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Judging someone online by the quality of their communic... - 1/3/2007 8:11:50 AM   
DominaSmartass


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I'm sure this topic has been covered before, probably many times. I'm just curious (inspired by a recent thread with some really incoherent typing...)

How does the way someone communicates online affect the way you "see" them? Do you ignore typos, incorrect spelling, or grammar mistakes because it's just not that important? Or does it turn you off to someone completely when they don't seem to have a firm grasp on the language - or on their keyboard?
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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:17:15 AM   
julietsierra


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I ignore the grammar and look at the content.

Far too many people have far too many issues with different learning disabilities that I can't possibly be aware of when reading their posts to give too much credence to typos.

One of those people is one of the most brilliant men I know...and when I get too full of myself that I start to judge the person on the basis of his or her spelling, I remind myself of that person and quickly put an end that kind of behavior from me.

Now, run-on sentences (trying not to point out that my response here includes two very long sentences)...that's another story...

But then, I judge myself the harshest.

juliet



< Message edited by julietsierra -- 1/3/2007 8:21:03 AM >

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:20:22 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


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http://www.collarchat.com/m_714558/mpage_1/key_media/tm.htm#714564
Can written presentation discredit a person?

In an forum in which text is the sole form of communication, how well one can manipulate that media WILL affect how they are perceived and taken seriously.


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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:20:37 AM   
sleazy


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I skip the odd typo, heck I make enough of them myself! I also regularly communicate with people who do not have english as a fist language, and one of my favourite friends is actually dyslexic. I place much more value on the content and what I see as the intent of the post. Having said that I will often skip over posts that use big colourful bold fonts, simply because I hate having to scroll down every other line when surfing via PDA.

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:24:28 AM   
julietsierra


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quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazy

I also regularly communicate with people who do not have english as a fist language, and one of my favourite friends is actually dyslexic.


Ok, now that's just darn exciting!!!!

*fanning myself*

juliet

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:30:46 AM   
DominaSmartass


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross


In an forum...


Is there a new rule for using an vs. a that I haven't heard of? Hehe ;)

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:35:41 AM   
sleazy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazy

I also regularly communicate with people who do not have english as a fist language, and one of my favourite friends is actually dyslexic.


Ok, now that's just darn exciting!!!!

*fanning myself*

juliet




Guess that just proves the point about my own terrible spelling sometimes

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:38:17 AM   
julietsierra


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quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazy

quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazy

I also regularly communicate with people who do not have english as a fist language, and one of my favourite friends is actually dyslexic.


Ok, now that's just darn exciting!!!!

*fanning myself*

juliet




Guess that just proves the point about my own terrible spelling sometimes


And shows how sometimes, typos can make an interesting topic that much more interesting!!!

juliet

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:41:06 AM   
brightspot


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

I'm sure this topic has been covered before, probably many times. I'm just curious (inspired by a recent thread with some really incoherent typing...)

How does the way someone communicates online affect the way you "see" them? Do you ignore typos, incorrect spelling, or grammar mistakes because it's just not that important? Or does it turn you off to someone completely when they don't seem to have a firm grasp on the language - or on their keyboard?


Bfero wehn tihs sujbect hsa cmoe up , I have wrtten like tihs and I bte everynoe hrre can nuderstand what I hvae wrtten.
I dno't let Myeslf be al thta bohtered by someones tpying or speling. Threr are othre tings taht bug my more in camunicasion on the net than speling or tipois.
 
I do, though, appreciate when people take the time to spell check or do their best with the langauge or when I feel they are doing their best to communicate clearly.
 
Missy

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:48:44 AM   
toservez


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We are always taking input from or senses and consciously or subconsciously making judgments with the data we are receiving. To some one thing will be important and to another it would be stupid and vice versa.

For me writing and communication skills have there place in how I do see people. Certainly a typo or two and questionable grammar can be and should be overlooked when it is here and there and not a bunch in place as I am certainly guilty of destroying the language on occasion.

On the whole though, what you write when making yourself known through this media is in fact a presentation of yourself. If going to a bar to try to find someone you would not go not showered, smelling and have on dirty and clothes that are well below what everyone else is wearing. When talking to a person the first time you probably does not start using the F word every other word in your conversation? To me if you are serious and wanting to be taken seriously typing a profile or message to someone and running it through a word processor with spell and grammar check seems to be a very small step to do for a very big step in how you want to present yourself.


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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:50:45 AM   
DominaSmartass


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quote:

Bfero wehn tihs sujbect hsa cmoe up , I have wrtten like tihs and I bte everynoe hrre can nuderstand what I hvae wrtten. I dno't let Myeslf be al thta bohtered by someones tpying or speling. Threr are othre tings taht bug my more in camunicasion on the net than speling or tipois.  


Yes, yes, we all know that it's been proven that as long as a word has the same first and last letters as it normally would, the ones in the middle can be scrambled up and still read fairly easily. The point it, it hurts my brain to read something like what you have written above. What also hurts my brain is to have to see things spelled phonetically as if by a 3rd grader. Now this is my own personal hang up and I can certainly choose not to read those posts if I it bothers me that much. I know this full and well. That doesn't mean I can't still express my distaste at being presented with something by a grown adult who doesn't know how to spell words we learned in elementary school. I also know many people with learning disabilites and dyslexia and I SWEAR none of them are as bad as the people who type on this forum sometimes. I went to a special high school in fact, where I was surrounded by people with one form of learning disability or another (mine happens to be in math) and since I tutored many of my peers and also proofread and edited their papers, I consider myself familiar with and tolerant of those things. It was very common to see someone mistake words like there and their or here and here but it was not at all the norm for students' papers to read like a 4th grader using the hooked on phonics or "huked on foniks" as they might write it, system. There's my rant for the day.

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:52:05 AM   
onestandingstill


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Hi All,
I think there are lots of quality people in here who do not have grammar and usages one of their strong points or assets.
I'm not so worried about spelling and proper sentence structure as much what they are trying to convey.
It's not an english quiz so it does not bother me too much if writing well is not one of their strong suits.
It actually offends me that lots of the posters in these boards embarrass people and make them feel unwelcome over this very issue.


One of the smartest and most creative men I ever had the pleasure to call a friend was an old farmer in WV I knew.
He could not read and other than his name did not write at all.
He had more intelligence in his punky finger than a whole classroom full of English Majors.
It goes to show you can't always judge a book by the cover or hold others to the standards you set for yourself.
I think those that are so in the good spelling box pass up many a quality person over this trivial stuff in my opinion.
suzanne

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:54:01 AM   
Kalira


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I can generally ignore typos only because I have been known to make them myself; however, I do pay alot of attention to the way a person 'types'; their thought flow and such. It makes a huge impact on how I view them.

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:56:54 AM   
LadySashayy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez

On the whole though, what you write when making yourself known through this media is in fact a presentation of yourself. If going to a bar to try to find someone you would not go not showered, smelling and have on dirty and clothes that are well below what everyone else is wearing. When talking to a person the first time you probably does not start using the F word every other word in your conversation? To me if you are serious and wanting to be taken seriously typing a profile or message to someone and running it through a word processor with spell and grammar check seems to be a very small step to do for a very big step in how you want to present yourself.



Oh definitely! Very well put and compared to the bar idea. I like that as a metaphor for why it is so important to me that potential submissives not write to me as if they were working on a cellphone that only allows them 100 characters per message. Is it really so hard to write properly, in full words, spelling them out appropriately? (e.g. "you", not U; your not "ur" etc. ).

For submissives, it is a sign of disrespect of self and of the Dominant to write to them in such a grotesque mangling of the language. And a Dominant who does this? *wince* Just....wrong.

But then, I'm old fashioned and prefer to err on the side of overt formality.

S.

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 8:59:24 AM   
BDSM05478


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For the most part, as I am one of those terrible spellers, it doesn't bother me. So long as I can atleast get the jist of it but there are like 3 people that I skim their posts cause I can't understand a sentence of it. I do not judge them though 2 are ESL and I admire them for not letting that get in the way of their particapationand 1 is just in outter space and he leaves me just dumbfounded, mouth agape stunned and shaking my head as I ask the computer monitor "wtf was that about??" Now that one I judge lol

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 9:01:56 AM   
WorldofSilence


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Interesting post. :)

I tend to write in how I would speak, simply being certain words I would never utter or use in an everyday conversation so I am not going to stress Myself out in learning how to write it.

I also have a terrible habit of typing/talking in sign every once in a while, so if you want to be confused try and catch Me when I am in that mode. My thought flow (what a wonderful expression) is just like a deaf person, we can speak on one topic for many an hour, unless if I'm tired/stressed etc.. I can't be bothered and type in sign.

I personally try My best when I communicate (unless I'm woefully tired, not easy swapping sign into english and vice versa) , however I will not run it through a spell checker because at the end of the day it's one of My quirks, and beside english is very strange and spells many words to not how they are heard. Sometimes a source of funny conversations I have with My fellow deafies.

Just My two cents :)

WoS

< Message edited by WorldofSilence -- 1/3/2007 9:08:31 AM >


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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 9:09:37 AM   
Venusflames


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As an ex teacher of primary children, I personally would much rather a child attempt to use the 'best fit' word and risk getting it wrong, than keep to a base language.  I personally am more interested in the content than the grammar or the spelling.  Many people have not had the best surroundings or lifestyle to accomodate these skills, or as mentioned have learning difficulties such as dylexia, let alone unruly key boards that stick (like mine).  Having said this, I have been guilty if some one continually makes a common error of explaining it to them, such as: to, too, two or right, write etc.  Those ones are so easy to get wrong, but easy to put right.

< Message edited by Venusflames -- 1/3/2007 9:12:20 AM >


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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 9:10:43 AM   
mbes


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Having known people whose brains get ahead of their fingers, I'm very tolerant. I translate typonese well.
How formally I "talk" myself is entirely situational.

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 9:16:41 AM   
julietsierra


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

That doesn't mean I can't still express my distaste at being presented with something by a grown adult who doesn't know how to spell words we learned in elementary school. I also know many people with learning disabilites and dyslexia and I SWEAR none of them are as bad as the people who type on this forum sometimes. I went to a special high school in fact, where I was surrounded by people with one form of learning disability or another (mine happens to be in math) and since I tutored many of my peers and also proofread and edited their papers, I consider myself familiar with and tolerant of those things. It was very common to see someone mistake words like there and their or here and here but it was not at all the norm for students' papers to read like a 4th grader using the hooked on phonics or "huked on foniks" as they might write it, system. There's my rant for the day.


Just because it was "not at all the norm" for you doesn't mean that the people who have difficulties don't exist. There are some on these boards. I work with people who are significantly impaired when it comes to their spelling abilities.

I recently asked someone if all the teaching anyone ever did and all the self-teaching he ever did on himself had any effect on his ability to spell. His answer: "No. Not a bit. Not at all. For some people phonics sometimes works, but not for everyone."

And the man is brilliant - and in charge of other teachers.

There are presidents of universities that are dyslexic. There are CEOs who are dyslexic - and some of these CEOs are in charge of large well known companies. They are by no means, slackers when it comes to intelligence - even if they can't spell words that most people learned back in elementary school.

Look at 100 people with dyslexia and I can pretty much assure you that you will find 100 different manifestations of dyslexia since it is an umbrella label and not a description of specific difficulties. Flipping ds and bs are just one manifestation. Being unable to set up sentence structure in a "proper" form is another. Being unable to discern one homophone from another (like gait and gate) is another. The inability to differentiate between two similar words (Harry and Larry) is another, and sometimes someone's dyslexia encompasses ALL of these things - including the inability to recall grammatical rules and their myriad of exceptions.

Furthermore, in studies of dyslexic people it's been found that their  brains process about 4 times faster than what is considered "normal." This means that they're certainly not stupid by any means, and if their ability to write could keep pace with their ability to think, it's US who would be considered to be "disabled." 

When it comes to spelling though, instead of seeing the word in their heads like most of us learn to do, they see the picture, and then have to sort through things to find the word for what they see, then try to remember how to spell that word, and THEN get it down on paper. Meanwhile, they've just seen 5 more pictures in their heads. An analogy to what they're required to do that we do without even thinking is akin to rubbing your tummy and patting your head at the same time. Some people can, most people can't.

Test yourself. Go watch the movie "Man on Fire" and give a detailed description - in writing -  of just one of the scenes that they present in time-lapse photography before the next scene shows up. You'll get just a TASTE of what a dyslexic goes through on any given day.

So, while it may not have been the norm *for you* to have seen this in your school, that does not say that these situations don't exist for others, and relating EVERYTHING you see in terms of only what you know without regard to the possibilities creates a very small world indeed.

But you're absolutely right...there's nothing out there that says you can't express your "distaste." However the fact that someone's disability is "distasteful" to you says an awful lot. What a shame that "your poor brain" might have to be subjected - even for a short amount of time - to someone else's disability. I feel for you. I really do. Then again, as those people with this disability work hard to make things easier for "your poor brain," I wonder, how their brain feels...

juliet

< Message edited by julietsierra -- 1/3/2007 9:23:07 AM >

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 9:18:11 AM   
gooddogbenji


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Non-masochists who make mistakes should be flogged, masos not.

Good night, and God bless.

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