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RE: Gaining - 2/24/2014 5:11:29 PM

seekingreality

Posts: 599
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SyrMorgana

By which I mean weight gaining, being force fed etc. Is anyone into this as a fetish/kink? Guys particularly?

I don't get this one. I live a healthy lifestyle, and believe in exercise and good nutrition as a lifestyle. What you're suggesting strikes me as injurious.

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RE: Gaining - 2/24/2014 5:55:35 PM

LadyConstanze

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quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

What I find confusing is what happens when the said subject is "fat enough" or dies of the condition??
Do they get thrown out to the kerb and you go in search of another hapless victim?
This is the sort of thing I would categorize more as a crime than a fetish - it's dangerous.

A very nice woman I met about 3 years ago was a victim of that, she literally lives 2 roads down, first time I met her, she was struggling to get back from what I call the "medical ghetto" as all the GPs have moved into one building, which is a 10 minute walk away from here, if you're taking your time and do some window shopping. I was just having a blood test done and walked past her, then bought something, and walked back again, took maybe 30 minutes as I was trying on stuff, she was a few yards further, huffing and puffing and I thought she'd fall over, so naturally I asked if I could help her, turns out she lives around the corner, we made it back together and it took us the better part of an hour. Got her in and helped her to lay down, went to get her a cup of tea and we started talking. She was always a big girl and thought she had found her soulmate, who turned out to be a feeder. He stroked her ego with "more for me to love" and basically treated her like the geese are treated for foie gras. A few years down the line and she was admitted to the ER, she had reached a state where she could barely leave her bed, lived in the lounge downstairs as she couldn't manage the stairs. The doctors told her she needs to lose weight, her organs were shutting down, her back, knees, ankle joints were worn out, serious arthritis, incredible pain, in short, she had to lose weight or would be dead within a year.

The guy she was married to couldn't cope with it and left, she has lost a lot of weight right now, and 3 years down the line she is still alive, but she now needs a wheelchair or a disability scooter to get around, she'll never be able to walk properly, and she's 34 - really not old, but her joints and her back are about 4 times her biological age.

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RE: Gaining - 2/24/2014 6:19:22 PM

ChristianDomCA

Posts: 44
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SyrMorgana

By which I mean weight gaining, being force fed etc. Is anyone into this as a fetish/kink? Guys particularly?

I've never heard of this before, but as long as it is consensual, who is to judge whether it's right or wrong?

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Post #: 23

RE: Gaining - 2/24/2014 6:58:28 PM

shiftyw

Posts: 2837
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FR- I haven't read anything.

I am chubby.
My ex, whom I loved dearly (He has passed away)- was a chubby chaser. He was also a Dom/Top. He always wanted to be a feeder- but he really struggled with wanting to because of the health implications- so he never really pursued it.
He would always say "some things are better left in my head"

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RE: Gaining - 2/24/2014 7:29:53 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SyrMorgana

By which I mean weight gaining, being force fed etc. Is anyone into this as a fetish/kink? Guys particularly?

Damn...I saw this when the net was just beginning...."feeders"....freaked me out not only because....there were men actually interested in this but....chics (also) that loved this and then....photo montages that showed (sequentially) that chics WERE into this...getting bigger by the day.

Why a guy would find this fascinating (or women who would find this appropriate) is light years beyond me however....being a guy I can state without equivocation.....guys are in to weird shit.

(This ain't my shit).

< Message edited by LookieNoNookie -- 2/24/2014 7:30:06 PM >

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RE: Gaining - 2/24/2014 7:59:55 PM

FrostedFlake

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From: Centralia, Washington
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ChristianDomCA

quote:

ORIGINAL: SyrMorgana

By which I mean weight gaining, being force fed etc. Is anyone into this as a fetish/kink? Guys particularly?

I've never heard of this before, but as long as it is consensual, who is to judge whether it's right or wrong?

Seems to me a fella wandered through here a few months back. Was thinking about having all his teeth out, to better suck Dick. Or maybe it was George. Anyway, he asked folks generally what they thought about that.

Now, I'm asking you.

You see? I don't have to tell you this shit. I can point at it, right inside your head.

Christian, huh? Color me not impressed.

< Message edited by FrostedFlake -- 2/24/2014 8:00:23 PM >

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RE: Gaining - 2/24/2014 8:54:18 PM

littlewonder

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It's actually semi common. To each their own. If you can find someone who wants to do it and wants to die an early death, more power to ya both. Good luck.

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RE: Gaining - 2/24/2014 11:36:42 PM

sexyred1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ChristianDomCA

quote:

ORIGINAL: SyrMorgana

By which I mean weight gaining, being force fed etc. Is anyone into this as a fetish/kink? Guys particularly?

I've never heard of this before, but as long as it is consensual, who is to judge whether it's right or wrong?

Who is to judge?

Normal, thinking, feeling and responsible feeling people, unlike yourself if you posted this after reading the replies. Sheesh.

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 12:08:46 AM

MissImmortalPain

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"Feeders" really are not at all uncommon, they are just not often called kinky. I have known more than a few and even lived with one. I believe that for many men they see it is as an obsessive form of affection. They know that food comforts and many think that if they feed a woman it will make her happy. There are a few that also see it as something sexual because women are so often trying to control (and by control I mean be skinny) their weight. They view it as a woman telling the world that she can not be told what to do. That she doesn't care if she fits into the model idea of what society would like to think women look like. There are a small amount that view it as sexual do to the idea of playing with food as well.
I personally have known more than one submissive man that has tried to find a feeder for himself. In my experience though the submissive men that have looked for one did it in the hopes that She or He(the feeder) could force him (the sub) into gaining weight because they are slight of build and wish to be bigger.
On a different level altogeter I enjoy a kind of feeder....the kind that can cook and likes handfeeding another. It is not something I do often but I do have one boy that would peal grapes and feed them to me if I told him to...and I have to admit I enjoy it a great deal.

< Message edited by MissImmortalPain -- 2/25/2014 12:11:26 AM >

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 12:17:32 AM

SoulAlloy

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Having lost a lot of weight recently through illness I've been trying to put some back on, never occurred to me there was a kinky way to do this as well...

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 12:53:21 AM

CandiDanielz

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There is a lot of it about if you type feeders/gainers into any Web search.
even similar sites like collarme specifically for that.

I can't imagine how anyone would want to get that large.
Some of the women are really big and so proud of it.

It's not healthy to have all that extra weight.
and i'm sure it costs the nhs a fair amount due to diabetes and heart problems etc.

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 1:31:04 AM

MissImmortalPain

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Actually, Soul, I forgot to say that there are also a few kinky little boys out there that get into this do to the mommy factor. Having a "mommy" tell them when, where, how, and what they must eat. There are many women that get a lot of joy out of being that sort of mommy aswell. I had a boy that was sick for awhile that ended up dropping a lot of weight. While he recovered he took great joy in me feeding him and telling him that I was proud of him for being a "good boy" and finishing his meals. What started out as a game to get him to gain the lost weight ended up being something he really likes doing. I don't do it often enough to make him gain enough that it would lead to him being overweight. I do think though that done correctly it can be like suckling, very bonding, when done during the right kind of play.

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 3:04:11 AM

FrostedFlake

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I do keep forgetting I am on the wrong planet.

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 5:10:35 AM

theshytype

Posts: 1600
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ChristianDomCA

quote:

ORIGINAL: SyrMorgana

By which I mean weight gaining, being force fed etc. Is anyone into this as a fetish/kink? Guys particularly?

I've never heard of this before, but as long as it is consensual, who is to judge whether it's right or wrong?

I wouldn't say it's so much judging another's "kink".

When I hear force-fed, the first image that pops into my mind is the gluttony scene in the movie Seven. The victim is strapped down and forced to eat until death. That, in my mind, is force-fed.

I believe most people here are extremely tolerant of what floats other boats, but safety and well-being of the victim, I mean sub or bottom, is always a concern.

If a whip-wielding D hears of another D using a whip without having knowledge of what they're doing, they'd get a similar response.

Sometimes, a little extra weight is healthy for a person. But, there is a line and once that's crossed, the person could be paying for the rest of their life. Take the example LadyC provided.

If the feeder was taking proper safety precautions, such as ensuring the persons nutritional values are met, they're not going overboard, and regular physicals are done, I see nothing wrong with it.
Once they cross the line, putting the eater's health and life at risk, then I kind of have a problem with it. Especially if it will require medical expenses that contribute to my health care costs going up.
If both parties are fully aware of possible consequences and still go for it, but paying for all medical costs themselves when they become death on legs, then go for it. I'm a supporter of consensual assisted suicide.

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 6:00:14 AM

LadyConstanze

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quote:

ORIGINAL: theshytype

If the feeder was taking proper safety precautions, such as ensuring the persons nutritional values are met, they're not going overboard, and regular physicals are done, I see nothing wrong with it.
Once they cross the line, putting the eater's health and life at risk, then I kind of have a problem with it. Especially if it will require medical expenses that contribute to my health care costs going up.
If both parties are fully aware of possible consequences and still go for it, but paying for all medical costs themselves when they become death on legs, then go for it. I'm a supporter of consensual assisted suicide.

It still is highly likely that the outcome is an eating disorder, I mean nobody would encourage a submissive to become addicted to booze or drugs, even if it was consensual, everybody would freak out. While I am also a supporter of assisted suicide, I think this would be a case where you turn somebody into an alcoholic and then do assisted suicide by handing him a bottle of anti-freeze or methanol...

Think about it in reverse, if somebody would encourage starvation and the submissive would die from lack of food? I think everybody would go "How wrong is that!"

Don't get me wrong, anybody being attracted to a certain body type, no issue with it, we all like what we like and there is a lot of mileage between Skeletor and Jabba the Hutt, but risking another person's life and health to satisfy your own fetish is when I think the line to abuse is a bit too close for comfort.

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 6:33:13 AM

theshytype

Posts: 1600
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Hey, leave Jabba out of this!

I agree with you but, if the one consenting to be fed wants the same, I can't say it's wrong.

The way I view it, it's no different than most other risky activities.
If I were to take on race car driving, fully knowing the risks and took safety precautions, is it wrong? I enjoy traveling at high speeds, others enjoy watching me, and I'm doing it on a race track instead of the main highways with the general population. I'm risking my life and possible injury for something I enjoy. Some might say I'm crazy for doing it. I just don't see much of a difference.

ETA: My view is based on the assumption that both parties want the same and are both knowledgable and responsible when it comes to the possible outcomes. I realize, however, the chances of that in this case may be slim and, at that point, agree with you 100%.

< Message edited by theshytype -- 2/25/2014 6:41:52 AM >

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 6:44:31 AM

LadyConstanze

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I'm cool with people risking their own lives because they get something out from it, I gave up motorbikes because I know myself and I kinda like being alive but I totally get the speed rush.

I have a lot of friends who are a bit bigger for various reasons (surgeries and all that), but one thing that seems to be typical (and the girls always complain about it) is that they get approached by guys who don't like them for themselves but they want them even bigger. A lot of them have problems being confident simply because they feel they need to conform with how they "ought" to look, so the guys use their often low self-esteem to give them the feeling they are truly wanted and cherished, if they only put on a bit more and then more...

As I said, if you would take a girl suffering from anorexia and tell her if she would only lose a few pounds more, she'd be super good looking, you'd also kill her and most people would find that abusive, so the other extreme isn't really all that different.

I do like a lot of edge play, so yes, risks, but if I had a fetish for amputees, I would try and find one, not try to convince a submissive to have an arm or leg amputated so I can have my fetish.

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RE: Gaining - 2/25/2014 6:49:45 PM

littlewonder

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The way I look at it, I don't want anyone butting into what Master and I do so I give people their rights to do whatever they want to do. Their life is not my concern. If someone wants to weight a ton and die, so be it. It's their life. If someone wanted to jump off a bridge, I'll tell you more power to you. If it makes you feel at peace, I'm not gonna stop you or even tell you it's wrong. It's your choice. That's what life is....a choice.

Stay out of mine and I stay out of yours.

So what if it's unhealthy? Is it my life? Nope. They're adults. Let them figure out their own lives.

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RE: Gaining - 12/27/2014 5:12:25 PM

bi3inchpig

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I am a brand new to it--never tried anything yet--but yes, I find it very hot and would love to experience it.

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RE: Gaining - 12/27/2014 10:24:16 PM

BecomingV

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

quote:

ORIGINAL: SyrMorgana

@LadyConstanze and Kalikshama, my apologies that you have seen such awful representations of this issue. Yes indeed, there is a darker side to it, as there is any fetish but my understanding is that when done consensually and considerately it can be as enjoyable as any other aspect of kink. :)

In my case, I like the idea of feeding someone, although granted not excessively so but am also simply an admirer of larger people. Generally people who are larger naturally.

Ok, I will be quite blunt, OP. The kink you describe as being consensual, considerate and enjoyable is sugar costing an actual practice called feeder-ism, which is one of the most heinous, selfish, desperately controlling and dangerous practices ever.

As a big girl myself, I of course am attracted to men who are attracted to me and my body type. However......I would not be attracted to someone who viewed my fat as a fetish delivery system, instead of a woman. It's like when someone calls me beautiful, I get that. If someone said you are a beautiful fat woman, that's stupid because now you have qualified my beauty by my size. Understand?

No woman, fat or thin, wants a kink to be about size. I would say the same if you were into not feeding someone consensually. It's dangerous and fucked up to help someone gain weight who is already heavy.

You need to look inside and discover what type of person looks out from the mirror, who would partake of such an emotionally and physically damaging practice. And if a woman wanted this, then she is not simply into accepting herself, she is actually suffering from severe self esteem issues.

If you admire larger people, date one, but tank this kink. God, if any guy asked me to gain weight, I would slap him.

I completely agree with your whole post except for that last bit I put in bold. You made important points in a clear and comprehensive manner and kept it friendly, too. Kudos!

This is the BDSM community and around here, we value consent. Hitting men because we feel angry at their words is no more acceptable than hitting women for the same reason. It's important to keep in mind that what distinguishes our violent acts from the violence of abusers... IS consent. It needed to be said.

Otherwise, great post and I hope that someone is a little bit more safe now because you wrote it. Hats off, sexyred1. :)

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