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RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/11/2006 8:37:34 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

quote:

Stop, take a step back from women, improve yourself, and your life ... get your game together and stop whining like a pussy or women ... no matter what their role ... won't be attracted to you.  Learn to like yourself more ... and do the things that help you to do that.  Workout, take a class on someting you're good at ... boost your confidence through these things and you'll just walk a little taller and talk just a little bit slower and before you know it ... girls will start to notice.

This concludes my seduction tips 101 rant (giggles).  Girls, tell the man that I'm right ... for his sake ... even though he's likely too much of a human excuse factory to do much about it.
Yes Belkincp, he is right, so listen to him!
If you behave more like Fckmeimirish, we'll phuck you sometime, even if you aren't Irish.   M

It's just a shame that Fckmeimirish is a male dom!

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/11/2006 10:44:10 AM   
sugarcoatedscamp


Posts: 120
Joined: 5/5/2006
From: Fort Wayne, IN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RosaB

quote:

ORIGINAL: feylin

Good evening:

While I was reading belkincp's reply, I thought it was pretty funny.  Perhaps his extreme example is meant in jest.  (I thought this because the spelling errors looked like they took some extra effort and if he was any more over the top we'd have to put a chute on him for safety reasons.)  Just my opinion.  No one here is really upset, are they?  Or is the banter just stress relief and I'm holding up the line? <smiles>

christine


That's what I was thinking as well.  It was in my eyes apparent the spelling and grammatical errors were purposely injected.  An intentional afront to the OP's suggestions, otherwise  OMFG.   


Check out his other forum posts.  If it's an act, it's a long-term engagement.

_____________________________

Consent means never having to say, "I'm sorry."
If beating you is wrong, I don't wanna be right.
I got an A+ in online bdsm.
You can call me Master now!

(in reply to RosaB)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/11/2006 10:56:39 AM   
sugarcoatedscamp


Posts: 120
Joined: 5/5/2006
From: Fort Wayne, IN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: paCDponygirl

  Certainly in the past I have made mistakes in letters I have written in content, spelling, punctuation and or grammar. Since the response rate from Dommes is less than 5% in my experience, it has been hard to figure out what it was that put them off. At one point I even wrote to many asking them for advice about why they did not take the time to reply one way or another. Was I disrespectful? Was it not written well? Did I not go into your needs enough? Were you just not interested in what I was interested in?
   The letters have ranged from as little as one paragraph to as many as twenty. The shorter ones were usually to Dommes who listed their location as, Pennsylvania (which is a big state) or The East Coast. There would be a short introduction and an inquiry as to whether or not they were near Philadelphia as location is an issue for me. As time went by I realized that crossdressers are not much liked (see thread 'why don't Mistresses like cds?) and I would inquire about that as well if I could not get any indication from reading their profile. These are two deal breaking issues to me and if one or the other is out, then there is no point in spending alot of time writing a long detailed letter. For those about to jump on the "just another lazy slave who doesn't get it" band wagon, I simply say: PLEASE, don't even go there. Any sub out there will tell you that when it comes to Domme/Mistress response rates, they are very, very, very low. Maybe this is part of the problem. I realize that Dommes get inundated with emails and many of them are one liners, but how many hours can you spend writing long, detailed letters to mistresses and getting no repsonse? Not a negative response, NO repsonse, before you stop putting as much effort into your emails? As subs we need to take our fair share of the blame. Lord knows there are many, many A-hole guys out there. I understand that, but I think that as Dommes, you need to start taking some responsibility for the poor quality of emails you receive too. How many e-mails do you not respond to?


I can relate to your response rate issue, but from the dominant perspective.  I can't tell you how many interested emails I've sent out to submissive women, with no response.  I can see when they read them, but there's no indication of their interest (or, more likely, their lack thereof) if all they do is read and delete.  Personally, I wouldn't even mind a quickie I'm-not-interested-in-you-but-I-appreciate-your-interest-in-me note.  I try very hard to say something in response to every email I receive, even if it's just pointing out that the writer is a jackass. *wink*  Sure, it's not the most pleasant email they might receive from me, but at least they know I'm not interested.

< Message edited by sugarcoatedscamp -- 10/11/2006 11:00:12 AM >


_____________________________

Consent means never having to say, "I'm sorry."
If beating you is wrong, I don't wanna be right.
I got an A+ in online bdsm.
You can call me Master now!

(in reply to paCDponygirl)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/11/2006 11:27:18 AM   
MissyRane


Posts: 1032
Joined: 5/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sugarcoatedscamp

I can relate to your response rate issue, but from the dominant perspective.  I can't tell you how many interested emails I've sent out to submissive women, with no response.  I can see when they read them, but there's no indication of their interest (or, more likely, their lack thereof) if all they do is read and delete.  Personally, I wouldn't even mind a quickie I'm-not-interested-in-you-but-I-appreciate-your-interest-in-me note.  I try very hard to say something in response to every email I receive, even if it's just pointing out that the writer is a jackass. *wink*  Sure, it's not the most pleasant email they might receive from me, but at least they know I'm not interested.

I wholeheartedly agree with that..I always reply...whether it's a polite reply or not then they'll always get a reply..and the reply is usually in tact with how much respect they show me in their letter except when I'm receving the same email from the person for the 5th time or more..then I start becoming a little bit pissed ahem lets not go into those details..

< Message edited by MissyRane -- 10/11/2006 11:28:12 AM >

(in reply to sugarcoatedscamp)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/11/2006 11:57:02 AM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: paCDponygirl
    For the past 15 years I have been actively seeking a Domme through websites like this, AOL profiles, Yahoo profiles, local events, etc. with no luck. Not only am I a sub male but I am also a crossdresser so the odds are not in my favor. That is ok. If  I am not someone's cup of tea, so be it. My profiles have been very detailed in the past. Recently I have toned them down a bit thinking maybe they were too detailed and scared prospective Dommes away. Never the less there is still a good deal of information about me in them.


Your profile is good as such things go, though I personally would rather see more non kinky, real life human personality stuff in a profile and less of a detailed kink laundry list.  Still, not everyone shares my preferences, so it might be good to have that information out there.


quote:

In the end, I find it hard to believe that the root of my loneliness boils down to bad spelling, punctuation and or grammar. Having said that and having no other information to go by, I will certainly make an effort to do better at these things in the future. Of course, none of them are strong points for me.


Your writing is perfectly fine.  It can be difficult to find a partner when you come with a very large baggage load of fetishes and complicated activities that are (presumably) necessary to keep you happy and that are not necessarily everyone else's fetishes.

Back when I owned a dungeon, I would have cheerfully considered someone like you as a good live in "housegirl" for the premises.  Lots of equipment, lots of chances for you to be in role, lots of dommes around to amuse themselves with the interesting exotic.  But I'd still want to go home and relax with a less demanding partner where I did not have to operate a million complicated toys just to have some fun.   There's a limit to the time I want to spend with a high maintenance sub who needs a lot of accessories (and a lot of my time and energy messing with those accessories) to feel happy and owned.  I want to go home to a sub partner whose primary interest is in me personally whether there are any special clothes or toys involved or not. 

This isn't a condemnation of you.  Fetishists are really fun to play with.  But unless you're a fetishist too, a fetishist tends to be a difficult matchup as a primary partner.  If you're okay with poly, you might be an excellent and much treasured "exotic" in the stable of someone who already has a primary?  Or if you're flexible on the fetish end and willing to be less high maintenance, it might increase your chances of finding a primary partner.


(in reply to paCDponygirl)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/11/2006 2:24:14 PM   
fckmeimirish


Posts: 27
Joined: 5/11/2006
Status: offline
 

quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

quote:

Stop, take a step back from women, improve yourself, and your life ... get your game together and stop whining like a pussy or women ... no matter what their role ... won't be attracted to you.  Learn to like yourself more ... and do the things that help you to do that.  Workout, take a class on someting you're good at ... boost your confidence through these things and you'll just walk a little taller and talk just a little bit slower and before you know it ... girls will start to notice.

This concludes my seduction tips 101 rant (giggles).  Girls, tell the man that I'm right ... for his sake ... even though he's likely too much of a human excuse factory to do much about it.
Yes Belkincp, he is right, so listen to him!
If you behave more like Fckmeimirish, we'll phuck you sometime, even if you aren't Irish.   M

It's just a shame that Fckmeimirish is a male dom!


Is it a shame that I'm male ... or that I'm a dom? 

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/11/2006 2:49:28 PM   
Araven


Posts: 149
Joined: 3/16/2006
Status: offline
Thank you for such wonderful advise. As a single submissive who just discovered this part of him, and dealing with all the complex emotions and questions that accompany said discovery, I truely appreciate such wonderful advise!

I can only hope one day to find a wonderful dominant woman in my life who I can each and every wake up and make happy *smiles*

Thank you again

- Araven

(in reply to fckmeimirish)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/11/2006 3:11:08 PM   
paCDponygirl


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/6/2006
Status: offline
     It is good to hear that many of you try and respond to the emails. Unfortunately that has not been my personal experience. In regard to Miss Najakcharmer, I understand that I am a bit more peculiar than most. Some of what I have listed are things that I need and some are things that I have dabbled in to various degrees and enjoy but are not essentials. Originally i thought that having such a diverse range of fetishes and kinks would make me more attractive to people. Sort of a something for everyone approach, but it is turning out not to be the case. Anyway, the beat goes on.......well not literally. :)
lauren

(in reply to Najakcharmer)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/11/2006 6:11:23 PM   
BalletBob


Posts: 1645
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline
Sugarcoatedscamp and TigerPurrs, you are so right, but then again, so is Sissifytoserve. I have a LOT of pictures, but they don't do anything for me, since there aren't many Mistresses in Southern New Jersey. Now somone tried to correct me on this once, and they didn't see any problem, that most of the Mistresses listing New Jersey, didn't want Cyber, Married Men, lived in the North, or wanted "TRIBUTE", which amounted to money. It does take both parties to work it out.

It is very easy as you ladies say to use a Web Cam to capture Pictures, and I even used my Web Cam a a few occasions with Mistress Haley, but she moved and does not have the time anymore. At least she was as PLEASED as I was, and we both enjoyed what she had me do, which is what I was there for. I am not there just for my enjoyment or fun, but for BOTH of us.

Do take care all, and I wish you many happy times, with what ever you seek, and find.

Waiting for a Mistress and Halloween, BalletBob

< Message edited by BalletBob -- 10/11/2006 6:12:54 PM >


_____________________________

"I get my kicks above the Waistline, Sunshine"

(in reply to sissifytoserve)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/12/2006 12:20:23 AM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: paCDponygirl

    It is good to hear that many of you try and respond to the emails. Unfortunately that has not been my personal experience.


It really depends on the emails.  I will respond to 100% of the emails that meet the criteria that I request in my profile.  Eg, friendly, chatty and sociable, with no nonconsensual D/s roleplaying or explicit sexual/kinky proposals.  I will delete and probably block all of the emails from guys who make it obvious that they have no interest in talking normally like a real human being and have not bothered to read anything I wrote in my profile.  That degree of selfish disregard for my wishes and my interests is a hard limit deal breaker from the start, and there is no reason to give these people any more respect or consideration than they are giving me. 

quote:

Originally i thought that having such a diverse range of fetishes and kinks would make me more attractive to people. Sort of a something for everyone approach, but it is turning out not to be the case.


It's possible that your "fetish laundry list" is causing you to be regarded as a "high maintenance sub".   That would be my personal take on the matter.  It's also possible that my perspective is not shared by others.  I don't know; I can't speak for everyone.   Asking for helpful input on the subject from other dommes might be useful.

**waves at other dommes**  So, is this a common perspective?  Does a subbie who has a long list of advanced and complicated fetishes on his or her profile strike you as more or less attractive as a play partner?  Does a long list of interest translate to you as "high maintenance" or "open minded and flexible"?

(in reply to paCDponygirl)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/13/2006 6:36:34 AM   
samiq8


Posts: 7
Joined: 10/12/2006
Status: offline
thank you Mistress

(in reply to MissyRane)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/13/2006 6:50:35 AM   
MistressStchWich


Posts: 74
Joined: 8/31/2005
Status: offline
That would be the key point.... we are dealing with mankind...lol...Seriously, I have been seeking the perfect cuckold all my life and have yet to find him....That being the case, do I get to whine, too? Hahaha...The question is:  Are you seeking a relationship or a playmate? I seek a relationship...and finding that takes a time and effort and yes, a great deal of patience; but it will happen. Playmates? They are everywhere, and usually available within 10 minutes of posting your profile...just post that you seek immediate gratification and I am sure you will find you are inundated with applicants....on the appropriate sites...they do have them...I see the ad in the left margin everytime I sign in to CollarMe...lol

< Message edited by MistressStchWich -- 10/13/2006 6:53:27 AM >


_____________________________

Freedom is an expensive enterprise, but well worth the cost. Especially when extracted from the enemy. `Erehc Krueger

(in reply to HCWT1)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/13/2006 10:00:59 AM   
MissyRane


Posts: 1032
Joined: 5/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: samiq8

thank you Mistress


*up on ma friggin toes n grabs the whip*  you are sooooo very welcome ....sub!

(in reply to samiq8)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/13/2006 10:19:46 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fckmeimirish

quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

It's just a shame that Fckmeimirish is a male dom!


Is it a shame that I'm male ... or that I'm a dom? 

Male and dom in that combination.....:-(

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to fckmeimirish)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/13/2006 10:22:05 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BalletBob
.... since there aren't many Mistresses in Southern New Jersey. Now somone tried to correct me on this once, and they didn't see any problem, that most of the Mistresses listing New Jersey, didn't want Cyber, Married Men, lived in the North, or wanted "TRIBUTE", which amounted to money. It does take both parties to work it out.

Are you sure of that?  Many of them come into Philly for the Cherry Street Munch, go down to AC for the ACDS munch in Absecon or shoot down 295 for the NDDS munch in Wilmington.  Trust me, we're here.  We just may not be into what you seek.....as in my own case.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to BalletBob)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/13/2006 11:06:04 AM   
fckmeimirish


Posts: 27
Joined: 5/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

quote:

ORIGINAL: fckmeimirish

quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

It's just a shame that Fckmeimirish is a male dom!


Is it a shame that I'm male ... or that I'm a dom? 

Male and dom in that combination.....:-(


I feel like such a piece of meat all of a sudden (grins mischeviously).  You're flattery will get you nowhere ... but that's no reason to stop (chuckles). 

Thank you, Pandora (smiles warmly).

Shawn

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/13/2006 11:54:48 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fckmeimirish

quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

quote:

ORIGINAL: fckmeimirish

quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

It's just a shame that Fckmeimirish is a male dom!


Is it a shame that I'm male ... or that I'm a dom? 

Male and dom in that combination.....:-(


I feel like such a piece of meat all of a sudden (grins mischeviously).  You're flattery will get you nowhere ... but that's no reason to stop (chuckles). 

Thank you, Pandora (smiles warmly).

Shawn

Total thread hijack.  Trust me, you've only begun to feel like meat if you continue to come here and tease us, handsome LOL

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to fckmeimirish)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/22/2006 4:55:22 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressStchWich

That would be the key point.... we are dealing with mankind...lol...Seriously, I have been seeking the perfect cuckold all my life and have yet to find him....That being the case, do I get to whine, too? Hahaha...The question is:  Are you seeking a relationship or a playmate? I seek a relationship...and finding that takes a time and effort and yes, a great deal of patience; but it will happen. Playmates? They are everywhere, and usually available within 10 minutes of posting your profile...just post that you seek immediate gratification and I am sure you will find you are inundated with applicants....on the appropriate sites...they do have them...I see the ad in the left margin everytime I sign in to CollarMe...lol


(This is amazing...because I am the perfect cuckold!!!)

(Is this too perfect or what?)

(in reply to MistressStchWich)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/22/2006 4:58:10 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: belkincp

dont beleive anythign these so called dominat women say..its all BS....thay dont know qnything about men..and r clueless to what itsl ie kto be a man...to work hard endlessly to ask girls out and never get laid....they dont know how much rejection a guy goes throguh..and girls get hit on al lthe time and asked out..they dont know shit....if ur a guy..and u want a girl...u get write too much for 1 girl ..its a waste of time..ultimatly she wont care waht u say anyways..its how u look....
if brad pitt look a like jsut said..hi im in ur area......... and a danny devito look a liek said 5 pages of love and funny and witt..the girl would pick the brad pitt so just do what u got to do and dotn listen to dumb girls...just cus some guys r ur bitxches and r retards..doesnt mean ur smart or kool or even respected...respected is an aura one has that can bee seen by anyone  not just ur subs..or shall i say guys with no self esteem or dignity or brain...thx have fun


(My brain hurts)

(in reply to belkincp)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: A letter to single submissives - 10/22/2006 5:56:59 PM   
Morrigel


Posts: 492
Joined: 10/13/2006
Status: offline
Um, I think what he said was, "Hi, I don't listen to women or try to understand them when they talk, 'cause...uh...I'm not much with the listening or the talking.  And I'm really hoping that all women are as stupid and shallow as I think, and that looks are all that counts to them...'cause I think maybe my picture looks pretty good, and...uh...that's pretty much all I've got going on.

Maybe if I spell really badly, none of the girls will be able to figure out that I hate women, that I'm full of self-pity and bitterness, and that my sense of entitlement is roughly the size of the Chrysler building."

I think that sums it up pretty well.

--M

(in reply to amaidiamond)
Profile   Post #: 60
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