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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/1/2013 10:59:35 PM   
njlauren


Posts: 1577
Joined: 10/1/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Quite often, I feel as though I'm in the minority of folks who think people should be encouraged to go to munches, kink related educational events, or parties where CM participants meet up and have fun. This is something that has changed on My time here on CM. I couldn't begin to tell folks how many threads were on this site in the past that went on for pages about people planning on getting together or talking about what a good time they had.

No. Munches are not for everyone. There are a lot of folks who have decided that they are not for them and that makes sense to Me because that's a personal decision based on someone's own situation. As much as I think it's a positive experience to have the opportunity to get to know other kinksters in a social setting, not everybody sees it that way, so I try to step back. (I am not always successful.)

Yet, I think it's becoming a little more than that. I think we've got at least some members of the boards who specifically discourage others based on looking down at those who do attend. Their distaste of going to kink gatherings seems to produce comments that seem like they don't even want to give any kind of encouragement to those who might be thinking of going to their first to judge for themselves.

While I have My own suspicions about why some posters do that, I'm going to reserve that part for now. I'm sure some of them will come up through the course of the thread. I'm just going to point a few things out from this side.

When I try to encourage folks to get out to their local community, the truth of the matter is that it doesn't benefit Me. The chances of anybody going to their first event that would actually be in My local community so we have higher numbers of attendees is really pretty slim. It's not because I'm looking for "fresh meat" or that it's because I'm trying to get new play partners for Me in the door. I don't need to fill chairs at the presentations that I give or that I need more people to teach. I've got enough of all of that right here in My own community, so there's really nothing in it for Me if people take the advice to go to their local community or not.

It really is because of the bottom line that I hope the person who takes that advice of going to an event gets the benefits for themselves. Whatever positive you get, whether it be new friendships, get to learn new things, or even if you just get to see that people at munches don't all have two heads, there might be, hopefully, something in it for you.

Now I'd like you to ask yourself what the motivations might be for those who discourage you. Are there situations where you *not* giving the kink community a shot that might benefit the detractors? Is it possible that not everybody is discouraging folks from giving it a shot that are coming from some less than selfless motivations?




I think personally that many of the detractors do so because they are afraid to actually go out and meet people in public, many of them are so worried that someone will know they are into BD/SM , that they wouldn't dare go to a public event or whatever....to cover for that, they scoff at the idea, say 'who needs it' and so forth. I can't say that is everyone who is negative about them, some people simply find them not their cup of tea, or had bad experiences, but having seen the messages I think you are talking about, LP, I get the harsh vibe, the judgement, and I think it is because they are too scared themselves to do it, so they basically pooh pooh it. Kind of like the kid who isn't picked for the sports team, and when someone asks them about it, they say "awe, it was stupid, who wants to do that?"

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/1/2013 11:00:29 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2
.................My sense is the site is catering to the fin dommes for the purpose of selling it as a sex worker/client pay site, the TOS carefully written for that purpose, and the more fin domme-populated it is, the higher the eventual selling price.


Actually CollarMe's rated sales value has dropped by almost a $100,000.00 because their rank fell by over 500 points. I have always said content drives traffic. Shit on the content and you shit on the traffic.


ETA: added original comment for context.

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 8/1/2013 11:05:08 PM >

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/1/2013 11:00:42 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline 		~ Fast Reply ~

I don't go to munches. I've been to one munch and a handful of MAST meetings years ago. They just weren't for me. The only thing I had in common with most of those folks was the D/s aspect of the relationship, and that wasn't enough to keep my interest. They just weren't into most of the things I like to do, or the things that spark my interest.

The Mister & I have friends who are M/s like we are, and who occasionally host "discussion dinners" centered around talking about a particular aspect of this type of relationship dynamic, and we enjoy those. I do enjoy talking to them and getting insight on the various different ways we all conduct our relationships. But then we also get together with them to BBQ, go out to dinner, and just hang out.

I'm not opposed to munches and play parties, and I don't discourage them, but they're not for us, at least not right now in our lives. I haven't seen a lot of munch discouragement here, but then I don't read every thread, either, so I could definitely be missing that. I do see people who have said they don't have an interest or don't like them, and I figure they're just adding their own personal opinions into the mix.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/1/2013 11:15:39 PM   
AAkasha


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Why do people discourage others from playing online or engaging in cyber of any kind?


Akasha

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 3:39:11 AM   
Dom480


Posts: 2
Joined: 6/15/2011
Status: offline 		Financial motivations aren't limited to fin-dommes. Amazon wishlists and such have been creeping into profiles of young submissive women over the last year or so as well. It's not very common, yet.

I've been here a couple of years. This is my first forum post. I don't participate in forums anywhere, on any topic, partly because I don't care to and partly because I don't often have time to spend this way. I pop over here now and then when a headline catches my eye on the other side and on rare occasions just to browse. I appreciate the intent of those who post here out of a sense of community and knowledge sharing. Given my limited time in this forum, my perspective is that of an outsider and I make no claim to any expertise on the quality or trends of the forum content.

The impression I've gained over a couple years infrequently reading here is that "go to a munch" is the rubber-stamp answer to a couple of types of threads and it's almost always offered by the same rubber-stampers. Two general categories many of those threads fall into are "Hey, I'm new. Any tips?" and "WTF why won't those bitches talk to me?". The latter of which is often phrased as something about fakes.

For the first type, I've always felt the "go to a munch" answer was okay advice. It was, in my opinion, often pushed harder than it needed to be and often with a tone suggesting it's the only respectable option. For that reason, to some extent I agree with seekingreality's be-all-and-end-all comment earlier in this thread.

For the second type, I initially thought the "go to a munch" answer was a cop out. It looked to me as though active long-timers were intentionally ignoring the problems with the other half of this site, excusing it. I later came to realize most who are active on this side don't spend much time on that side. So I'm willing to chalk it up to blissful ignorance.

I know the fakes topic is old news around here. I'm not trying to turn this conversation into that one. Bear with me for a few paragraphs as this isn't whining or bitching but a logical analysis and I do have a point that ties back to the fin-domme topic. For those of you who still don't want to hear it, I'll visually mark that part of my post so you can skip it.

>>>> BEGIN FAKES ANALYSIS
It used to be most the fakes were real people playing games. There were occasional profiles where the [insert whatever type of foreigner you like] couldn't figure out the difference between kg and lbs and Google translate didn't do a very good job on their text. Those and some other types were obvious and they weren't the majority.

Many months ago I read on collarmefakes.com that a mod here admitted CM generates bogus profiles just to keep the stats up, in competition with Fet. To keep dominant males coming back would be another good reason for CM to do this. I don't believe everything I read on the internet. I don't automatically disbelieve it either. In the last few months I've noticed two specific things supporting that idea.

The Criteria
First, in the Newest Local Users view, the tooltips when you hover over a profile image display both the date/time the person joined and the date/time they were last online, to the minute. I haven't looked for them but I haven't noticed those details, to the minute, in other views. What I noticed is the profiles are very often created and last online in the same minute or one minute apart. This would mean several humans created profiles, entered a paragraph or two of text, posted a picture and selected some interests (bird watching usually a favorite -- America's favorite pastime, apparently) and immediately logged off, all within 0-119 seconds. Unlikely. So either people outside CM have broken the captcha (not impossible) and are generating fake profiles, or CM is doing it.

Second, in the last few months there have been days where there's a barrage of new profiles, all of attractive young submissives with a single photo safe enough for Facebook and a paragraph of really generic profile text making no reference to anything BDSM. Each of these profiles has a random background color but always the default font and black text. The profiles are spread across the US geographically.

These are in addition to obvious fakes you see over and over again... "This is humiliating for me..." followed by some crap about her rich parents and spoiled lifestyle. Or my favorite, the one that lists a bunch of bdsm activities and measurements including her "moderate [random size] breasts". Also, those of us in the US always feel the need to point out our state is in the USA. And for a town with 886 households, Bee Branch, Arkansas is almost entirely hot, young subs if you count the profiles here. I really need to move there!

The Experiment
Two weeks ago I began an experiment. Any time I see a profile that fits any of these criteria, I hide it. I use Google image search on every remaining new profile within my filter (18-45 female sub in the US, willing to relocate) and the majority have matches on free porn sites, Russian bride sites, romance scam warning sites and similar. I hide each of those. I even went through several hundred profiles sorted by last online more or less mindlessly in the background while on the phone one night. Due to my personal tastes, I also hid very large women and African American women but these were a very low percentage compared to the others. Due to their tastes, I also hid lesbians.

The Result
You know what's left after hiding all of those? Between 1 and 3 profiles per day that I couldn't immediately discard as fake. This doesn't mean they're real. It just means I couldn't immediately prove (by criteria acceptable to me) they're fake. Let's assume they're real. How many of those women never log in again after the first 100 abusive and often really twisted emails? Most of the women I met here with whom I still maintain friendships didn't stay here longer than a couple of months, if that.
>>>> END FAKES ANALYSIS

My Point
It's been suggested the fin-domme populace has grown large and vocal enough to taint CollarChat. I'd suggest CM doesn't have much other human female populace so the fin-domme populace is a larger percentage of the general populace than it appears. If CM got rid of the fin-dommes, there would be almost no real female profiles and eventually guys would stop showing up and ad revenue would dry up. I think it's heading that way anyway.

The other side of the site has lost nearly all of it's value for me. What I'm reading here seems to indicate active long-timers on the CollarChat side of the site feel its value is also declining. Looking back, I've met just as many women with compatible interests on OKCupid and PlentyOfFish in the last two-three years as I met here. I suspect it won't be long before I stop frequenting this site. Fet is an option, though they intentionally make it a pain to seek out people to meet and I find the fact that everyone has 36 different types of relationships with 12 different people ridiculous. As a web developer, it's tempting to create a competing site. I really don't have time to dedicate to that.


< Message edited by Dom480 -- 8/2/2013 4:14:35 AM >

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 5:23:50 AM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline 		Thanks for this thoughtful and interesting post. Incredibly, an interesting one about fakes! It adds to my sense that it is time to make a real effort to make Fet a place for me and to give up on CM. Two major long-time presences on the forums are out and the other heading that way, and every day new fin dommes post their introductions. Not much left here for men not interested in paying for it or for women not charging a fee. Wish we had heard from you sooner!

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Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 7:16:38 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I wanted to take a moment to thank everyone who has participated in the thread so far. I didn't want to jump in too early to answer questions too early in the discussion because I wanted folks to have a chance to make comments without being swayed. After reading all of the responses, I can say that just about every question that anyone has asked has been answered by one of the other posters on the thread. Some of them with quite a bit of detail and I'd like to especially those those who were willing to invest so much in doing that. To anybody who asked a question early on, if you return and read all of the responses to it, I think your answer is in there, somewhere.

I will apologize for not putting specific examples on this thread where comments/quotes were made on other threads. A number of them have been listed by other posters without embarrassing anyone who has made them. I figured I had a better shot at the thread staying up that way.

I hope the thread has been interesting to those who have read and responded to it. Also, I hope anybody who would like to continue commenting will do so.

As a side note, I'd like to thank the folks on this thread and elsewhere who have started and hosted munches, parties, and events over the years.


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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 7:28:25 AM   
theshytype


Posts: 1600
Status: offline 		Still being relatively new to the site I have noticed a change in the boards. Or, the newness wore off.

I was attracted to this site for the forums and most particularly the "General BDSM" and "Ask a..." sections. Admittingly, I don't visit them often now and when I do it's not for very long. They do seem mostly polluted with posts surrounding financial and discussions of fakes. Whether it is a legitimate kink or not, does not matter to me. I enjoy reading about what others enjoy but after one thread of many pages, I've taken away enough I need to know.

It does sadden me that the people I would love to learn from, on topics I would enjoy reading, are being pushed away.
Since I don't see changing my husbands mind in the foreseeable future, my options of learning more and discussions are limited.
I have a difficult enough time getting him to a neighborhood BBQ.

Having read this thread and the comments, I have a little more understanding of some people's push towards munches and other social events. I believe RS is absolutely right. Seeing so many threads regarding pro and fin Dommes, I did start to wonder if perhaps the bulk of the community were commercialized.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 8:31:21 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
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From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

It does sadden me that the people I would love to learn from, on topics I would enjoy reading, are being pushed away.

You can usually find them under the same screen names at FetLife. Although others do, I won't publish on Fet because their software is atrocious.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 9:56:26 AM   
seekingreality


Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dom480


Two weeks ago I began an experiment. Any time I see a profile that fits any of these criteria, I hide it. I use Google image search on every remaining new profile within my filter (18-45 female sub in the US, willing to relocate) and the majority have matches on free porn sites, Russian bride sites, romance scam warning sites and similar. I hide each of those. I even went through several hundred profiles sorted by last online more or less mindlessly in the background while on the phone one night. Due to my personal tastes, I also hid very large women and African American women but these were a very low percentage compared to the others. Due to their tastes, I also hid lesbians.

The Result
You know what's left after hiding all of those? Between 1 and 3 profiles per day that I couldn't immediately discard as fake. This doesn't mean they're real. It just means I couldn't immediately prove (by criteria acceptable to me) they're fake. Let's assume they're real. How many of those women never log in again after the first 100 abusive and often really twisted emails? Most of the women I met here with whom I still maintain friendships didn't stay here longer than a couple of months, if that.
>>>> END FAKES ANALYSIS


I think you're mixing up two things. There are lots of fake profiles, and they're mostly women or pretending to be women.

I don't think that is related to the fact that women here are bombarded by emails, and a lot of from wacko guys, so that turns them off. But then women complain about being inundated by emails from wacko guys on POF and OKcupid too.

Personally, I think people worry too much about this stuff. I'll skim the profiles here. I can immediately tell 99% of the fakes. I send a note to those women that interest me. The 1% of the fakes I missed reveal themselves instantly, so I ignore them. It's not a big deal. I understand the odds of connecting with someone here are small -- but that's true of vanilla sites too.

You're always going to have these kinds of issues on free personals sites.

There are always people on the Internet who want to police the world, or who wring their hands about how people act on the Internet. If you choose not to let that stuff bother you, the problem pretty much disappears, in my experience. I think all the crap on CM that people complain about is just natural Internet stuff -- the crap will always be there. Your choice is to not use the Internet, not let it bother you, or spend a lot of time being vexed, I choose the second.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 10:08:31 AM   
seekingreality


Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: theshytype

Still being relatively new to the site I have noticed a change in the boards. Or, the newness wore off.

I was attracted to this site for the forums and most particularly the "General BDSM" and "Ask a..." sections. Admittingly, I don't visit them often now and when I do it's not for very long. They do seem mostly polluted with posts surrounding financial and discussions of fakes. Whether it is a legitimate kink or not, does not matter to me. I enjoy reading about what others enjoy but after one thread of many pages, I've taken away enough I need to know.



I think that's typical of anonymous Internet forums open to the general public. They can be fun when you have that first thrill of discovery. But after a while, you often find the forums are dominated by a small number of people saying the same things about the same topics over and over. I find that's true of CM, but it's not a criticism of this site or the people on it, really. It's just the nature of Internet forums.

I tend to come here in bursts. For whatever reason, I'll get in a CM forum mood and participate in a lot of threads for a short period. But then I get bored, go away, and don't return for a while. When I come back, I find it's pretty much the same people, topics, and comments as when I left, but I have been gone long enough to be willing to go over the same terrain again for a little bit.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 10:28:28 AM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline 		I was nearly asleep when I first read this post, but it was so interesting I've been ruminating over it all morning. I had never considered the difficulty from the Collarme ownership side of the evidently vast disparity between number of men and number of women here. Of course a dearth of women will discourage men from coming here eventually. Stepping up their game from the "on your knees slut" initial approach isn't going to help them if there is maybe 1 real woman for every 100 men on this site.

This is probably where the OP comes into play; go out into the community to meet people in person if the online odds are lousy. Lots of us for a variety of reasons aren't going to do that; I'm probably not the only woman not inclined to attend public kink events alone. That's why the demise of collarme is so frustrating, as I thought I might be able to continue to meet people here. And the stories of members who have met their partners here just fuels that fantasy.

Doesn't mean I think the creation of fake female profiles is the answer. If men in the lifestyle generally greatly outnumber the women in it, the problem may very well be insoluble.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 10:35:28 AM   
orgasmdenial12


Posts: 613
Joined: 9/18/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP


quote:

ORIGINAL: orgasmdenial12
I often see people claim that they have no interest in the lifestyle or the community - yet they obviously do because they are participating in the online lifestyle / community. I'm not sure what they see as threatening about real life events (I find them much friendlier than online) but I certainly would like to see more of them taking a deep breath and getting out and about.


That's one hell of an assumption. That anyone who doesn't play in public feels threatened.


That's one hell of a misinterpretation. I said real life events, not real life play parties. There are many ways to meet kinksters without playing in public and without attending a play party.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 10:38:09 AM   
orgasmdenial12


Posts: 613
Joined: 9/18/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality


quote:

ORIGINAL: orgasmdenial12

I often see people claim that they have no interest in the lifestyle or the community - yet they obviously do because they are participating in the online lifestyle / community. I'm not sure what they see as threatening about real life events (I find them much friendlier than online) but I certainly would like to see more of them taking a deep breath and getting out and about.



You are making quite a few assumptions.

For example, I like to spend a few minutes now and then popping online and participating in forums. I can do it when I like, and spend as little or as much time as I like. It's an OK way to pass a minute here and there during the day.

I don't have an interest in going to places for discussions in person. It's not because I am shy or afraid or threatened. That just takes significantly more time, and that's not how I want to spend my time.


I'm not making any assumptions at all about why you do or don't participate in the real life community. I was referring to those who claimed they had 'no interest in the lifestyle or community' and making the point that online IS part of the community.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 11:46:59 AM   
HarryVanWinkle


Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
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quote:

Some seem impartial, some strongly against, and some strongly for almost so much so it sounds as if it's the only way you can learn and meet others.


I fall into the latter category. Except, I don't think it's the only way you can learn and meet others, but I do believe it is by far the SAFEST way to learn and meet others.

Many of the things some of us like to do can be dangerous if don't wrong and require skill to do safely. Some of them, you simply cannot learn to do by reading or watching a video. The only good way to learn them is by doing them with somebody who knows what she's doing watching and saying, "No, don't do it that way. Do it this way."

There are many people who avoid the community for good and valid reasons. They already have partners, don't engage in heavy play, have been to munches and found them boring, etc. But, there are also people who avoid it for invalid reasons. They're so locked up in their twisted fantasy world that they can't deal with real world BDSM. They're "One True Wayers" who can't stand the diversity of ways in the community. Or they're abusive predators looking for fresh meat to victimize. The latter type don't last long in the community, they get exposed almost immediately. And, it's to avoid the latter type that I highly recommend that new, unpartnered people, especially submissives and women, who are the most likely to be targeted by predators, to get involved with the community.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 12:32:50 PM   
HarryVanWinkle


Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
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quote:

Especially play parties, which often exclude monogamists


I have to dispute this. I suppose it depends on how you define "monogamists". If you're talking about people who have moral objections to anybody playing or having sex with someone to whom he's not exclusively partnered, I suppose you're right. If you're talking about people who simply won't themselves play or have sex with anybody but one partner, I have to disagree. I have been to a lot of play parties. I've never heard of one that excludes monogamists. I've never been to one that discourages them. I've never been to one that requires anybody to play with anybody he doesn't want to play with. I've never been to one that requires anybody to play at all.

At most of the play parties I've ever been to, monogamists have been a large percentage of the attendees. Some go, socialize with everybody and play with their partners. Some go, socialize, watch, get ideas and don't play at all at the parties. I've never seen any of them be excluded, discouraged, or disrespected because of their monogamy.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 1:17:01 PM   
Dom480


Posts: 2
Joined: 6/15/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality

I think you're mixing up two things. There are lots of fake profiles, and they're mostly women or pretending to be women.

I don't think that is related to the fact that women here are bombarded by emails, and a lot of from wacko guys, so that turns them off. But then women complain about being inundated by emails from wacko guys on POF and OKcupid too.


I didn't mean to suggest the unfriendly welcome submissive women get here is the cause of the huge number of fakes. My intent was to point out that once you remove fakes from the equation there's a very low number of new sub female profiles created. Of those few, some portion are immediately turned off from the site due to the content of their inboxes, leaving even fewer.

quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality

Personally, I think people worry too much about this stuff. I'll skim the profiles here. I can immediately tell 99% of the fakes. I send a note to those women that interest me. The 1% of the fakes I missed reveal themselves instantly, so I ignore them. It's not a big deal. I understand the odds of connecting with someone here are small -- but that's true of vanilla sites too.


I agree. And there's an up side. Those of us who have a clue can invest our time in real people while everyone else sends mail to the fakes.

quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality

You're always going to have these kinds of issues on free personals sites.

There are always people on the Internet who want to police the world, or who wring their hands about how people act on the Internet. If you choose not to let that stuff bother you, the problem pretty much disappears, in my experience. I think all the crap on CM that people complain about is just natural Internet stuff -- the crap will always be there. Your choice is to not use the Internet, not let it bother you, or spend a lot of time being vexed, I choose the second.


I agree. It doesn't bother me. Assuming CM isn't directly responsible for the fakes there are things they could do to reduce them. Using ip address to determine approximate location and only allowing the profile to be posted claiming a location within some range of that is one example. That solution isn't problem-free. There's no way to completely stop it though without becoming a locked-down site that excludes people by default.

As for the decline in quality on this side of the site, I'd guess the only way to stop that would be to decouple it from the other side -- disconnect them and re-brand one of them. The potential problem there is whether people still find this forum and sign up.

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RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 3:07:08 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

I think some submissive men, especially, seek online relationships first because they suffer from social anxiety on top of debilitating shyness and inexperience in groups. Whether or not their curiosity in femdom relationships came before the social anxiety or after it, or because of it, or whatever, is up for discussion - who knows and it does not matter.

Some of these men are lovely and sweet as ever, with so much to give and huge hearts, but they are inexperienced and some are afraid to even leave their house and the idea of going to a place full of kinky people and just "mingle" is not going to fly. They have to stick online. They aren't going to go to a vanilla mixer let alone a kinky one.

I think there is a very high correlation between subs who are either shy (crippling levels), introverted, have social anxiety, don't have friends they can go with, and don't want people to know they are kinky. This is why they don't want to go to munches.

Akasha

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(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 3:15:30 PM   
seekingreality


Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dom480


I agree. It doesn't bother me. Assuming CM isn't directly responsible for the fakes there are things they could do to reduce them. Using ip address to determine approximate location and only allowing the profile to be posted claiming a location within some range of that is one example. That solution isn't problem-free. There's no way to completely stop it though without becoming a locked-down site that excludes people by default.

As for the decline in quality on this side of the site, I'd guess the only way to stop that would be to decouple it from the other side -- disconnect them and re-brand one of them. The potential problem there is whether people still find this forum and sign up.


From CM's perspective, I doubt decoupling the personal ads from the forums would be all that beneficial. The forums and chat, from a business standpoint, only exist to support the profiles and personal ads, which is where ads are posted and most of the sites revenue is generated from. The forums by themselves probably have limited value. Like it or not, CM is and always has been primarily been a place for personal ads. The forum is just a throw-in.

I am not sure how much CM could do to cut down on fakes in an environment where anonymous people are posting kinky ads. You or I might know, for example, that there is a 99.999999% chance that a profile with a model-like photo is a fake, but I don't think how you could reasonably remove a profile because you found the photo on it too good looking.

I think CM will simply continue to take the approach of "buyer beware." The only reason they would make a change is if they see a significant drop in users. As long as people keep coming to the sight, it won't matter if they grumble about scammers and financial domes.

(in reply to Dom480)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Why discourage others? - 8/2/2013 4:58:25 PM   
ThundersCry54


Posts: 71
Joined: 5/6/2013
Status: offline 		I would rather encourage people to *find* whatever they *think* they are looking for rather than to discourage them...come on!

For some it`s a fantasy for some it`s...not.

Personally, I got sick of meeting people from the net in the 90`s and being duped...lol

I had the desire to go forward, and had a desire to learn soooo...I moved to where groups were. And that meant I had to go to *munches*...

I don`t live where any are at the moment, but..I would not hesitate to go to them again if I lived where they were. If that were a need of mine.

I liked what MarieB had said about letting *it* go to your head...that was a huge turn off to me watching some think they were all that and a bag of chips. Those kinds I had nooooooo interest even talking...to.

Makes little difference to me what path people choose to follow, as AAkasha stated, theres even a need for some to only experience online.

Whatever trips people triggers!

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 60
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