No Strings Housework (Full Version)

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BossySSBBW -> No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 9:04:18 AM)

Hello,
I have my definition of this subject, but I was wondering about other Dommes definitions of it.
My definition is a person enters someone's home, cleans thoroughly in whatever matter of dress that is acceptable to both parties, then the person who performed the tasks leaves.
I would think if there is play involved, this would be arranged before the meeting, but No Strings means no strings.




MzTlaz -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 9:17:12 AM)

I'd agree with you.  If any play was to be involved it would be discussed and agreed upon prior to the housework. 

I think a lot of male 'subs' (and I use the term loosely)  tend to assume if they show up and do their assignment dressed in a way that turns them on we'll be turned on also and give them what they desire.  Again....this makes me wonder about the 'sub'... real or in it for sexual gratification?  (and I say sexual gratification because that's my experience of what is wanted, sad but true).

It makes me seriously consider written contracts before engaging in any kind of service deal....maybe if it's in writing they'll take it more seriously?







canupleaseme -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 9:24:57 AM)

i would use the term no strings housework to describe what your saying perfectly.
I searched for a while for someone suitable for this in my employment but unfortuntaly its very difficult to find a male who is willing to serve just for that , well i found it hard anyway [&:]




MsCece2u -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 10:44:43 AM)

Ladies I could not agree more.  I think I found one male submissive that truly understands what No Strings means.  I think a written contract of sorts would be the best way to go.




MistressDolly -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 11:17:07 AM)

I agree that "no strings" means just that.  However, for the few that aren't particulary privy to typical standard protocal, drawing and executing a x is a good idea.




undergroundsea -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 11:51:12 AM)

While I agree that no-strings housework does mean house work without any play in return, I think it is important to recognize that there has to be some motivation for one to offer housework and that motivation must be identified and addressed for the service relationship to last.

I think there is potential in no-strings house work for passive dominance, which can sap the motivation a sub might have to provide such service if the sense of D/s is his motivation.

Cheers,

Sea




mstrjx -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 1:22:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea

While I agree that no-strings housework does mean house work without any play in return, I think it is important to recognize that there has to be some motivation for one to offer housework and that motivation must be identified and addressed for the service relationship to last.

I think there is potential in no-strings house work for passive dominance, which can sap the motivation a sub might have to provide such service if the sense of D/s is his motivation.

Cheers,

Sea


But let's take it further.  Let us imagine that the 'servant' is live-in.  Can't it be said that an adequate motivation for that servant simply to exist 'near' his mistress?  You might not feel that such a male exists, but to me this would be a very 'pure' relationship.

There would be no 'expectation' of a sexual or 'play' relationship outside of that, but the mistress could always 'treat' the servant from time to time in any way she feels.

Jeff




undergroundsea -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 2:22:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mstrjx
But let's take it further.  Let us imagine that the 'servant' is live-in.  Can't it be said that an adequate motivation for that servant simply to exist 'near' his mistress?  You might not feel that such a male exists, but to me this would be a very 'pure' relationship.

There would be no 'expectation' of a sexual or 'play' relationship outside of that, but the mistress could always 'treat' the servant from time to time in any way she feels.


I think the scenario you describe can indeed exist.

The OP describes a none-live-in arrangement, which is the context for my post. That said, I think my point applies in general.

I am considering this relationship scenario more from a practical standpoint than an ideal standpoint. You could say that ideally a sub would provide no-strings-attached service with a smile on an ongoing basis with no if's and but's. I think reality differs though. I think the success of any relationship depends on the sources of satisfaction and sources of dissatisfaction. For a no-strings-attached service relationship described in the OP, the only interaction or the chief interaction is the service. Thus, how a submissive feels about this service figures strongly into the overall satisfaction felt by the submissive about this relationship.

How a submissive feels about service will depend on how much or not does the service create a burden, which depends on time and energy required, the opportunity cost of this time and energy, and how a submissive feels about such work. Some people enjoy cleaning, some do not. If there is not satisfaction to outweigh the burden, I think the relationship will eventually wither.

I speak of the motivation in a general sense--I do not use it to suggest play or sex. Very few subs clean for the sake of cleaning; otherwise they would enjoy cleaning for all their friends and neighbors. There is something that motivates a sub to clean for a domme. These motivations vary from person to person and maybe one or more of the following: an expression of D/s, an expression of affection or admiration, maid fetish, desire to please, recognition, desire to clean or organize, expectations of a reward in the form of play, more. My point is that whatever this motivation is, it is important to identify it and see that it is addressed. If it is not, I think the service relationship will begin to dissipate.

Cheers,

Sea




sissifytoserve -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 2:41:44 PM)

As a submissive male crossdresser with some domestic leanings I don't belive in "no strings housework" whatsoever.

(uh oh...now i'm going to be called "not a true sub")

There has to be some exchange of some kind. I'm sure there are a tiny minority out there who get off on just cleaning...and expect nothing in return..
but it sure as hell isn't me.

For me...there has to be some kind of motivation....otherwise...I feel that I am just being used.

The hell with that.




nikaa -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 3:06:03 PM)

In my opinion saying someone is a "no strings" submissive,slave, or domestic servant is like saying someone is a "no limit" slave or submissive. Every relationship in my opinion has "strings" just as every submissive and slave has limits. So when I am approached by someone who calls themselve a "no-strings domestic servant, submissive or slave" I will always inquire further simply because I personally don't beleive such a beast exists.
 
If it was ONLY about doing house work, they could do that in a vanilla setting. They have needs beyond simply doing house work that are being meet at the same time. Weather it is subtle dominatation, humiliation, or simply pleasing their Dom/me or one of the many other possible reasons.
 
Personally I would NEVER enter into a D/s or M/s relationship even one with a domestic servant without a contract. Simply because by putting it on paper we are forced to discuss it in detail and there is less chance of miscommunications.




MsKatHouston -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 3:34:42 PM)

In a long term relationship no strings housework, I think means just that.  I do not always have time to play or even pay attention to someone who is cleaning my house during the day.  So the act itself is no strings.  However, the relationship in general is mutually satisfying.  The submissive gets his needs met at other times in other ways.  While the idea of no strings housework may be appealing, I don't think it is very realistic.  The sub is usually getting something out of it.




glassdoll -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 3:40:03 PM)

I call that a maid. And sometime you can even pay them to wear "outfits". See, it works out.




sissifytoserve -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 3:43:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: glassdoll

I call that a maid. And sometime you can even pay them to wear "outfits". See, it works out.


You don't have to even pay some of us...just respect, nurture, and cherish us.

A lot of so-called "dommes" actually believe being "dominant" has something to do with using people
and fucking them over.




damia -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 3:44:43 PM)

i thought no strings housework was something like when a submissive/slave does housework because Master says so, and for no other reason (besides that it probably needs doing). Like the dishes need doing, and Master says subbie has to do them, and subbie doesn't expect a reward for doing the dishes. Am i way off target, then?

damia the Kat




sissifytoserve -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 3:48:04 PM)

No..this has to do with Dommes expecting people they don't even know to clean their house...and then go away...conveniently.

Its a total crock...and anyone who falls for it..is a sucker.




damia -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 3:54:44 PM)

It sounds like you have some issues with Dommes, sissifytoserve. Perhaps it would be better to keep emotions out of intelligent conversation. "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." is a good philosophy to live by.

[edit: i don't think this requires a post of its own, but please note that i said this was an intelligent conversation, and did not call your or anyone else's post unintelligent. i just suggested to leave hateful emotions out of it.]

i don't think No Strings Housework is solely Dommes and male subs, anyway. i think if a Master required me to do housework without expecting any reward, i would still feel rewarded by the order to do such for Him. Same for a Mistress. But i personally would not do it outside of a D/s relationship, because it would be a matter of submitting to His or Her will, and i won't do that for just anyone.




sissifytoserve -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 3:59:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: damia

It sounds like you have some issues with Dommes, sissifytoserve. Perhaps it would be better to keep emotions out of intelligent conversation. "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." is a good philosophy to live by.




No..I won't leave out the harsh realities of what certain people who call themselves "dommes" here expect from subs....especially when it effects me.

I have an issue with USERS..if anything.....not true, intelligent..deserving dommes.

If you wish to call my postings "unintelligent". So be it..that's your opinion.




onlythewindknows -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 4:11:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsKatHouston

The sub is usually getting something out of it.


just knowing Master/Mistress's house is clean and comfortable for Him/Her is reward in itself.

not to mention having the privilage to have had some tiny part in it [;)].




nikaa -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 4:14:07 PM)

qoute:
But i personally would not do it outside of a D/s relationship, because it would be a matter of submitting to His or Her will, and i won't do that for just anyone.

end qoute

EXACTLY! Your needs would be meet in your service (you would be submitting to their will)therefore in my opinion there are strings attached.*smiles*





nikaa -> RE: No Strings Housework (11/5/2006 4:19:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sissifytoserve

quote:

ORIGINAL: damia

It sounds like you have some issues with Dommes, sissifytoserve. Perhaps it would be better to keep emotions out of intelligent conversation. "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." is a good philosophy to live by.




No..I won't leave out the harsh realities of what certain people who call themselves "dommes" here expect from subs....especially when it effects me.

I have an issue with USERS..if anything.....not true, intelligent..deserving dommes.

If you wish to call my postings "unintelligent". So be it..that's your opinion.


sissyfytoserve,
If someone conscents to such a relationship as a "no strings" domestic servant (no I am not saying there is such a beast simply a hypothetical) are they truly being used?
 
I have been approached by more than a handful of men who title themselves "no-strings domestic slaves". I don't approach them they approach me. So IF I did enter into such a relationship how could I be using them when they initiated the relationship?(again I am not saying I beleive there is such a beast as a no-strings domestic slave,submissive or servant).




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