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RE: Orgasm denial - 11/14/2008 4:54:33 PM

dawntreader

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Joined: 11/23/2006
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That was hot and should not be read when one's partner is several states away at the moment!

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Post #: 81

RE: Orgasm denial - 11/15/2008 2:53:12 AM

Barelily

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quote:

What are your thoughts? Do you enjoy orgasm control and if so, why? Have you been denied orgasms? What does it bring you?

Rover said it perfectly, but I'll add that for me since my basic personality is an "Instant gratification" type, orgasm control has an extra edge to it for me so I absolutely love it. It's all about power and control.

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Post #: 82

RE: Orgasm denial - 11/15/2008 5:40:45 AM

RainydayNE

Posts: 978
Joined: 10/21/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Denial as in no orgasms for weeks or months on end doesn't usually work on women. Women's libidos turn off and we start thinking of our partner as an unpaid roommate instead, and start thinking that a cat would be better. For malesubs, orgasm denial works. The problem here is that male doms assume that since no sex partner makes them horny enough to jump the first watermelon with a hole in it, it will also do that to women. It doesn't and they need to learn how women work, shows severe lack of vision or forethought that they haven't done the slightest research.

Orgasm control, as in tie me up and tease me for an hour or so until giving me one so intense I pass out? Yes please. And talk about squirting at that time. Forced orgasms as in tie me up and keeping your hand there even when I can't breathe, demanding another when I'm begging to stop, trying to squirm away, leaving me unable to walk and talk or do anything for the next couple of days but cling to him? Those I'll take any time.

However there are some men without vision who assume that dominant means giving the sub nothing they like. It's a stupid viewpoint and one that winds up losing them the sub. Because nobody wants for a partner someone who takes away anything pleasurable. Control is one thing but denial is just removing everything of value to a person and then wondering why they refer to you as an abusive creep.

I can cum during play on command, and I cum once if he slides a finger up me even if I'm not aroused. He's taught that simply by teasing me and then always pushing his fingers in at the moment of orgasm. Pavlovian so now I orgasm when he inserts his finger even without the teasing. Same way as I flinch when he puts his hand over my knee because most of the time he then squeezes right above the knee knowing I hate it.

really great points here (especially that bit about cats haha ^_^)

orgasm control interests me because him having THAT kind of control over me would just be ridiculously amazing.

(in reply to DesFIP)

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Post #: 83

RE: Orgasm denial - 11/15/2008 6:18:24 PM

hardbodysub

Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile2

I'm totally against orgasm denial, along with withholding sex as punishment. Anything that can have a direct negative effect upon the sexual aspects of the relationship. I'm not into Chasity.

Orgasm control is often associated with denial, they are not the same. Yes, it is about control, and it's also about pleasure and teasing. Also, I enjoy hearing somebody beg to cum. I enjoy prolonging orgasms as well at times. Orgasm control itself even turns me on. Hell, I admit to it! It turns me on.

More times then not, I'm known for giving my partner permission to cum, I think it's hot when they are begging for it. I know they are on the edge of cumming. I might deny them permission if I want to drag things out with more teasing. All depends upon the moment, mood and what is going on between us.

Truth be known, I'm such a freak, I practice orgasm control with myself. I might deny and keep myself from cumming at times. I even do this so I can hear them beg for my cum, if that makes any sense. Again, all back to the mood, moment and what is going on. If I'm saving my cum for certain place I want to cum in or on, I'll use orgasm control on myself.

What I love are multiple orgasms! Those simply rock! All depends upon how many before somebody needs a break.

So orgasm control is not something I do with just my partner, it's something that applies to both me and her. Yes, it's all about control over what is going on. :-)

I agree substantially with the above, but I don't consider orgasm denial to be something that's permanent and/or 24/7. In fact, the above post is a bit inconsistent on this as well. The first paragraph states "I'm totally against orgasm denial", but later on there's "I might deny and keep myself from cumming at times".

It appears that the writer is trying to say that the phrase "orgasm denial" means complete denial, and orgasm control is distinguished from orgasm denial because of this. I disagree with that. To me, the phrase orgasm denial doesn't imply anything beyond the activity (or lack thereof). It can be short-term or long-term, just as chastity can. Orgasm denial is often used as part of orgasm control. If you're talking about full-time or permanent chastity or orgasm denial, then you need to state that; it's not implied by the term itself.

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Post #: 84

RE: Orgasm denial - 11/15/2008 6:41:27 PM

greeneyedreamer

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Well, I agree there is a big difference between orgasm denial and orgasm control. I ADORE, Absoultely love, need and crave control but find denial to be a terrible horrible no good very bad thing! Orgasm control shows that my D has total control over my release, it pleases him and drives me wild. Denial makes me think he's a sadist.

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RE: Orgasm denial - 11/15/2008 7:09:56 PM

babygirlkitten

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Joined: 10/25/2008
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I had a submissive that had difficulty having orgasms. I found that if she practiced orgasm denial, coupled with daily masturbation, for a few days, and when she was allowed to have an orgasm, it came much easier to her. In speaking with another submissive who had the same difficulty with orgasms, and whose Dominant had her practice orgasm denial had similar results. So, it does have its positives.

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Post #: 86

RE: Orgasm denial - 11/15/2008 8:20:34 PM

slavegirljoy

Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

What are your thoughts? Do you enjoy orgasm control and if so, why? Have you been denied orgasms? What does it bring you?
Kyst

For me and my Master, orgasm control isn't about orgasm denial. It's about orgasms that are generated, not from within myself but, from my Master and are given to me by Him on His terms, not mine.

It's another way in which He controls me. He is solely responsible for my sexual pleasure. He decides when i can orgasm, which i always do, maybe not as soon as i would on my own accord but, i am never denied orgasm. Even when i beg and plead for Him to allow me to orgasm, it's His choice when He will let me. He has trained me to not spontaneously orgasm but, to wait for His command.

Delaying my orgasms actually heightens the pleasure i get from them. And, i appreciate my orgasms more than i ever have before. Plus, i can orgasm nearly anytime He tells me to, no matter where i am or what i'm doing, even when there isn't any sexual contact taking place. So, i get to have orgasms under a wider variety of settings and situations than i ever have before. In fact, i get to have orgasms in public, without engaging in any public sex. THAT, for me, is a huge benefit to orgasm control.

joy
Master David's voluntary erotic-domestic slave

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RE: Orgasm denial - 11/17/2008 8:29:53 AM

compassionatedad

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quote:

ORIGINAL: slavegirljoy

For me and my Master, orgasm control isn't about orgasm denial. It's about orgasms that are generated, not from within myself but, from my Master and are given to me by Him on His terms, not mine.

Absolutely correct and something that is largely misunderstood. Orgasm control can be denial at times, forced at times, administered by Master/Mistress, self administered (under instructions), private, semi-public, very public, in person or through remote control. In any of these ways, the opportunity to receive pleasure/orgasm is relinquished to the Master/Mistress and it would be entirely for their amusement. Tim

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Post #: 88

RE: Orgasm denial - 11/17/2008 11:10:44 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
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quote:

Do you enjoy orgasm control and if so, why?

yes.
#1. it makes Him happy.
#2. because this slave is afflicted with a female version of "priapism", "premature ejaculation" coupled with the wiring of a sexual submissive, having to wait until he says so is sometimes an effort in futility...as it is very very hot to be dominated like that, and this slave has a "hair" trigger.

however, since He has taken over, He has actually been able to delay the inevitable flood of orgasms, starting with a nano-second and moving up...being able to enjoy the feeling of intercourse, without ruining it with a bunch of orgasmic exhaustion, is, well, awesome!!!

quote:

Have you been denied orgasms?

yes.

quote:

What does it bring you?

pleasure...in satisfying Master and in that it offers time to enjoy the other aspects of intimate sexual relations

... instead of just ratcheting off orgasms as if this slave is in the thrall of some sort of seizure

.

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 11/17/2008 11:14:05 AM >

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RE: Orgasm denial - 11/17/2008 1:58:07 PM

Hisunfoldinglily

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my Master has always done orgasm denial with me. i have a fast trigger and i am multi orgasmic. At first i absolutely hated it and there are many times i still do. Especially when it gets to the point i am crying as i beg for relief. But there has been a wonderful benefit for me. i feel far more sated and satisfied holding back. There are many times that He allows me to release more than once after he has had me wait a reasonable amount of time. But oh man that first release after denial and teasing is so freaking explosive.

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Post #: 90