RE: Civility and Incivility in the Scene

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RE: Civility and Incivility in the Scene - 10/15/2006 5:03:27 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Dear julietsierra, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I've seen the policy of saying ill of another work to the negative, as there is he said/she said like interactions and personality conflicts. With black listing people without neutral parties present when the offending conversation was ongoing.

Another thing I've seen--is having people go to the extreme of falsely creating E-mails. Problem is, unless you subpeona the server and have them pull their records to compare with; most will assume that such is true. A lot of expense created if somebody is creatively evil.

Too much drama in groups these days, in my mind's eye. Some thrive on it--I don't need it in my life.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to julietsierra)

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RE: Civility and Incivility in the Scene - 10/15/2006 6:40:04 PM

julietsierra

Posts: 1841
Joined: 9/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHugs

Dear julietsierra, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I've seen the policy of saying ill of another work to the negative, as there is he said/she said like interactions and personality conflicts. With black listing people without neutral parties present when the offending conversation was ongoing.

Another thing I've seen--is having people go to the extreme of falsely creating E-mails. Problem is, unless you subpeona the server and have them pull their records to compare with; most will assume that such is true. A lot of expense created if somebody is creatively evil.

Too much drama in groups these days, in my mind's eye. Some thrive on it--I don't need it in my life.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

I agree with what I believe you are saying, which is why I believe it's unproductive to sit and complain about the degeneration of courtesy without a solid plan in mind that might help resolve that situation.

Yes, it's all drama and yes, I don't get involved in my life, but here's the thing, when someone is in a position of leadership (and that, can be loosely or solidly defined), it's up to them to make some decisions as to how they want the environment of their undertakings to be. Writing a long post about how we just all need to be oh-so kinder and gentler, not to mention polite, without addressing the other side of that coin - the times when people are NOT kinder, gentler, and politer, only confirms for those who believe it's their perogative to be rude that it's just fine and dandy. If we want kinder, gentler (or at least more polite) we have to set the standard and then hold to it.

I don't think that active expectations of politeness are too far out there to presume that no one can say anything about it. And while I respectfully value your opinion and mean no disrespect in return - and by no means do I suggest that you do this - sticking one's head in the sand, proclaiming that if we do hold people to a standard, then all sorts of bad and evil things will happen, and on TOP of that, maintaining that one doesn't like drama, simply invites the very drama they were hoping to avoid.

juliet

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RE: Civility and Incivility in the Scene - 10/15/2006 6:57:58 PM

LadyHugs

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Joined: 1/1/2004
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Dear julietsierra, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I agree that nothing happens in a productive manner, if people have their heads in the sand.

However, dialog and bringing light onto the issues, keeps it refreshed occassionally, which may inspire change.

Leadership should be the ones to are the examples for the community. Some do inspire and impact the community in wonderful and positive ways. Yet, some enter the leadership role with different agendas, not always benefiting the community in a larger sense.

Although we cannot control others, controlling ourselves first is a step in the direction; as long as it is positive. At times, there are no answers but, bringing attention to things--helps cause individuals to see it still has worth.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

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RE: Civility and Incivility in the Scene - 10/17/2006 6:57:06 AM

Amaros

Posts: 1363
Joined: 7/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHugs

Dear julietsierra, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I've seen the policy of saying ill of another work to the negative, as there is he said/she said like interactions and personality conflicts. With black listing people without neutral parties present when the offending conversation was ongoing.

Another thing I've seen--is having people go to the extreme of falsely creating E-mails. Problem is, unless you subpeona the server and have them pull their records to compare with; most will assume that such is true. A lot of expense created if somebody is creatively evil.

Too much drama in groups these days, in my mind's eye. Some thrive on it--I don't need it in my life.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

One should avoid taking sides in any domestic dispute - the likely outcome is that the disputants will unite in opposition to your meddling.

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RE: Civility and Incivility in the Scene - 10/17/2006 12:49:19 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Dear Amaros, Ladies and Gentlemen;

One need not be involved or take sides, as to be witness to things unfolding.

When two sides or more are in dispute, it never fails to spill over to those not involved and thus, witness such.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

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RE: Civility and Incivility in the Scene - 10/17/2006 2:10:24 PM

Contesaluv

Posts: 173
Joined: 3/11/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

Random usage of capitals is something I find highly offensive!

I have to say I that when I first started on here I saw that and thought to myself, well what the heck. Now not only do I have to worry about possible typos because my fingers are trying to keep up with my thougths but I also have to make sure that I type "you" to a sub/slave, even if it's at the beginning of a sentence. Since I was born in the Domincan Republic and came here when I was , I worked hard to learn this how to read, write and speak English very well. I just can't help but to write in the way I was taught to write with the appropriate capitalizations based on sentence structure and not on the status of who I'm writing in this lifestyle.

I think they know and can remember that they're a sub and if they can't well then they'll either have to be retrained by me (if I feel they're worth the effort) or they'll have to keep searching.

Now, if they want to continue their method of typing, that's up to them but ...hope you understand! Enough said!

Contesa

_____________________________

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It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves.
William Shakespeare
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In a world of so many variables, why do you have to be the norm? Anonymous

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Post #: 66