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RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 1:23:38 PM   
MariaB


Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
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I really hope you sort this out. Can you come clean with your family ? that would make everything much easier for you.

Last year I started getting text messages that suggested we were having an affair. I showed them to Steve who put his number into google. Up popped the guys florist business in Surrey along with his full name and full address.

Thats how easy it can be to get someone's details. In that particular instance I text him back using his full name and said if he didn't stop some men would be paying a visit to xxx his full address xxx.

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(in reply to punisher440)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 1:24:54 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hellrider1

Hindsight is a wonderful thing.... I was totally new on here with no experience. He has been a Dom for over 30 years. Yes, he said that I was too private and that I had to learn to talk about things and to hand details over, as a Dom would expect to know everything about his sub...etc.... He knew what to ask and I was totally green... lesson learned. Once I have sorted this matter I will leave this lifestyle.



Leave the lifestyle? Because of one idiot? I understand that you may well be very skeptical at this point, but you came here for a reason. I am fairly certain that reason was not to get into a situation like this.

If you want to learn about things, there are some very, very helpful people on this site. Ask questions and get involved in conversations. Don't just dismiss your desires because you ran into the wrong person.


_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Hellrider1)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 1:29:45 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
Get a solicitor. Have him threaten a lawsuit charging him with mental pain and anguish seeking hundreds of thousands of pounds in damages. Plus the solicitor can help you deal with the police.

Okay, you had sex with this guy. That's not illegal. But threatening you, coercing you, harassing you, all those are illegal. You need to print out copies of any messages you've gotten from him stating his plans.

And tell your employer that you had a brief relationship and after breaking it off the guy went nuts and may contact them. If so, you want copies of what he said to add to the police case and lawsuit.

< Message edited by DesFIP -- 9/4/2013 1:33:26 PM >


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(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 1:46:38 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hellrider1
. Once I have sorted this matter I will leave this lifestyle.

.




Do not judge everyone or this lifestyle because of one idiot. There are wonderful men on this site who wouldn't do this type of thing.

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The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to Hellrider1)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 1:53:25 PM   
Dyfrynt


Posts: 202
Joined: 4/19/2011
Status: offline
All good advise so I won't add anything further. I do have a query though. You say in your profile you are strictly monogamous, yet you mention in your post that this moron has threatened to tell your partner, amongst others. Huh?

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 2:27:12 PM   
AaNiMaLl


Posts: 78
Joined: 4/4/2013
Status: offline
I don't know if I should tell people about this because I am also telling a whole lot of weirdos but I can't help my narcissistic pride so search Keystroke Logging on Google. With an email address and a bit of persistence it is relatively easy to access all information on someone's computer. ...OP musn't choose doms very well because this guy is pretty stupid. In New Zealand the common sentence for this would be 18 months in prison for the threats. If he took action then it goes up. ...Unless OP is into some real kink that is worth it.



< Message edited by AaNiMaLl -- 9/4/2013 2:29:27 PM >

(in reply to Dyfrynt)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 2:30:06 PM   
Ladytisha


Posts: 112
Joined: 6/3/2013
Status: offline
Might of got caught in a lie. I'm not saying what's happening to him is right but there's two sides to every story

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 4:50:22 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ladytisha

Might of got caught in a lie. I'm not saying what's happening to him is right but there's two sides to every story



Of course there are two sides to every story. Catching someone in a lie is one thing... threatening to expose them to their family and potentially ending their career is quite another.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Ladytisha)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 7:40:41 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
I would come clean to your husband/boyfriend first and yeah...leave the lifestyle if you can't be honest with him. Instead nurture your relationship.

Is all of this online until he said to meet him? If so I'm going to bet he's nothing but hot air but if you're really that scared then show up at his house with a big, brawny guy or a police officer. I'm sure that will convince him. You could also threaten him back with the same letters incriminating him and photos if there are any. It's a two way street.


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(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Blackmail - 9/4/2013 7:51:38 PM   
njlauren


Posts: 1577
Joined: 10/1/2011
Status: offline
If he is threatening like that, to expose you, it is attempted blackmail and you can get put in jail for a number of years for doing it. If you think this guy is serious, I would go to the authorities with the emails and texts, and personally would go to an attorney first to make sure he saw the evidence, so if the cops decide to pull their lazy ass bullshit, knowing that an attorney is aware of the evidence they will be forced to act. Unless there was anything between you that could say this was part of the game, they have him dead to rights, and it would be a lot more than harassment, that IMO is out and out blackmail (I am not a lawyer, but I am pretty certain of that one). The only consequence is I don't know if there is any kind of shield law with these kinds of things, it is why talking to a lawyer first may be wise, to make sure your interests are protected.

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Blackmail - 9/5/2013 5:37:41 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VideoAdminRho


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hellrider1

Admin, I am going on the message on my messages, clicking on threats box, but nothing happens when I press submit??


Okay, please just copy, paste and email them to me. I'll make sure Alpha gets them.




I thought Alpha was on vacation. I sent mail 2 weeks ago and it hasn't even been opened yet.

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This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to VideoAdminRho)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Blackmail - 9/5/2013 3:00:39 PM   
Hellrider1


Posts: 4
Joined: 1/11/2013
Status: offline
I was curious about this lifestyle and made a couple of friends on this site. Mainly talking about our love of motorbikes actually. During this the Dom kept asking for me to be his sub and I said no. We agreed to remain friends though. I then met a partner in vanilla life and told my friends on here. I also told my new partner I was curious about this lifestyle. So for all who pre judged me, I have not lied to anyone. The Dom seems to have taken this new information as a tool to further threaten me. He says he will tell my partner of my lifestyle, my family and send evidence to my employer also if I do not comply to his demands.

For those offering support and advice, thank you.

(in reply to thishereboi)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Blackmail - 9/5/2013 3:52:24 PM   
Winterapple


Posts: 1343
Joined: 8/19/2011
Status: offline
What evidence does he have? Does he have photos of you?
Nude photos? Sexts? Just messages you exchanged here?
What could he say to anyone other than you have a profile
here? Does he realistically know who your partner or family is?
Their names and addresses? How to contact them? Why would
they believe something a stranger tells them?

Did you ever meet this person offline? If not I suspect someone
or someones are yanking your chain and enjoying getting you
in a dither.

_____________________________

A thousand dreams within me softly burn.
Rimbaud




(in reply to Hellrider1)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Blackmail - 9/5/2013 10:30:01 PM   
HoldinOn


Posts: 20
Joined: 11/28/2012
Status: offline
Report to police.

Many years ago I made the mistake if downloading what seemed to be a sweet, romantic serenade from a guy I'd been talking to online. While I had been careful to not offer personal info, the download contained a worm?, (sorry, still not overly tech savvy), that face him access to my whole computer. I also used this computer for work purposes, so it had client info on it as well. Realizing I had not only put myself, but my student info, (I was a yoga teacher), I media rely sucked it up and went to the police. There was zero judgement from authorities, I never felt under attack. And as it turns out, the man was in Mexico, and was months away from completing a degree in computer programming. I was told at the time is actions had gotten him blacklisted from ever entering the United States or procuring a job with a US company.

Ultimate result, his attempt in blackmailing me didn't result in any defamation to me or those around me, but essentially rendered is education and future as useless. Please don't allow this person to steal you sense of power or security.

(in reply to angelikaJ)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Blackmail - 9/5/2013 10:31:55 PM   
HoldinOn


Posts: 20
Joined: 11/28/2012
Status: offline
Ohh, and be much more guarded with your personal information in the future!

(in reply to HoldinOn)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Blackmail - 9/5/2013 11:06:08 PM   
ivone57


Posts: 279
Joined: 1/23/2005
Status: offline
get a grip... go to the police with this information... inform your family of the situation ... unless of course you were cheating on your s/o..then you might have some explaining to do... but do go to the police for your own safety...

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ivone

Property of WhipHer

(in reply to angelikaJ)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Blackmail - 9/6/2013 12:02:27 AM   
MizzSpitfire


Posts: 70
Joined: 2/16/2012
Status: offline
If you already told your partner about your interest in the lifestyle, why are you so concerned about them being re-told? I also have a hard time with the fact that an intelligent adult person would have given out that much information about themself, to someone they hadn't actually met, on ANY website- vanilla OR kink.
It's starting to stink in here.

(in reply to ivone57)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Blackmail - 9/7/2013 12:37:37 AM   
justanotherguy00


Posts: 8
Joined: 8/30/2013
Status: offline
.

< Message edited by justanotherguy00 -- 9/7/2013 12:44:26 AM >

(in reply to Hellrider1)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Blackmail - 9/8/2013 10:34:16 AM   
Dyfrynt


Posts: 202
Joined: 4/19/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hellrider1

I was curious about this lifestyle and made a couple of friends on this site. Mainly talking about our love of motorbikes actually. During this the Dom kept asking for me to be his sub and I said no. We agreed to remain friends though. I then met a partner in vanilla life and told my friends on here. I also told my new partner I was curious about this lifestyle. So for all who pre judged me, I have not lied to anyone. The Dom seems to have taken this new information as a tool to further threaten me. He says he will tell my partner of my lifestyle, my family and send evidence to my employer also if I do not comply to his demands.

For those offering support and advice, thank you.


Let's cut to the chase. A lot of these assholes get off on scarring people, and they really get off when they can keep someone dangling longer and longer.

Consider the following:

What physical evidence does he hold over you. Emails, photos, phone calls, what? In other words, how damaging is his information.
Secondly you say your current partner already knows of your interest, so he is bullet proof. Is there any serious threat to you if the blackmailer were to tell your family?
Again, can he offer up anything more than telling a story? Does he have physical proof to use against you, or just a verbal tale to tell.
Ditto for your employer. Are you in a profession where something like this could seriously harm your career? Or is purely an embarrassment factor.

If he has no evidence to use against you, it is he said, you said. If he has evidence but the most it will do to your life is cause some embarrassment, call his bluff.

Tell him there is no way you will ever acede to his demands so go ahead and do his worst. Chances are that when he realizes he no longer has you hooked like a fish, he will go bother someone else. It's no longer a turn on when you stand up to him.

The important thing here is you need to stop playing his game. As long as you do he will continue to harass you. Once you make it clear you will not be a victim his hold over you is finished.

Unless there are further mitigating circumstances you have not mentioned, this is the best way to handle the moron.

(in reply to Hellrider1)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Blackmail - 9/8/2013 10:45:59 AM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline
And apply some common sense: If you are concerned about being outed then take down all your photos here that may be identifiable.
Your face shots for certain but your bike ones as well if people identify that bike with you.

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(as deemed by He who owns me)

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(in reply to Dyfrynt)
Profile   Post #: 40
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