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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 1:27:14 PM   
mnottertail


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Status: offline 		Oh, I dont know, not so much, but when I am grilling I do start getting a little hankering for ketchup on the hamburger and mustard on the brats.....other than that....

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 1:29:27 PM   
RedMagic1


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75
I told a 50 yr old man that he was the most gorgeous man I ever seen

The way you phrased it is a comparison to other men. Why not, instead, phrase it in a way that you phrased it later in your post? "You're so good looking, I'm barely able to breathe." So the only actors in your sentence are you and him.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 2:54:42 PM   
littlewonder


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Status: offline 		I dunno. Almost every guy I know loves compliments just as much as the next human being.



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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 2:57:05 PM   
FieryOpal


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

Do they and what type of compliments do men like to hear?


Most people respond favorably to a truly sincere, personalized compliment with no strings attached.
This means they can see you yourself aren't fishing for a return compliment and you have no ulterior motive.
Perhaps the best-received (which could be back-handed) compliment would come from an adversary or competitor.

One of my pet peeves about other women is how so many of them dish out insincere compliments. Being told two days in a row that I look as though I lost weight is going to get on my nerves. (If I needed to lose weight, this would make me feel more self-conscious, and if I don't, then why bring up weight in the first place? How could you even tell a person's weight fluctuations within a 2-day period?) I'm aware that this is how some women are accustomed to bonding, and so I tolerate this meaningless exchange rather than cop an attitude.
Another way women compliment one another is to ask for the recipe, and it may be asked with sincere intent, but this always stumps me because I don't do recipes. I tend to eyeball measure and a dish isn't going to come out tasting exactly the same every single time. Plus I like to improvise.

In private, I don't say things I don't genuinely mean. I had one lover who actually wanted to be compared to other men. He was so insecure, it was almost a pathological need. If I hesitated for a fraction of a second before responding, he would assume the worse. ("Oh, your last boyfriend must have had a bigger cock then me", "ate pussy better than I do", or the infamous "made you come more times.") Needless to say, it drove me batty, and if he hadn't been so good in bed, I would have gotten rid of him sooner.

Usually complimenting a guy's package and a physical-mental-character attribute he takes pride in will go over positively, I've found. Again, sincerity matters.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 2:59:26 PM   
littlewonder


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quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

If someone gives me a compliment, my first reaction is "what the fuck are they after?".
Nobody gives a compliment for nothing - there's always an ulterior motive.

Meh!


I give Master and other men compliments all the time. I have no ulterior motive. It's just something that stood out to me during that time and thought it would be nice for them to hear it.

A couple of weeks ago, my boss came into the office and I really liked his suit. I told him he looked snazzy. I wasn't doing it to get ahead or butter him up. I don't have to. I'm already in good graces with him. I just wanted to let him know I liked his suit.

Master had on a nice sweater the other day that I don't remember seeing on him before. I told him he looked really nice. No ulterior motive. I just liked the sweater. <shrug>


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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 3:23:14 PM   
needlesandpins


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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder


quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

If someone gives me a compliment, my first reaction is "what the fuck are they after?".
Nobody gives a compliment for nothing - there's always an ulterior motive.

Meh!


I give Master and other men compliments all the time. I have no ulterior motive. It's just something that stood out to me during that time and thought it would be nice for them to hear it.

A couple of weeks ago, my boss came into the office and I really liked his suit. I told him he looked snazzy. I wasn't doing it to get ahead or butter him up. I don't have to. I'm already in good graces with him. I just wanted to let him know I liked his suit.

Master had on a nice sweater the other day that I don't remember seeing on him before. I told him he looked really nice. No ulterior motive. I just liked the sweater. <shrug>



I too compliment without motive. I will sometimes compliment the person directly, or I have been known to comment to Himself on someone else's appearance. I told Resident Sadist that I liked one of his profile pics because he looked very dapper in it. I've also complimented various ladies on here about their too.

the best compliments are the out-of-the-blue ones.

needles


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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 7:26:55 PM   
Apocalypso


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Status: offline 		I don't mind compliments on my physical appearance, but I'm unlikely to react to them much at all.

If you want to get into my good books, compliment my intelligence, my taste in music or my hat. Especially my hat. I spend a lot of time picking those.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 7:36:36 PM   
littlewonder


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Status: offline 		I'm surprised how many men have responded negatively about compliments. Those men I know in real life love love love compliments. They like that someone has noticed something about them that they have taken the time to keep up with.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 7:46:49 PM   
dcnovice


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quote:

GF: I'm leaving.

Smart girl.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 7:58:03 PM   
dcnovice


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Wow.

Folks (over?)think the compliments they get far more than I'd ever imagined.

This thread does offer a new reason to compliment a guy: Accepting it graciously is an encouraging sign of maturity. The opposite is a handy cue to move on.

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it's never enough to keep up.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:06:05 PM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I'm surprised how many men have responded negatively about compliments. Those men I know in real life love love love compliments. They like that someone has noticed something about them that they have taken the time to keep up with.

I did the same survey in my local forums, I had 50 responses from different men, and 90% said that their sexual interest in the woman will be lowered if she compliments him. They said it's in their biology to be the "chaser", so if they compliments him, although he appreciates it, but in their biology, they can't help it but just feel less interested, it's like the chase or work is done. I had less than 3 men who said they love compliments, don't stop giving.

Some mention it will feel awkward too.

So, my conclusion is, I will just hold my tongue in the future. Unless I can ascertain a specific guy really glows and grow with compliments.

< Message edited by Greta75 -- 1/23/2014 8:09:28 PM >

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:12:34 PM   
Greta75


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quote:


I give Master and other men compliments all the time. I have no ulterior motive. It's just something that stood out to me during that time and thought it would be nice for them to hear it.

Well your master has declared he really love compliments, I am trying to think of my x-dom, compliments was also wasted on him, I noticed he was uncomfortable and just went silent. Maybe alot of men are just not used to receiving as many compliments as women, because men don't compliment each other, whereas, women, ya know, you'll always compliment your girlfriend's shoes, dress, hairstyle, handbag, like we're always dishing out compliments to each other. And it never gets old.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:15:23 PM   
Dvr22999874


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Status: offline 		Many men, Brits and Aussies especially, are never taught how to accept a compliment gracefully and the grow up thinking it is kind of sissy or unmanly.
I have to say though that many women are the same (again, especially Brits and Aussies) and turn the compliment away with some kind of 'put-down', or they question the mans motives or taste.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:19:45 PM   
Greta75


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Status: offline 		I got to admit that while I can take compliments on my clothings and shoes and stuffs from females, but if my girlfriend ever told me I was beautiful, i would freak out and ignore it. Probably that's just being homophobic, but I love compliments from men! And would beam and show appreciation over it.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:21:00 PM   
littlewonder


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quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

FR

Wow.

Folks (over?)think the compliments they get far more than I'd ever imagined.

This thread does offer a new reason to compliment a guy: Accepting it graciously is an encouraging sign of maturity. The opposite is a handy cue to move on.


Couldn't agree more.


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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:26:47 PM   
Dvr22999874


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Status: offline 		We have a friend from Singapore who get's VERY embarassed when either of us compliment her............she always insists she is NOT attractive, not smart, not well dressed and not sexy, all of which she is. She has just not received any compliments previously, even from her husband.
As for males.............in this country, if a male is paid a compliment here, he usually shugffles his feet and gets horribly embarrassed and if it's a male that pays him a compliment, he either puts his back to the nearest wall or decks the compliment-giver *smile*

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:33:47 PM   
Greta75


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quote:


We have a friend from Singapore who get's VERY embarassed when either of us compliment her............she always insists she is NOT attractive, not smart, not well dressed and not sexy, all of which she is. She has just not received any compliments previously, even from her husband.

Well, that is true, is she Chinese Singaporean? We grow up in families where will never receive a single praise and they will only criticize. So getting a compliment is non-existent growing up, even if you did well in anything. I doubt her local husband does not compliment her though, but I reckon his compliments would be more on practical stuffs or her accomplishments rather than her appearances and personality and things like that. But yea, they don't mention physical stuffs. And the problem is, we ladies do like to hear physical stuffs, so we see it as no compliments. But the guys that replied were all mix nationalities. And the specific Ryu-lookalike I mentioned is an American dude from Boston.

I am not generous with compliments too. Ryu-lookalike was the only man I ever told he was gorgeous in my life. Just because I haven't really met anybody that breathtaking, well I did, a Chilean dude, but he was a business associate, so I felt it was unprofessional to tell him I thought he was gorgeous.




< Message edited by Greta75 -- 1/23/2014 8:35:33 PM >

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:37:21 PM   
FieryOpal


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

I had 50 responses from different men, and 90% said that their sexual interest in the woman will be lowered if she compliments him....
I had less than 3 men who said they love compliments, don't stop giving.

Some mention it will feel awkward too.


Did these 45 men crawl out from under a rock? I have never heard of a man losing his sexual interest in a woman for complimenting him, never, ever, ever.

The wide assortment of men I've known like having their egos boosted. Some see it as a sign of encouragement that the game is afoot....
Other guys don't mind if it's flattery either; in fact, I don't understand how some (vanilla) men can be so easily manipulated at times by flattery, particularly coming from a flirtatious female.

You may not have included submissive men in your sample, or intended to include them, but in general they welcome praise. (I don't associate with the humiliation-oriented ones.) The majority of s-types want to hear that a job was well done, duly noticed and appreciated.

The men whom Dvr22999874 refers to as not knowing how to accept a compliment gracefully, which isn't limited to those of European ancestry, are the ones who are usually stingy in giving out compliments. I would steer clear of any man like that.

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Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:46:00 PM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75
I told a 50 yr old man that he was the most gorgeous man I ever seen

The way you phrased it is a comparison to other men. Why not, instead, phrase it in a way that you phrased it later in your post? "You're so good looking, I'm barely able to breathe." So the only actors in your sentence are you and him.


Okay, maybe I went too far, but now come to think about it, my exact words was, "You're gorgeous!" And then when his all skeptical and stuffs, I think I made it lame and worst, saying that I just love men with dark hair. Anyway, I've dug a big hole lol. But he was so detailed in complimenting me!!! I should have just shut up!
After we had sex, I told him his body was gorgeous, because during sex, he seem to think he needs to lose more weight, while I thought he was perfect, genuinely. Anyway, I think he just didn't see himself as I see him and he thought i was patronizing him.

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RE: Do men like compliments? - 1/23/2014 8:53:32 PM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal
The men whom Dvr22999874 refers to as not knowing how to accept a compliment gracefully, which isn't limited to those of European ancestry, are the ones who are usually stingy in giving out compliments. I would steer clear of any man like that.

Not my experience. My x-dom was Brit and he wasn't stingy in giving compliments at all, infact, he really makes me feel good about my body and make me feel extremely beautiful. But he was silent and uncomfortable when I tried to give him some genuine compliments about his own body. Things like, I genuinely love his dick, it's absolutely beautiful and perfectly shaped, and he had beautiful big round eyes that I can't stop looking into. And his forearms are just so attractive to me, big and broad. And the other dude who I thought was gorgeous, he was so romantic in his compliments, he explored every part of my body and really affirmed that I'm beautiful from head to toe and complimented every part of my body as he goes along.
So generous with compliments but just uncomfortable at receiving somehow.



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