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RE: fake slaves - 8/3/2006 11:46:36 AM

MasterRoissey

Posts: 40
Joined: 3/15/2006
Status: offline

I gotta say its been a funny week. I used to believe that most of the "frauds" on line tended to be on the dom side of the fence...but in the past few says I have recieved the most bizarre proposals from 3 "slaves"...they were
A) 13 year old girls who stumbled onto this site and were "having fun"
B) some seriously disturbed individuals
C) truly novices, out to be badly injured or killed.
D) all of the above.

My apologies for the negative thoughts to My fellow dom side ...

< Message edited by MasterRoissey -- 8/3/2006 11:48:13 AM >

_____________________________

"I have no hard limits...and yours are only temporary." Master Roissey

(in reply to PhDslave)

Post #: 21

RE: fake slaves - 8/3/2006 12:51:17 PM

raiken

Posts: 868
Joined: 10/18/2005
Status: offline

LOL, sorry i have to laugh, for i have met all kinds on here, and the other day, i met someone on here for the FOURTH time...meaning the fourth cm profile, and i recognized him as the same Dominant each time. Yet, even though i alerted him to this, and to stop emailing my profile and playing games, he continues to do so. i don't complain though, for he is not vulgar but rather funny. i have also met Doms/Masters, Dommes/Mistresses, subs/slaves who have at least 2 or more different profiles on here. i guess the reasons vary, but why more than just one, is always something i have wondered about. Every so often, i get lucky, and meet someone who is NOT a liar, wannabe, or player, and so because of those good peeps, i have come to like this site.

One Master i am friends with, usually asks for a pic with the most recent copy of the local newpaper on it, for locality proof, or, a pic of the sub holding a sign up with his name written on it as proof of who they say they are, and then, he has other ways of either proving they are real or tripping them up in their own lies. He often gets those from other countries looking for money to come live here, etc., and he did get burned once, when he was a novice to online, so now he is very careful and moves very slowly.

~rai

(in reply to MasterRoissey)

Post #: 22

RE: fake slaves - 8/3/2006 4:01:21 PM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistresSplash

We had discussed in chat that we would have on going meetings over the next few months. To meet in person, several times. She wanted me to take ownership right away. I had said over the next few months of meeting on trial basis. We "both" would decide. Don't understand the bashing of me. Granted you may have been here longer and have had more experience in all this. This is why I am here asking other mistress's. Came to recieve more input on subject and how to deal with. If this is what I should expect, then I will no longer seek advice.

You don't have to be here 24 hours to understand contradiction. Several things you've said don't compute. Sorry to have to call you on it, but we get our chains pulled here quite often, by doms and subs alike. To be fair to the subject, consistency is a trait you'll definitely need to work on to manage a live-in slave.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to MistresSplash)

Post #: 23

RE: fake slaves - 8/3/2006 4:03:31 PM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: PhDslave

i'm in email communication with a Mistress i 'met' here on CM. We're only at the email stage. We'll probably spend beaucoup time emailing, IMing, phoning, traveling, etc before any decision is made. Seeking a Mistress who also wants and can help sustain an LTR is usually a long process. Have a LOT of patience, but don't get discouraged.

Excellent advice, PhD. I can see speaking on the phone after a few email exchanges, or heck, even flying/traveling to meet someone within the month to save from wasting time (and to prove the interest is really there.) But....it must be mutually agreed upon. If one direction is pushing and the other isn't budging, something's wrong.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to PhDslave)

Post #: 24

RE: fake slaves - 8/3/2006 4:42:38 PM

joshslave111

Posts: 19
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline

I think it's the same for Fake Dommes.

There are many phonies on here and on other sites. I've chatted with a Domme on more than one occasion, found Her to be interesting and i got my hopes up thinking that she was the real deal. I remember thinking "finnaly, after years of searchng!!!!". Then when it came time to meet they either confessed that it was just something they were toying around with online, or they didnt show up for the meeting and were never heard from again.

It's very common, it's happend to me 3 times after moving to NY, each time i had my hopes up and then they either came clean or dissappeared.

Perhaps someone should start a site where you get verification that it's either a Domme or a sub. They're required to spank or be spanked to prove it:)

(in reply to PhDslave)

Post #: 25

RE: fake slaves - 8/3/2006 4:52:37 PM

MistresSplash

Posts: 15
Joined: 7/3/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistresSplash

We had discussed in chat that we would have on going meetings over the next few months. To meet in person, several times. She wanted me to take ownership right away. I had said over the next few months of meeting on trial basis. We "both" would decide. Don't understand the bashing of me. Granted you may have been here longer and have had more experience in all this. This is why I am here asking other mistress's. Came to recieve more input on subject and how to deal with. If this is what I should expect, then I will no longer seek advice.

You don't have to be here 24 hours to understand contradiction. Several things you've said don't compute. Sorry to have to call you on it, but we get our chains pulled here quite often, by doms and subs alike. To be fair to the subject, consistency is a trait you'll definitely need to work on to manage a live-in slave.

What didnt compute? That we both talked about it. Made arrangements? Decided to draw it out over a couple of months? What part is confusing to you so I can explain it where you can understand?

She wouldnt give me no other means to communicate with her other then her email and im. She hadnt replied to either one after we had communicated for two days.

I then seen her back on site with picture on the third day. Knowing it takes 72 hours to be approved.

The thread of topic is fake slaves. How to go about getting proof they are real what to look for.
1.The dont have cam?
2. Will not give phone number?
3. Does not return emails?
4.Doesnt reply back to left messages?
5. Gave number to be reached they dont call you?

I call it like I see it.
Fake!

< Message edited by MistresSplash -- 8/3/2006 4:59:25 PM >

(in reply to MisPandora)

Post #: 26

RE: fake slaves - 8/3/2006 10:23:41 PM

MistressMynx

Posts: 7
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline

In My experience if a sub/slave is keen they will stay in contact with You in other ways than email or IM/PM. they will seek You out and do what ever they can to stay in touch. Keep in mind some are so intimidated by a Dominant that they hide under the covers thinking that when they are worthy they will come back out again. Suddenly when the play and One that they crave is available to them, reality is hard to deal with.
Some promise and seemingly dedicate their lowly lives.....only to get distracted by other 'things'.
Fake is not uncommon in this cyber world We correspond in, it is not wrong of You to ask for anything, how they respond to that should be Your indicator as to their keeness and so how 'real' You are in Your demands. Think through what it is You seek and view simple task giving as an indicator as to a potential sub/slaves ability to serve You. Tact , patience and cooperation.
I wish You well in Your journey, take care
MM

(in reply to MistresSplash)

Post #: 27

RE: fake slaves - 8/3/2006 11:24:41 PM

Wickad

Posts: 428
Joined: 3/12/2005
Status: offline

I'm a big fan of meeting people very early on. By 'early on' I mean within a week of meeting then online. By this point I usually haven't gotten attached or decide to fit them into any particular category. Once you meet someone face-to-face it is a bit easier to make the judgement of if they will suit your needs or not.

Pretty simple. If they do suit then you simply keep meeting them for coffee and talking face to face. Get to know them as a person and find out what their life is about. This will let you know pretty quickly if they are a fake or not.

Wickad

PS - aka... get off the internet!

(in reply to MistressMynx)

Post #: 28

RE: fake slaves - 8/4/2006 5:20:39 AM

MistresSplash

Posts: 15
Joined: 7/3/2005
Status: offline

Thank You MM yes she had seeked me out. I can only think she got scared. Or is just living the life of wanting to live this life. Yes I do need to have more patience.

Thank You Wickad I am like you. When meeting I can pretty much determin if yes or no. But do need more patience. Thank You Both.

_____________________________

Call It Like I See It!

(in reply to Wickad)

Post #: 29

RE: fake slaves - 8/4/2006 6:15:05 AM

cloudboy

Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

I don't consider anyone I talk to online to be a slave

I think on a broader level, no one can self declare a particular status or title. Such a thing must either be demonstrated or earned. Online, one can have a certain degree of faith in another's pronouncements --- but I think that's a far as you can take it.

For instance, as far as I really know, you could be anyone --- using fake pictures, assuming an ID, etc. To take my impression of you from faith to reality --- the next steps would be talking on the phone and meeting. And I agree with you, these would only be the first steps to establishing anything concrete between us.

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 30

RE: fake slaves - 8/4/2006 7:20:44 AM

nephandi

Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline

MistresSplash to get back to the original question, no it is not wrong to ask for a phone number or to see a picture or to see them on web cam. It might come on as a bit to strong the first 48 houers after meeting, but if you are taking it that fast, no it is not wrong.

But dont be to suprised, many of the profiles here are fake, made by pepole that want to play, or what what jerk of material, i am sorry your relationship did not work out and sad to say it will probably be that was many times before you find somone that is real and that fit you. Good luck.

(in reply to cloudboy)

Post #: 31

RE: fake slaves - 8/4/2006 7:25:33 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

I don't consider anyone I talk to online to be a slave

I think on a broader level, no one can self declare a particular status or title. Such a thing must either be demonstrated or earned. Online, one can have a certain degree of faith in another's pronouncements --- but I think that's a far as you can take it.

For instance, as far as I really know, you could be anyone --- using fake pictures, assuming an ID, etc. To take my impression of you from faith to reality --- the next steps would be talking on the phone and meeting. And I agree with you, these would only be the first steps to establishing anything concrete between us.

I just want to add that I feel the exact same way about about claims of status on the other side of the equation.

I could say that I am a master of history -- I have the degree to prove that and by summer 2007 I could even use the title doctor of history -- but unless I'm actually in a relationship with someone whose mistress I have become, I would not use that title for myself or describe myself that way.

Others do and that's fine it just isn't how I view them myself.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to cloudboy)

Post #: 32

RE: fake slaves - 8/4/2006 8:29:50 AM

vicki2725

Posts: 19
Joined: 2/13/2006
Status: offline

there are several mistress who are not what they say they are. Anyone who's looking to jump into the relationship within a week after chatting a few times online is crazy. I know my first relationship took a very long time to establish. It takes trust and honesty on both sides. These are just my thoughts and feelings

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 33

RE: fake slaves - 8/4/2006 8:53:04 AM

alovelylady4U

Posts: 67
Joined: 1/15/2005
From: leeli
Status: offline

i must confess. i am real true and hope to be placed by the end of the year. But i am very careful. Phone #? i had a man show up at me door using the reverse phonebook. In a small town atomosphere where bi women into a different lifestyle? It was very frightening to say the least when He mention that my kiln could reach temps to cremate bodies- i kid Y/you not. Webcams? i simply say no to 99% of the Men. No repsect at all- instead "now dear stand up and strip for me." but i do return emails. Even if it is to say "sorry Sir i just do not think W/we are a good match." i do use a cell on occasion yet i am in an area near an airport so i lose the connection often. But the cell is safer and it is nice to hear the voice of the Man i am getting to know.
In the beginning i was made to feel i must no matter what or i was not a s/sl at al- just a wanna be. So when a not so local D showed up to meet and greet? He decided to get so drunk. Oh- He brought the 1/2 empty bottle with Him- this should have been a good clue W/we were not going out to dinner and to close the door. yet i was new & worried He would get a ticket and with His profession- He could have been fired. So i poured Him into my bed and reached for a pillow and blanket ready to sleep on the divan. He came awake enough and the next 7+ hours were a nightmare! Rape, abuse, choked so hard He fractured my throat.
i have come a long way i feel since those first days walking thru fire. i realize i am a bit overly cautious and some say a player or wanna be. It no lomger matters. i know in my heart what i am and what i desire and i can wait. i have met recently 3 differnt Master's and They know that i am healing from surgery and will not be ready until 1/07 probably. W/we are a distance apart and meeting in person may be tough at first- but W/we chat, learn more about one another and by the end of the year i so hope to kneel and finally submit.
True some are "fake" and only desire cyber. Some what to have me write long detailed stories for Them ( when W/we did meet He was pretty well ED, He could only live through stories i suppose.) i have had my share of this and so much more. But there are so many different levels of BDSM, so many different wants and needs that there is a place for E/everyone here. (except rapists and killers and...) Some due to life at home- can only be weekend play dates, some only cyber, others seem to be ok with long distance or a D/M that visits at best once a week. It is not my cup of tea of course but it is for S/someone out there. A good rule of thumb is be open and honest about who Y/you are and what Y/you seek. True a lot of fraud and also a lot of different goals, needs, desires. As a group maybe W/we can find a fail safe way to uncover the bad ones and get the word out. This topic is as old as the lifestyle i am sure- there must be a solution. Some that are into law enforcement, Psych, Reserarch? possibly Y/you can combine forces and come up with a way to detect and protect.

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 34

RE: fake slaves - 8/4/2006 12:34:52 PM

FelinePersuasion

Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

It's not school, no. But proper punctuation and grammar does make posts more easily read. And as someone who is claiming Dominancy, I'd expect more effort than being shown to speak well and present oneself well.

People will and do judge based on how one presents themself.

quote:

thought MistresSplash

Sorry teach if my typing is improper to you, didnt know this was school.

(in reply to MistresSplash)

Post #: 35

RE: fake slaves - 8/4/2006 5:05:39 PM

cloudboy

Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

I just want to add that I feel the exact same way about about claims of status on the other side of the equation.

I could say that I am a master of history -- I have the degree to prove that and by summer 2007 I could even use the title doctor of history -- but unless I'm actually in a relationship with someone whose mistress I have become, I would not use that title for myself or describe myself that way.

Others do and that's fine it just isn't how I view them myself.

So like if you and I had a relationship, we'd just be buds? I'll take IT!!

At this point, though, we will have to settle for "possibly-could-be-great-buds" if not for all the frickin distance between us.

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 36

RE: fake slaves - 8/5/2006 7:24:34 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

I just want to add that I feel the exact same way about about claims of status on the other side of the equation.

I could say that I am a master of history -- I have the degree to prove that and by summer 2007 I could even use the title doctor of history -- but unless I'm actually in a relationship with someone whose mistress I have become, I would not use that title for myself or describe myself that way.

Others do and that's fine it just isn't how I view them myself.

So like if you and I had a relationship, we'd just be buds? I'll take IT!!

At this point, though, we will have to settle for "possibly-could-be-great-buds" if not for all the frickin distance between us.

Exactly and you even get how I feel about the terms "friend" and "buddy" and so-forth. I'm very cautious about how I describe my relationships. I can bond so quickly with someone that I really have to be cautious to protect myself let alone my family.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to cloudboy)

Post #: 37

RE: fake slaves - 8/5/2006 7:37:09 AM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

"life is like a box of chocolates..."

Patience, wisdom, learning, and time are the things that determine the grade of chocolate.

IMHO, just because someone does not have a webcam (I did not until 2 weeks ago), gives out their phone number immediately (I do not), hardly makes them a fake----remember what doesn't fit you does not mean it doesn't fit someone else---I would slow down--read, learn, and discern--and understand the difference between Dominant and Domineering.

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

(in reply to MistresSplash)

Post #: 38

RE: fake slaves - 8/5/2006 7:38:56 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistresSplash

We had discussed in chat that we would have on going meetings over the next few months. To meet in person, several times. She wanted me to take ownership right away. I had said over the next few months of meeting on trial basis. We "both" would decide. Don't understand the bashing of me. Granted you may have been here longer and have had more experience in all this. This is why I am here asking other mistress's. Came to recieve more input on subject and how to deal with. If this is what I should expect, then I will no longer seek advice.

I don't think anyone is intentionally bashing you. Understand that dominant women are usually very outspoken and not shy in speaking their mind.

I agree with tammyjo and MissTress, as I usually do. I expect nothing from the net as far as a partner. I am hear to learn. Reading the things these amazing women, and many other people, write have taught me so much. If I happen to gain a relationship from it, awsome, if not, no biggie. I don't do online relationship and don't consider anyone a potential for such until I spend time with them in person.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to MistresSplash)

Post #: 39

RE: fake slaves - 8/5/2006 8:22:50 AM

WhiteRadiance

Posts: 247
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

This is one of those topics that never goes away.

I talk to people A LONG TIME before ever meeting them. I want to know them well, and make sure they are mentally stable before revealing who I am. I want to be able to trust them, and want them to trust me, and this does not happen in a day.

Sorry folks, but we live in a dangerous world full of weirdos and freaks and I don't care if someone considers me a fake because I do not rush to meet them immediately. Yes, there are some who merely play and are wankers. But there are a lot of people out there who are sincere but apprehensive and you can freak those people out by being too pushy.

That is a red flag for me. I hate pushy subs and subs who insist upon meeting me right away. I make them wait. I make them do things at my pace, which is slow. I get to know them, their hobbies, their likes and dislikes, what they do, who they are as people, and let them get to know me, before I meet them.

But that's just me. I suppose I am weird.

_____________________________

Staci

The drop of rain makes a hole in a stone not by violence, but by often falling.

(in reply to MistresSplash)

Post #: 40

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