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RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/15/2006 9:23:18 PM

Mavis

Posts: 828
Joined: 2/8/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: siamsa24

There are questions that are not really ment to be answered specifically, and that is one of them. Perhaps you do not understand why I came here to ask this question.

i think i understand... when i'm not sure about something, i might ask others, have you been here, what was the end result of your decision? would you choose that same again? why? why not? it doesn't make my mind up for me, it gives me perspectives i might not be able to tune to because i'm not there yet.

That said. Hubby dislikes tatoos. i dislike guns in the home. W/we agreed, after the kids are 18, W/we'd both get to do those things as they wouldn't have effect on the kids. (LOL, ok, that was youth talking, i didn't consider i might feel the same about guns in house with grandkids, and He didn't consider my having a tatoo wouldn't "effect" kids or grandkids!)

Welp, He got his guns in the house legally licenced, etc, but i didn't go get a tat. Until W/we had a major upheaval, nearly split, and i went on my "I'm going to run with scissors and do WTF i want!" mode in reaction to His new gigs.

W/we got fixed, and i have this tat, it's ok.. but it reminds me of.. a very painful time in my life i really don't need to keep seeing.. reminds me of when i choose to do something specifically because i knew it would irk him.. but then, it also reminds me of a span of independance that was both positive and negative in my life.

Whatever you do, remember it will be there forever, and it will remind both you and him of SOMEthing... Can you put off that decision for a year and see if what it will remind you of will be something positive or negative?

_____________________________

~ Mavis

none of this applies to me, i'm only playing with lables this week.

(in reply to siamsa24)

Post #: 41

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/15/2006 9:51:04 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

Yes, that's what I was going to say. I was also going to wonder aloud to the OP about why you're getting married to someone with whom you don't have a "100% defined relationship." Marriages rarely work anyway--they almost never work when the parameters of the relationship are nebulous. But that's your business.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SlaveAkasha

If it's not that type of relationship, M/s, then it's your body and you can do what you want.

(in reply to SlaveAkasha)

Post #: 42

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/15/2006 10:12:28 PM

BuxomGoddess714

Posts: 91
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: So.California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster
I was also going to wonder aloud to the OP about why you're getting married to someone with whom you don't have a "100% defined relationship." Marriages rarely work anyway--they almost never work when the parameters of the relationship are nebulous. But that's your business.

quote:

That freaked Me out too....

She also made a brief comment with a "ehehehehe" when someone said "like meeting a stripper and expecting her to change her job" and said he took two of her piercings out in her sleep. oh dear.

I'd be getting counseling before I'd worry about tattoos and piercings.... There are some HUGE issues here that look like a train wreck in motion. Tats and piercings would be the last thing on My mind.

My facial piercings did NOT leave scars but my nipple piercing did. However, it did not effect my ability to lactate or nurse, if that is what you are concerned with as far as having children. Everyone heals differently and I'd discuss it with My piercer, tho if I was you.

Be blessed,
Goddess

_____________________________

The truth is that there is nothing noble in being Superior to somebody else. The only real nobility is in being Superior to your former self.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 43

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/15/2006 10:30:41 PM

sunnydays

Posts: 116
Joined: 4/8/2006
Status: offline

i have had my nipples pierced...adn when i met my Master, he didn't like them so I took them out. It took about 4-5 days for them to close over completly adn i have no scars. FWIW

(in reply to SlaveAkasha)

Post #: 44

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/15/2006 11:57:03 PM

gypsylee

Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline

hmm. that's a tricky one. i don't have any tatts cos i'm wary of anything permanent (but i love the look of them and i love piercings.)

my ex-husband hated the idea of tatts on women so that put me off them even more. my current partner actually encouraged/inspired me to get a couple of my piercings redone (i'd had to take them out during a stay in hospital and had left them out).

i think what i'm getting at is that even tho i like body mods, i'm easily swayed by the feelings of people i want to "impress". eg. i'd hate it if my bf looked at me and thought "urgh" cos of my piercings or didn't wanna kiss me cos i've got bits of metal in my mouth. i've got a "below the waist" one on my list which i definitely wouldn't have done if it put him off that area ;)

so yeah, being the vain submissive that i am, i'd not only resist urges to get more piercings, i'd take existing ones out. dunno what i'd do about tattoos... i guess that's why i don't have any.

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.

(in reply to siamsa24)

Post #: 45

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 12:04:44 AM

canupleaseme

Posts: 775
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

hi this is just a quick reply re scarring
i have had my left nipple peirced twice i had to take them out each time for different reasons (one got caught in play ouch !!! ) and neither times has it altered the lookof my nipple. the second i removed for breast feeding purposes when ihad my daughter and just never got round to putting back in and it didnt affect feeding in any way at all. I cant wait to get it done again it was definatly my fav body peircing. i hope this has been of some help

_____________________________

Proud mistress

(in reply to SlaveAkasha)

Post #: 46

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 12:12:27 AM

gypsylee

Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

...You're barking up the wrong tree here, we have no answers for you.

gah. how sad that the OP got put off reading the thread. Rover, sorry bud but i've got answers for siamsa and i don't appreciate total strangers speaking for me.

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.

(in reply to Rover)

Post #: 47

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 12:18:55 AM

gypsylee

Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: canupleaseme

...I cant wait to get it done again it was definatly my fav body peircing...

canuple... my D would like me to get mine done (tho it's not something He goes on about or anything)... i've got this idea in my head that they don't look good on big boobs but i definitely wouldn't rule it out... can you tell me why it's your fave piercing?

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.

(in reply to canupleaseme)

Post #: 48

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 12:22:02 AM

Kedicat

Posts: 251
Joined: 3/13/2005
Status: offline

Why do you want piercings and tats?

Possibly, as your Dominant, I would question the motivations, and the satisfactions.
Some get tats and piercings as a form of self control or worse, self mutilation, when they feel they have no control, or are being physically/emotionally mutilated/abused by another that they feel they cannot control.

A Dominant would rightly be concerned about your motivations/needs for them. And maybe challenged/jealous of the lack of control of you getting them.

Discuss having him learn to give you piercings. Then it is in his control, and maybe his very great pleasure to do. As to tats. Would you be willing to be his canvas, as far as choice of tats? Doing is unlikely. But choosing may be satisfying to both.

(in reply to siamsa24)

Post #: 49

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 12:30:18 AM

canupleaseme

Posts: 775
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

well i have 36 dd boobies

and i opted for a bar because i felt they looked better than a hoop personally on my boobs and i loved it becasue even if you just get cold you feel it there and its a contstant nice twinge on my nipple bein domme ove never experienced nipple tourture with it but the possibilities are endless its particually mindblowing if you hold a vibrator to the bar !!!!
and i think it looks very sexy too

_____________________________

Proud mistress

(in reply to gypsylee)

Post #: 50

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 12:36:07 AM

leakylee

Posts: 747
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline

I can second my nipples as being my favs. Well I think they are about the prettiest. I have each of them done twice, to form the cross, done with the bars. Out of all of my peircings, I think those are the most enhancing. The more holes the merrier.. hehe..

Lee

_____________________________

I am so not right, that I left..

(in reply to canupleaseme)

Post #: 51

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 12:54:58 AM

gypsylee

Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kedicat

...Some get tats and piercings as a form of self control or worse, self mutilation...

err. and how is this any different to WIIWD?! self mutilation is a dangerous form of release. bdsm and body mods are controlled and (relatively) safe forms of self-mutilation. IMO.

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.

(in reply to Kedicat)

Post #: 52

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 1:06:18 AM

MistressTexas

Posts: 425
Joined: 5/30/2006
Status: offline

The only piercing I've ever had a scar from ins my belly button. However its been pierced 7 times, ripped out twice and have nasty evil pussy infections twice.. So I'm not sure it counts. And even if it does, the scar is very small, barely raised, and smooth, with no discolorations. I've had my nipples done 3 separate times, because I was trying to create enough scar tissue that they would remail erect permanently. Nothin!! Which is not to say I never scar (in case youre wondering) I have several scars from 10-15 years ago, and many many more from god knows what. My piercings just dont scar though.

(in reply to gypsylee)

Post #: 53

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 5:21:55 AM

Rover

Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: nikaa
I don't judge you Rover, I don't know YOU.Do I have an opinion about you choose to express yourself, yes. However that there is a HUGE diffence between forming an opinion and judging.

nikaa, earlier I refused to believe that you could not be so challenged. You have proven me wrong.

I have highlighted, underlined, and colored red the appropriate passage in the definition of "opinion" for you. It's common for people to want to see themselves as less judgmental than others, and to redefine their own judgments as something with a less negative connotation. And for Pete's sake, enough with the idiocy of lifestylers somehow being non-judgmental as if the Holy Spirit has decended making all lifestylers non-judgmental, communicative, trustworthy and honest, etc. It's a fantasy, people... no matter how good it makes you feel about yourself.

As for your whine, it's nothing more than the pot calling the kettle black (or being a hypocrite, if you like). Though, in this case using judgment is (thankfully) a nearly universal human characteristic (lack of judgment being absent only in some who post in online forums).

But the larger problem is with the implication that somehow making judgments is "wrong". Without "judgment" you'd have no common sense, no way to evaluate people, things or ideas. All things and people would, in your mind, remain undiscernable. I would venture to say that is a very poor state of mind indeed.

Please, dismount from the "non-judgmental" high horse (or fantasy, if you prefer).

John

Main Entry: opin·ion

Pronunciation: &-'pin-y&n
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French, from Latin opinion-, opinio, from opinari
1 a : a view, judgment, or appraisal formed in the mind about a particular matter b : APPROVAL, ESTEEM
2 a : belief stronger than impression and less strong than positive knowledge b : a generally held view
3 a : a formal expression of judgment or advice by an expert b : the formal expression (as by a judge, court, or referee) of the legal reasons and principles upon which a legal decision is based
- opin·ioned

/-y&nd/ adjective

_____________________________

"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

(in reply to nikaa)

Post #: 54

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 5:32:56 AM

AmazonInk

Posts: 15
Joined: 3/24/2006
Status: offline

OK, a few things on this thread

Note: I trained as a professional piercer, and ran a tattoo/piercing shop, though I will admit it was a long time ago and I've gone a very different way since then, I still maintain my own piercings/tattoos and plan on getting more in the future.

He took them out in your sleep? WTF? In a M/s relationship he could/should have just done it with your knowledge, and in a vanilla relationship he shouldn't have touched your body without your consent. Have a re-think on that one girl, long and hard. The implications of this, on so many levels, are horrific.

Nipple piercings don't affect breastfeeding, and shouldn't leave a noticeable scar. Nor should any piercing, besides a small mark if you look very closely. In dark skin, there is often a build up of excess scar tissue. (These are called Ketoids? Or Keltoids? Sorry, as I said, long time since) A doctor will often tell you to have this scar tissue cut off, which actually causes more scarring, as the body thinks it's under attack. A Tea-Tree oil poultice applied twice a day to the area reduces swelling and promotes healing, most often solving the problem without surgery. And changing down to a lower guage piercing (usually from 1.6mm on a nipple to a 1.2mm) helps to leave room to heal without aggravation, and without taking the piercing out. It's easier to stretch back up after than to go through the whole process again with a fresh piercing!

Bad piercing leads to scarring, and problems with healing. As does not following your piercers instructions TO THE LETTER - they give those info sheets out for a reason people! The belly button is a hard to heal area, due to the rubbing of waistbands etc and the lack of air circulation. This applies to the nipples, but as this is a less common piercing, you will most often hear of complaints re belly button piercings. If you get them - Go Naked! Air helps to heal wounds, which a piercing is.

And, on a personal note - sort out the parameters of your relationship before you marry. Today in fact - make a start. Make a list, both of you, of your wants and one for your needs, within a relationship. Compare the two lists, and see what matches up, what doesn't, and therefore what you would be willing to compromise on and what you wouldn't. Be brutally, completely honest, especially with yourself. Sometimes people just don't match up, or need to change the nature of their relationship. A bed fellow might not be a good husband, and a Master may not make a comfortable boyfriend, Some do, some really don't!

With this done, you may find it easier to settle on what level of control you have over your own body?

And... one last thought - if he is truly happy with you, just as you are, why would he not accept you, tattoos, piercings, and all? Just for being you?

_____________________________

~ Otherwise known as Ms. Stick ~

Beir Bua!

(in reply to MistressTexas)

Post #: 55

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 5:41:12 AM

siamsa24

Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline

I think that everyone with concerns about our relationship should hear me out for a moment. Yes, I was a stripper and he made me quit, but it was really for my own good (if any of you have ever been in that scene you will understand). Yes, he took out a few of my piercings in my sleep. It sounds horrible, but it opened my eyes to his strong feelings in that area. I never want to get the facial piercings again, they are not really his thing and I can respect that (he left my body piercings in). He did it more to get my attention (kind of like how I cut off some of his hair while he was sleeping to make him get a haircut), it's just what we do sometimes.

As for our relationship not being 100% defined, it is not 100% defined in this lifestyle. Meaning that we are still exploring things. I should have been more specific.

(in reply to AmazonInk)

Post #: 56

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 5:47:15 AM

Iskander

Posts: 264
Joined: 9/26/2006
Status: offline

Gee Rover... what about 2a/b?
2 a : belief stronger than impression and less strong than positive knowledge b : a generally held view

Not a judgement in sight.. Selective editing can almost always prove what ever point one wants to make, yet it doesn't make the point gospel..
Of ALL the words in the definitions, it is my judgement that you chose the ONE word that suited you best...
As hinted on in 3a; a Judge when sentencing will seperate his opinon and his judgement... One leads to the other, but they are by no means the same thing...

Iskander...

(in reply to Rover)

Post #: 57

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 5:54:49 AM

gypsylee

Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: siamsa24

Should I just resist my urges to get body modifications just because he doesn't like them?
I am only looking for advice and opinions. Please let me know what you think.

siamsa, i don't think you owe anyone an explaination about your relationship. you asked for opinions about body mods, not marriage guidance counselling.

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.

(in reply to siamsa24)

Post #: 58

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 5:55:26 AM

Rover

Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

Iskander, is it really necessary for me to point out that we were talking about opinions and judgments, so the releveant portion of the definition of opinion was the use of judgment as a synonym? I guess so. Consider yourself enlightened.

And if I had edited the definition, I would not have included its entirety. Nothing was omitted.

And as for a judge offering an opinion, are you inferring that nikaa is a judge and we are in court?

Seriously, you couldn't make the grade school debate team with such a fervent desire to be "right" that you can't read what's plainly written.

And since you have such difficulty, I've also highlighted, underlined and placed in red the relevant passages associated with the definition of judgment (I think we can dispense with those passages dealing with a court or God, since we are neither). You cannot possibly be so obtuse as to continue this line of illogic (but I have been surprised before).

John

Main Entry: judg·ment

Variant(s): or judge·ment

/'j&j-m&nt/
Function: noun
1 a : a formal utterance of an authoritative opinion b : an opinion so pronounced
2 a : a formal decision given by a court b (1) : an obligation (as a debt) created by the decree of a court (2) : a certificate evidencing such a decree
3 a capitalized : the final judging of humankind by God b : a divine sentence or decision; specifically : a calamity held to be sent by God
4 a : the process of forming an opinion or evaluation by discerning and comparing b : an opinion or estimate so formed
5 a : the capacity for judging : DISCERNMENT b : the exercise of this capacity
6 : a proposition stating something believed or asserted
synonym see SENSE

< Message edited by Rover -- 10/16/2006 6:05:07 AM >

_____________________________

"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

(in reply to Iskander)

Post #: 59

RE: Tattoos and piercings - 10/16/2006 5:59:18 AM

Kalira

Posts: 954
Joined: 10/9/2006
From: Fort Wayne Indiana
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: siamsa24

I think that everyone with concerns about our relationship should hear me out for a moment. Yes, I was a stripper and he made me quit, but it was really for my own good (if any of you have ever been in that scene you will understand). Yes, he took out a few of my piercings in my sleep. It sounds horrible, but it opened my eyes to his strong feelings in that area. I never want to get the facial piercings again, they are not really his thing and I can respect that (he left my body piercings in). He did it more to get my attention (kind of like how I cut off some of his hair while he was sleeping to make him get a haircut), it's just what we do sometimes.

As for our relationship not being 100% defined, it is not 100% defined in this lifestyle. Meaning that we are still exploring things. I should have been more specific.

I see no reason for this Siamsa24. Most of us understood your original questions fully. There is no reason why you should feel as if you need to explain it to a few who perfer to make mountains out of molehills.
I am going to apologize. I find it horrible that a thread that could have had a good impact on showing others how a relationship COULD progress, was instead brought down to a level such as this.
/shakes head sadly

_____________________________

Facilius Per Partes In Cognitionem Totius Adducimur
We are more easily led part by part to an understanding of the whole.
Seneca

Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

(in reply to siamsa24)

Post #: 60

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