FieryOpal
Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013 From: Maryland Status: offline
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I could be completely mistaken and coming out of left field. Originally in the BDSM leather tradition, a submissive was to bring the Dominant a small gift as an entrée or token of interest. If the Dominant (those achieving the rank of Master were predominantly gay/non-hetero males) accepted this gift, then the submissive was a viable candidate for consideration as a slave, or else for an NSA play session until earning the right to be collared and trained as a slave. Submissives generally greatly outnumber Dominants or those available to serve as a Top. Dommes especially can pick and choose the cream of the crop. It's still a matter of supply and demand. If you are a male sub, You Play, You Pay. With an experienced Pro-Domme, she can still afford which paying clients she wants to try out or keep. There's a market out there for Financial Domination, and with Cyber-Domming, you take your chances. Some subs want to remain in the fantasy zone and will never leave it (or else flake out from moving into RT-Real Time). To them, a Dominant woman (or facsimile thereof) is not much more than a kink & fetish delivery system for them. There are Fin-Dommes who are also lifestyle Dommes and will require tribute on a regular basis. If a Domme seeks a primary partner, oftentimes they encounter the mentality that the male sub is not worthy. Therefore, it isn't uncommon for the last thing to be on such a sub's mind is the concept of dating a Domme as if she were a *real* woman and not a FemDom porn caricature fantasy figure. There are much fewer fully lifestyle Dommes. Some are bisexual. Some are poly and are open to collaring multiple subs. An FLR-lifestyle Domme ordinarily seeks a fully integrated, committed, intimate D/s relationship dynamic (which may or may not include BDSM bedroom activities). The ones I know, myself included, are marriage-minded. You can't afford our price. Your money's no good here, because we only accept relationship currency. No different than out in the vanilla world, where you not only have to be a suitably compatible match, but you have to be husband material.
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Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau
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