FieryOpal
Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013 From: Maryland Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: RumpusParable Tribute is by the two primary definitions: 1) an act, statement, or gift that is intended to show gratitude, respect, or admiration. 2) payment made periodically by one state or ruler to another, especially as a sign of dependence. Both usages are in place in the BDSM world (and vanilla, really). It can be something done or given to show how much one values or feels for the dominant (and it's put in that term rather than just "a present" due to there it most often being mixed in with the view of one as a form of ruler or owner or such). Such things can fall inside or outside a findom interaction or relationship. It can be payment to a pro-dom or someone else who is providing services (many "findoms" are actually camgirls getting paid for their persona as findoms... which technically, thinking on it, makes them fall back into the pro-dom category). Good explanation, Rumpus, and by its very nature, often a regularly scheduled offering extracted by one conquering nation over its conquered territories, tribute is customarily not an option. I might add that it wasn't uncommon for neighboring countries to willingly offer tribute in many forms to a more powerful one in order to maintain an uneasy peace and to ward off conquest, thereby ensuring continued autonomy. I can see why this parlance would enter into Domme/subs relations. Tribute doesn't necessary have to take monetary form, but that would be the most expedient form of currency. (I don't require this, but my cousin & I are probably exceptions to the rule.) Currency is a medium of exchange. There must be quid pro quo in any "contractually" entered arrangement, verbally or otherwise. This arrangement can take the form of relationship, partnership, or "contractor/subcontractor" dynamic. Domination is a valued commodity of sorts. Submission is valued by the Dominant, but in terms of supply and demand, Dominance (including much sought-after Topping skills) vastly outweighs the submission which is available. In many cases, in order for a (mostly) male submissive to attract the attention of a Domme, much less get collared & owned by a Mistress, he needs to show serious intent and distinguish himself from the herd. What most whiny (not just newbie) male submissives balk at doing is parting with their money. Therefore, it is a kind of Domination (like that of a more powerful, potentially conquering nation) to require monetary tribute. What many of these submissives don't get is that tribute can be offered in other, more socially acceptable forms, and perhaps be of greater value to the Domme in bartered form. Bartered form could be special services, skills, talents and abilities, acts of vanilla chivalry, making oneself of use and appreciating (raising) one's own self-worth in the eyes of the Dominant through creative means. There are options. Like someone once said, everything is negotiable. You subfevered males jonesing to get your domination fix aren't going to get something - much less a scarce commodity - for nothing. You wouldn't get into a vanilla woman's pants ordinarily without making an effort at sustained dating practices. We're still women, whether Dominant or S/switch or submissive, and men are still required to prove themselves worthy of our time, favor and affection.
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Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau
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