allyC
Posts: 778
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: Las Vegas
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: jezabelKH ...in Your "discussion" or and seemed to have inaccurate information or a biased opinion on BDSM. so i sought out truthful, unbiased and educational answer, and as always like to hear both sides of the coin. this was not done is malice towards You or Goreans, You just happen to have posted the most recent topic related to BDSM vs Gor. W/we personally enjoy BOTH lifestyles. Hi jezabel. In Master Malkinius' original post, he said, quote:
"I have seen in a fair number of posts in various places over the years about Masters who will not let their slaves call anyone else Master or serve anyone but themselves in any way, including something as simple as fetching food or drink. I have seen that also as being something more common in BDSM Masters than in Gorean Masters. Only the owner being called Master seems to be the norm there, or the norm among many. I have verified this with people who have been involved in the BDSM lifestyle for a decade and more as being true. Note...not true in all cases on either side." I fail to see where this is inaccurate where BDSM is concerned. The answers given in this thread actually support what he said about what is generally practiced amongst those who participate in the BDSM lifestyle. What he said in the above paragraph (in a nutshell) is this: I've seen Goreans who don't allow their slaves to call other Gorean free people Master or even serve them a drink. In BDSM it seems to be more common that a slave or sub only refers to his/her dominant as Master/Mistress. I have verified this but in both examples I've mentioned, it isn't always the case. Right, wrong, or indifferent, the examples and opinion that he gave afterward were with regards to why people who call themselves Gorean would refuse to follow Gorean tradition. What does that have to do with this forum? Why are you asking non-Goreans "why don't you follow Gorean tradition?" Wouldn't the answer be obvious? I've been a part of the Gorean community for over 8 years. Throughout that time, I've never been a Gorean or a Gorean slave. It has been very clear to me, however, since day one that if you are a slave within the Gorean community and/or if you are owned by a Gorean man, then you call all Gorean free men Master and all Gorean free women Mistress. It is just how it is done. It is how it has been done in every Gorean community, home, enclave, web group, offline gathering, and/or family that I've ever seen/experienced. When I spend time with Goreans, that is how I behave. I follow the "when in Rome" caveat. It is a well established tradition and if you were to poll 100 Gorean people, I would imagine that at least 99 of them would agree. I will further add that amongst our close-knit circle of lifestyle friends, even those who are not Gorean still refer to my owner as Master Cavalier or Master Wayne. I refer to the dominants in our lifestyle family as Master So-and-so and Mistress so-and-so, Gorean or otherwise. It's just how we do things within that group because each dominant man and woman has earned a place in the family and their lifestyle "position" is recognized wtih an honorific. I will have to agree that it seems that you were offended by Master Malkinius' original post because it "touched a nerve" somehow. Perhaps you felt that he was attacking you personally because you do call yourself Gorean yet you don't refer to other Gorean free as Master and Mistress. You didn't hear what you wanted to hear so you took his entire post elsewhere (which I might add pulled it entirely out of the context in which it was intended) to get the answers that you did want to hear so that your own personal stance could be validated. I have been a non-Gorean slave interacting with Goreans for a long time. In that time I have never observed it to be acceptable for a Gorean slave to address a free person in any other way except with the proper honorific. It isn't there because the free person has earned some great position of respect. The reason for such address is that a slave is a slave (as Master Malkinius stated above.) and by referring to the free as Master or Mistress, she is (in a sense) saying and reinforcing within herself, "I am a slave and you are a free person." If a slave doesn't want to follow that protocol, then she doesn't need to hang out there. After all, it isn't about her. A lot of people believe that if a slave calls every free man Master that it will somehow demean the man's position, role, or place in the relationship. I think that if it does that, then the man doesn't have a very firm grip on his mastery in the first place. A title (or lack thereof) does not make a person but a slave using that title does reinforce that she is indeed, only a slave and that the free person she addresses, is not. No matter how you slice it, jezabel, that's the way Goreans interact. It is their tradition. While there may be many different individual traditions beneath the BDSM umbrella practiced by various sects, groups, and families, BDSM itself as a whole does not have any such tradition. I will add that in a mixed forum, that protocol is usually much looser as you are dealing with a myriad of preferences, traditions, sects, beliefs, etc. But in a strictly Gorean forum (on or offline), I've always learned that if I have chosen to enter that place from the vantage point of my knees, then I will be required to follow the protocol that Gorean slaves must follow or I will be corrected - and I'm okay with that. Well wishes, Cav's ally
< Message edited by allyC -- 7/13/2006 3:15:22 PM >
|
RE: BDSM Masters and Mistresses someone needs truthfull... - 
Profile
New Messages
No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages
Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages
Locked w/o New Messages
Post New Thread