Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Age Gap?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Age Gap? Page: [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:39:34 PM   
genuineandkinky


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/8/2013
Status: offline 		Is a 12 year age difference socially acceptable?.. I feel it's not socially acceptable, even though in my mind it is.

I know, people say I shouldn't care. However, what are your thoughts?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:41:05 PM   
imin2bdsm


Posts: 23
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline 		Is your partner 10?

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:41:32 PM   
genuineandkinky


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/8/2013
Status: offline 		34... I'm 22.

(in reply to imin2bdsm)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:43:28 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: genuineandkinky

34... I'm 22.

Wait, what? 34m, 22f? That's within the range of normal, going back thousands of years. Why in the world is this bothering you? Something is going on that you aren't saying.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:46:09 PM   
genuineandkinky


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/8/2013
Status: offline 		He's 34, I'm 22.

My friends might think it is weird.

My father might have something to say about it.

I'd think I'd get some looks. I do not care, but also, I hate that it's not 'accepted' by society.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:47:11 PM   
genuineandkinky


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/8/2013
Status: offline 		I've heard anything over 10 is not 'acceptable'.

I didn't think 12 years was considered 'normal'.

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:50:33 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: genuineandkinky

He's 34, I'm 22.

My friends might think it is weird.

My father might have something to say about it.

I'd think I'd get some looks. I do not care, but also, I hate that it's not 'accepted' by society.

It's totally accepted by society. Within a particular social set, your age difference is on the low end. What do you think is the age gap between Alex Baldwin and his wife, or Michael Douglas and his wife?

Does your guy look old? Does he treat you shitty in public? Do you have a college education and he doesn't? Do you act ashamed of him when the two of you are in public together?

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:54:55 PM   
genuineandkinky


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/8/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1


quote:

ORIGINAL: genuineandkinky

He's 34, I'm 22.

My friends might think it is weird.

My father might have something to say about it.

I'd think I'd get some looks. I do not care, but also, I hate that it's not 'accepted' by society.

It's totally accepted by society. Within a particular social set, your age difference is on the low end. What do you think is the age gap between Alex Baldwin and his wife, or Michael Douglas and his wife?

Does your guy look old? Does he treat you shitty in public? Do you have a college education and he doesn't? Do you act ashamed of him when the two of you are in public together?


He has a graduate degree and I'll have mine in May. I also plan on getting more and he supports me with that. Yes, my friends' ages are all on the low end, and most of them haven't been out of little Idaho or met any men except the ones at my college. I'm not interested in those type of men; I don't find them to be 'men' at all.

He looks his age, perhaps 2 years younger. He treats me very well. I don't mind it at all. I just find it weird how mostly (not all) of my friends think it's weird to date someone 30+. My dad is pretty closed-minded about certain things and then lightens up and supports me eventually.

< Message edited by genuineandkinky -- 10/16/2013 8:55:33 PM >

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:56:21 PM   
SeekingTrinity


Posts: 1834
Joined: 5/29/2012
From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
Status: offline 		~FRing it~

Honestly...why the hell should it matter to you what others find acceptable/not acceptable as far as your life goes? It's YOUR life. As long as you are happy with him, fuck what your friends think. You both are grown adults.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 8:58:55 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		Then my advice is to introduce him proudly to your social circle. If they see you're happy and glowing, they will approve. And if they don't approve, too bad for them.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:10:40 PM   
genuineandkinky


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/8/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

Then my advice is to introduce him proudly to your social circle. If they see you're happy and glowing, they will approve. And if they don't approve, too bad for them.



Yeah, I mean my friends have opinions, but in the end they support me. Maybe I'm thinking too much. I'd just hate to be 'that couple' that everyone looks at thinking " wow, what a big age difference."

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:14:17 PM   
genuineandkinky


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/8/2013
Status: offline 		Are you sure 12 years older isn't that big of a deal ?

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:17:45 PM   
SerWhiteTiger


Posts: 437
Joined: 8/12/2013
From: Why is my name Florida? That's a state!
Status: offline 		Do you have your ages tattooed on your foreheads? You cold be 29 and 26 for all random people looking at you can tell.

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:18:12 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		It's always something. He's too old, or too young. He's a different race, or religion. He's too handsome for you, or too ugly. He earns way more that you, or way less.

Get used to doing what you want, as long as it's ethical. The hell with the naysayers.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:19:24 PM   
genuineandkinky


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/8/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

It's always something. He's too old, or too young. He's a different race, or religion. He's too handsome for you, or too ugly. He earns way more that you, or way less.

Get used to doing what you want, as long as it's ethical. The hell with the naysayers.

You know what? That was a great way to put it. Thank you.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:19:30 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		12 year difference between adults seems irrelevant to me.... And I don't find most people will care about the difference.

I think the only time you might see it perk an eye or two is when one is old enough to be the parent of another....... 20 plus year kind of thing.... But even then I don't know that it raises that much of an out cry in general.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:19:38 PM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline 		My ex (man) is 12 years younger than I am (female). The only weird things about it were his crappy taste in music and his penchant for video games, which I have never played. But I find generally that I enjoy people close to my own age the most. More common ground.

_____________________________

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to genuineandkinky)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:21:57 PM   
genuineandkinky


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/8/2013
Status: offline 		Okay, well I'm starting to feel a bit better....thank you. I think some of my friends need to grow up, too. Step out of their black box.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:22:48 PM   
zerogirl


Posts: 28
Joined: 9/15/2013
Status: offline 		I consider anything under 15 years to be within the "radar". Like I wouldn't really think twice about 12 years older, assuming everyone is of legal age of course. And with you at 22 I think it's more than acceptable.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Age Gap? - 10/16/2013 9:23:03 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		I find others opinions of what I do means nothing. If I'm happy and legal, I'm good. You're 22.... You're grown. Don't worry about what people think. Of course, at your age now, you won't discover that opinions on your life and how you live it, don't matter. But coming from someone who is.....30ish...I'm telling you, live your life. Be happy. If the man you love is 20 years older, who cares?

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Age Gap? Page: [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.107