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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 4:34:41 AM   
michaelOfGeorgia


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while i appreciate everyone's input and emails, i must re-state that i do not have transportation of my own and getting around town is almost impossible for me.

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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 5:03:46 AM   
AGphoenixspirit


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Joined: 12/19/2006
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hello
just been reading this thread  and am struck  by this thought:-

Are you wanting  someone to say here you are  a form of transport, a magic pill, a  sort your life out for you  plan????

sorry they dont exist

i too suffer depression and  am a cutter & agorphobic  been thru  hell and back  but there is only one person in these threads that can actually change things is you . 

W/we can all suggest  things but its up to you to get off the computer and do one  thing  just one before   coming back  then  do one more thing.

start  with some thing real small  like doing the washing up   for me that was a major thing  and something that i can now reconise  that things are  starting to  get rocky again.

its not easy  but  truely A/all these people  have been there  and are there  for you just time to stop  and get up and  do.

then let us  know the tiny achievement  marking  step one

for every journey begins with the first step

tc

(in reply to michaelOfGeorgia)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 5:38:08 AM   
SlaveAkasha


Posts: 726
Joined: 9/30/2006
From: Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

i'm alergic to prozac...and other anti-depressants are ineffective...been on them all at one time or other.


quote:

  i live in a moble home with neighbors too close by. can't do any screaming without involving the cops


quote:

  where i life, i'm not close to wooded areas. i guess i could go out and start a fight with a gang.


quote:

  i've also stated i do not have transportation as well.


quote:

  while i appreciate everyone's input and emails, i must re-state that i do not have transportation of my own and getting around town is almost impossible for me.


I am noticing a pattern and I am sure others are and that's why you were afraid of a flaming when you even started the thread to begin with.
 
You have been offered well thought out responses, from myself and others..and this is what we get in return for our time and effort. 
 
You always have an excuse, a reason why you can't do something, or won't try it.
 
Just because one thing doesn't work one time, doesn't mean it won't the next. 
 
For instance... I have tried meditation in the past, it works sometimes and other times it doesn't.  I set up an alter in my living room the other day, where I have put candles, a cross, and other things that give me comfort or put  me in a more spiritual place.  The time I spend there isn't hours a day, only a few minutes..but for those minutes, I am trying to clear my mind, pray, release pain, stress...whatever I feel like doing at that moment. 
 
The thing is, I was open that it could help, I allowed myself to find help and peace in the action I am doing. 
 
Sometimes when I am ready to scream, I go out and take a walk ( I don't have a car either, that's what legs are for)..it might only be around the block, but it gives me a few moments to just "be".
 
Most of us at some point in our lives have been hurt, abandoned, despressed, had loss, been unemployed, etc.... but it's the ones that don't let it totally rule them for the rest of their lives that have won.  Their struggle does not end by some magic pill, or solution..it ends because they have had enough crying, hurting, not living, despair, and even their own whining about it and are ready to get on with their lives no matter the circumstance.
 
We all don't have perfecf lives, and haven't.  I have lived in a mobile home, I have lived in public housing, I have been close to homeless... I have had great jobs and no job.. I have loved very much, I have lost those I loved, I have loved and not been loved back... I have not been able to have the one thing my heart desires (a baby)...but each day I have to make the choice to get out of that bed and make the best and most of what I DO have. 
 
I am very blessed to live in a nice house, have someone that loves me, wonderful animals, and family I love.  Those were not things I always had, even a few months ago..but now I do.  I don't take one moment for granted, and I still find myself heading for depression, pills, cutting, eating, bulimia, drinking..etc..but I stop and take care of it before it gets to the point where I find myself sitting with a razor blade to my wrist again. 
 
It's hard, but I do it and so do millions of others everyday.
 
I do wish you luck, but that won't get you anywhere unless you are ready for the work it takes to get there.
 
Kasha

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(in reply to michaelOfGeorgia)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 7:03:31 AM   
spankmepink11


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Hi Michael,
Like most have, and will say,  "we've all been there" .   Also, something thats been said and holds very true,  is the fact that no matter how bad we feel, some where, some one is going through far worse.  
 I was sitting home alone on NYE after both my plans A and B  for the evening,  had fallen through.  A friend stopped by with a small bottle of  wine in order to toast the new year  with me,even though he  doesn't drink and had other plans, he made a point to stop in.  Here i was...all weepy in  self pity,  and of course my friend was concerned....listened attentively....and then said a few words of encouragement.  This in itself was not what stopped me dead in my self pitying tracks, what did it, was the fact that this person is an amputee,  whose  house had been broken into over the holidays, divesting him of most of his belongings, yet here he sat, concerned and sympathetic.  It really did shame me...and i told him so.  But it also was a nudge in a positive direction.
The next thing i did was set a small goal...just one , for the next day. It was a lot of work, but when i finished, i felt considerably better in general. it really did lighten my heart.
With all that being said, i guess my main advice would be to first realize that things are far worse for some, and to make small attainable goals,...one at a time,  and complete them. (i think others have advised that as well).
And as a little frosting on the cake...i also agree with those who say to get outside in some sunshine,  and fresh air. Take a walk. The weathers been quite balmy here in GA.
When all else fails, blast your favorite music and sing at the top of your lungs.

good luck 

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Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 7:36:03 AM   
SweetSarijane


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From: KC area Missouri
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I'm diagnosed with massive depressive disorder and things get really bad at times. I do take medicine, but even on meds episodes still creep up on you. When one hits me and gets me down and doing bad, I plug in the headphones and blast music, do journal entries in my private journal, read, sit outside on the porch and let my mind begin to drift, play on a videogame for awhile, among other things....just simple things that I don't have to go anywhere or pay to do. They don't all work all the time, but I go through them until I hit one that is working and if it stops working, stops helping, then I go through the things again until I hit another one that works/helps. I have lived with this and battled it since my teens and many of those years were undiagnosed. After my last UM was born over 7 years ago, finally it was caught and diagnosed and treatment begun. Since that time, I have worked hard to build defense mechanisms, as I mentioned, to help me crawl back out of the hole I tend to go hide in when things weigh me down. For me the medicine does work, but meds aren't foolproof and perfect, I still have to battle at times even with the meds. Right now I'm in a battle to overcome a downer. I'm starting to win finally. When I get bad, I don't want anyone near me, just want to be left alone to curl up and hide and I tend to lash out and drive others away until I finally start regaining control. I hope you are able to find something in all the advice and suggestions given in this thread to help you take the first step in the battle back up.

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(in reply to spankmepink11)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 7:48:25 AM   
cjenny


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Go for a walk. It costs nothing but it will get your body moving. Clean your living space, donate what you don't need. Rearrange your furniture. STAY OFFLINE. Seriously being online for hours can really isolate you emotionally, then it is even harder to make a move.
Depression can be paralyzing, so you need to move your body around.
Break the routine of just sitting in front of the pc or television & go outside for a long walk. Or take a bus to a free museum :) I love doing that.

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Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 8:35:21 AM   
MagiksSlave


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actually a walk might help... I like to walk in the rain, then come in strip off the wet cloths and snuggle under the blanket with some coco or coffie.

Do something to release endorfens.. someone mentioned sex and honestly Masterbation isnt a bad idea.. orgasm releases chemicals in your brain that make you feel good. the same thing with exersize. Take a jog around the block that may help too. Watch a funny movie something you KNOW will make you lough. I know it is easier said then done... All these options are always open to me to make me feel better but sometimes I know the feeling where you just want to wallow in the sadness and self pitty and as much as you hate the feelings you dont want to make them go away.

Magik's slave

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If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 9:19:52 AM   
Devilslilsister


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hiya Michael - yeah i've been going through abit of a downer lately too.  Its been bugging me too.  I tend to just shut down until i find those brief periods where i can manage and i come back up to the surface for abit.. and then i shut down again. 

I hole up in a book.. gee its nice to get away.. i hole up in my bed and watch TV .. gee its nice to get away...

i just basically seperate myself from life.  I say "screw you life, get lost" and i shut it off.  Right now my heads done in abit as i have to go up to georgia tomorrow (and act oh so happy and normal), come back do a doctors appointment, do a legal appointment, get my kid back into school.. get myself back into school... bah  <smiles>  i havent even fully registered for classes, much less paid or gotten the books and school for me starts in 6 days.  Bah.. wheres my bed.  lol

Do whats got to be done and take momentary breaks to shut it all off.  I've also in the past tried to find little things that brought my mood up.  Anything that i could possibly be happy about - i made it the most exciting thing.  I started it all off with a can of pepsi.  i love pepsi so having a can of pepsi was a "yay" experience for me. 


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Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 9:34:38 AM   
missturbation


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From: another planet
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Hey Michael, Firstly i'm sorry to hear you are feeling so down. This time of year (xmas / new year) brings out the depression in a lot of people, me included.
My suggestion and i know it may not work for you but it sure does for me is retreat. Apart from my closest friends and occassional outings when i feel strong enough i shut myself off from the world.
I take the time, just lazing on my bed or whatever to think, random thoughts that just flow and make no sense at first. Gradually the fog clears for me and i start to rationalise my thoughts.
Get a pen and paper or your diary and just write whatever you feel, think, your hopes, your fears, the good, the bad - anything you can imagine. Read it back a few days later and see how you feel about it then. I'll virtually guarantee you'll wonder why the bad was so bad and why you were so scared!!
Ive been lucky this year i had someone very special to talk to and he made this time of year much more bearable for me  Thank you God x

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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 9:38:36 AM   
KatyLied


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From: Pennsylvania
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This thread sounds familiar to me. 
I can understand you wanting support.  But you are not receiving the suggestions, you are making excuses.  It is possible that you require advice and support beyond the scope of what strangers on a message board can offer.  Does your county have a mental health crisis hotline?  They can perhaps give you some referrals.  I'm talking about an initial phone call to get information.

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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 9:42:02 AM   
michaelOfGeorgia


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from some previous posts, i am hesitant to make any further replies since everything i say comes out as an excuse rather than an explaination.

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Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 9:43:37 AM   
mnottertail


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Joined: 11/3/2004
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Youre the kind of person
You meet at certain dismal dull affairs.
Center of a crowd, talking much too loud
Running up and down the stairs.
Well, it seems to me that you have seen too much in too few years.
And though youve tried you just cant hide
Your eyes are edged with tears.

You better stop
Look around
Here it comes, here it comes, here it comes, here it comes
Here comes your nine-teenth nervous breakdown.

When you were a child
You were treated kind
But you were never brought up right.
You were always spoiled with a thousand toys
But still you cried all night.
Your mother who neglected you
Owes a million dollars tax.
And your fathers still perfecting ways of making ceiling wax.

You better stop, look around
Here it comes, here it comes, here it comes, here it comes
Here comes your nilne-teenth nervous breakdown.

Oh, whos to blame, that girls just insane.
Well nothing I do dont seem to work,
It only seems to make matters worse. oh please.

You were still in school
When you had that fool
Who really messed your mind.
And after that you turned your back
On treating people kind.
On our first trip
I tried so hard to rearrange your mind.
But after while I realized you were disarranging mine.

You better stop, look around
Here it comes, here it comes, here it comes, here it comes
Here comes your nine-teenth nervous breakdown.
Here comes your nine-teenth nervous breakdown
Here comes your nine-teenth nervous breakdown The Stones.................... Ponder this a while and perhaps you will be enlightened Ron 

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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 9:44:00 AM   
MissyRane


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after a big good panic attack you think much more clearly..or at least feel better..that's my experience anyway
but ya more healthy way.. go out n run n then sit down n write ur crisis down n try organizing a little bit like taking maybe 10 mins. to think about this stuff..then another 10 for the next thing n try just take 1 thing at a time

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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 9:53:36 AM   
Aileen68


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Michael...you've received a ton of advice from people here who have experienced depression themselves.  Most of what the've said has not required a car or money.  Move your body, listen to loud music (if it bothers your neighbors then use headphones), draw, write, sing, clean.  You might be surprised how checking things off of a list can feel very rewarding and uplifting.  Try some...you may find that you like them.

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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 11:42:58 AM   
Elegant


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Joined: 3/15/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelOfGeorgia

from some previous posts, i am hesitant to make any further replies since everything i say comes out as an excuse rather than an explaination.


That is probably because you only offer excuses, not explainations.

Why can you not walk (as suggested by many)? No shoes? No feet? Heck, even if you are in a wheelchair, some time outdoors can mkea positive difference in a mood.

Why can you not spend time away from the computer (as suggested by many)? Are you being forced to stay online by someone? Is your chair chained to the computer desk?

What is your excuse/explaination for not trying the other things suggested by many folks here?




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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 11:47:03 AM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Elegant

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelOfGeorgia

from some previous posts, i am hesitant to make any further replies since everything i say comes out as an excuse rather than an explaination.


That is probably because you only offer excuses, not explainations.

Why can you not walk (as suggested by many)? No shoes? No feet? Heck, even if you are in a wheelchair, some time outdoors can mkea positive difference in a mood.

Why can you not spend time away from the computer (as suggested by many)? Are you being forced to stay online by someone? Is your chair chained to the computer desk?

What is your excuse/explaination for not trying the other things suggested by many folks here?


I (and many others) have tried to offer him suggestions.  However, it's become clear that his aim isn't what he says it is.  In reality, I think he gets off on pity and the posts have been supporting him.

In my opinion, he needs to get out... both of the closet and of the house.  However, it's not going to happen as long as he's happy being the pity queen.



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Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 11:48:36 AM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
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quote:

both of the closet and of the house.


what the fuck is that first part supposed to mean?


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RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 11:48:53 AM   
meatcleaver


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quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelOfGeorgia

i have been so under stress lately that i can't even think straight. so many things going on lately that my anxiety is very high. nothing seems to help. i just want to scream at the top of my lungs.

anyone else here ever get this way?



I had a bloody relationahip with it. She was a high maintenance bitch. LOL

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Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 12:41:46 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

quote:

ORIGINAL: Elegant

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelOfGeorgia

from some previous posts, i am hesitant to make any further replies since everything i say comes out as an excuse rather than an explaination.


That is probably because you only offer excuses, not explainations.

Why can you not walk (as suggested by many)? No shoes? No feet? Heck, even if you are in a wheelchair, some time outdoors can mkea positive difference in a mood.

Why can you not spend time away from the computer (as suggested by many)? Are you being forced to stay online by someone? Is your chair chained to the computer desk?

What is your excuse/explaination for not trying the other things suggested by many folks here?


I (and many others) have tried to offer him suggestions.  However, it's become clear that his aim isn't what he says it is.  In reality, I think he gets off on pity and the posts have been supporting him.

In my opinion, he needs to get out... both of the closet and of the house.  However, it's not going to happen as long as he's happy being the pity queen.




Michael, you have been given tons of good advice, all of which you skillfully deflect.  It appears as though (as usual) you aren't going to take ANY of the very good advice that all of these nice people have offered to you.

I'm not going to kiss your ass and play along with your little game of pity poor Michael.  I am, however going to show you some of the advice that you gave to another sub who was miserable and not getting what he wanted...

click here...

or here....

or here...


and see what a different person you were when you had a better perspective on your life.  Why was that?  What was different for you then?  How can you get back to that?  Figure those things out and you will be well on your way to being happier.



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"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Heading for a breakdown - 1/2/2007 2:22:52 PM   
dcnovice


Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

start  with some thing real small  like doing the washing up   for me that was a major thing 


I'm constantly amazed by how even small improvements to my living space can buoy my mood.

BTW, Welcome to the message boards, AG! Your practical compasion made for a promising first post, and I hope we'll hear more from you.

< Message edited by dcnovice -- 1/2/2007 2:25:25 PM >

(in reply to AGphoenixspirit)
Profile   Post #: 60
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