Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women)


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) Page: <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 12/13/2006 7:18:08 AM   
adaddysgirl


Posts: 1093
Joined: 3/2/2004
From: Syracuse, NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel

Question his sexuality?  No. 

I would be more than happy to use my tongue or fingers in him if it gave him pleasure.  But NOT a strap on.  I couldn't go there. That would just be too weird for me, and yes, I admit, it would cause me to think differently about his dominance.  Can't help it.....  


Same here BRN.  And it's not about his possibly being gay...using a strapon on a guy is just not something i could do.  *shrugs*
 
Daddysgirl

(in reply to BRNaughtyAngel)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 12/13/2006 4:45:53 PM   
pixelslave


Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline 		First let me say to the OP that if a woman had that kind of attitude, it would simply tell me that she wasn't sufficiently informed and open-minded enough to be with a man such as me.  If she wasn't open to learning about anatomy and thinking differently, it would simply be time for us to part our ways.


quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

I wasn't sure what to do, how to do it or where in the world that prostrate thing was in the first place (I still have no clue). And my TONGUE at an exit for... other things?!!   Well...let's just say I was ... um... reluctant.



I highly recommend you purchase a book called "Anal Pleasure & Health, A Guide for Men and Women" by Jack Morin, PH.D.  It's a well known book that is frequently recommended for those in the lifestyle ever since it was first published (my copy is rev 3, copyright 1998 which I purchased originally from Amazon).   It should answer nearly any question you can think of.  It includes illustrations, instructions, tips, and a great deal more.


quote:


Regarding penetration, my only concern is that I have long-ish nails (not those claws I see so many women wearing, but still, they are aren't cut close.) I am SO afraid of hurting him - even if accidentally. So, unless there are ways I don't know about...I guess me doing that with my fingers is out.

Unless someone has a good idea?  How short should nails be anyway for that?



Besides using latex surgical gloves available from drugstores (feel free to double glove if you need to), one can also use the heavy duty kitchen kind.  You could also take bobbins (the kind used for sewing) or a finger rubber (the kind used for counting papers) or even cover the tip of your fingernail with heavy duty medical tape before covering it with a latex glove to prevent the nail from piercing the glove and hurting your master.  I'm certain there are other creative ways that you could think of besides just clipping and filing down your nail (such as using cotton balls to fill the void before covering it with tape and gloving up the finger); just figure out what works best for you and your partner.  I'm positive he'll let you know if something doesn't work!

- pixel

_____________________________

Chivalry isn't dead! It's for those who have it in their hearts & are willing to be taught. It's a way of life, a code of honor; this one's armor still needs some polishing!

(in reply to julietsierra)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/3/2008 11:39:29 AM   
DickStrong


Posts: 26
Joined: 3/28/2008
Status: offline 		Hmm, I keep getting asked (OK,only twice,  by girlfriends) and refusing. A doctor was up in there and it was only her finger but I don't think I could manage an object! Am I really missing something?

(in reply to MzMinx)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/3/2008 12:00:28 PM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		Nope, I don't think it reflects on either his gender OR his masculinity. Depending on the circumstances, it may not even reflect on whether he prefers being in the collar or holding the leash.

This is why it's important to ask questions and not jump to conclusions.

Firestorm


_____________________________

***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer

(in reply to TreSwank)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/3/2008 12:16:22 PM   
thornhappy


Posts: 8596
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline 		'Tis a dead thread, RIP.

thornhappy

(in reply to CallaFirestormBW)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/3/2008 2:25:53 PM   
DominantJenny


Posts: 645
Joined: 4/6/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DickStrong

Hmm, I keep getting asked (OK,only twice,  by girlfriends) and refusing. A doctor was up in there and it was only her finger but I don't think I could manage an object! Am I really missing something?


Should've started a new thread, but the answer is yes, you ARE missing out, unless you have some awfully unusual anatomy.

(in reply to DickStrong)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/3/2008 4:09:14 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		Guys have a prostate... why would it be unmasculine to use it for your own pleasure. I don't see how something only men have, a prostate, could ever be seen as unmasculine. That makes zero sense to me.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to TreSwank)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/3/2008 4:17:57 PM   
scarlettjinx


Posts: 117
Joined: 3/14/2008
Status: offline 		I would never think that this means a man is homosexual. I enjoy doing this and one of my fondest memories of Papa is after I did this to him the first time, he looked at me and asked how soon we could do this again!!!

I have had someone in a vanilla relationship tell me that the only kind of woman that would enjoy anal play is the type that had been severely sexually abused as a child, so there are kooks out there everywhere.

_____________________________

I'm not an artist, I'm a fucking work of art.
-MM

No longer knocked up. Proud mommy of a fourth of July baby!!!


***owned and operated by Newwacoguy***

(in reply to mstrjx)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/3/2008 4:26:14 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank

     If a man requests to be on the receiving end of anal play (fingers and/or objects up the ass), do you view him as being less masculine, or perhaps suspect that he's been lying to you about his sexual orientation?  This is actually more of a sensitive, personal issue that I had with an ex..............so I decided to throw it out in front of the general public on a free BDSM forum.

   Actual quote from ex-  "I thought only gay guys liked that."

This makes my mouth water just thinking about serving this one....however here goes....There is a place on a man’s body that, if you touch it, will make his toes curl and have him screaming for you to continue what you’re doing. It’s his prostate gland otherwise known as the male G-spot.
To locate the male g-spot, you need to penetrate a man’s anus. and need to understand that male sexual pleasure does not begin and end with the penis. If you don't want to go up there with fingers or your tongue try pressing gently upwards betwen his testicles and anus (a move in tantric massage). As a man ejeculates remove your 'insertion' or pressure to give heightened pleasure. It's a wonder there's a straight man in da house....PS a mark of a real man for me is one that knows his arse from his apex.

See: http://allwomenstalk.com/finding-the-male-g-spot/ 

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/buyersguide.cfm?article=42

http://everything2.com/title/Tantric%2520Sex 

http://www.kinkmassage.com/lingham.html

< Message edited by Prinsexx -- 7/3/2008 4:27:15 PM >

_____________________________

Owner of asterion

Metawhore.... the sound of a metaphore when gagged
Free woman
Resident thread finisher
To my stalker:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN2lP_7J7GI&feature=fvwrel

(in reply to TreSwank)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/3/2008 8:00:01 PM   
malloves69


Posts: 913
Joined: 9/15/2006
Status: offline 		my mistress knows my ass and prostate well  love being fisted by her and strapon play too  gladly bendover for her anytime she wants to take me  once she finds my prostate im at her mercy until she drains me of whatever cum i have inside of me  love the control aspect of it because i have no control over it i swear her fingers are magical  she is a awesome woman indeed  have fun mal

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/4/2008 1:46:27 AM   
candystripper


Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank

      If a man requests to be on the receiving end of anal play (fingers and/or objects up the ass), do you view him as being less masculine, or perhaps suspect that he's been lying to you about his sexual orientation?  This is actually more of a sensitive, personal issue that I had with an ex..............so I decided to throw it out in front of the general public on a free BDSM forum.

    Actual quote from ex-  "I thought only gay guys liked that."

 
Maybe.  I'd be 'rimming' for years as part and parcel of a great bj before I even knew about D/s -- and way before I had ever heard of rimming.
 
This is gonna get me a ton of sh*t, but I'm not willing to be intimate with a man who has had male partners.  Period.  There just isn't enough latex on earth for me with regard to this portential risk.
 
If a man asked for a butt plug, e.g., I might wonder....and ask.  If I didn't think I was getting a straight answer, I'd probably stop seeing him.
 
One reason I do not hop into bed with everything that swings a c*ck.
 
candystripper

(in reply to TreSwank)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/4/2008 2:08:11 AM   
SurrenderForMe


Posts: 229
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

If a man requests to be on the receiving end of anal play (fingers and/or objects up the ass), do you view him as being less masculine, or perhaps suspect that he's been lying to you about his sexual orientation?  This is actually more of a sensitive, personal issue that I had with an ex..............so I decided to throw it out in front of the general public on a free BDSM forum.


If a man requests he be on the receiving end of anal play, I get wet.   That less masculine thing is a guy thing, or unfortunately a reaction from the less open minded.  Strap ons, yehaa.  I think I spelled that incorrectly, oh well.

Being able to express your needs, wants and especially trusting enough to ask about something that he considers a taboo or scary issue, is very courageous.  Shooting it down is the easy way out. 
quote:

     Actual quote from ex-  "I thought only gay guys liked that."
  Sorry the ex was not more compassionate.  If something does not appeal, that is what I say.  I try not to add fuel to the issue. 

I would have at some point discussed or would discuss orientation, but unless I see some sign that he is drooling over another guy or woman, no big deal, he's with me.  If he was bi, I'd want to know for health reason and because it is part of who he is.  I'm sure it is possible for me to hook up with a closeted gay, but he'd die of shock with me.  I'd be trying to set him up.  My fee would be getting to direct the first sexual encounter.  Because the sadist in me would love to do that and howl.  Watching other people have sex is one of the funnies things I've ever seen.

Good luck.

(in reply to TreSwank)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/4/2008 8:01:02 AM   
barrieboytoy


Posts: 24
Joined: 2/15/2008
Status: offline 		Short answer, no.

The only thing that makes you a gay man is if the only people you're sexually attracted to are other men.



(in reply to SurrenderForMe)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 7/4/2008 8:30:37 AM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

Having taken it up the endzone, .................

Perfect sound bite......


_____________________________

Owner of asterion

Metawhore.... the sound of a metaphore when gagged
Free woman
Resident thread finisher
To my stalker:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN2lP_7J7GI&feature=fvwrel

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 9/2/2008 11:57:11 AM   
DickStrong


Posts: 26
Joined: 3/28/2008
Status: offline 		You've convinced me. Now what is the best way to ask for it?
It is ironic that I've had mouthes and my mouth everywhere even in casual settings and yet I can't really ask for something my doctor has done to me! 

(in reply to CandleInTheWind)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 9/2/2008 1:12:32 PM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank

     If a man requests to be on the receiving end of anal play (fingers and/or objects up the ass), do you view him as being less masculine, or perhaps suspect that he's been lying to you about his sexual orientation?  This is actually more of a sensitive, personal issue that I had with an ex..............so I decided to throw it out in front of the general public on a free BDSM forum.

   Actual quote from ex-  "I thought only gay guys liked that."


I have not read the thread, so am unaware of the discussion but to the OP ~~
 
My Sir will never consider himself bisexual as he would not prefer sex with a man, but he does like to humiliate male subs into any anal or cock worship.
His humiliation technique is to tell them how much better I am at sucking cock, balls and ass worship.
 
When we play with a male sub, no females have arrived who he is pleased with, and they beg for him to enter their anus, he refuses.  His cock only goes into my ass. edited to add, we play with bisexual or straight men never a gay man yet.
 
During our first several months together, he allowed me some freedom to explore my desires on his body. 
He had never had a sub who enjoyed ass worship and I do. (Something I had learned from a previous owner.)
 
My fingers and my tongue aroused him totally.  He admitted to me that no other sub had done such an awesome thing and it has become part of our  routine play.  In fact, I think there is a video of it on the "other" site.
 
I do not view him as less masculine but am sure damned proud I introduced something to him that arouses him totally.
 
I do believe, just as it takes finesse to please a woman orally, so it takes finesse to perform ass worship well.
 
The act of performing anything anal on a man is greeted by society as a whole to be homosexual, bisexual in nature.
http://www.collarchat.com/m_1917692/mpage_1/tm.htm
This thread proves the misnomers and judgments and silly ideas of people who think a straight man cannot enjoy anal worship or cock sucking from a male.
 
Its a shame that we have gender sexuality rather than the act in our minds to cloud our desires.

< Message edited by RealSub58 -- 9/2/2008 1:14:12 PM >

(in reply to TreSwank)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 9/2/2008 2:45:53 PM   
shivermetimbers


Posts: 2060
Joined: 6/7/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DickStrong

Hmm, I keep getting asked (OK,only twice,  by girlfriends) and refusing. A doctor was up in there and it was only her finger but I don't think I could manage an object! Am I really missing something?

Yes, you need a doctor with better foreplay.

Seriously though, the key is always patience and lubrication. Start slow, start small.  Your doctor has a hundred other assholes to check on, so she can't get caught up in taking her time till you relax.  Take things in at your pace, not your partner's.  You will find it's so pleasurable. 

To the OP, my ex was of the same attitude, to include anything to do with her ass. Got almost the same response as yours. Don't know if I made any sense when I said this to her, "It's just our asses dear. I mean really, a gazillion gay men can't all be wrong about this."

_____________________________

I love you Deanna, you make every day a better day.

If we descended from monkeys and apes, why are there still monkeys and apes?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ3CJi0Ih9s&feature=player_embedded

http://www.thebuccozone.com/piratesong.htm

(in reply to DickStrong)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 9/2/2008 3:01:28 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DickStrong

You've convinced me. Now what is the best way to ask for it?
It is ironic that I've had mouthes and my mouth everywhere even in casual settings and yet I can't really ask for something my doctor has done to me! 


I would hope a woman would respond to, "now my ass baby, with your fingers" as she was sucking your cock. 

Try it.

Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to DickStrong)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 9/2/2008 3:32:45 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		WOW!  I am so relieved.  And here I was getting all worried about how I was going to be gay because I liked anal play.  Good lord!  Just think what that would do to my vanilla-dom identity.

To answer the OP, no, mine does not see it as threatening either my masculinity or my dominance.  She seems to really really like the fact that I'm becoming more sexually aware across the boards.  Of course, to be fair, she is a kinky little mynx who's taking a great deal of delight in slowly corrupting my vanilla ways so I guess that attitude is predictable *laughs*  I can see right now that I've made a horrible mistake if I wanted to stay vanilla by acquiring a sex slave.

Does it make me a closet-gay?  Dunno, but that wouldn't bother her or me if at some point we learned I was bi. 
Does it make me less masculine?  No, I am what I am in her eyes and nothing so surface is likely to change it.
Does it make me less domly?  No, see above

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 9/2/2008 3:57:50 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		Leader darlin', that question was better than 2 years old, I think.  You're killing me.  There's a new question towards the end there.


Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to leadership527)
Profile   Post #: 100
Page:   <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) Page: <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.125