ThePrincessKali
Posts: 424
Joined: 9/19/2012 Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: pg4g quote:
ORIGINAL: ThePrincessKali I hope you didn't feel I was insulting you as I wasn't. And I do applaud you as it seems you've gotten out of a tough situation. I can't pretend I've been there. I grew up Catholic but when I got into high school was given a choice by my parents to continue my religious education and I decided not to as it went against what I believed in. I made that comment because I tried to reason with him, not about his decision to spread the word, but solely on the fact that I didn't appreciate being told I was going to hell. And he continued to quote the bible and refused to answer any questions I asked and just repeated the same thing. To me, that isn't a logical dialogue. So if he is not willing to even discuss the fact that I didn't need "saving," it seems illogical. At least from where I'm standing. He also told me that his family was not religious and I don't believe he had a Christian upbringing so he chose this lifestyle. I did try hard to see his perspective, because honestly I was angry bc of the way he treated me and was trying to understand. I couldn't understand how someome would willingly join a group and then stay in it, when it made him feel angry and bad about himself. But as I said I've never been in the situation so I'm sure it's much more difficult than I think it would be. Firstly, no, definitely not insulted. Just pointing out why you'll never convince some of these people - it's not their logic that's messed up, it's the beliefs behind them. And you can't convince a person to believe something different any more than he can convince you what he believes is correct. Belief is an internal thing. Secondly, I never had a Christian upbringing either. I started believing in Christ in my teenage years. Thirdly, I'm sure he wasn't interested in a dialogue. The things you said would have contradicted his core bad assumptions, and they just trumped everything. He wouldn't listen to other stuff. It probably hurt and would cause him to become even more confused, troubled, and he would have clung to what he held as a security blanket: his religious beliefs. It provides him a sense of security and certainty. Fourthly, I'm sure you were angry. People can really offend and insult, and it sounds like he did that pretty harshly as a defense. Your difficulty is understandable. Finally, I had somewhat more difficulty. The bible doesn't speak directly about BDSM, and as I mentioned earlier, D/s is alluded to, and slavery is even condoned. But homosexuality? That's simply outlawed as evil. Dredges of hell, even in the New Testament. It took a heck of a lot of work for me to work at sorting out my head. I believed, unlike this guy, that I had solid religious reasons for believing I was an evil bastard haha. Down to scripture and verse. I can imagine the pain the guy's head is in, and as RedMagic1 said, literally blood, sweat and tears working myself out. I spent weeks cooped up torturing myself, and then watching the blood and sweat pour off myself as I sat crying in the bottom of a shower night after night for what a disgusting person I was in my own eyes. In a similar way, I'm sure this guy hates himself. I see the damage the church can do in people's lives, and even though I'm still a Christian, and I do believe in God, I certainly do feel for people like this, and for the people who have to deal with the backlash of their self hatred. [Edited to fix typo] I'm so sorry that you had to go through that ordeal : ( I have an acquaintance who went to Liberty College (I think that's what it's called) and is gay but has decided to become celibate because of what the bible says. Every time I've talked to him I want to cry bc I feel so bad for him. I am straight but have many gay friends and that part of the bible really bothers more than anything. My father was born again and told me my best friend a bad person because he is gay. We had a long talk about that and he eventually came around and stopped thinking that after he met my friend and found out how many good things he did for me. The guy the OP is about also expressed feelings of distaste during his attempt to "save me" because I live in an area that's very well know for having a high gay population. He was struggling with sexual desires he was born with so it floored me that he felt he had the right to judge others for their natural sexual desires.
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