quote:

ORIGINAL: SirKenin

That is really sad.  $350 goes a long way towards putting food on the table.  Sorry to hear this, but at the same time it is yet another reason why you do not search online for a mate.  There is a reason they are there, just remember that.

The benefit of the whole thing will be in if you learned from your mistake, which it sounds like you have.

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

I guess I'm in the minority here, but some of the things that red flagged me were that she's living in a hotel, can fit all of her stuff in her car and wants to relocate after a very short time and is willing to relocate without meeting or building a relationship first.  That shows that she has no roots to anything and is possibly desperate and (dare I use the word), not real. Again, I don't understand why anyone would give money to a stranger.  It's a foreign concept to me.  But then I don't have the type of wealth that would allow me to do it anyway.  I'd be suspicious of someone I was in a relationship with for a short amount of time requesting money from me.  

quote:

ORIGINAL: Argentopal

You will all shake your heads when I tell you our little story!  This was not, at least we do not think it was, a "scam" in the typical sense of the word.  Althought I have wondered if it might have been.  About a year ago now, we met a young lady on line, tho not on CM.  We were actively looking for a young lady to join us as part of our family in a poly - Ds - bdsm long term, live in relationship.  We did not expect or even want it to happen over night and we had certain "rules" about how it would go, including emails, chats, phone calls and when the time was right, a short visit for a set time (weekend up to 2 weeks depending on the young lady's availabilty to travel, be out of college or work, etc)  After all that we would see how it felt.
Let me say that my Daddy is so trusting and wanted so much to really help someone (yes, there is that "white knight" thing) if they needed help.  So, he met this young lady on another site and began corresponding.  Then she would be "offline" for about 2 weeks while she relocated to a different state for a change in schools.  She seemed to have a good college/career plan and Daddy decided that even though it would mean waiting 2 years for her to be done with the college she had enrolled in, if we were all getting along and we could manage some in person visits back and forth, it would still work out.  She moved to a new city with no job in place, no concrete plans for income, and found an apartment through a website where people advertise for rommates.  She acted "concerned" about paying for her room and food etc, but kept saying it would all work out.

It worked out when Daddy wired her $$ for her 1st month's rent, plus a little extra just for her.  While she did not ask outright, she whined and went on about not knowing what she would do, how she would eat, even not having bus fare to get to class.  She also knew exactly how to wire $$ Western Union andknew exactly where the nearest WU place was for to go get it.  I did not approve of sending her the money and it caused some problems here for us, but in the end it was not my decision to make - I am allowed to voice opinions but the decision was his to make.

She was looking for a job but had to keep up her school work, of course.  She was borrowing her roommates computer to chat and emial, so time was limited.  Her cell phone was a pay in advance type, and she had no $$ to pay.  This was all solved when Daddy put his credit card on her cell phone account, and then sent her an "old" laptop ( I do not ahve a laptop, new or old!) so she could chat with us at better times.  He also installed a new wireless card so she could use her roommates account to chat, which the roommate was Ok with.  Her job search did not go well.  Guess who paid the second month's rent + extra for utilities?  All along I was putting together little gift boxes with packs of hot cocoa, tea, shampoo, candles, bath stuff, and so on and sending it to her (my attempt to be nice to someone Daddy obviously liked a lot).
She did get a job and things "fell apart" when Daddy got upset over her not returning phone calls for over a week, not doing any of the things he requested of her (like sening us an email everyday just telling us what she had done, how school was, work, etc - not long just a note each day.  He finally set a time limit and told her she HAD to set aside one evening after work to call us and gave her a four day time frame to select from so as not to make too difficult for her with school and work.  We got NO call at all.  A week later he sent her an email asking her what was going on.  No reply.  Finally he left another message on her voice mail saying it appeared to us as if she was not interested and perhaps it was time to end things. That call was returned in about 2 minutes, literally!  He again set a time limit for her to set aside time for a good phone call so we could talk about what was going on.  A week later, no call, no emials.  So we both wrote her an email telling her how sorry we were that things had not worked out and wished her good luck.  That got an emial response belittling us about our lack of patience and how we must not have been serious to allow "one little blip" to end the relationship!

Our cost  .... more than $2,000.00!  And yes, it was "tuition" and Daddy promised to listen more carefully when I tried to caution him!  Ah well, live and learn - and we are not especially gullible and have "been around the block" before.  It can happen to all of us depending on the circumstances.

MsOpal

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied It would never occur to me to give money to strangers whom I barely know and have never met. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: nighthawk3569

"Having a man take the time to lead me on by spending time with me, chatting, e-mails and phone painting a grand picture of our plans for the future. It just blows me away that there are those that can be so unfeeling."  subbie 12

Women do the same thing...lead a man on, then appearently finding a 'better deal', they're gone. 
                                               'hawk

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Anyone who pretends NEVER to have fallen for a scam is a liar.