RE: Giving out your phone number

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RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 11:21:22 AM

amayos

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Giving out your phone number. Is it right or wrong. You hear that you should never give out your phone number. Then you hear if they wont give you a phone number then they are hiding something. I've been on the internet since the beginning and have never giving out my phone number. If you want to talk use a computer mike . They are cheap and you dont have to pay for the call.

Relatively early on in communication, I will require a phone number. I consider it putting your mug where your mouth is. The person can, of course, refuse to do so, just as I can (and will) refuse to continue the dialog.

In my opinion, IM and email exchange has a shelf life. Pixel text and quaint iconography will never be able to replace verbal communication.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 21

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 11:26:40 AM

Kahri

Posts: 70
Joined: 8/30/2006
Status: offline

I prefer to meet in person before giving a phone number. There's a place that I like to meet that's public so neither of us has to worry about safety, and has three separate parking lots - I always suggest they park in one that I never use. Then we meet and talk and if I feel comfortable with them, we can exchange phone numbers later.

Soemtimes I give my cell phone number before the meeting, just in case someone runs late or something. But I'd meet them without it.

(in reply to amayos)

Post #: 22

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 11:31:46 AM

rick19

Posts: 98
Status: offline

Nope. I was taking to somebody on here and they pressured me for a phone number almost instantly, so I blocked her. I don't give any kind of number away just like that, I have to at least know you are a real person, anybody can take someone elses pics and use them as their own.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 23

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 11:35:33 AM

amaidiamond

Posts: 1793
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Watford / London
Status: offline

I have an old cell phone with an unregistered sim card, That way I can chat to people and get to know them by phone, arrange meets and the like but still be "safe"

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 24

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 11:44:34 AM

CuriouslyKat

Posts: 118
Joined: 8/21/2006
From: Kansas
Status: offline

*fast reply*

I do the old "Giveme your number so I can call you!" and call them private. Every once in a while I will give out my number first or ask for an exchange but only after chatting for awhile.

Kat

Edited because proof reading is important!!

< Message edited by CuriouslyKat -- 9/12/2006 11:46:16 AM >

_____________________________

Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
Lost myself again and I feel unsafe

Sia "Breathe Me"

(in reply to amaidiamond)

Post #: 25

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 12:05:23 PM

CreativeDominant

Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Giving out your phone number. Is it right or wrong. You hear that you should never give out your phone number. Then you hear if they wont give you a phone number then they are hiding something. I've been on the internet since the beginning and have never giving out my phone number. If you want to talk use a computer mike . They are cheap and you dont have to pay for the call.

It depends on what I pick up from the person either through talking to them in the collarme chatroom or through email. I have exchanged emails with several people several times that I would not give my number to. There again, I would not ask for theirs either. When I ask for a number and they ask me to give them mine instead...I will usually do so because I would not have asked for their number if I didn't already feel comfortable in talking with them. I have not had a lot of contacts from "whackos" (hmmmmmmmmm....am I doing something wrong?) but if someone were to insist on my number and then, after a couple of "feeling each other out" calls still refused to give me theirs, I would end my dealings with them. Surely...if you feel that you can be trusted enough with my number and I have trusted and believed in you enough that I can give it to you without you doing harm to me, then you have to trust me also. You can give me all that you care to about how more men are stalkers and this and that and the other...it does not change the fact that women have been known to be stalkers (David Letterman's friend, anyone?) or to brew up trouble (as I regretfully found out when I found that someone I had been dealing with for awhile was married and had neglected to tell me...I found out when her husband called me threatening to name me as Co-Respondent, etc., etc.)...the fact is that if you feel you should be trusted with my number, then I should be trusted with yours.

Like amayos...I do not care to just exchange emails forever. I can understand the need for time for getting to know someone, I can understand the need for time before meeting due to distance and financial considerations, even security issues but at some point I want to hear a voice. Part of it is, I admit, a desire to hear the tone of their voice but part of it is to also see whether or not they converse in the same manner that they write or are they someone who conducts a wonderful series of correspondence but whose conversation is noticeable mainly for the plethora of "yeahs", "uh-huhs", "no ways", and long silences despite whatever conversational gambit I choose to try.

< Message edited by CreativeDominant -- 9/12/2006 12:18:33 PM >

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 26

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 12:30:59 PM

littlesarbonn

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline

Eventually, I hit the point where email isn't going to help me communicate any further. I'll usually give out one or both of my phone numbers at that time. If she decides to call me, the relationship grows further. If not, then it was never meant to be.

I'm not all that hung up on hiding my phone number. I have business cards I give out contantly as a writer that has my phone number on it. Hiding my phone number is not beneficial to me in any way. I'm not in the closet. I'm not in need of hiding anything from anybody. I'm in the phone book.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 27

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 1:49:07 PM

thisishis

Posts: 278
Joined: 5/11/2006
From: Southeastern MA
Status: offline

Life is full of risks ..... the key is in 'balance'.... and using common sense, ... and listening to your gut instincts... etc

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Giving out your phone number. Is it right or wrong.

It would depend on who you are, and what your intent and situation may be. For me, in my situation, i'm comfortable with giving out my numbers, both, home or cell.

quote:

You hear that you should never give out your phone number. Then you hear if they wont give you a phone number then they are hiding something.

True in some cases, for some people. Not so, for others. i exchanged home telephone numbers with my Master within hours of finding each other online back in 2004. It was a great method for each of us toward measuring whether the other was legit and serious regarding intentions & it worked out fine. Your mileage in a similar situation, and that of anyone else, may vary, of course. And had He have been any other man that i may have been exchanging numbers with and meeting, the results may have differed, of course. There have been times when Master has decided that we will be meeting someone from online, in person and we use the exchange of phone numbers followed by a brief conversation to verify intent, and sometimes that is followed by a quick cam session for the same reason. There had been one person that we met who got 'weird' on us that we decided to severe contact with. We blocked her from calling our number and are able to do so because we use an online phone service that provides the subscriber with a program through their computer which does allow for blocking.
And a phone call doesn't rule out that a person is hiding something, and neither does using a mic/voice chat program (and ... neither does meeting in the flesh).

quote:

I've been on the internet since the beginning and have never giving out my phone number. If you want to talk use a computer mike . They are cheap and you dont have to pay for the call.

i'm not a newbie to the internet. As a newbie i was much more guarded regarding my personal information. As time has gone by, i've become a bit less guarded, although personal circumstances have changed conciderabley and probably have influenced that fact.
i've done the messenger voice chat. It was ok, and not nearly the same as using a phone, and far too many on the net still have no clue of how to make the programs work or hook up a mic properly. Also, ISP connections are often suddenly severed with no warning and the voice chat features require 'taking turns' on the mics to talk.
i believe in the theory of, 'No risk, no gain'.... to some extent. i do understand that some are more comfortable with taking risks than others are. The greatest times in my life so far have been a result of accepting a few well thought out risks and acting on them.

< Message edited by thisishis -- 9/12/2006 1:56:25 PM >

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(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 28

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 2:02:46 PM

GambitLeBeau

Posts: 76
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Lancashire, UK
Status: offline

I have no real problem with giving my mobile phone number to someone after I've gotten to know them a bit. Using a (rather old) Mac, it's the easiest way to give proof that I'm speaking with a real person.

< Message edited by GambitLeBeau -- 9/12/2006 2:03:21 PM >

(in reply to thisishis)

Post #: 29

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 2:49:37 PM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

For me it entirely depends on the vibes I get from the person. There are a very few on here I would not hesitate to give my full name, phone numbers, address etc etc etc to if they asked. Our happy trio of Scooter, Jewel and 2x being the first that come to mind, I feel I know the kind of people they are thru their consistance and their affections for each other. Bita aka Celeste is another that just popped into my head. I know there are others but I am tired and spacy. There are several that I have met via CM that do not frequent the boards that I have talked to via phone quite a bit.

Then there are others that I wouldn't even dream of it.

_____________________________

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(in reply to GambitLeBeau)

Post #: 30

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 4:28:14 PM

FelinePersuasion

Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

If I'd talked to them for a little bit, saylike 20 mins or an hour and they seemed interesting I'd exchange phone numbers, but walk up say hi give me a number no.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

A little different question. why would a woman give out her number on the net to a perfect stranger. If she met that same person on the street and he asked her for it she would say no.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 31

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 4:44:15 PM

givemyall

Posts: 620
Joined: 12/3/2005
Status: offline

If I have been chatting to someone on Messenger and get a good feeling about them then I dont have a problem with giving out my home number or my mobile number. I've been happy doing that for a long time and up to now haven't come across a problem.....I keep my dogs that little bit hungry just incase

(in reply to FelinePersuasion)

Post #: 32

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 4:57:04 PM

DivaDuchess

Posts: 402
Joined: 8/17/2006
Status: offline

We don't have a land line at all. Just a cell phone. So it's never been an issue.

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Courage is not the absence of Fear,
But rather the judgement that,
Something else is more important than Fear.

The Brave may not live forever,
But the Cautious do not live at all.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 33

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 5:26:01 PM

kitty2MLoneWolf

Posts: 149
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar
A little different question. why would a woman give out her number on the net to a perfect stranger. If she met that same person on the street and he asked her for it she would say no.

That's not necessarily true. I've given my number out to people I've just met online for a variety of reasons, but mostly because it felt right to me. And so far, it's been fine.

I'll also say- I don't have a landline, all I have is my cell.

I tend to be the same way.. I think its kind of crazy for people to be as paranoid as they can sometimes become. Do I give my number to just anyone who asks?? NO.. but if I like someone enough to want to talk to them, I dont care if I have only talked to them 10 minutes online... I have no problem giving out my number..

_____________________________

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Dont worry about what other people think....they dont do it very often!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 34

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 5:28:07 PM

michaelGA2

Posts: 1533
Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline

would it help in one's search?

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Post #: 35

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 5:36:27 PM

ayasha

Posts: 149
Joined: 12/10/2005
Status: offline

one has given her cell phone number on occasion, but not till after one has talked to somebody for a long time, and they have become a friend regardless of what happens in future with them becoming this one's Master.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 36

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 5:43:48 PM

twicehappy

Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

For me it entirely depends on the vibes I get from the person. There are a very few on here I would not hesitate to give my full name, phone numbers, address etc etc etc to if they asked. Our happy trio of Scooter, Jewel and 2x being the first that come to mind, I feel I know the kind of people they are thru their consistance and their affections for each other.

Aw thank you, we would do the same. There are a few here that have the number mostly because they are friends like cheeky and erin, and a few i would offer it to, you being top of the list followed closely by BadPaliden and his girl and of course the pup Benji. For much the same reasons you have given, i feel i "know" and trust you.

Lol, i can think of a few i wish did not even know what state we lived in.

< Message edited by twicehappy -- 9/12/2006 5:44:31 PM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 37

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 5:55:07 PM

Ladyofthemanor

Posts: 51
Joined: 11/8/2004
Status: offline

easy answer get a Trac Phone the pre-paid type, you can change the number easily, and it is a pre-paid cell phone. this works GREAT for this purpose, that way you aren't giving out your home phone number, which can be reversed looked up on the whitepages dot com. and the person can get your address. Also, there are sites now that can find cell phones numbers if you know the provider. Remember this goes both ways, for Doms as well as subs.

< Message edited by Ladyofthemanor -- 9/12/2006 5:56:12 PM >

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slavelilly

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 38

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 6:09:58 PM

FelinePersuasion

Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

It worked for me just fine when I had dial up.

quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

Using a mike on the computer is not a possiblity for those of us on dial-up....it just doesn't work well.

(in reply to GeekyGirl)

Post #: 39

RE: Giving out your phone number - 9/12/2006 6:31:30 PM

zumala

Posts: 1121
Joined: 6/16/2005
Status: offline

*giggles* I should start a poll... Who would give benji their phone number? After all, he's just SO cute and disarming, right?

(in reply to FelinePersuasion)

Post #: 40

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