plug I suspect this would not impact the children's normal developement one iota unless you pretended you did not from the beginning and they suddenly found out you did.

breagha -> RE: home birth in chains (3/22/2013 2:51:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CarolBC . God forbid we allow them to have even a glimpse of a woman being submissive...their classmates will ridicule them, the teachers will report them and the authorities will be knockin' on the door shortly. i know that in the community i live in, if my daughter casually mentioned to a teacher that mom spends the day in chains, there would be an investigation. i don't know that it would end with me losing my child or anything like that. there would be people looking into what is going on and why she would say something like that. Mandated reporters are required by law to report anything they think might be harmful or inappropriate to a child. Most teachers in NY state are mandated reporters, as are most day care providers.

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