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RE: What am I? - 10/5/2016 5:47:44 PM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline 		Greatlilbabygirl

I have been here since the beginning of time and no one wants me even as friend because they ae all fake fuker like you of no reality

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: What am I? - 10/5/2016 6:01:48 PM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline 		The only person who has a name and number on here is me

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Profile   Post #: 82
RE: What am I? - 10/5/2016 7:11:50 PM   
Awareness


Posts: 3918
Joined: 9/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl
I need your seasoned, sage opinions and advice.
You really did come to the wrong place.


_____________________________

Ever notice how fucking annoying most signatures are? - Yes, I do appreciate the irony.

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Profile   Post #: 83
RE: What am I? - 10/5/2016 7:27:40 PM   
Greatlilbabygirl


Posts: 786
Joined: 9/9/2016
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness


quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl
I need your seasoned, sage opinions and advice.
You really did come to the wrong place.


Lol. I don't think that's entirely true. I got some good feedback.

(in reply to Awareness)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: What am I? - 10/5/2016 9:18:26 PM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Alecta
You need to understand that being content to let the other person take the lead when you think they're making good choices is NOT submissive. It is simply allowing the standing situation.

Actually, the whole point of choosing the right dominant is choosing someone whom you can trust to always make the right decisions for both of you. And then yes, you can perpertually allow that person to make all the decisions for life. It is possible to find someone like that!

I experienced this in my marriage. Although my x-husband is not a dominant. But I realise I also chose him because, I trust him to make decisions on my behalf. And I always agree with all his decisions. He does not need to consult me to make any decisions on my behalf or any life altering decisions. I trust him to always make the decision I would have made myself all the time and he never disappoints on that arena. He is not even a dominant and I can have that. So it's just about finding a dominant you can trust. I mean seriously if ya gotta keep correcting him all the time, he is just not the right dominant for you in my opinion. I don't wanna baby sit my dominant. And if I had to question his decisions. Unlikely I will feel submissive to him anyway, as I can't even respect his decision making skills.

I was thinking about your example about the dog. For example, I don't like dogs. I like cats. I wouldn't hook up with someone who wants to keep a dog. No conflict. I grew up with a household filled with dogs who reproduces as my mom breeds her dogs for sale. I get fresh patch of puppies all the time. So I spent enough time in my life surrounded by dogs to know I don't like them! They smell and they are annoying. And their "faithfulness" is not free will. That's what I hate the most. They are like real life non consensual slaves, pack animals who have no choice but to follow pack leader. I love cats because it's their free will if they choose to be loyal to you. Totally their free will.

I think no matter what, it's still like finding a vanilla mate. You got to share the same interests, same values, and be moving towards the same direction.

Submission doesn't have to be about constantly being forced into things you do not like unless that is your main kink. Then go ahead.

Just choose the right mate who enjoys all the same things as you. It's like finding a vanilla mate. It's the same thing!

I mean there are literally dominants who do not enjoy their submissive anymore, JUST because she is enjoying everything he is ordering her to do too much. Like there wasn't anything he asked her to do that made her uncomfortable or falter her. And they get upset and felt it doesn't feel submissive since she's enjoying everything too much. This is when the sub spectrum of BDSM is so much broader than her dominant. He couldn't think of anything to make her squirm at all!

I mean, the BIG question is what's wrong with some of these type of dominant that they can only enjoy submission IF their sub was doing things that they find unpleasant to do?


< Message edited by Greta75 -- 10/5/2016 9:22:11 PM >

(in reply to Alecta)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: What am I? - 10/6/2016 6:00:42 AM   
Greatlilbabygirl


Posts: 786
Joined: 9/9/2016
Status: offline 		Those are Sadists


(in reply to Greta75)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: What am I? - 10/6/2016 6:56:09 AM   
Alecta


Posts: 1355
Joined: 1/19/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75
I experienced this in my marriage. Although my x-husband is not a dominant. But I realise I also chose him because, I trust him to make decisions on my behalf. And I always agree with all his decisions. He does not need to consult me to make any decisions on my behalf or any life altering decisions. I trust him to always make the decision I would have made myself all the time and he never disappoints on that arena. He is not even a dominant and I can have that.


YES, that's why that is NOT indicative of a D/s dynamic. It is not submissive to allow a situation you have no problems with to continue. That's just because it's a situation you are happy with. Being dominant (adjective) is taking steps to make a situation more to your preference and being submissive (adjective) is accepting the situation when you are not happy with it.

quote:

Submission doesn't have to be about constantly being forced into things you do not like


That is true, but I suspect while my emphasis is on "constantly", yours is on "forced into things you don't like". Being a submissive or slave, realistically and non-sexually, is mostly about things you're ok with, sometimes things you are happy with, and the occasional thing you accept because your Master wants it even if you don't.

Submission describes when you give in. This means that if you don't give in, and you're perfectly allowed to not give in, it is not submission and you are not submitting. But since a Submissive is defined as a person who submits, if you are not submitting, you are therefore not a Submissive.

quote:

I mean, the BIG question is what's wrong with some of these type of dominant that they can only enjoy submission IF their sub was doing things that they find unpleasant to do?


You're confusing Dominant with Sadist. I'm both, so I think I speak with some authority when I say it's not the same thing and it comes from different places.

(in reply to Greta75)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: What am I? - 10/6/2016 9:14:15 AM   
tamaka


Posts: 5079
Status: offline 		My parents have a very D/s totally vanilla 53 year marriage. My mom will tell dad what she thinks about something when she cares enough to not just let him run with it without adding her 2 cents in. However, after she's done sharing her views I've often heard her say, "Do what you want, you're going to anyways". That is submission. And they have a wonderful relationship which both of them value more than anything.

(in reply to Alecta)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: What am I? - 10/7/2016 9:31:14 AM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
Whether or not others say 'you are or are not XYZ' forget labels and find someone who makes you happy. There is no one true way; realize you can and should be who you want to be, even if that doesn't fit what others think you should call yourself or how you should act.

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: What am I? - 10/7/2016 9:36:04 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Seriously, I can't wait until that fucking BDSM personality test goes away.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: What am I? - 10/7/2016 9:40:25 AM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Seriously, I can't wait until that fucking BDSM personality test goes away.

I must have skipped that day in BDSM & D/s school!

< Message edited by catize -- 10/7/2016 9:45:59 AM >

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: What am I? - 10/7/2016 9:44:05 AM   
LilJuly76


Posts: 1245
Joined: 1/9/2016
Status: offline 		it's online, seen it, personally I think it's crap

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: What am I? - 10/7/2016 9:47:23 AM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		Its been around a long time...it is skewed


_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to LilJuly76)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: What am I? - 10/7/2016 9:51:27 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Choosing a partner based on that test is like choosing an employee on the Myers & Briggs test - it's one dimensional.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: What am I? - 10/7/2016 10:00:53 AM   
LilJuly76


Posts: 1245
Joined: 1/9/2016
Status: offline 		ah yup

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: What am I? - 10/9/2016 1:43:00 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WickedsDesire

Greatlilbabygirl

I have been here since the beginning of time and no one wants me even as friend because they ae all fake fuker like you of no reality


Just going to skip that 'common denominator' theory, huh?

quote:

ORIGINAL: WickedsDesire
The only person who has a name and number on here is me

Which means what, exactly?

I don't speak for every woman here, but I'm confident in saying that a good portion of women don't see the desperation of such information plastered on a message board to be all that enticing.

Best of luck to you.





_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: What am I? - 10/9/2016 7:04:49 AM   
Greatlilbabygirl


Posts: 786
Joined: 9/9/2016
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Choosing a partner based on that test is like choosing an employee on the Myers & Briggs test - it's one dimensional.

I definitely don't use it for that. I used it for personal insight. I have a lot of training in Likert scale development, so I take all such surveys with a healthy dose of skepticism and am well aware of the inherent limitations of such.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: What am I? - 10/9/2016 7:25:21 AM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		Just because a dominant person says you aren't submissive doesn't make it so, no matter what their level of experience is.

You might be submissive with the right partner.
You might be a bedroom-only submissive.
You might be a bottom.


You are new; while a label can sometimes be useful, you are no less real if you don't know what you are yet.
You are you.
Don't stress about a label.



_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: What am I? - 10/9/2016 8:16:53 AM   
Greatlilbabygirl


Posts: 786
Joined: 9/9/2016
Status: offline 		Thanks :)
Slowly getting back out there. 🐱

(in reply to angelikaJ)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: What am I? - 10/9/2016 8:37:58 AM   
WhoreMods


Posts: 10691
Joined: 5/6/2016
Status: offline 		Nobody's asked: "animal vegetable or mineral" yet?
Slipping, people...

_____________________________

On the level and looking for a square deal.

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 100
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