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Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 1:46:32 PM

TreSwank

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If a man requests to be on the receiving end of anal play (fingers and/or objects up the ass), do you view him as being less masculine, or perhaps suspect that he's been lying to you about his sexual orientation? This is actually more of a sensitive, personal issue that I had with an ex..............so I decided to throw it out in front of the general public on a free BDSM forum.

Actual quote from ex- "I thought only gay guys liked that."

< Message edited by TreSwank -- 11/6/2006 1:53:02 PM >

Post #: 1

RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 1:49:18 PM

MasterFireMaam

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From: Charleston, WV
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No, I don't see him as being less masculine nor does it make me think he's secretly gay. he simply likes that sex act.

Master Fire

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(in reply to TreSwank)

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 1:49:34 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank

If a man requests to be on the receiving end of anal play (fingers and/or objects up the ass), do you view him as being less masculine, or perhaps suspect that he's been lying to you about his sexual orientation?

Nope.

But I'm sure some do.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_555101/mpage_1/key_anal/tm.htm#555371
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(in reply to TreSwank)

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 1:50:25 PM

Aileen68

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Only if the end of the fingers belong to a man and the object is a dick.
Other than that...it's all good.

(in reply to TreSwank)

Post #: 4

RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:00:48 PM

serveuwell

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Absolutely not. Your ex sounds like a very close minded person. Did she think only lesbians liked receiving cunnilingus, too?

(in reply to Aileen68)

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:02:54 PM

Lashra

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I think he knows what excites him and isn't afraid of speaking out about it. My sub loves anal play and I know he isn't gay or anything like that. I appreciate a person who isn't afraid to speak up to their partner(s) about what is that they desire. Experimentation is what keeps things interesting IMHO. If women can enjoy anal play what is wrong with men enjoying it too? Not a darned thing.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

(in reply to TreSwank)

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:09:47 PM

daddysprop247

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From: DC Metro area
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i'm one of those women who find it a bit questionable when a supposedly straight man has a liking for fingers or toys up the bum. tho i'm not completely close-minded about it....i mean, i find nothing closet-homosexual about a man liking a woman's tongue up his bum, and that's actually a service that i enjoy giving very much. i suppose i just get uncomfy with the idea of taking it a step further to actual firm penetration...that's homoerotic to me, but if the man were otherwise 100% masculine, strong, dominant and aggressive, and he retained his control and dominance during the act, then i suppose my views on it could change.

(in reply to Lashra)

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:09:57 PM

Mikal

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So what does that make women who like anal play? Gay men trapped in women's bodies???

Nothing wrong with liking whatever... so long as it's between adults & doesn't include any animals, it's all good in my books.

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:15:11 PM

Bearlee

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From: South Central CO
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Personally, I believe those who enjoy anal play are more in tune with their bodies and what feels sensual. This goes for both men and women, gay or straight. Same with enjoying nipple play or enjoying the taste of themselves.

In fact, in spite of prefering 'manly-men' I always ask that question "Do you know what you taste like?" To me, a yes or no answer would indicate the person is open-minded, sexually experimental and highly sensual, and I like that in a person. Course, I'd prefer the answer from my male partner to be be yes to all the above; lordy, imagine the fun!

Nope, IMHO, such things have nothing whatsoever to do with sexual preference; only sensuality.

beverly

(in reply to Lashra)

Post #: 9

RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:16:53 PM

Morrigel

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Joined: 10/13/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank

If a man requests to be on the receiving end of anal play (fingers and/or objects up the ass), do you view him as being less masculine, or perhaps suspect that he's been lying to you about his sexual orientation?

No, I assume that he has two brain cells to rub together and knows that there's a nerve bundle up there that'll make him come like Vesuvius.

--M

(in reply to TreSwank)

Post #: 10

RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:17:21 PM

Aileen68

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Hey Tre...I dare you to ask this on Match or Eharmony.
Their brains would explode.

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Post #: 11

RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:20:02 PM

toservez

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From: All over now in Minnesota
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For the most part it would impress me that they could be honest and open to things. I have had a few vanilla situations of freaking out a man getting anywhere near that area with a tongue or finger, so I would find it to be a nice thing. Now if the man wants an object every or nearly every single time during sex in his ass and/or it looked like it was always the highlight of the event then I think that would get me concerned.

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(in reply to Mikal)

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:22:48 PM

GoddessDustyGold

Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank

If a man requests to be on the receiving end of anal play (fingers and/or objects up the ass), do you view him as being less masculine, or perhaps suspect that he's been lying to you about his sexual orientation? This is actually more of a sensitive, personal issue that I had with an ex..............so I decided to throw it out in front of the general public on a free BDSM forum.

Actual quote from ex- "I thought only gay guys liked that."

It's just another errogenous (sp?) zone. Some think that it automatically means gay, but I would repeat the question above "what does that make Women who enjoy receiving anal?"
People who assume that this is strictly a "gay sex" thing are either completely misinformed or uninformed, or, in the case of males who are afraid of it, often homophobic. It's one thing to say you don't enjoy anal, and you, in fact, don't...*Smile...and another to say you won't do it because it makes you gay.

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(in reply to TreSwank)

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:29:24 PM

agirl

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Joined: 6/14/2004
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Not in my experience. It's just sensations. Gay men are attracted to their own gender, not sensations alone.

agirl

(in reply to TreSwank)

Post #: 14

RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:33:08 PM

juliaoceania

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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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I do not view this as a question of sexual orientation whatsoever. The prostate gland can be stimulated this way and it has nothing to do with being gay. Whether or not that kind of play occurs is up to him, but my view of my partner's sexuality would not be affected if he wanted to experience this...I think it is silly that people think enjoying this has anything to do with one's sexual orientation...

_____________________________

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:34:07 PM

Kitsune2006

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Joined: 11/6/2006
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I don't think that it makes you less masculine. I remember when my boy requested to do it to me. I asked if he was gay! Plus thinking that he would respect me less if I let him. He happens to think that it is sexy, wanted to be where no man has gone on me and it was a curious fantasy for me. I had read lots of erotic on it. I have asked to do it to him, but I can say my motives to give what I got aren't at all like his. I don't find it sexy and am more intrested in the dominace point of it. So I have refrained from this form of play so far and I'm squeemish about the smell and fecal matter involved. So the best thing to do is talk to her. Encourage her to ask questions about it, even seemingly silly ones. It tends to be a taboo subject in maintream society, so she maybe trying to override opions taught to her through out her formative years. Heck some states still have laws against sodomy.
Good Luck,
Kitsune2006

(in reply to TreSwank)

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:41:47 PM

CrazyC

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No. Infact i read somewhere, i think a tantra book, that is where the man's G-spot is. So i checked out when my BF at the time was really at it, lets just say he never told me no again. Hmmm, i'll have to try to find that source again.

(in reply to Kitsune2006)

Post #: 17

RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:42:56 PM

Aine

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Joined: 4/12/2005
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Seeing as the anus is a natural erogenous zone for both males and females, there is nothing pointing towards a person's sexual preference when you read about erogenous zones.

I find it utter bullshit to label someone or -try- to label someone because of a freakin erogenous zone that applies to ALL of us.

And the same thing goes for the prostate. It's generally well known that the stimulation of the prostate lends to a male's orgasm.

So....does stimulating the male prostate have jack shit to to with him being gay? Abso-fucking-lutely not.

Now....when you get into WHO is that person's preference for such an activity is the Red Flag for me.

If I were to try such stimulation on my boyfriend and it did nothing for him, yet if for some whacky ass (no pun intended) reason it only excited him if a male were to do it or the idea of a male doing it....THEN I would question his previous statement that he is straight.

Not that that is a bad thing, I would just ask him about it and I honestly couldn't give a flying fuck if he -were- a bisexual (I'm one too). But if he were gay....he's a damn good actor lmfao.

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RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:50:07 PM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
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quote:

If a man requests to be on the receiving end of anal play (fingers and/or objects up the ass), do you view him as being less masculine, or perhaps suspect that he's been lying to you about his sexual orientation?

Nope.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to TreSwank)

Post #: 19

RE: Anal Play and Masculinity (A Question to Women) - 11/6/2006 2:52:14 PM

mstrjx

Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bearlee

"Do you know what you taste like?"

Well, as one who responded favorably in the thread that LA used, I suppose I could respond to this as well .........

When DON'T I know what I taste like.

I mean, please.

Jeff

_____________________________

Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

(in reply to Bearlee)

Post #: 20

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