Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness.

Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (Full Version)

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ARIES83 -> Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (6/30/2013 8:10:14 PM)
When you cage or tie someone up, do you consider what might happen if something were to happen to you? Do you have measures in place for the one in bondage to free themselves? This topic is a tangent from this thread: http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=4483092 I personally think there are situations where I would have some kind of provision for if I had a heartattack etc... But having a phone on the wall of a slaves cage is probably a bit much for me... I've tied/hung people up and left them so I could go and do other things before... Sure I could of had a stroke or something... But so could I whilst driving them somewhere on the freeway or the like...

SimplyMichael -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (6/30/2013 8:16:37 PM)
I always have at least paramedics on standby and a medivac chopper on ready alert. Just in case...

UllrsIshtar -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (6/30/2013 8:34:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ARIES83 When you cage or tie someone up, do you consider what might happen if something were to happen to you? Yes, always. I consider any time I restrain somebody or am restrained in a way that self-escape is impossible to be on the edge play side of thing. Nevertheless I consider it an acceptable risk under certain circumstances. quote: ORIGINAL: ARIES83 Do you have measures in place for the one in bondage to free themselves? Anytime it doesn't impede the desired play, yes. I usually operate with a key sealed into an envelop whenever locks are involved. It's a secure way to enable somebody to get out, while at the same time ensuring that it would be impossible for the Top not to know that escape happened (and can thus enforce certain consequences). However, in some modes of play that I enjoy engaging in such fail safes aren't possible. For instance, I've recently been experimenting with sleeping in intolerable conditions (think chained naked overnight on a concrete cold basement floor, or in a cage far to cramped to allow stretching out) and I've found that I don't have the willpower beyond a certain point to not employ escape options in that sort of situation. Considering that I'm still intent on engaging in that type of play, and it's intently satisfying to do so, the only option is to not allow possibilities for escape (which is proving to be a challenge all upon itself, considering that last time I manage to get the screws out of the anchor by means of a penknife that was inadvertently left within reach...). I know I'm at risk when doing this, but it's a risk that I consider rather minute compared to other risks like driving, I engage in on a daily basis.

Missokyst -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (6/30/2013 8:37:23 PM)
I am pretty much of an escape artist so normally nothing is in play for my escape but me. That said I think it is lame not to have something in mind given an emergency. I mean, taking your senario about a car accident, well, unless it is in an isolated area a passing stranger might offer aid. Will that happen in your home if people don't know you have someone caged? This would be assuming your playmate is not saavy enough to have his or her bases covered by letting people know where they were. Which is not so odd given that people don't tend to advertise their interests. As far as the phone goes, I think people are making way more of that than they should. Let's present two cases here: 1. Playmate is a regular partner that one TRUSTS not to use the phone unless it is an emergency. 2. Playmate is a noob or stranger and may opt out when panic sets in. I don't see anything wrong with safegaurds in either of those two senarios. Unless of course it would ruin the illusion of danger. What a bummer. [8\|]

Duskypearls -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (6/30/2013 8:47:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ARIES83 When you cage or tie someone up, do you consider what might happen if something were to happen to you? Do you have measures in place for the one in bondage to free themselves? This topic is a tangent from this thread: http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=4483092 I personally think there are situations where I would have some kind of provision for if I had a heartattack etc... But having a phone on the wall of a slaves cage is probably a bit much for me... I've tied/hung people up and left them so I could go and do other things before... Sure I could of had a stroke or something... But so could I whilst driving them somewhere on the freeway or the like... Aries, I do not in anyway think you lax in such matters of safety in regards to others, in fact, quite the contrary. The only difference in your statement being you've intentionally taken this person, and responsibility for them, into your life and activities. Would you think that might make you more responsible or not? Honesty is ALWAYS preferred, whether I agree with or like the answer or not.

UllrsIshtar -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (6/30/2013 9:02:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Duskypearls The only difference in your statement being you've intentionally taken this person, and responsibility for them, into your life and activities. So does somebody drive with a passenger in the back. If you're doing 75mph and you've got a passenger in the back or in the seat next to you, you're risking their life far more in case you could have a stroke or a heart attack than a sane person ever will when incapacitating somebody through bondage. Having a couple days of chance that somebody will find you chained up in a basement with a death top next to you on the floor is far lower risk than than slatting against the concrete pillars on an overpass at 75mph because that same top had a stroke while driving... That's not to say that people shouldn't negotiate risks when they can... it's just that the idea of it being insanely dangerous to choose not to negotiate the risks is somewhat of a serious exaggeration...

ARIES83 -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (6/30/2013 9:35:40 PM)
Dusky/Missokyst, Hmm, not sure what your getting at... I do of course have the safety of others on my mind when that safety is in my hands. I'm neither up or down on failsafes, but I think there are obsessive/obtrusive ways to do that, and unobtrusive/reasonable ways... And of course situation and location changes a lot. I'd be interested in finding out more of peoples energency provisions involving bondage.

Missokyst -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (6/30/2013 9:56:20 PM)
I think my point was specifically driven because people had such an extreme reaction to the phone in the cage, BOTH sides, for and against. If people are in a relationship and want to put a phone in there it is reasonable to assume they know their playmate enough to know its not going to be accessed without damn good reason. And if they don't know their partner it may give their playmate some peace of mind. For me the reactions in the other thread were over the top all the way around. And honestly since it was RS's cage he seems saavy enough to know what he is doing and if he put the phone there he must have his reasons. As far as regular failsafes go, the norm varies.

hrxxx -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 7:03:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael I always have at least paramedics on standby and a medivac chopper on ready alert. Just in case... You are insane! It's too dangerous! I do ONLY bondag sessions at the hospital in the IR

TNDommeK -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 7:08:25 AM)
There's always someone (hubby) knowing what I do, when I do it. So if something were to happen, he would know.

hrxxx -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 7:17:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TNDommeK There's always someone (hubby) knowing what I do, when I do it. So if something were to happen, he would know. In Denmark you get free first aid course, almost no matter what other course to take, I have taken the first aid four times.

Arturas -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 7:28:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ARIES83 When you cage or tie someone up, do you consider what might happen if something were to happen to you? Do you have measures in place for the one in bondage to free themselves? This topic is a tangent from this thread: http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=4483092 I personally think there are situations where I would have some kind of provision for if I had a heartattack etc... But having a phone on the wall of a slaves cage is probably a bit much for me... I've tied/hung people up and left them so I could go and do other things before... Sure I could of had a stroke or something... But so could I whilst driving them somewhere on the freeway or the like... One never leaves the side of anyone bound and also has medical blunt point scissors ready to cut the bound subject free in an instant should it be necessary. I don't cage for any length of time; It is obvious this would be endangering the subject's life should a fire break out or I expire during that session. Leaving a cell phone in the cage does not save the subject if they have a heart attack or a fire breaks out in that room. These actions are the mark of someone who should not dom anyone.

Moonlightmaddnes -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 8:23:12 AM)
Nope so if something happened I guess I would stay tied up until someone came around. It would not be too long since I am convinced my daughter has some sort of radar that tells her when we are playing. I can just see her now going to school and telling all her friends how she found mamma all tied up.

ARIES83 -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 8:47:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Arturas One never leaves the side of anyone bound and also has medical blunt point scissors ready to cut the bound subject free in an instant should it be necessary. I understand the concerns behind the sentiment, and they are quite sensible concerns. I definitely wouldn't advocate less safety or less thought, care, planning... There is just some... I don't know... ...That girl tied up on the bed behind you, what was her provision for escape had you died (from, IDK... explosive decompression or something...) just as you took that picture. What about overnight/bedtime restraint/confinement? I can't disagree with anyone who is saying it's negligent to leave a bound person unattended and the like, but I'm also not agreeing with it if that makes sense. [8D] It's not fence sitting It's writers block, I'm writing this in between sets, bloods not finding it's way to tha brain atm.[:o]

DesFIP -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 9:04:36 AM)
Like moonlightmadness, our kids seem to have radar that causes them to come home the moment we think we have some privacy. It would be embarrassing, but if he had a heart attack, I could get one of them to come in and help. I might however, wind up scarring them for life.

hrxxx -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 9:13:36 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP Like moonlightmadness, our kids seem to have radar that causes them to come home the moment we think we have some privacy. It would be embarrassing, but if he had a heart attack, I could get one of them to come in and help. I might however, wind up scarring them for life. Do what you must do for assure safety. But make sure you have enough money for therapy

DesFIP -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 9:21:25 AM)
Hardly. It was a joke. They see him being in charge. They would not be horrified by consensual sex that two people in love have. I raised them better. After my mother died, I cleaned out her sex toys while emptying the apartment. It didn't scar me either.

hrxxx -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 9:25:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP Hardly. It was a joke. They see him being in charge. They would not be horrified by consensual sex that two people in love have. I raised them better. After my mother died, I cleaned out her sex toys while emptying the apartment. It didn't scar me either. I know it was a joke, and so was mine lol I would not like to think about my mother, and sex toy at the same time

ARIES83 -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 9:26:14 AM)
quote: Ishtar: For instance, I've recently been experimenting with sleeping in intolerable conditions (think chained naked overnight on a concrete cold basement floor, or in a cage far to cramped to allow stretching out) and I've found that I don't have the willpower beyond a certain point to not employ escape options in that sort of situation. Ishtar, I think we may be on the same page with some things... Would you be able to elaborate a bit on the differences you experience between your self-imposed/self-enforced restraint/confinement and whatever alternatives you take part in?

Moonlightmaddnes -> RE: Bondage/Confinement Ethics and Preparedness. (7/1/2013 10:26:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP Like moonlightmadness, our kids seem to have radar that causes them to come home the moment we think we have some privacy. It would be embarrassing, but if he had a heart attack, I could get one of them to come in and help. I might however, wind up scarring them for life. I think I scarred my oldest already, sadly. When my middle girl was a baby I was putting her clothes away. Her room and my son's room are next to each other. I could hear him talking on his cell phone then he says , " Oh you think that's bad, I can hear my parents having sex. God they are kinky." I turned so freaking red. I thought he was asleep!!!

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